The Fantastic Adventures of The Marauders
by Bittersweet x
Summary: In that crazy world they lived in, there was only one thing that they were sure of: that they would be best friends forever. This is their story.  A smidge AU here and there.
1. September 1st, 1971

_The Marauders_

_**A story about the progression of the Marauders' friendship, from entering the Great Hall to graduation. **_**:) ****_It will be centered mostly around Sirius and Remus and will be more serious (Sirius?) than funny but there will be pranks (in true Marauder fashion) and James along the line. And I WILL go against my morals and try to fit Peter into there too..._**

_**Fiction Rated: **_**K+**

_**Genre: Friendship/Drama.**_

_**Started: April 27, 2010**_

_**One thing you should know: For the sake of the story, I wiggled the ages a bit, so Andromeda is five years older than them, Narcissa is two, and Bellatrix is six — therefore, at the first year chapters, Andromeda is in sixth year, Narcissa is in third year, Bella is in seventh year, etc. Basically the only canonical (that a word?) thing is Regulus's age. He's two years younger. **_**:)**

Chapter 1

September 1st, 1971

One fine evening on the first of September, four boys tiptoed meekly into the Great Hall. Or at least two of them tiptoed meekly. None of them knew that these four friends would someday be some of the best friends in history.

The boy at the head of the line had a rather extremely nervous expression on his face. He had very light brown hair that was cut viciously short, large brown eyes, and a very pointed nose. Rude hisses of _"what happened to your HAIR?" _and likewise could be heard up and down the line. He was the first meek tiptoer..tiptoe-er..tiptore..he was the first one to tiptoe meekly.

There was a rather fat boy at the end of the line, with rather watery brown eyes and short, but not as short as the other boy's, brown hair. He was slumping, and looked just as nervous as the boy in front, if not more. He was the second meek tip-whatever.

The only sound of commotion was in the middle of the line, where a tall, messy black-haired boy with thick, round glasses was arguing with a small, greasy-haired boy with beady eyes. A boy with long black hair was watching them with an air of somewhat detached interest.

"-I did _not—"_

"You did _too!_"

"No, Potter, I did _not _insult Lily!"

"You did too! You called her a fire cat!"

"That's because of her hair and her eyes, and anyways, I was _kidding! _We're best friends!"

"Very right," put in a redhead who was standing in front of the pair darkly. "Lay off, Potter."

The bespectacled boy smiled suddenly. "Anything you say, my dear Lily."

Lily looked somewhat terrified at this show of emotion, but remained mute, perhaps rendered speechless in terror.

"Hello," said the boy with long dark hair in front of the bespectacled one suddenly. "It is my personal belief, I must say, that calling anyone a fire cat is really kind of rude, you know."

The bespectacled boy nodded emphatically. "See, you have sense."

He bowed. "Thank you, James. I'm Sirius. Well, I'm never _serious.._but my name is Sirius." He winked.

"You two know each other?" asked Lily faintly. She couldn't quite stand the thought of a stalker and a bad pun maker out there together in the world..as _friends._

Sirius frowned. "No, I can't say I do," he said thoughtfully.

"Nor me," realized James.

"Then how did you know his name?" asked Lily, not really wanting to know the answer.

Sirius cracked his knuckle and cackled evilly. "MY SECRETS."

"Reading his name off the sewing of his robes is not secrets," commented the greasy haired boy dryly.

James scowled. "Is it still on there?" he growled. He proceeded to tear off the patch that read JAMES HENRY POTTER.

Sirius narrowed his eyes suspiciously at the greasy haired boy. "And what is _your _name?"

"Snape. Severus Snape," replied Snape, Severus Snape.

"I'm gonna call you Snivellus," declared Sirius cheerfully.

"NO, you aren't!" Snivellus exclaimed.

"I like that," murmured James. "Snivvellllluussss.." He looked up at Sirius. "What did you say your surname was?"

"The Sorting," said a stern voice from the door before Sirius could reply, "will now commence."

The doors swung open and the nervous first years spilled in.

**The first chapter is kinda weak, but it gets more interesting. Really it does! R&R please. :)**


	2. The Sorting of Sirius Black

Chapter 2

The Sorting

None of the first years, not even the pure bloods, were exactly sure what to expect. There were sharp mutters through the line of wrestling trolls and biting creatures and various spells. Therefore, they were, to say the least, a spot bit surprised when a short man, later to be introduced as Professor Flitwick, carried a Hat into the hall. There were even sharper mutters of rabbits and pulling and even more various spells.

And then – amazingly enough – a tear in the Hat crooked open – and – _it began to sing. _

"Oh, you may not think I'm pretty," it sang,

"but don't just by what you see!

"I'll eat myself if you can find

"a smarter hat than me.

"Put me on your empty skulls

("for that is Hogwarts law,)

"I'll tell you where you belong:

"Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, or Ravenclaw!

"Gryffindors, like Mr. Godric, brave and chivalrous they are,

"Ravenclaws, like Madam Rowena, their brains will take them far!

"Hufflepuffs, like Miss Helga, they're sweet and fair and just,

"For Slytherins, like Sir Salazar, being shrewd and cunning is a must.

"So try me on! Slide me on!  
"And after a short chat,

"I'll tell you where you belong,

"for I'm a SORTING HAT!"

Everyone applauded.

"Black, Sirius!" was the first name called.

Sirius looked a little bit terrified as he licked his lips, shoved his hands in his pockets, and began to walk cautiously towards the Sorting Hat.

"You didn't tell me you were a Black!" James's whisper carried across the Hall.

Sirius chose not to reply to this as. James looked around. He knew of the Blacks, because they were all (in)famous for giving assorted people hefty amounts of gold. And for their pure-blood mania. There were lots and lots of them in Slytherin, although not one of them looked very supportive of Sirius. There was a tall, thin girl in Ravenclaw with very long black hair, however, who was staring intently at Sirius as if her life depended on it. James was fairly sure she was related to him. She had a very Sirius like look on her face.

Sirius fumbled with the Hat, finally sliding it on to his head.

_A Black, _a voice said in his ear. _Slytherin, I presume?_

_ "_No,_"_ he thought desperately. _"_I don't want to go there._"_

A chuckle entered Sirius's mind. _And why ever not?_

_ "_I hate the lot of them. They're all stupid maniacs, thinking they're kings, above the rest of the world. I don't want to be like.._ that_._"_

_You'd do well in Slytherin._

_ "_Not Slytherin. _Please _not Slytherin!"

_All right..if you really, really don't want Slytherin..you're the same as that cousin of yours, the Ravenclaw..Gryffindor it is.._

_ "_Gryffindor? But Mum— Mum'll kill me—_"_

"GRYFFINDOR!"

For several moments, there was no applause. There was just complete and utter silence.

** A/N: Dun dun dun! ..Kind of..And yes, I wrote that song all by myself. And yes, I have way too much time on my hands. Updates soon hopefully.**


	3. More Sorting

Chapter 3

More Sorting

Forever after, Andromeda tried to claim the credit for starting to clap first, but technically, James did. Then Andromeda began to, and Ted Tonks was very quick to join in. Then began the boy with the bad hair at the front of the line, and, timidly, the boy at the back began to as well, and slowly the Gryffindor table began to follow suit. An enormously grateful smile split Sirius's face as he jumped from the stool and ran to the Gryffindor table.

Finally, Professor McGonagall called the next name — a Cardoi, Lance, who turned out to be a Hufflepuff. A long list of other names, all going into Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, or Slytherin, followed before finally came a

"Evans, Lily."

The Hat seemed to be in deep thought before screaming

"GRYFFINDOR!"

The Gryffindor table exploded in applause. James was sure he saw Sirius give Lily a jealous face.

The line scurried along. "Lupin, Remus" went in Gryffindor before a second's thought, but it took the Hat ages before deciding to place "Pettigrew, Peter" in the same house. Finally, that Hat balanced on James's head.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Beaming, James scurried to take a seat at the applauding table. He took a seat next to Sirius, who had seated himself across and one away from Remus. Peter sat right next to Remus.

Dumbledore lowered his wand to his mouth and spoke.

"I have a few words to say," he said grandly, "and those are these: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"

"Thank-you!"  
There was a collective laugh.

"Please! Eat!"

**A/N: This chapter is rather pointless..I'm putting another one up to make up for it. :)**


	4. The Monster Begins

Chapter Four

Of Howlers and True Friendships

None of the boys spoke, not all dinner, nor in their shared dormitory that night. They all seemed to be worried about something or the other, perhaps insulting each other, or perhaps they were just shy.

The next morning, the four boys slumped downstairs in silence. They sat down at the table and barely spoke a word throughout the entire meal — that was, until mail arrived.

"Oh _no,_" muttered Sirius.

James looked up and winced as his eye caught the bright red envelope on the table. "Oh, Godric, that sucks," he said, but not unkindly, and in voice full of sympathy. "Might as well open it, mate...you don't want a fire."

Sirius took a deep breath and tore it open.

"_**SIRIUS ORION BLACK!**_"

"I hate it when she calls me that," muttered Sirius, sliding down in his seat. "I _hate _it when she calls me that." Everyone in the hall turned eagerly to see who had gotten the Howler. Even though it was, y'know, somewhat obvious.

_**"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THE LETTER I RECEIVED FROM DUMBLEDORE? GRYFFINDOR? GRYFFINDOR? NOT EVEN THAT **__**GIRL**__** WAS IN GRYFFINDOR!"**_

__Across the hall, Andromeda went a deep red and buried her face in her hands as stares drifted in her direction.

_Why did she have to drag Meda into it? _Sirius thought desperately. _Why? Now she'll hate me too! Oh I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die die die DIE—_

But if Sirius was gonna die die DIE, we'll never know. At that moment, a volley of fireworks shot into the Great Hall, towards the enchanted ceiling. They were probably loud enough to drown out a herd of stampeding wildebeests, and certainly loud enough to drown out mere Howler shrieks. The screams of the school as the fireworks leaped up and down and brushed close to people didn't help the noise.

Sirius looked around in pure relief. _Whoever did that, I owe them my life and maybe some more, _he thought. The only person clutching a wand was the one and only James Potter, looking very determined, muttering hard under his breath. More and more fireworks, red and gold – Gryffindor colors – exploded out of the long, thin stick.

Sirius felt a sweep of warmth throughout his body, and not just because one of the red fireworks came uncomfortably close to his chest. _Thank God thank God thank God._

Curiously enough, none of the teachers leaped up to stop the fireworks. Each and every one of the teachers were staring intently at the Howler, still high up in the air, screaming words no one could hear.

When it finally turned to ashes a minute or so later, Minerva McGonagall leaped up, looked angrily around, pointed her wand, and screamed_ "FINITE INCANATEM!"_

Instantly, the fireworks sizzled and died. James held his wand high and before McGonagall could speak a word, yelled, "It was meeeee!"

McGonagall looked around angrily at the sound of the noise. She spotted James, and something fitted in her mind.

_Why, _she thought, with a sudden burst of realization, _he did it to drown out the noise..of the Howler._

_Well, _she reminded herself, _I have to take points or give a detention or punish him _somehow.

_For loyalty? _she argued with herself. _Because that is what he's doing. Being loyal._

_ It doesn't matter, _she insisted sternly. _Rulebreakers are rulebreakers. You already waited till the Howler was over to stop the fireworks._

_ But it's Walburga Black, _she yelled at herself. _You taught her, you know her. Who knows what horrible things she was saying to Sirius?_

"Fifteen points from Gryffindor!" she finally shouted. "And Mr. Potter, this had better not happen again!"

Pleased with her judgment, she sat down.

Minerva McGonagall had no idea of the wonderful yet terrifying monster she had created..the monster of The Friendship of James Potter and Sirius Black.

After breakfast that day, Sirius ran immediately after James, who had left shortly after he'd finished his eggs, muttering something about not wanting to be tardy the first day, but Sirius could've sworn he spotted the back of a Dungbomb in his pocket.

"Hey James! JAMES!"

James turned around. He stopped and waited for Sirius to catch up.

"I owe you a million Galleons and then some," he panted, skidding up next to James. "I can't — I don't know how to — thanks. Thanks a hundred and one."

James shrugged. "It's nothing. I'm not the kind of person to sit there and listen to people be humiliated. Especially by their own family."

Sirius stuck out his hand. "Friends?"

"Friends." James took the hand and they shook on it.

And two of the four of the best friends in existence, came into existence.

Remus John Lupin was a having a borderline terrible first day. He had already gotten lost too many times to count, and the suit of armor had something against him. He always seemed to be falling over it. And in precisely four minutes, he would be late to Charms. True, there were ten minutes until the lesson started, but Remus considered himself to be late if he was less than five minutes early.

He flew down the stairs, arms overflowing with thick books. He tripped slightly— _oh no, not a shrinking staircase — noooo noooo nooooo NOOOO—_

"Ohhh noooo," he moaned as the step sunk. He lost his footing and fell down, down, down, three flights of stairs. His books went flying.

He landed hard on the bottom of three stone staircases. He experimentally moved his limbs. There was a sharp pain in his right ankle, and when he stood, his legs gave out beneath him. He gasped in pain as he collapsed.

Examining his ankle, he realized it was broken.

"Wonderful,"he muttered. The stairwell was swarming with people, but no one seemed to notice the bad-haired boy clutching his ankle, eyes watering in pain, trying in vain to gather up his belongings.

"Why me?" he muttered to himself again as he tried in vain to pull himself to his feet. "Why is it _always _me? First I got bitten, now this. Was I, like, _born_ on the wrong side of bed?"

"Probably," a voice came from behind him. Remus jumped a foot — had whoever it was heard him talk of being bitten? And if they had, had they interpreted it correctly?

He twisted his neck around and felt a jolt of relief. Behind him were James Potter and Sirius Black. That wasn't what relieved him. The fact that they were scrambling around, passing him his books was what did.

"Th-thanks," he stammered.

"You have the worst luck in the world," replied Sirius. "And you're welcome. I have no idea what you're on about about being 'bitten' but you really do get lost quite a lot.."

"This is the last of them," announced James, crawling out from underneath the staircase with _Hogwarts, A History. _"No offense, mate, but why do you cart _this _around?"

Remus stuffed the books into his bag. "Thanks a million. Pure habit, James. Ever since I could read and my dad told me about Hogwarts – my mum's a Muggle – I carried it around."

"You're a nerd," said James, but something about his tone of voice told Remus he was kidding. "Now, we have to do something about that ankle of yours.."

"We'll get him to Madam Pomfrey, you idiot," Sirius said scornfully. Again, Remus could tell the insult was in good nature. "How we're supposed to get him there.."

"Hmm," said James thoughtfully. He cupped his hands around his mouth and positively screamed "PROFESSOR!"

"_Shush,_" implored Remus. "I'm fine — really I am—"

But when he attempted to pull himself up, he crashed to the ground.

"Stupid ankle," he muttered. A rosy face appeared next to Sirius.

"What's going on?"

"Hullo, it's Peter Pettigrew, isn't it?" said Remus grimly. "I appear to have smashed my ankle."

"Oh!" Peter surprised everyone by saying. "I know what to do!"

"Really?"

"Yes. PROFESSOR!"

"Shut — UP," Remus hissed. Peter shrank back.

"S-sorry..."

Sirius shrugged. "Everyone else is doing it..PROFESSSSOR!"

"You guys will never listen," muttered Remus.

"What is so bad about calling a teacher's aid?" demanded Sirius.

"Aid, Sirius? Really?"

"Shut up, James."

"I don't want to seem like a.." Remus trailed off and heaved a great sigh. "Ahhh, this is KILLING me.."

Together, all three boys yelled, "PROFFFESSOR!"

Minerva McGonagall finally appeared at the top of the stairs. "You three!" she yelled down at them. "Why are you making such a ruckus?"

"REMUS BROKE HIS ANKLE," Sirius yelled over the swelling hallway noise. Remus flushed scarlet.

"Oh," said McGonagall, and with surprising agility and speed, she hurried down the stairs. "Are you all right?" she asked Remus, not unkindly.

"I've been worse," said Remus, still grinding his teeth in pain.

"Oh..well, we'll get you up to the Hospital Wing, anyway..." For a moment Remus had a horrible idea that McGonagall would yell for Madam Pomfrey, but of course she didn't. Instead, she produced a charm rthat splinted Remus's ankle. "Black, Potter, Pettigrew, take him to the Hospital Wing." She looked quickly at Remus. "Lupin, I think it'd be best for you to stay there tonight. You need your strength, after all. Next week is full mo—"

She cut herself off quickly; how _could _she be so stupid? Remus had gone very white.

"Yes, yes, stay there, ah, that ankle, it could, ah, develop into something unpleasant," she ad-libbed quickly. "Yes. Up to the Hospital Wing..the four of you.." Some of the color began to return to the poor boy's face, but he still looked completely terrified.

"Sure thing," said Sirius brightly. He grabbed one of Remus's arms, James grabbed the other, and they hoisted him into a standing position, where Peter carefully steadied him. Somehow they got him up a flight of stairs and down a long hallway to the Hospital Wing.

"What happened to him?" cried Madam Pomfrey, terrified for the poor boy. He was a werewolf! Werewolves shouldn't get hurt!  
"Fell down three flights of stairs," muttered Remus, going somewhat red. How _could _he be so _clumsy.._

"Oh, well, then," she said, still worried. "Well, perhaps you'd best stay, not the night, but for an hour or so – next week is—"

She realized what she was saying, cut herself off, and hurried to prepare a bed for Remus. The color had once more drained from his face.

All three boys looked curiously at Remus.

"What's next week?" asked James.

"Nothing," lied Remus quickly, collapsing into a chair. His heart was beating very, very quickly — no, they couldn't find out, they couldn't know, why him why him why _him_..

"Why are you so pale?" asked Peter curiously.

"Me? I'm not pale. Nope, just normal, that's me. Just fine. Just normal as the hills." Remus knew he was probably whiter than sheet. He was a terrible liar, which was not a good trait to be when you were a..thingy.

"Well," spoke up Sirius, who had been studying his hands, uncharacteristically quietly, "Remus obviously doesn't want to talk about it, so let's just get off his back, okay?"

Remus felt glorious, unheard of relief that he'd never felt before. Thank goodness for Sirius..thank goodness..thank goodness..

"Sorry," said James quickly, but sincerely.

"Yeah. Sorry," squeaked Peter.

"'It's fine," said Remus, lying down, relief still sweeping through him. "Friends?"

"Friends," the three replied in unison.

And with that, the four best friends in existence, came into existence.

** A/N: Yay, they're all friends! The next two chapters will be very dramatic and be centered around Sirius, but they exist to cement the four's friendship. They'll be up by maybe tomorrow or possibly tonight. I've already written quite far into it, so I guess it depends on the feedback I get whether or not I keep posting.**


	5. Another Howler

Chapter Five

Another Howler

The next few weeks passed fairly quickly. Slowly, the friendship of Remus, James, Sirius, and Peter developed. Many nights they stayed up well past curfew, talking about their lives.

Sirius felt a sort of malicious pleasure ranting about his family to people who simply listened and agreed on occasion, never contradicting him. None of them had forgotten the Howler.

Peter, too, enjoyed stammering about how s-s-st-_stupid _he thought he was, and listening to the quick contradictions.

Remus wished and wished he could tell them his Secret, but was too afraid of losing them. All the same, he didn't mind complaining about the effects his Secret had on him, without actually telling them his secret. How he was so often _sick _(he didn't dare tell _why) _and how they so often had to go to the _hospital _(St. Mungo's, actually, but they didn't have to know that) and how the medical bill simply ate up their money, how poor they were, how they and how mother couldn't afford a barber and so cut his hair at home (and she really, really was bad at that) how people didn't hire his dad (because every month, he had to take off to help his 'sick' son heal, but they _really _didn't have to know that) how downright awful his life could get.

And James just liked listening, occasionally putting in his input and words of comfort.

Then, one day near the end of September, when the Marauders had become very close, something rather horrible happened. Consequently, their friendship was cemented forever.

It was an ordinary Saturday. The Marauders climbed out of bed early, all except Remus, who liked to sleep till noon when he could. Peter, James, and Sirius each woke up at six as usual and sprawled themselves out around the room, not really talking, each doing their own thing, but liking the fact that they were all there.

When the clock read nine thirty five and none of them could take their starvation, Sirius somehow pulled Remus out of his trance-like sleep and the four raced each other to the Great Hall for breakfast. They talked rapidly as they wolfed down their breakfasts, about everything and nothing and a couple things in between.

There was a great rush of owls, and three of the boys looked up to see if they'd gotten anything. Sirius kept his eyes affixed on his toast. He obviously wasn't expecting anything. He didn't particularly want anything.

Ironically, James, Peter, and Remus got nothing, but a menacing red envelope landed on Sirius's plate. Again.

He slammed his head against the table. "I _refuse _to open it," he proclaimed.

"Sirius," said Remus gently, "it will be somewhat...er...worse, if you don't open it."

"How?" demanded Sirius, crossing his arms.

"Well, see, the elements of the paper, mixed with the building heat of the letter, will meld, and the thing will explode, magnifying the voice in question to four times as loud as it normally would go, which is already one hundred times as loud as your mother's normal yells. Thereby, after the fire goes out, the envelope will scream four hundred times louder than your mother's normal voice, which I trust to be quite loud on its own," Remus explained in one breath.

His speech was greeted by awed, rather frightened looks.

"You're too smart for your own good," proclaimed James.

"It won't magnify if the fire doesn't go out," pointed out Sirius resolutely, ignoring James.

"It will," Remus assured him.

"I'm still not—" Sirius was cut off by a burst of flames. He screamed and looked around frantically around for a jug of water, but before he could put out the flames, they snuffed out by themselves, and Sirius's mother's voice burst out, magnified four hundred times. James quickly realized there was no point in setting off fireworks or any other disruption. The Howler this time was much, much louder, and _nothing _would drown it out.

Sirius gulped.

"_**SIRIUS ORION BLACK!**_"

"Will someone please tell her to stop calling me that," muttered Sirius, sliding down in his chair.

"_**WHAT IS THIS I HEAR ABOUT YOU FRATERNIZING WITH COMPLETE FILTH?"**_

__Remus, James, and Peter suddenly looked as if they'd rather not be where they were.

_**"BLOOD TRAITORS! BLOOD TRAITORS WHO FRATERNIZE WITH THE ANIMALS THAT ARE MUGGLES! FILTH! **__**FILTH!**__** WALKING AROUND LIKE THEY'RE MUGGLE THEMSELVES! DISGUSTING! **__**IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO BECOME?**__**"**_

__James bit his lip and lowered his eyes.

_** "AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON PETTIGREW! BLOOD BETRAYING, HALF WITTED OAF OF A CHILD!"**_

__Peter looked as if he was near tears.

"_**YOU ARE ALSO SPENDING TIME WITH A MUGGLEBORN! A **__**MUGGLE'S SON**__**! MUGGLEBORNS DON'T DESERVE TO ENTER THE SACRED HALLS OF HOGWARTS ! A HUNDRED TIMES WORSE THAN BLOOD TRAITORS! THEY ARE RELATED TO MUGGLES! THEY **_**ARE **_**MUGGLES! HORRIBLE ANIMAL-LIKE CREATURES! RELATED TO THEM, THEM THEMSELVES! DO YOU KNOW WHAT FRATERNIZING WITH THEM MAKES YOU? IT MAKES YOU A BLOOD TRAITOR! YOU DISGUST ME, BOY!"**_

__Remus shrank down in his seat, looking rather as if he'd like to disappear.

"_**I—**_**NEVER—**_**WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOU FRATERNIZING WITH **__**THEM EVER AGAIN! YOU ARE FORBIDDEN FROM GOING ANYWHERE NEAR THEM!"**_

The envelope collapsed into ashes.

Sirius would've given all the gold he owned to disappear.

The Slytherin table exploded in horrible laughter. Slowly, the babble of talking resumed throughout the Hall. Only Remus, James, Sirius, and Peter sat in complete silence.

Sirius couldn't meet his friends' eyes.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I'm so sorry. I hate myself."

He was out of the Hall like he'd been fired from a shot.

**A/N: Drama drama drama!**


	6. Of Blames, Apologies, and Worries

Chapter Six

Blame, Apologies, and Worries

Remus, Peter, and James found Sirius in their dorm, on his bed. He was just sitting there. He wasn't plotting, or mwahahahahaing, or doing anything else. He was just sitting, face buried in his hands, apparently deep in thought.

"Sirius, mate.." began James slowly.

Sirius shook his head. "I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry."

"Are you blaming yourself for this?" demanded Remus incredulously. "You're _blaming _yourself for _this?_"

"It's my fault," pointed Sirius out, finally dropping his hands.

"No, you idiot," hissed James, winging a pillow at his friend's face. "It is not _your _fault."

Sirius ran a hand through his hair. "I hate my mother," he said abruptly.

The three friends exchanged glances.

"You know, I have no objection at all to her insulting _me,_" he went on. "Really. I'm more than used to that. She's been insulting me since before I turned seven. I don't care anymore. But I hate it when she tries to insult the people I actually care about."

Peter, James, and Remus couldn't help but feel touched.

"Before I came here it was Andromeda." Sirius was still talking, more to himself than his friends. "She insults Meda every single opportunity she has, 'cause she knows that I love Meda and she knows that I don't want to see her hurt. And now she's following me at school. And it's through you guys. You guys, who are my absolute best friends and who I know you always will be. I wonder how she found out about that, anyway. I'm too far away to have her been using Legilicimy.."

James shuddered slightly. He couldn't imagine being Sirius. There were a million things he wanted to say; to ask. But all he could think to say that wouldn't hurt anyone was "Your mum uses _Legilicimy _on you?"

Sirius shrugged. "Yeah, sometimes. But whatever." He sighed. "I really am sorry, you guys. What she called you..what she said..especially you, Remus."

Remus quickly shook his head. "It's fine, Sirius. I don't mind."  
"Stop lying," said Sirius dryly. "You looked absolutely horrified.." He looked at James and Peter. "I mean, I'm really really really sorry for what.._ she _said to you guys, too. It's just.." He trailed off, but all four knew what he was talking about. They'd only known Remus for a few weeks, but they knew that he was shy and quite sensitive. They knew how hard he took insults.

And even if he wasn't, even if he didn't, Sirius's mother had basically called Remus's mother an animal and insulted his family to the hundredth degree.  
If he was to be completely honest, Remus was insulted. And hurt. (Well if he _completely _honest, he'd tell his friends certain things that'd make them run away screaming.) It was because of the animal comment more than anything. And that was because, well, he _was _an animal.

But he tried to put that out of his mind.

"I'm sorry," said Sirius again softly. "I'm sorry for what she said. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"Sirius," said James firmly, "_listen to me. _It. Was. Not. Your. Fault. It's not your fault you have a messed up family—" He stopped. "Sorry."

Sirius shook his head. "I _do _have a messed up family. Don't apologize."

"Same for you," Remus picked up. "Sirius, I'm not gonna lie any more." Remus felt a pang. He was lying. He was lying every second of the day. He was lying most of all when he was saying he wasn't lying. He hated it. "Look, I'm incredibly hurt by what your mother said to me, by what she said my mum, ah, is. But look. You three are the best friends I've ever had, ever. And I'm not going to kill my friendship because of a stupid Howler."

"Sirius?" spoke up Peter, so softly Sirius could barely hear him. "Are you going to listen to your mum? Are you gonna stop.._fraternizing _with us?"

Sirius looked shocked he would ask such a question. "Of _course _not, you idiot!" he cried. "I wouldn't leave you guys if you bloody _paid _me. Of course, Bellatrix will "report" to dear old Mum and she'll probably kill me, but you guys are the closest thing to family I've ever had, other than Meda."

There was silence after this remark.

"Sorry," said Peter in a small voice.

Sirius shook his head. "I'm the one who should be apologizing," he muttered.

"Can we _stop _with the apologies?" asked James, exasperated, but with a good natured grin.

Sirius smiled. "Definitely," he said, and the spring to his step was back as he jumped from his bed. "Gosh, I'm hungry. I didn't have a bite to eat at breakfast. I'm gonna go find something.."

As Sirius walked out of the room and Peter scrambled after him, James and Remus remained.

"I worry about him sometimes," admitted Remus, breaking the silence.

"Me too," mused James. "It really does hurt him, at least a little bit."

"He's braver than all of us put together."

James agreed immediately. "You'd kind of have to be, to grow up with the people he's growing up with."

"Yeah.." Remus seemed lost in thought.

"Well, we'd better go join them," James pointed out, jumping off of his bed. "They'll be wondering what we got up to."

**A/N: I'm really not that happy about this chapter...but I wrote it absolutely ages ago, and every time I try to take it out and replace it there's this big gaping hole where they're just okayish and then suddenly best friends..so..yeah. :) The next chapter will be entitled "Werewolf" which is more characterization then substance, but then there'll be more plot afterward. And then in couple chapter we'll have PRANKS. :)**


	7. Werewolf

Chapter Seven

Werewolf

Remus had never been happier. He had three amazing friends, was getting brilliant marks, and if it wasn't for the small inconvenience that he happened to be a werewolf, life would be perfect. Luckily, none of his friends appeared close to figuring out his Secret. There were, however, some close calls.

"James," said Remus in a voice of mocked amazement one day, "are you _reading?_"

James nodded. "Yeah, it's a really good book. It's called _To Kill a Werewolf._" He returned to his book, but looked up when he felt something was wrong. He saw Remus, positively frozen, face drained of all color.

"What's up?"

He answered in a voice that was attempting normalcy. And failing. Miserably. "Is it, ah, really a, er, a step-by-step guide on how to, ah, kill werewolves?"

James laughed. "No, you idiot. It's about creatures that are considered Dark, but it says how they're usually completely innocent, and it goes into loads of detail about how werewolves are completely human, they just accidentally turn into man-eating monsters once a month, and they're totally innocent and killing them is stupid."

Remus let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. Relief pumped through him. James didn't think werewolves were monsters. He thought they were normal.

But he had a feeling his ideas might change if he found out that he actually shared a dormitory with one.

"Why?" asked James curiously.

"No reason," mumbled Remus.

It wasn't until his second full moon, his October transformation, that they started to get a bit suspicious. The first one he had said that his aunt had died. They'd given him condolences and sent him on his way. He then proceeded to detour into the Hospital Wing.

The next time, though, was harder.

"Er, I'm not actually going to be here tomorrow," Remus nervously told his friends, who were outlining a vicious prank to play on the Slytherins, or more specifically, Narcissa, _Snivellus,_ and Bellatrix, which included the Slytherin common room common room, badgers, lots of red and gold, and piles of leprechaun gold. "I'm, er, going home for the day."

"And see, Bella's obsessed with gold but Narcissa is afraid of badgers, so we'll— wait, _what?" _Sirius cut himself off and looked at Remus. "But we've been planning this for weeks! And we can't delay it, because tomorrow is when the sun sets at 6:53, and the leprechauns can only be around when it does, and we can't rent them until bef –"

"I know," said Remus miserably, cutting Sirius off. "It's just, m-my, er, aunt. She died."

"Oh," said Sirius. "Er. Sorry."

"I thought she died last month," James couldn't help saying, frowning.

"Um, yeah. Aunt — Lynca. But Aunt Thropie died last week." Aunt Lynca, Aunt Thropie,_ could _he make it anymore obvious? Lycanthropy! Werewolfism! It was a complete and utter lie, of course. He didn't have any relatives except for his parents and a couple of second cousins and a great-great grandpa, none of whom knew his Secret. "Uh, yeah. Not sure how long I'll be gone. A day or two at least."

Sirius and James looked at each other. "Only a day or two?" repeated Sirius.

"Um, yeah," muttered Remus. "I'm leaving tonight. Better start packing, now that I think of it.."

He turned his back on his rather confused friends and began to throw random things into his trunk.

"Aren't you taking any black?" asked Sirius curiously.

"Black?"

"Yeah. I mean, that's what you're usually supposed to wear to a funeral." Out of the four of them, Sirius had been dragged to the most funerals, so Remus supposed he was right.

"Oh — yeah," he muttered, throwing a black suit in as well.

They'd find out. They weren't idiots.

Not Sirius and James, in any case.

Remus lay on the ground of the Shrieking Shack, covered from head to toe in gashes and deep bite marks, every inch of him aching.

"Remus? Are you..?" The mediwitch, Madam Pomfrey, was at the door, asking if he was a human. He couldn't bring himself to reply, because it would require moving his muscles, and they ached too much right now. He allowed a low moan to escape him.

She tentatively opened the door, and when she saw him lying on the floor, covered in injuries, she let out a sharp breath. The poor boy, the poor, poor boy..

She came in and began to heal him. It burned horribly, but Remus dare or bother not complain. When all his wounds were healed, he attempted to climb to his feet, but collapsed.

"It hurts," he mumbled, face going red. He was so weak..

Madam Pomfrey produced a potion. "Drink this," she told him. He swallowed the entire drink in one gulp, then shuddered with relief as the pain left him.

"I hate this," he said to himself as he carefully picked himself up from the ground. "Madam Pomfrey, what'll happen if someone — finds out?"

Madam Pomfrey's face went ashen. "_Did _anyone?"

"No," Remus assured her quickly. "It's just...what if?"

The matron sighed. "Don't think about that, Remus. Just...just don't. No one will find out."

Remus sighed. "Right."

But he knew, in the corner of his mind, that _some_how, his friends would work out his Secret.

**A/N: Again..short, not too happy with it, but necessary. The next two chapters will introduce two new characters who will play a large plot in the story.. cookies if you can guess who!**


	8. Evans and Andromeda

Chapter Eight

Evans and Andromeda

"James."

James looked up from the horrible stack of Potions homework that had piled up over the week. "Yeah?" It was a freezing cold Saturday in mid December. No one could wait for the seventeenth, on the coming Thursday, when term would end and winter break would begin.

Sirius smiled wickedly. "You," he announced, "_fancy _Lily Evans."  
James reddened considerably. "Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do NOT!"

"Do TOO!"

"DO NOT!"

"Well, then," said Sirius smugly, "how come you write — look, see, you're _writing '_L.E'on your Potions homework?"

"I am n—" James looked down at his paper. Apparently unconsciously, he had drawn those very initials all over it.

"Sirius, you spy," he growled.

"Hey," said Sirius, holding his arms up in innocence, "I was just trying to steal your Potions notes."

"Oh yes, a very excusable crime," came Remus's dry voice from the other side of the dormitory.

"I know!" cried Sirius, apparently unaware of the sarcasm. "I am not a spy! And," his smug look returned, "_James _likes_ Lily Evans. And _I can prove it. The first fight James _ever _got into with Snivellus? In the line for the Sorting?"

Remus got a rather uncharacteristically wicked glint into his eyes. "What was it about?"

"Noooo," yelled James. "It was just to annoy her — him! I swear it was! SHUT UP, SIRIUS!"

"It was about him calling Lily a fire-cat, which poor ole lovestruck James took as an insult! And then—" Sirius choked on his laughter "—she told him to stop and he said—"

"IT WAS TO BUG HER!" screamed James.

"_Anything you say, my dear Lily!_"

"AUUUUUGH," yelled James, leaping on top of Sirius and viciously tackling him. "It — was — to — _annoy — _her!"

Sirius was laughing so hard, it was a wonder he was still breathing. But come to that, Remus wasn't exactly crying. Actually, he was. Tears of glee were streaming down his face. Peter, a bit confused, was giggling nervously all the same.

James's face was blood red. "I do _not _fancy Evans!"

"Oh, you do _too,_" contradicted Sirius. "You looooove her."

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"DO NOT!"

"DO TOO!"

"Give it a rest, the both of you," sighed Remus at last as his tears subsided and his laughter ended. "James, it's obvious you like Evans, and we all know that, so leave him alone, all right Sirius?"

"But Remus," whined Sirius, mocking a pained expression, as James shook his head violently in protest, "what kind of a friend would I be if I didn't tease him thoroughly and completely for this?"

"You wouldn't agree to a very good one, would you?" replied Remus.

"Nope," answered Sirius cheerfully. "I, Remus, _am _a good friend. And it's written on page four hundred fifty one of the Good Friend handbooks. All friends must tease each other." He grinned. "The number of times I've told Andromeda that..especially when she started dating Ted Tonks. The Gryffindor Quidditch team captain? The Muggle born."

"Bet your mum wasn't too happy about that," commented Remus.

"Furious, so was my auntie," said Sirius happily. "Meda was delighted."

"I haven't met Andromeda yet, y'know," said James, silently thanking his luck that Sirius had become distracted.

Sirius's eyes widened. "What is this madness?" He jumped off his bed. "C'mon! We gotta go meet her."

"Sirius, it's Saturday!" protested Remus.

"We'll have no idea where she is!" pointed out Peter.

"There's only one place Andromeda ever is on Saturday," said Sirius. "The library. She'd get along real well with you, Rem. Nerdy thing."

"Oh, shut up," Remus said, but he was grinning and he got to his feet.

"She doesn't like her library, though," went on Sirius. "Or the one at our house. They're both full of dumb books that claim that Muggle borns and half bloods are completely below us and that we're kings and queens and they're not, total junk like that. And there're a couple ones that she says gives her nightmares — wimp," he added affectionately, "although they _are _creepy — full of Dark magic and torture spells and things like that, and this one she never, ever, ever looks at it, it's full of dangerous creatures like vampires and evil centaurs and werewolves and giant spiders called Aracoma — hey, are you all right?" he asked, noticing how white Remus had gone. He was pale as a sopping wet sheet of paper.

"Y-yeah," Remus mumbled, sitting down to steady himself. "I'm fine." He felt slightly dizzy with horror pulsing through him. He couldn't help asking, "So, Andromeda's afraid of werewolves, is she?"

Sirius shook his head. "Nahh, I've tried to tease her about that hundreds of times, but she swears she isn't, she's just afraid of _permanently _evil things, the way she sees it, werewolves are only dangerous twelve out of three hundred and sixty five days, whereas like, vampires and boggarts and acracmontula and things like that are _always _evil. She's terrified out of her wits of spiders," he added, a devilish grin on his face. "Once she saw the tiniest little piece of lint and ran away screaming. She never heard the end of that."

"Sirius, for all your going on about her, you're terribly mean to her," James said, grinning.

"Yeah, well, I make up for it," Sirius replied, also grinning. "This one time, I remember, I was..six, I think. She was eleven, and home for Christmas, and we— Bellatrix, Narcissa, Reggie, and I— were having a massive snowball fight, and then Bellatrix— she was twelve— found this wicked tiny spider that was somehow still alive, and she enlarged it and stuck it on to the snowball— using magic, the Ministry couldn't tell it was her, see, 'cuz my auntie was out— and she threw it at Andromeda, and oh, I will never forget her _scream. _And then she ran off, and who could blame her, I mean a spider basically hit her in the face, and I was _so mad _at Bella, because even _I _knew Meda is dead scared of spiders, and I wasn't older than five! So I picked up a rock and threw it at Bellatrix!" He grinned. "She still had the mark— right here." He touched his hand to right above his eyebrow. "Only _I _am allowed to tease Meda," he added in means of explanation and Remus's horrified, albeit a bit amused, glance.

"Well then," said James, "you're gonna drag us if we don't come along with you to see Andromeda, aren't you?"

"Yup," replied Sirius cheerfully.

"Let's go, then," sighed Remus. "I have been wanting to meet the ever famous Andromeda Black."

And the four set off towards the place they thought they'd never be forced to— the_ library._

XxX

"So this is the library," observed Sirius. "I've never been here."

"_Never?_" whispered Remus incredulously. "How can you _never _have come?"

"Why are you whispering, Remmy?" asked James in normal tone.

"The librarian—" began Remus, but he was cut off in seconds.

"_Keep your voice down!_" came a pinched sounding yell from the corner. "_No talking in the library!"_

"Is a bit strict," finished Remus. "She never seems to notice how much _she's _yelling..oh, whatever. Where's Andromeda, then, Sirius?"

"She'll be in the fiction section on weekdays," Sirius informed his friends, voice lowered to a whisper, "drowning her brains in romances. She says she has to, to clear her brain, but I think she just wants to spite her mum. _And _I think she's obsessed with them." He grinned. "On weekends, though, she'll be in the history section. Nerd..where's the history section, Remmy the Nerd?"

Remus glared at him. "Do_n't _call me that."

"Okay, Remmy the Nerd."

Remus rolled his eyes. "It's this way here," he sighed, leading his friends down the aisles, "just behind this shelf.." He lingered slightly. "You know," he said hesitantly, "I don't think Andromeda would like me very much.." What Sirius had said about her not liking Dark creatures _at all _simply wouldn't get out of his head.

"'Course she would, you idiot," said Sirius impatiently, "Andromeda'd like a werewolf if he was nice."

A feeling of warmth and relief washed over Remus. "Would she really?" he asked, hardly daring to believe that, completely without meaning to, Sirius had answered his wishes, _all _his wishes..

But wait..if Sirius had said that, was he implying that _he.._

"Would _you?_" he added, trying to keep his tone light.

"'_Course _I would," Sirius said impatiently. "And so would she. Werewolves are only monsters twelve out of three sixty five days; they're usually pretty decent the rest of the time. I already told you. Come _on,_" he whined, pushing past him, "I haven't seen Meda in _months.. _what _is _it with you and your _obsession _with werewolves?_"_

For a split second, Remus wanted to tell them his Secret, they wouldn't mind, they thought werewolves good and normal—

but no, Sirius would change his mind once he found out he actually shared a dormitory with one.

_ "_All right," said Remus, standing aside, dancing over the obsession question. Sirius stepped into the aisle, scanned it quickly, and when he finally saw who he was looking for— a tall, slim, dark brown haired girl, thumbing through the books. "_Meda!" _he cried.

Andromeda didn't have to turn around, only one person in the world called her Meda with that joy in his tone, and that was—

"Siiiiri," she drawled, turning and enveloping him in a hug, which he fought off quickly.

"Meda, Meda, I missed you," said Sirius as he was released, and James couldn't help but notice the slight shell he kept around him, the I'm-tough-I'm-not-hurt-by-anyone-or-anything, appeared to be melting away as he actually _admitted _to missing someone, admitted to someone except the four of them that he had a weakness. He'd only ever confided in them like that, and extremely rarely. "We were talking about you—"

"How can you _not _talk about me?" demanded Andromeda, swishing back her hair but amusement plaguing her eyes so the four knew she was kidding. James had an inkling of who Sirius most resembled in his family.

"—Well, we were actually talking about this girl James fancies—"

_"I do not fancy her!_" objected James forcefully. Andromeda laughed. James liked her laugh. It was sweet and high, but at the same time comfortable and relaxed.

"C'mon, you guys, let's sit down, then," said Andromeda, leading the four of them to her favorite circle of chairs near the fire. "Sirius, aren't you gonna introduce me to your friends?"

"I'm getting there," answered Sirius maddeningly. "And then, I _don't _know how, we got talking about _you — _oh, yeah, I was telling them how much I teased you about _Teddy.._" Sirius's eyes flickered with malice as an evil grin spread across his face.

Andromeda reddened. "Shut up."

"And _then,_" went on Sirius, "_James _said none of them had _ever _met you, and then it occurred me, that since the school year started, I haven't come to see you _once!_"

"Git," said Andromeda playfully, poking him in the shoulder. "I've wanted to see you like crazy, Si, but I've no idea where you'd be.."

"Well,you're _always _in the library," Sirius continued. "So I dragged my friends along, and for some reason Remus thought you wouldn't like him, which is stupid, because Remus is a nice guy. That's Remus," he added, pointing to Remus. "Lupin."

"Pleased to meet you," Remus said politely, shaking Andromeda's hand. Andromeda smiled, pleasantly surprised at the boy's gentlemanlyness.

"And you," she replied. She turned to Sirius. "I like him," she proclaimed, and Remus flushed a happy pink.

"That's James," Sirius pointed out. James grinned. "Potter," Sirius added.

"We haven't stopped hearing about you since September, and that's three consecutive months now, we're getting a bit tired of it," James joked.

"Yeah, well," said Andromeda, a grin sliding over her face, "I doubt I'll hear the end of you three all summer!"

James grinned. He turned to Sirius. "I like her," he proclaimed.

Andromeda smiled. "I like him," she told Sirius.

"Good," said Sirius, pleased. "And this, Meda, this here, is Peter Pettigrew." He pointed.

She looked carefully at Peter, scouring his face. He backed away nervously.

_I don't trust him_ was the first thought that came to Andromeda's mind. Through all the years she'd spent in her family, Andromeda had learned to be a fantastically good judge of character. Something about Pettigrew, something about the way his eyes darted around, told Andromeda that he wasn't to be trusted.

She was too polite to say this to his face, though. She forced a smile on her face. ''I like him," she lied through her teeth. "Yes. Like him loads. Mm-hm. Yup." _I can't lie for my life, _she thought sadly.

_Oh, well, Sirius buys anything I say._

"So tell me about school," she demanded, trying to put Pettigrew out of her mind.

"Meda," complained Sirius, "what is there to tell about _school?_"

Andromeda laughed, eyes twinkling as she leaned forward. "Because," she said forcefully, "I want to know how hard the teachers have been working you, because not one single prank has been played all year! And it's been_ months! _What happened to the Sirius who put newts in Bella's bed just to hear her scream?"

Remus, James, and Peter laughed. "You never told me about that," grumbled James.

Sirius laughed too. "Well, Meda," he said, "you're right, I haven't played any pranks. I mean, I've thought of about a thousand, but they all involve four people, and whenever I get it all planned out, Remus goes and disappears!"

"Disappears?" repeated Andromeda, as Remus turned red.

"My mum, has, erm,.." Remus scoured his mind— what lie had he made up for last and this month's transformation? Oh, yes.. "My mum has terminal illness," he said, trying to look sad.

"I'm sorry," Andromeda kindly said.

Sirius looked slightly ashamed of himself. "Sorry," he said quickly.

"It's fine," answered Remus, looking slightly abashed. Sirius barely ever apologized for anything. Of course, if he genuinely hurt one of them, he'd look at his boots and mutter a _"didn't mean it." _or something of the like. Remus had no memory of Sirius actually looking him in the eye and saying _sorry._

Andromeda seemed to bring out the best in him.

"So tell me," Andromeda broke the silence, "about your Christmas plans."

"I doubt Mum'd want me home," said Sirius, smile flickering somewhat.  
"Probably not," agreed Andromeda flatly, knowing that not even Sirius would be thick enough to believe her if she denied it. "I'm staying here, too."

"Meda wants to spend Christmas with _Teddy,_" Sirius told his friends knowledgeably, a grin spidering across his face. They nodded knowingly, identical smiles across their own faces.

Andromeda blushed a brilliant scarlet. She reached out and swatted Sirius on the arm.

"_Anyways,_" she said significantly. "How about you, James?"

"I'm not sure yet," James replied. "I might stay here, because my cousin Serena, in –hey, she'd be in the year just below you, Andromeda, and in your house too— Serena Mildred Tole? She's my mum's sister's daughter."

"Yeah, I know Serena," recalled Andromeda. "I like her."

"She told me Hogwarts get _magical _at Christmas."

Sirius burst into quiet laughter. "It _is _magical," he reminded James.

James swatted Sirius. "You know what I mean."

Sirius assumed an injured look. "Everyone's hitting me today," he complained.

Remus swatted him. "For good measure," he explained, grinning.

"How about you, then, Remus?" asked Andromeda. "You going or staying?"

Remus hesitated. "It depends," he said thoughtfully. "I mean, I want to stay here, but Mum might want me back, so..I'm not.. sure.."

The five whiled away the hours, talking until six. James, Remus, and Peter automatically stood up as the dinner bell rang. Sirius hung back hesitantly.

"Si," said Andromeda, "I needa talk to you. In private." Sirius looked at his friends.

"You guys on ahead," he told his friends. They nodded and headed off. Andromeda went close to Sirius and spoke quickly.

"Sirius. _I don't trust Peter._"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Meda, Pete's one of my best friends."

"I know he is. But I'm just telling you to watch out. Don't entrust him with anything precious. All right?"

"And—"

"Sirius, just _trust me!_"

Sirius laughed. "All right, Andromeda. Whatever."

"Give me your word that you'll be _careful!_"

Sirius shook his head. "Andromeda, you're overreacting."

"Sirius! Your word."

Sirius heaved a sigh. "All right, Meda, I give you my word I'll be careful."

"Good," said Meda, the bounce returning to her step. "C'mon, I'll walk you down to dinner. Maryna won't mind if I talk to my cousins for one day."

"Who's Maryna?"

"Ted's sis – ah, my best friend."

Sirius laughed evilly.

XxX

Years later, in a cell in Azkaban, Sirius screamed with bitter laughter.

If only he'd used his brain.

If only he didn't switch.

If only he kept his word to Andromeda.

** A/N: Alas, I have not fallen off the face of the earth, I've just been incredibly busy. Updates will be few and far between, but I'll try to construct a regular schedule. Also I'm really not that proud of this chapter or the next one either, I find it kind of dumb. Review and tell me if it is.**


	9. Upbringing

Chapter Nine  
Upbringing

"Honestly, James," said Sirius, stalking into the dormitory the next Monday evening, dumping his bag on the floor, and leaning against the door frame, "what do you _see _in Evans? She's such a..swot."

"A, I don't see _anything _in her, and 2, she's not a swot," replied James.

"1, yes you do, B, yes she is," Sirius answered, a grin spidering over his face. "She's so..so good at Potions."

"And your point _is?_" demanded James.

"I'm not," explained Sirius. "Why do you fancy a girl whose better at anything than me? You shouldn't like anyone who can do anything better than me."

James rolled his eyes. "First of all, if I couldn't fancy a girl who did something better than you, I couldn't fancy _anyone, _and second of all, I do _not _fancy her."

"Ignoring your first comment. You do too."

"Do _not_!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do..." Sirius grinned. "Do not!"

"Do _too!_" yelled James. Sirius and Remus dissolved in laughter (and Peter tried to figure out what was going on) as James realized what he said. "Do not, not, NOT!" he backtracked.

"Just admit it, James," laughed Sirius. "You're..what's the word? _Smitten._"

"I AM NOT," yelled James, burning a fiery red.

"Yes you are," insisted Sirius. "And there's no point denying it! C'mon, she's not _that _bad."

"You just said she's a swot," James reminded Sirius. "And I do _not _fancy her. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.."

"I don't have any _objection _to her, exactly," said Sirius as James continued to "no, no, no, no, no, no.." "She bugs me, but I don't have much against her. I don't even mind that she's a Mudblood, or that she's best friends with _Snivellus _of all people, ugh, or even that Slughorn seems to like h – " Sirius stopped. "What?"

Remus had stopped laughing and James had stopped protesting. A dead silence had fallen in the room.

His friends were glaring at him. Remus looked horrified, James looked furious and even Peter was staring at him in shock.

James strode over to where Sirius stood, looked him in the eye, and pointed his wand. "Say that again, Black, I dare you," he growled.

"What?" cried Sirius, genuinely bewildered, more because of the random usage of his last name than anything else. "What did I do? What did I say?"

This only further enraged James. He threw his wand aside and – POW!

"_What was that for?" _Sirius shouted, rubbing his nose where James had punched him.

"You called Lily a – " James mouthed wordlessly, like a fish out of water. Once again, he drew his arm back and moved to punch him. Sirius, stronger and more agile, caught his fist in midair and yelled,

"WHAT IS SO BAD ABOUT THE WORD MUDBLOOD?"

There was a ringing silence.

"You don't..er.. know?" asked James, almost sheepishly.

"Not all," replied Sirius angrily. "We use it all the time at h–12 Grimmauld!"

There was another silence.

"Well, that explains it," said Remus softly.

"Sorry, mate," said James quietly. "I thought you knew.."

"Knew _what?_" cried Sirius.

"Not your fault, of course," agreed Remus. "To be brought up where you were.."

"CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON?" yelled Sirius, ready to tear out his hair in frustration.

"Sirius," James began, sitting his friend down, "it's..the word Mudblood is..it's a.."

"A repulsive thing to call someone," supplied Remus quietly, "created in medieval times at the beginning of Hogwarts when Salazar Slytherin thought that only "pure" wizards with two parents and four grandparents that were wizards/witches were "real" wizards, and those who weren't should not be accepted in Hogwarts. He called those who had Muggle parents, or even grandparents, unclean, dirty even. Hence, _Mud_blood." Remus paused, caught his breath, then continued. "Although at first used broadly enough, both for half-bloods and for Muggle-borns, it is now only used for Muggle-borns, for the most part. It is an extremely offensive term, basically implying that your blood is dirty, impure, wrong. That _you _are dirty, impure, wrong."

No one commented on Remus's remarkable ability to sound like he'd swallowed an encyclopedia.

Sirius sucked in his breath. "I'm sorry," he moaned. "I didn't know..it was my..what do they call it? _Upbringing._"

"You haven't had the best upbringing," said Remus softly.

"No, I haven't," agreed Sirius sadly. "Oh, man, I'm such an idiot. I'm sorry, I should've known..it should've been obvious.._mud_blood..I'm _such _an _idiot.._I'm sorry.."

"'Sokay, Sirius," said James, patting his friend on the arm. "It's not your fault. It was your.. upbringing."

"I wish I could just rewind," mused Sirius. "And get another childhood. One where I had good upbringing."

"We'll fix you," ventured Peter.

His friends laughed, but gently. James agreed. "Yeah. We'll..fix you. We'll give you another upbringing."

** A/N: This chapter is, okay, a little pointless, I just really wanted to do it. I like ****it, personally, but that's just me.  
**


	10. The Marauders

Chapter Ten

The Marauders

The next morning at breakfast, no one except his friends knew why Sirius couldn't quite meet Lily's eyes. Uncharacteristically, he was almost glad when post came, as it served as a distraction, almost, from Lily, who he'd called such a horrible name, sitting across from him.

He was expecting nothing, of course. In fact, he was praying for nothing. Ever since he'd gotten himself two Howlers in September, he'd learned well enough to hope with every ounce of him that no letter landed on his plate.

"I got a letter," said James happily, ripping it open. He read it aloud to his friends.

"_Dear James,_" he read. "_Hope you're having a wonderful time at Hogwarts. Just wanted to let you know that you don't have to come home for Christmas break if you don't want to. Hogwarts can get wonderful this time of year. It's your choice. Please write to us telling your decision by at most, the day before your break begins. Love always, Mum and Dad." _He beamed.

"Well?" asked Remus. "What're you going to do?"

James looked thoughtful. "I really don't know yet," he mused. "I have till tomorrow."

Sirius groaned.

"What?" asked Remus, as he, James, and Peter turned to look at their friend.

"I got a letter," Sirius answered darkly, watching his family owl fly off as if he wished murder on him. He probably did.

"At least it's not a Howler this time," pointed out James.

"Yeah, I guess," sighed Sirius. "I doubt it'll contain Christmas greetings, though.." He tore it open and read it.

James hoped with all his might that Sirius's mother had a brain lapse, or something, and realized her deep love and affection for her eldest son and heir.

Sirius sighed deeply.

"Glad my mum cares for me so much," he said quietly, drumming his fingers on the table.

_So much for that idea, _thought James glumly.

"Here, you guys can read it.." Sirius pushed the letter towards them. They leaned over it.

_To Sirius_:(the letter went.)

_We hope you do not plan on returning to 12 Grimmauld Place over your winter holidays. You are certainly not welcome here. The same goes for Easter break, and any other break you may have, excepting summer. Unfortunately, we will have to take you then._

_ -Your mother and father._

_ (PostScript: Regulus would like to add a wish that you have a merry Christmas.)_

James couldn't help but wonder, for the hundredth time, how anyone could treat _their own son _like Sirius was routinely treated. He looked up at Sirius, not quite sure what to say.

"Well," sighed Sirius, "I didn't except much else, I s'pose.. I just thought.. maybe.." He sighed again. "I guess I'm lucky she didn't tell me via Howler."

James was scribbling on a piece of parchment.

"What are _you_ writing?" demanded Sirius, slightly annoyed.

James finished the letter with a flourish and showed it to his friends.

_Dear Mum and Dad, (_the letter went_)_

_ Sorry, but I've decided to stay at Hogwarts this break. My friends need me here. Love you heaps and all that!_

_ Merry Christmas,_

_ -James_

Sirius looked up, more than a bit touched. "You don't have to.." he muttered. "I'll be fine on my own.."

James shrugged. "I don't mind, Sirius, I've always wanted to see what it'd be like here at Christmas." He grinned.

"Well," said Remus, in a concluding sort of tone, "that settles it, I'll be staying too."

All eyes went to Peter. He was wringing his hands gently, looking quite worried.

"How 'bout you, Pete?" said James easily.

"I'm..I'm.." Peter took a deep breath. "Ireallywannagohome," he mumbled quickly. He flushed. "I..I really miss.. my Mum and Dad.."

"That's all right," said Sirius, Remus, and James in unison.

Relief was apparent on Peter's face. He jumped from the table. "We'd better get to class, then," he said, and hurried off.

"Run home to Mummy and Daddy," muttered Sirius. Remus and James looked at him, surprised.

Sirius shrugged. "Have you ever got the feeling that something about Peter is..I dunno.._off?_"

Remus and James exchanged glances. "Look, Sirius, the guy misses his family.." began Remus.

Sirius shook his head. "It's not just that," he muttered. "I dunno, it seems..Meda says...y'know what, just forget it, aright? _Speaking of Meda," _he added significantly, an evil gleam in his eye, "I haven't forgotten what she said..we haven't played a single prank yet..and I want a massive one before everyone goes home for Christmas break!" He glanced at Remus. "Uh, you're not gonna disappear anymore..?"

"Uh, no," Remus said quickly.

"Awesome," said Sirius happily. "All right, then, prank. I have this great idea about _graffiti _and _the Potions room.._"

"_What?_"

"Meet tonight in my dorm," was all Sirius said. "Better get to class..." He darted off.

Remus and James looked at each other.

"He doesn't remember that we share a dorm, does he?"'

"I don't think so.."

XxX

"Are we all here?" asked Sirius furtively that night. "Great, great.."

"Sirius, we're _always _here," reminded Remus. "We share a dorm. Remember?"

"Whatever," said Sirius dismissively. "Anyways. Getting to the point. Who here actually _likes _Slughorn?"

"I do," said Peter timidly.

Everyone glared at him.

"You are _so wrong, _Pete," said Sirius menacingly. "_So wrong!_"

"I.._don't,_" he said quickly.

"Good," said Sirius happily. "I _hate _him, he's always going on about how _wonderful _my _cousin _and my _cousin _and my _other cousin _and my _great grandfather twice removed _is. And what a _shame, _that I was in _Gryffindor, _and oh lord, I _hate him.._"

"Evans likes him," volunteered James.

Sirius glared at him. James wasn't, however, as easily fazed as Peter. "Well, she does!"

"I hate Evans, then," sad Sirius dismissively. James punched him.

"Defendant much?" groaned Sirius, clutching his shoulder. "And yet you_ still _say you don't fancy her.."

"No, I am," said James sternly. "I mean, yes, I'm not. I mean, I am, but I'm not – oh, _I am not defendant of her!"_

Sirius and Remus (but not Peter, who was confused) exploded in laughter.

"ANYWAYS," yelled James. "I _hate _Slughorn."

"Me, too," muttered Remus, but he didn't say why. While the class was learning about various potions that tamed wild creatures, Slughorn rather snidely put in how there was no such potion for the werewolves, and werewolves were horrible creatures that were better put to death then be allowed to remain alive and "contaminate" other innocent humans. Remus considered this unnecessary, especially as he _knew_ he was _teaching _a werewolf at that present point in time.

But they didn't have to know that.

"Yes," said Peter timidly. "Hate him. Yeah. Hate him. Hate him loads. I hate him so much – "

"We get it, Pete," said Sirius, somewhat irately. Peter flushed purple. "Anyway, once Meda brought home this Muggle thing called a move-e. It's basically like watching moving pictures move and interact in a storyline. It was called _Gangstas with Graffiti –_"

Remus and James exploded with laughter. "What a creative title," gasped Remus. "_Gangstas.. _oh, God, that's hilarious.."

"And it turns out," Sirius went on, ignoring his friends, "that there's this thing called _graffiti, _where basically you spray big puffy letters with spray paint on random walls to bug policemen. And since we all hate ole Sluggy, I thought we could bug _him!'"_

"By spraying big puffy letters on his walls with spray paint?" said Remus faintly.

Sirius waved his hand. "No, silly!"

Remus breathed a sigh of relief.

"We're gonna use _magic _paint!"

Remus banged his head on the wall. "Why? WHY? W_hy _am I cursed with friends who are so clearly deranged?" he screamed.

James patted his shoulder. "Not cursed, Remmy," he said consolingly. "Blessed."

XxX

The next morning, Remus had finally been convinced to go along with their scheme, and Peter had finally figured out exactly what was going on.

Well, not _exactly._

He'd gotten the gist of it. That was, in truth, more than James and Sirius actually hoped for.

The boys sneaked down to the Potions dungeon extremely early. Since all four of them had Potions first, this was not unheard of.

"_Hello, boys!"_

They all jumped. Only Sirius remained cool. They had a plan, after all, and he was armed with years of experience. "Hello, Professor," he said evenly.

"Sirius, m'boy!" boomed Slughorn. "You know, I wanted to invite you to a Christmas party I was having..very exclusive, just the Slug Club and you can bring.._one _guest..within reason.." Remus flinched as Slughorn's eyes swept his patched robes. "Your wonderful cousins will be there, _lovely _Bellatrix and _darling _Narcissa..not Andromeda, though, she's a bit of a downer..I've said it before and I'll say it again, boy, such a _shame _you weren't in Slytherin.."

James saw Sirius put his hand in his pocket and tighten his fingers. James gave him a warning poke. Sirius relaxed his fist slightly, but James could see he was still holding his wand. He nudged Remus. It was time for the distraction they'd planned.

"Um, Professor Slughorn?" Remus stumbled slightly over his words, but remained composed enough.

"_And _your grandfather, oh, lovely chap, Mr. Phineas – er, yes, Mr., er.."

"Lupin, Professor. Er, I remember you telling me that you knew, uh, To – Tompas – Rop – "

"_Ropple Tommerspos," _James hissed in Remus's ear.

"Ropple Tommerpos, and, for, for Defense Against the Dark Arts I'm doing a, a report on him – "

James wondered how Remus could be so cool and composed and polite around other teachers, even the scary ones, and be completely clumsy and stumbling and _stupid _around Slughorn.

"Yes, and I wanted to know how he was when you were teaching him.." Remus finished.

"I've got a file on him in my office!" boomed Slughorn. "I'll go get it..just be a moment.."

As he hurried out of the room, the four boys slapped twenty.

"He won't be back for _hours,_" said Sirius delightedly. "You know how he gets. He'll see one old file and he'll take twenty five hours reminiscing...and if it's one of my family, all the better for us.._what _does he see in them, I haven't the slightest idea.."

"Let's get to work!" exclaimed James. He rubbed his wand experimentally, pointed it towards the wall, and began to say "_Paintus Perma–"_

_ "_Hold it!" exclaimed Remus, thrusting out an arm. "We are overlooking one very important detail. Slughorn will _know _that it was us doing it because we were the last people in his office!"

"Slughorn loves me," said Sirius confidently. "He'd never accuse me of anything. _But, _if you're really worried, I can get Meda to head him off in someway, make up a fake story about how she's looking for us but she last saw us fast asleep in our dormitory.."

"Isn't Andromeda normally pretty busy?" said James dubiously.

"Yeah, but the girl loves pranks," said Sirius dismissively. "And lessons don't start for.." He checked his watch. "An hour and a half."

"You don't know where she is," pointed out Peter.

"The library," Sirius said automatically. "It's a rather annoying habit of her's, waking up at six thirty and going down to read. I'll be back in a few minutes. You guys start, though. And if Slughorn comes, just say _invisicoursos tpoal SLUGHORN _and sweep your wand over yourselves."

"_What?_"

"Just do it," Sirius said, and ran off.

James, Remus, and Peter exchanged careful looks. "I'll start," said James bravely. He raised his wand. "_Paintus Permanentusi," _he muttered, and the top of the wand turned bright green.

"Slughorn.." began James, concentrating hard and moving his wand on the wall just above Slughorn's desk. "..Is..a.." The words he dictated appeared carefully on the wall, in puffy green writing. It looked remarkably like side-of-the-road graffiti. "..Slimy.."

"James, you can't write _that!"_

"Yes, I can too, Remus," said James smugly. ".._Git. _There!" He beamed. "It lookswonderful. You next!"

Remus swallowed. "O..okay," he agreed, wondering inwardly if something was seriously wrong with him. He stepped towards the blackboard.

"What should I write?" he wondered aloud.

"How about something dissing the Slytherins?" James suggested.

"All right," Remus reluctantly agreed. "Slytherins..are...slimy," he began slowly, and the words began to etch themselves upon the wall. "G..r..y..f...f..i..n..d..o..r...s... are.. better." He smiled.

"Doesn't it feel good to get back at ole Sluggy?" exclaimed James, clopping his friend on the back.

For the next five minutes, the two took turns writing hateful message to Slughorn and Slytherins in general. Peter, predictably, was too scared to at first, but he joined in in the end, and wrote some clever remark.

Suddenly, the door began to creak open.

"Hurry, hurry," whispered Remus frantically. "What was it.."

"_Invisicoursos tpoal SLUGHORN,_" recited James quickly, sweeping his wand over himself, Peter, and Remus. Nothing seemed to have happened. The friends looked at each other desperately.

" – Yes, Andromeda, just a _moment,_" said Slughorn impatiently, coming into the room. "Those boys..where _are _they..?"

Andromeda came into the room. To their shock, Sirius was right behind her. Slughorn did not seem to notice him anymore then he noticed the graffiti on the wall – in other words, not at all.

"I'm serious, Professor, they were just in the library," Andromeda was insisting. "I was just .. looking for them.. – "

"Now, now, Drom, wait just a moment!" said Slughorn heartily. Andromeda grimaced behind his back. She obviously did not like being called Drom.

"Boys? Boys? Remus? I have the file.." Slughorn looked around. He looked directly at the graffiti and directly at the boys. They held their breath.

"..Well, I suppose you're right, Drom.."

"Yes, Professor, they were in the library," Andromeda assured him. "You know how eleven year olds can be, Professor, attention spans the size of ants."  
"Better get back to my office," sighed Slughorn. "Lessons don't start for an hour, do they?" He yawned and left.

"It's clear, guys," Andromeda said, lips twitching.

"Awesome," said Sirius. "_Finite incantatem!"_

Nothing seemed to happen.

"That spell," Sirius began before his friends could, "blocks you and whatever you need to – from the vision of only the person whose name was stated."

Remus looked startled. "Is that _you _talking, Sirius? Where did you _learn _it?"

Sirius grinned and poked Andromeda. "Oh, a girl named..Drom."

Andromeda swatted him. "Do _not _call me that," she warned. "Or else you will be getting _no _visits from me over the summer."

"..Andromeda?"

"Yes, my dear cousin?"

"You do know if you don't visit me at least twenty times over the summer, I'll kill you?"

Amusement plagued Andromeda's eyes. "And if I told you that I plan to spend the entire summer with Ted, abroad in France, what would your answer be?"

"My answer would be this. You. Are. Dead."

"Well, I'd better start building my coffin." Sirius's face fell. "I'm kidding – kidding!" She looked around the room and burst into laughter.

"You guys," she gasped, "covered the Potions room..with..._graffiti?"_

"Shush," Sirius ordered. She petered off into little giggles.

"It's definitely one of your more _inventive _pranks.."

"Hang on, I haven't done my part yet," replied Sirius. "Although you guys did brilliance," he added. "Hang on, though.."

He picked up his wand, recited the charm, and began to thoroughly spoil the walls of the Potions room. He wrote all kinds of things, from obviously rude words in German ("His mother made him take it one summer," explained Andromeda to a baffled Remus, James, and Peter) to exactly what he thought about Slughorn (it wasn't exactly very nice) to absolutely random sayings to, in a flourishing finish, big green polka dots surrounding the room.

"It's fabulous," breathed James, as if surveying a great work of art. Well, in his eyes, he was. "It's _amazing..."_

He began to wring Andromeda's hand. "You taught him this," he breathed. "You are a master. A _master. _Teach me your secrets! TEACH ME YOUR SECRETS, I BEG OF YOU!"

Andromeda burst into laughter. "You choose your friends _very _well," she told Sirius.

"We better scram before Slughorn realizes that none of you idiots would come close to the library," Remus said, an impish grin dancing around his lips. Andromeda laughed loudly.

"You choose your friends _very _well, Sirius," she repeated.

"We need to sign it somehow," said Sirius absently.

"With our _names?_" said Remus faintly. He looked terrified at the prospect.

"No, you idiot," said Sirius dismissively. "We need a title, the four of us..some title..like the Awesomes.."

"No, Sirius, we are _not _calling ourselves the Awesomes," said James warningly. "Why _not?_" whined Sirius.

"_Because._ We need a really brilliant name. Like..the Mischievous Four."

"I like that," said Remus absently, "but it's kinda cliche.."

"How about the Marauders?" said Peter in a tiny voice.

Everyone looked at him. He paled. "N-never mind.."

"Nooo, I _love _it!" cried James.

"It's _awesome!"_

_ "Totally, _Peter."

"Where'd you _hear _it?" demanded Remus, looking enthralled.

"McGonagall said it this one time," mumbled Peter, flushing pink.

"I LOVE it," said Sirius happily. He pointed to the ceiling and wrote, in much neater, smaller writing:

LOVE FROM THE MARAUDERS.

"Love from?" repeated James.

"Yes," said Sirius happily.

Remus's eyes were wandering the graffitied walls. He marveled inwardly at it, and also wondered slightly if he'd lost his mind. His heart leaped when he saw the word WEREWOLF. He rescanned the wall, looking for it..

there it was, in medium sized letters:

WEREWOLVEZ R KEWL!

Yes, he'd definitely lost his mind.

But it was in a good place.

XxX

That morning at breakfast, Slughorn came racing in, hat askew, looking thoroughly infuriated.

"VANDALIZED!" he yelled. "THE POTIONS ROOM! GRAFFITIED!"

The newly christened Marauders fixed their eyes on their respective breakfasts – Peter, lumpy porridge, Sirius, french toast, Remus, plain toast, James, eggs and bacon – and insanely willed themselves not to laugh. Across the hall, Ted Tonks tried hard to figure out why his girlfriend was in wild hysterics.

Slughorn reached Dumbledore in two strides. "DUMBLEDORE, THE POTIONS ROOM IS _VANDALIZED_! THERE IS PAINT ALL OVER IT! INSULTING ME! AND PUREBLOODS! AND IT IS SIGNED_ LOVE FROM THE MARAUDERS!" _he shrieked.

Dumbledore's lips twitched. His eyes twinkled and seemed to glance briefly Remus, James, Peter, and Sirius (who promptly pulled on mostly convincing 'who-us-never!' looks) before snapping back to Slughorn.

"There, there, Horace," he said soothingly. "Paint? I'm sure it'll wash out. Why, Professor McGonagall has a handy little spell..Minerva, if you would.."

"WHO ARE THE MARAUDERS?" Slughorn positively screamed. "I WANT TO SEE SOME _PUNISHMENT!"_

"I daresay the Marauders are a handful of bored students, and I'd guess they do not want to be found," said McGonagall crisply. A hint of amusement seemed to be in her tone of voice, not that she was amused, oh no, Minerva McGonagall would never take amusement in the pain of her fellow staff members. "But we will try to track them down.. and Horace, come on, let's get to removing that paint."

The four slapped five.

"We did it," said James.

"We successfully pulled off our first prank," said Remus, sounding and feeling strangely pleased.

"Of course, they'll be more!" insisted James.

"Course," agreed Remus, wondering slightly in ninjas had captured his brain..then deciding he didn't care.

"We're awesome," proclaimed Sirius.

And they all agreed.

* * *

**A/N: Oh, dear, has it really been two months? I'm sorry, I've been swamped. I have, however, written up to chapter thirty eight in this story, so you might be able to expect some stuff up sooner than later. :P Review! Pretty Please?**


	11. The Last Day of Term

Chapter Eleven  
Last Day of Term

"Merry early Christmas, guys," yawned Remus, dropping into a chair at the Great Hall. "You're leaving this evening, Peter?"

Peter swallowed a mouthful of eggs as Remus helped himself to jam, which he methodically applied to his bread. "Yeah," he said happily. "I can't wait. I really miss Mum and Dad."

"Of _course _you do," said Sirius under his breath, but only James heard him. He frowned at Sirius. Sirius lowered his eyes.

"Well," said James, breaking the temporary silence. "Last day of term." Sirius sighed in contentment.

"_Finally, _past few months have been taking _forever.._"

There was a great swooping sound as hundreds of owls rained down upon the Great Hall. Each of the Marauders got a letter.

"What does yours say?" asked Sirius after he read his. He slammed it back on to the table with unnecessary force.

Remus and James shared a look before mutely deciding honesty would be best. "Christmas wishes," said Remus quietly.

"Yeah," agreed James, "same here."

"Mum wanted to remind me that I was coming home," said Peter in a small voice.

"Great for you three, then," said Sirius sourly, turning back to his eggs.

"Sirius?" said James after a moment.

"What?"

"Forgive me for asking, but what does your letter say?" James ventured. He rather felt that Sirius was waiting for them to ask him, so he could – quite righteously – complain to someone.

Sirius set down his orange juice so hard it splashed onto the table. "The opposite of what Peter's does," he said angrily, but his anger was quite obviously not directed at his friends.

A few minutes passed in silence, before Sirius sighed and said "C'mon, we'd best get to Potions." He picked up his bag and strode off. His friends quickly caught up with him, but they walked to the dungeons in silence.

It was only a few minutes into the lesson when Slughorn began his usual act.

"Going home for Christmas, then, m'boy?" he said to Sirius. Sirius carefully avoided his eye, crushing his boomslang in with unnecessary force.

"Depends on what you mean by "home,"" said Sirius carefully, finishing his boomslang and tipping it into a bowl. James saw his hands were shaking slightly.

Slughorn looked a bit taken aback. "Er – _home, _m'boy! _Your_ home!"

"_Hogwarts _is my home," said Sirius coldly. "I _live _at 12 Grimmauld Place, but that is not my home anymore and it never will be. And yes, I plan to stay here, I'm staying home."

Slughorn looked extremely confused, but apparently decided to let it go. "What a shame," he said heartily. "I'd've liked you to say hello to dear old Bellatrix for me – she dropped Potions this year, it's amazing, I'm her head of house but I barely see the girl! Such a shame, such a _shame.._yes, I do wish you were going home.."

_"Gah!"_ Sirius had accidentally cut his hand with the knife and blood was slowly trickling out. This may or not have been the result of his very shaking hands.

"Oh, there – '' Slughorn raised his wand to close the cut, but Remus had already muttered a spell and the it had healed itself.

"Professor Slughorn, I think Snape needs some help over there," said Remus quietly, pointing across the room to not much of anything. Slughorn bought it, though, and walked off.

"Thanks," said Sirius quietly. "I really could not take another second of him carrying on like that. It was making me _crazy._"

"Same here," said Remus bitterly. "I can't _stand _him..I don't even feel bad about graffiting his room anymore, you know."

The four of them smiled. Above them was one bit of magic that not even McGonagall had been able to erase..the words _LOVE, THE MARAUDERS._

_

* * *

_

Only a short bit later, Slughorn was back.

"Shoot," said Sirius under his breath. "The _slug's _back.."

"I told you a few days ago, Sirius," the _slug _was saying. "I'm having a little party tonight, nothing big, just get together, you know? I'd very much like you to come."

"No thank you," said Sirius, trying to stay polite.

"I insist!" cried Slughorn. "Why, you can even bring guests! One, at least..within..er..reason.." His eyes flickered to Remus's patched, shabby robes, then his secondhand cauldron. Remus cringed.

"What do you mean by _within reason?_" said Sirius suspiciously.

"Well.." Slughorn hesitated, then lowered his voice slightly. "_Appropriate_ guests, you know. Think of who your _wonderful _old mother would like you to invite, eh?" He patted Sirius on the head and walked off before he could retaliate

After Slughorn was out of earshot, Sirius burst. "Someone my _mother _would like? He has _got _to be kidding me! That leaves..hm, let's think.. _no one!_"

Remus was stirring his potion more vigorously than absolutely necessary. "God, I hate him," he said quietly.

"He's horrible," said James quietly. "But cheer up, guys..it's nearly Christmas!"

Sirius's scowl deepened, and Remus didn't answer. James sighed.

Stupid Slughorn.

In the back furrows of his evil mind, Christmas pranks began to weave together..

* * *

**A/N: So, sadness and drama. But! But but but! As you may be able to see...pranks are coming up. Yay!**


	12. Nickname

Chapter Twelve

Nicknames

That evening, the four Marauders walked together to the train station to see Peter off. Light snow was falling, to their glee, and the ground was powdered with white.

"Have a great holiday, Peter," said Remus, smiling.

"Yeah, have a fantastic one," said James.

"Hope you get loadsa gifts," said Sirius cheerfully. "Merry Christmas!"  
Peter grinned. "Thanks, you guys! 'Bye!" He jumped onto the train and scrambled to find a compartment.

The threesome waited until the train had screamed and chugged away. Sirius watched, satisfied.

"Does anyone else feel slightly less burdened now that Pete's gone?" he asked.

Remus and James exchanged looks. "_What _have you got against the dude?" demanded Remus, exasperated but amused despite himself.

Sirius shrugged. "He's so..I dunno, annoying isn't exactly the word. C'mon, let's head back to the castle."

There was slightly more spring in his step as he walked off.

"All the people who annoy me," he explained when Remus and James had caught up with him, "are gone."

"Like?" said Remus.

Sirius ticked off on his fingers. "Peter – sorry, but it's true. The whole lot of my family except Andromeda, especially Cissy and Bella. Snivellus." He sighed in contentment. "They're all gone. Except for Evans. She's staying, I heard her tell Marlene."

"Why does Evans bother you?" said James, looking injured.

"Oh sorry, I forgot YOU FANCY HER!" said Sirius cheerfully.

"I _do not!" _insisted James, going verrrrry red. "And shut up!"

"But you _do _fancy her," insisted Sirius evilly.

"I DO NOT!"

"Do too."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Do not."

"Do TOO."

"Do NOT."

"DO – "

"_For the love of God_, will you two ever stop going at it?" groaned Remus as James jumped on Sirius and began to tackle him. Not to be bested, Sirius tackled him back. For a few minutes the two rolled around on the ground, beating each other up as well as two best friend eleven year old boys _can _beat each other up.

"No," they replied in unison as Sirius received a punch on his right shoulder and James on his left.

"If you can't beat 'em.." muttered Remus, remembering the expression and thinking it was _very _appropriate at this point in time. "Or, in this case..if you can't join 'em.."

He leaped on James and skillfully punched him in the nose.

* * *

"Remus hits hard," complained Sirius after the three boys had finished attempting to kill each other and were trudging back to Hogwarts, not the least bit injured but a bit sore.

"Yeah, who'd think such a puny weak little guy was so strong?" intoned James.

"Shut up.." said Remus.

"But I'm serious – " went on James.

"No you're not, I am."

There was a silence.

"Hee hee hee," cackled Sirius.

"NEVER..EVER..SAY..THAT..AGAIN!" yelled James.

"James, it can't be healthy to attempt to strangle me," choked out Sirius, attempting to loosen James's grip on his throat._ Perhaps I shouldn't have said that on top of the Evans talk.._

"THAT WAS SO UNFUNNY THAT IT WASN'T EVEN FUNNY!" shouted James. "IF YOU EVER SAY THAT AGAIN, I SHALL THROTTLE YOU!"

"Okay," gasped Sirius.

"_Glad _we got that out of the way," said James, releasing his best friend from death lock. "_Anyhow. _Remus..you're a weakling. How in the world did you manage to break my ribs?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "I did _not _break your ribs."

"Yeah, well you came pretty darn close," muttered James. "And in any case..where do you get all that hidden strength? Unless.."

Remus felt all the air knock out of him. Oh..dear..lord..

"..It's all the chocolate you eat!"

Remus breathed a sigh of relief – wait, what? "Wait, what? I do _not _eat a lot of chocolate!"

"You do too! You are a total chocoholic, I swear!"

"James is right," agreed Sirius. "Seriously – ha ha – '' At a death glare from James, he sobered up immediately, "I mean, er, honestly, at desert you always, always, always go for the chocolate pudding or milk or truffles first. Seriously – I mean, honestly – what do you have against, like, vanilla?"

"I_ like _chocolate," protested Remus in a wounded voice. "What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, I guess," said Sirius, "just that you eat SO MUCH! I'm serious!" Apparently unable to resist, he added, "Ha..ha..not that I _couldn't _be Sirius.. OUCH THAT HURTS JAMES! GET HIM OFF ME! GET HIM OFF ME, REMUS!"

* * *

That night, as the three friends lay in bed, talking idly through the dark, Sirius pointed something out that had been weaving through James's head all day.

"Y'know, we fully and totally need to do a gigantic Christmas prank. We've only done _one _this year. It's an abdominalation!"

"Do you mean an abomination?" yawned Remus.

"_You're _an abomination, Sirius," said James sleepily.

"Your _face _is an abdominatalation," declared Sirius.

"ABOMINATION," yelled Remus.

"Calm _down, _Remmie," said James tiredly.

"Do – not – call – me – Remmie!"

"All right, Nerd."

"Don't call me that either!"

"Well, whadya want me to call you?"

"I dunno, maybe, hmm, REMUS?"

"But that's so BORING!"

"As I have said..numerous times..that. is. my. Name."

"It's a boring name. Your new name is Chocoholic!" declared James with flourish.

"No. It. Is. Not."

"Whatever," cut in Sirius dismissively. "Well, I'm going to sleep, now." A few minutes later, there was loud, painfully fake snoring from his bed.

"Be very afraid," intoned James. "He's planning something as we speak."

And yes, Sirius was planning something _as they spoke. _What? Only the best prank_ ev-er!_

**A/N: Dun dun dun...**


	13. Pranked and Pranked Back

Chapter Thirteen

Pranks

Remus Lupin loved to sleep. He did not enjoy being shaken away at six thirty every single morning by his (INSANE) friends to go to classes, and he absolutely hated being awoken at any time before twelve thirty on days he did not have school. Unfortunately, he was best friends with Sirius Black, who considered a moment after six thirty when he, and _all _of his friends, were not awake was a moment wasted, regardless of the day.

Therefore, you can immediately understand why, when, on the first day of Christmas holidays, Remus opened his eyes to complete silence, and saw the sun high in the sky, he was immediately suspicious.

However, his suspicions were erased as soon as his eyes drifted towards the corner of the room..to, he was sure, what heaven looked like.

_Chocolate._

Mounds and mounds and mounds of the heavenly substance, in wrapped bars and in the form of pudding cups and great thick cakes and, and _everything, _chocolate treacle tart and chocolate cups and all sorts of Muggle chocolate sweets and even a huge vat labeled CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM.

Hardly daring to believe his eyes, Remus stepped forward, utterly dazed. Forgetting all suspicions, he looked around, hardly knowing where to begin eating.

He finally decided on the chocolate cake. He'd _always _loved chocolate cake. He picked up a spoon that was lying innocently on the ground and moved towards the cake. He gently pulled it from on top of a carton of chocolate truffles and lifted his spoon towards it..

and then very quickly, it was not there.

_None _of it was there.

_All the chocolate had disappeared._

Remus blinked. _What _had happened?

"_What _happened?" he demanded of thin air.

The air, most unfortunately, didn't answer. Remus shook his head like a wet dog, then decided it must've been an illusion.

"Transformations must be getting to me," he muttered, and set off downstairs.

Gryffindor Tower was completely empty. It was strangely daunting to hear the absolute, utter, complete _silence _in a room that was normally so bustling and full of life. Not even Sirius and James were there.

_It must be quite late, _realized Remus. They always waited for him. _Later than I thought.._he glanced at his watch and laughed to himself. It was almost two o'clock.

_It's a terrible habit you have, _he reprimanded himself. Despite himself, his mother's voice began to play in his head. _You're so studious, Remus, you're such a clever boy, you make such good use of your time, how much better would you be if you didn't spend half the day asl – oh..my..God.._

_ CHOCOLATE._

The _exact same mound _that had been in the dorm – was _back._

Remus did not waste any time this time. He lunged straight for the treacle tart, neatly snatched it up, and inserted a nearby fork.

Promptly, it disappeared. This time, though, Remus was _sure _he heard a pop – a _mocking _pop.

Remus stared for a few moments, almost miserably, at the empty spot where he could've _sworn _there was just a mountains worth of chocolate!

He slapped himself across the face. "It. Was. An. Illusion," he yelled to thin air, feeling terribly let down. "You. Are. Going. INSANE!"

"See," he said conversationally, "this is what being friends with insane people like James and Sirius can do to you.."

He shook his head, slapped himself once more, and set off towards the Great Hall, feeling let down, but not by much. After all, there'd definitely be some _very _nice chocolate sweets in the Great Hall, as there always were.

To his mild surprise, James and Sirius were waiting for him. Naturally the food was all finished.

"Took _you _long enough," Sirius greeted Remus as Remus sat down, yawning, at the table.

"We've already planned four pranks between us," added James. And they was off, actively outlining each one. Remus half-listened, half mentally slept.

"Oh yeah, and we saved you this food, figured you might be starved," finished Sirius, producing with a flourish a platter.

Remus drew in his breath sharply. Covering the plate was three types of cake and four types of pie – _all chocolate. _There was also one thick bar of white chocolate.

"You guys are brilliant," he said enthusiastically.

James and Sirius smiled.

Remus put the plate on the table and stuck his fork in – and immediately..

_it disappeared._

"WHAT JUST HAPPENED?" he shouted. Eggs and bacon were on the plate in front of him.

"Er – nothing happened," said James, looking utterly bewildered.

"What in the world are you talking about?" said Sirius slowly.

"We gave you a plate of bacon and eggs.."

"..And you said we were brilliant.."

"..And you started to eat."

Remus closed his eyes and counted slowly backwards from ten.

_I am INSANE!_

"Right..yeah..I'm..not that hungry any more.." he said in a dazed voice. "Y'know what, you guys? I'm gonna go to the library for a bit. Yeah, that's it..the library..no chocolate in the library..but that was a hallucination..I'm insane, insane, insane.."

"What are you saying under you breath?" inquired James.

Remus faked a smile. "Oh, nothing," he fibbed. "I'm off to the library. See you guys in a bit, I guess."

"Tell Meda I said hi," called Sirius as Remus walked off, throwing the eggs and bacon – which he was _so sure _was chocolate! – into the trash.

_A chocolate bar!_

There was a chocolate bar just outside the Great Hall. Almost instinctively now, Remus reached for it immediately. And right on cue..

_WHERE DO THEY GO? _He wanted to scream. They were real, he _knew _they were real! HE WAS NOT INSANE!

_Yes you are, _he thought weakly as he dragged himself to the library.

He decided to take Sirius's advice and talk to Andromeda.

Ever since their first meeting a week ago, Andromeda and Remus had been on very good terms. Since they were both so often in the library, they'd often crossed paths, and when Andromeda's friends or Ted weren't around the two found themselves talking idly. Andromeda was, as Remus discovered, a very good person to go to for advice.

And if any time, he _really _needed advice right now.

Plus, Andromeda was a Healer trainee. She knew, probably, how to Deal With this kind of thing.

_No chocolate in the library, _he thought, relief coursing through him. _Not even hallucinations.._

It was nice to know, he decided as he entered the warm, cozy library, that even in a time of need the library always came through for him.

He made a rush for the history section, in which he immediately recognized Andromeda by the hair that was longer than any girl he'd ever seen. He tentatively tapped her on the shoulder.

She turned. "Hi, Remus!" she said brightly.

"Hi, Meda," said Remus, trying to keep his voice quite steady. "Er, Meda, I've got a..how shall I put this, ah, er..a massive problem. And I think I need some advice.."

"I'm here for you," said Andromeda brightly. "Hang on a sec, let me just put this book back.." She replaced a huge book that took up at least half the shelf. "And let's sit down and talk properly."

They found two empty seats near the wonderfully warm fire. Wonderful as Hogwarts was, it could get quite drafty. For a few moments, the friends simply sat in front of the fire, feeling every cinch of themselves warm.

Finally, Andromeda looked at Remus with that intense stare of her that gave him the strange sensation that she could see straight through her. "So – what's this massive problem?" she said lightly. "It isn't..it's not your mum, is it?" Andromda's voice and gaze softened. "Is she..getting worse?"

"My m – _oh_. No. I mean, yeah..she is getting worse...but that's not why I'm upset over. I mean, I _am, _of course, I'm dead depressed about it, but that's not..." he struggled for a few minutes, trying to find one of the beautiful words in the English language that could turn into a phrase that would best describe his situation. "..it's _not the matter at __hand,_" he finally declared.

"So what _is _the matter at hand?" said Andromeda. "And I'm sorry about your mother."

Remus nodded quickly. "It's good. Anyway..Andromeda, please promise you won't laugh..I _can't _tell Sirius and James..but I thought..you..might understand.."

"I promise," said Andromeda gravely. Then she got a very Siriusy-like look in her eye. "Is it a girl?" she asked wickedly. "Is she terribly pretty?"

Remus felt his face burn. "_No!_" he cried. "I mean, not that she's not pretty – maybe she is pretty, for all I know – Andromeda, THERE IS NO SHE!"

Andromeda was laughing. The librarian glared murderously at them and they quieted down.

"Andromeda.." Remus took a deep breath. "I think I'm hallucinating," he said quickly.

"What?" said Andromeda, immediately looking worried.

"It's just, this morning when I woke up.."

Remus plunged into the entire story, from the cake in his dorm to the chocolate bar in his hallway.

"..And I figured if there was anyone who wouldn't think I was insane, it was you, Meda, so help me if you will!" he finished desperately.

Andromeda was staring into space. She looked down at Remus and closed her eyes.

"Remus, dear smart boy, you are being _immensely _thick."

Remus blinked. "..Why?"

Andromeda put her head in her hands. Her shoulders were shaking with laughter.

"Remus," she gasped in a muffled voice, "Remus, this has my cousin's name written all over it..it was _Sirius._" She looked at him. "_How _could you not see through that? He is the _master _of pranks, and I taught him _way _too much with a wand before he came of age. He knows charms that make things change when you touch things, and other charms that entitle _only _the viewer to see what wants to be seen, and all sorts of things – if I'm making any sense to you whatsoever. And I'd bet you a thousand Galleons that James Potter was in on this as well.."

Remus tilted his head back and thought for a moment. For the third time that day, he slapped himself across the face.

"HOW did I not see through that?" he cried.

"Now that we know," Andromeda said, grinning wryly, "you need to do two things. Number one, eat some chocolate. I have some in my bag, I think.." She knelt and combed quickly through her schoolbag, then triumphantly retrieved a bar of heavenly white chocolate. Remus took a bite and closed his eyes, letting the beautiful savory goodness melt in his mouth.

_Who in the world needs food or water or shelter or air or ANYTHING when you have.. chocolate?_

"And two," said Andromeda, bringing him back to earth, "you need to get back at Sirius." She grinned. "And I owe him about eleven years of getting back at, too, so I'll most _certainly..help_ you." She laughed deviously.

Remus grinned as he felt the wings that chocolate gave him melt off and tiny little devil horns sprout. "And James," he said. "He was _definitely _in on this. Now..the trick – no pun intended – is to work on his weaknesses, like he did on me."

"Sirius," said Andromeda grandly, "actually has quite a surprising..weakness."

"Oh?" said Remus, interested.

"Yes," said Andromeda, an evil smile playing across her features. "He has a _hopeless, _for want of a better word, _obsession, _for.." She leaned over and whispered in Remus's ear. Remus grinned.

"And we can get James's from his cousin," she added. "Serena. She's in the year below me, but I my house."

This was going to be _a lot _of fun..

* * *

"Hey Remus," said James a couple hours of evil planning later as the boy in question strode into the dormitory. "Want a chocolate bar?"

Remus rolled his eyes and looked at Sirius, a hint of an impish smile in his eyes. "You really need to be careful how you act around Andromeda," he said.

Sirius looked up. "Er..why?"

"Because thanks to her, I now know the _oh so funny _trick you two played on me," he said triumphantly.

Sirius slammed his fist against his bed. "I'm gonna KILL her!" he said loudly. Then, catching James's eye, he collected himself. "I mean, ahem, yes, what in the world are you talking about? Huh? HUH? WE HAVEN'T PLAYED NO TRICKS ON ANYONE! Except Slughorn. Speaking of pranks, we haven't played any in a long time.."

"One, it's _any _tricks on anyone, and two, you just _played _one," Remus said, a spot irritated, a spot amused, "on me, and you nearly drove me to St. Mungo's, d'ya know that?"

Sirius stared defiantly for a moment, before breaking down and bursting into laughter which James joined within moments. "You have to admit," he gasped, "it was funny seeing you yell 'WHAT JUST HAPPENED?' And we left some special magic cameras out and it was _dead _funny to watch you reach, a glazed over look in your eyes, for chocolate that so _tragically _disappeared.."

"I'm. Not. Amused," Remus said firmly.

"Too bad, we are," replied James cheerfully. Remus rolled his eyes. Then he took a breath. Time to put the plan into action. If there was _any _doubt before, it evaporated as his friends rolled around on the floor, laughing hysterically.

He reached behind his back for his wand, held his breath for a moment, then muttered to himself "_Cheereeya ajjo._"

Immediately a huge butterfly blossomed out of the wand. He muttered another spell and it flickered slightly in the air before turning and drifting into the air.

Immediately, Sirius and James's eyes lit up. Identically.

"A BUTTERFLY!" yelled Sirius, leaping up. "I LOVE BUTTERFLIES!" He then proceeded to chase it around the dorm as it flitted cheerfully to the corners.

"NOT AS MUCH AS I DO!" shouted James, copying his friend. Remus sat back and watched them, extremely amused.

"Whadya know," he muttered, "Andromeda and Serena were right. They both _do _have unhealthy fixtures with catching butterflies. Who'd'a thought?"

After fifteen minutes, and some _extremely _amusing moving photos Sirius and James, strategically working together, had cornered the butterfly.

"We're gonna catch it, James," whispered Sirius excitedly. "Just a little bit closer.."

James extended his hand and touched the butterfly.

There was a small _pop _and it was gone.

Both boys stared, bewildered, at the spot where there was, up until a few moments ago, a beautifully colored insect.

"NOOO!" wailed Sirius.

"THE BUTTERFLY!" cried James pitifully.

Suddenly, something snapped into place in both their minds.

"Remus.."

They both turned around to see a small, frail boy, literally rolling around on the ground, clutching his sides in laughter.

"..THAT.." Remus gasped, "WAS..HILARIOUS..oh my God I'm never letting those pictures of my sight..er..hi..guys..you know, it's not nice to look at people like – OUCH! GET OFF! HELP! HELLPP!"

* * *

** A/N: Hi dudes :) Review pleasssee...Oh yeah, and _cheereeya ajjo _is a language for "Come, bird." I wonder if anyone knows what language..  
**


	14. Christmas Plans

Chapter Fourteen

'Tis the Season to be Pranking..

"The Marauder in you comes out, Remus," said James that evening after he and Sirius had thoroughly tackled their best friend.

"Not _really,_" disagreed Remus quickly. "It was just for revenge, you know. I'd never have done it if _you _guys hadn't done it to _me._"

"Yeah, right," said Sirius airily.

"Really!"

"It's wrong to lie," yawned James, lying down.

"I'm not lying! I am _not _a Marauder."

"Yes you are too, because you spray painted Slughorn's room," Sirius reminded the indignant boy.

Remus paused and mulled this over. "All right, fine," he sighed. "I'm a Marauder. I've given in. You two have officially broken my beliefs. I didn't think it would be this early, but.." He shrugged. "It had to happen sooner or later. Are you happy now?"

"Ecstatic," beamed James. "So, will you pull pranks mercilessly with us now?"

"..No."

"Darn!"

"Well," said Sirius efficiently, "We _do _need to play a massive Christmas prank."

"Isn't Christmas about goodwill and joy?" asked Remus faintly.

"Pranks bring joy," said Sirius dismissively. "To me, in any case."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Sirius, you can be a real IDIOT sometimes...what's the _point _of playing pranks when no one's actually around?"

Sirius was silent for a moment. "There are people around," he said finally.

"Yeah, like, two."

"No, like, a lot," said Sirius firmly. "And all we have to do is figure out who actually is here. And the only way to do that.."

Remus hit his head against the desk.

"Is to stalk everyone!"

Remus hit his head harder. "WHY AM I CURSED WITH FRIENDS WHO CLEARLY NEED SERIOUS MEDICAL HELP?" he screamed.

"Hee hee hee," muttered Sirius. "Sirius help."

James patted him on the shoulder. "Not cursed, Remus," he consoled. "Blessed, my friend. Blessed to no end."

"In any case," said Sirius efficiently, "who wants to come with me? I'll go down to the Slytherin common room first, then the Ravenclaw, then the Hufflepuff. We're the only Gryffindors here. Us and Evans. Then I'll check out the library."

"I'll go, cos Remus wouldn't," said James, jumping off of his bed.

"It's after hours," said Remus weakly. "You'll get in such trouble.."

"Yes, but only if we're caught," returned James cheerfully. "And we won't be. Sirius and I have twenty two years of pranking between us!"

"You're not even twelve yet!" cried Remus, longingly watching the logic slide further and further from this conversation.

"Yeah, well eleven and eleven is twenty two," explained Sirius happily.

Remus slapped himself on the forehead.  
"Let's go, then," said James.

"I'm coming with you," Remus sighed.

James and Sirius looked at his friend in shock.

"You ARE a Marauder!" declared Sirius ecstatically.

Remus sighed again.

There was no reasoning sometimes.

* * *

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my GOD – "

"Sirius, _shut up, _what if you're heard?" hissed Remus. "And what are you 'oh my God' – ing about anyway?"

_ "Look," _Siriusbreathed.

In front of them was a girl. She was very, very, very tall, and carried an air of pompousness about her. She was fairly pretty, with long, long black hair that reached midway down her back. She walked with a brisk stride and something about the way she held herself said "I'm better than anyone and everyone else." She radiated an air of something that was rather scary.

"Er – who is that?" asked James cautiously.

"My _dear _cousin Bellatrix," replied Sirius bitterly. "Urgh, I _hate _her..dya know what? I was planning a really _massive _prank..but now that I know _she's _here, it has to be even _more _massive."

He stood up straight. "I now have a reason to go on with this prank," he said briskly. "Let's go back to the dorm, fast, before we run into Peeves."

And they did.

All through the night, the three boys plotted and planned. Some of the plots were absolutely ridiculous, but Sirius insist that Remus write every single one down. And so, painstakingly, he did.

The results:

CHRISTMAS PRANKS:

A LIST COURTESY OF THE MARAUDERS.

(Do Not Read If You're Not A Marauder)

1) Take down all the stars from the ceiling to the Great Hall and glue them around the school.

2) Paint the entire school with Gryffindor colors.

3) Bring sheep into the school.

4) Sit on Dumbledore's knee and call him Father Christmas.

5) Demand presents.

6) Plant Christmas trees. Everywhere.

7) Charm everyone to sing notes of "Deck the Halls" every time they open their mouths.

8) Make it snow inside.

9) Throw things.

10) Climb to the top of the Astronomy Tower and shout out Christmas carols.

11) Enchant James to ask Lily Evans to marry him.

"Wait, WHAT?" yelled James, leaning over the list. "WHEN did we put that one in? Cuz we're NOT enchanting me to ask Evans to marry me! I DON'T FANCY HER!"

"Yes you do, and yes we are," said Sirius happily. "It's the best one of the lot."

Remus rolled his eyes. "No, Sirius, It really, really isn't. Although it would be humorous..."

"How COULD you, Remus?" James 'sobbed.' "Betrayer of my trust, you were supposed to be my FRIEND.."

"You'll get over it," Remus said dryly. "Now, anyways, personally I think the best of the lot is six and eight."

"I like three," said James, apparently recovered.

"We're _not _doing three," said Remus firmly. "I just wrote that to humor you guys."

"My favorite is eleven," insisted Sirius.

"Well, we're not _doing _that one," said James menacingly.

"All right, fine," sighed Sirius painstakingly. "My favorite is seven. I think we should do _all _of them, though."

"NO," yelled Remus firmly. "We'll do six and eight. But we're NOT doing ALL of them. Some of them don't even make sense! I mean, seriously. _Throw things?_"

"Six and eight, then," said Sirius. "_And _seven. _And,_ Remus, _you _will help us."

Remus rolled his eyes and sighed deeply. "All right," he said. "You two could never pull it off without me, so I guess I'll help. Now, for number seven.."

And he did.

* * *

**A/N: Mwahahahaaa... so, after Christmas I do a crazy time warp on you and skip to the end of the year, just because nothing noteworthy happens. Then we have a couple end of the year chapters, a few summer chapters, and then SECOND YEAR! And we all know what _second year _means..**


	15. Sheep?

Chapter Fifteen

What Do Sheep Have To Do With ANYTHING?

Lily Evans was tired. She had stayed at Christmas for the holidays, wanting to "see how it was." She had stayed up till four A.M the night (or was it morning?) before. As she was the only one in her dorm, she had buried her nose in a book and _completely _lost track of time. So, even though it was almost two o'clock PM when she finally arose, she was tired.

She sleepily pulled off her pajamas and put on some loose jeans and a warm sweatshirt, then trudged down the stairs to the common room. Only three people were there, two of whom she hated, one of whom she didn't mind much.

Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, and James Potter, playing a game of Exploding Snap.

"Good morning, Evans," said James quickly. His hands trailed to his hair, which he attempted to flatten. Sirius smirked at him and James quickly jammed his hands in his pockets, scowling slightly.

"Morning, Lily," yawned Remus.

"Yo" was all Sirius said, still smirking at James, who glared at him.

Lily yawned. She opened her mouth to greet Remus. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sirius flick his wand slightly and mutter something under his breath.

As she opened her mouth, a _very _peculiar thing happened.

"_Deck the halls with boughs of holly, falalalallaala,_" she began to sing. Horrified, she clamped her mouth shut.

_Why had she done that?_

Sirius, James, and even Remus were practically rolling on the ground laughing. It didn't take Lily long enough to figure out what had happened.

THEY had done something!

She opened her mouth again, to yell at them, but once more, she burst into song.

"_Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la_ – ''

Horrified, she clamped her mouth shut. She decided at this point it was best to mime. She pointed at them each in turn, sure her eyes were fiery with fury, and made a cutting motion against her throat.

"Evans is going to kill us," predicted James.

Lily nodded furiously, then ran out of the common room, just as Remus, James, and Sirius burst into laughter once more.

* * *

Bellatrix Lestrange was in a very, very good mood. It was only two thirty PM, and yet she'd already:

a) made a Muggle born cry with _just her eyes_,

b) styled her hair absolutely perfectly

and c) seen her cousin Sirius and realized _was _in fact staying at Hogwarts, which made being made to stay by her mother who insisted Narcissa needed to be alone for a weekend (which Bellatrix could only figure meant to stop tormenting her so) a whole lot more fun.

Bellatrix enjoyed nothing more, not even teasing Cissy or even Meda, then tormenting Sirius.

As she strolled down the corridors of Hogwarts, feeling immensely proud of herself, she bumped into something. Hard. She fell to the ground, head reeling with pain, and looked up angrily. And there was..

a Christmas tree that Bellatrix _swore _wasn't there before. She hissed to herself, massaged her head, and stalked off down the hall.

One, two, three heads popped out from behind a wall. They stayed rigid for a few moments, then collapsed laughing.

"Oh, I can't wait until we come face to face with her and she tries talking," gasped James, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes.

"The look on her _face.._" Remus gasped.

"Oh, that was _awesome,_" declared Sirius.

"_What _did you say?" came a voice more like a snarl. Sirius froze as the same tall girl from last night stepped around the corner, a rather scary look on his face.

"Er..hello," said James, recognizing the girl. He cast around for something to say. "Ah..do I know you?"

"I should hope not," snarled Bellatrix, looking him over swiftly. "You're a Potter, aren't you?"

"Er..yes."

"Potters are blood tr –_ Don we now our gay apparel, fa la la, la la la, la la la!"_

If looks could kill, the three Marauders would have already been buried and wept over as Bellatrix clamped her mouth shut. Sirius had apparently unfrozen long enough to flick his wand and mutter that one lethal word, the Singing Spell: "_Ghana gauo!_"

Bellatrix mouthed furiously for a few seconds, and of course, more song came flying from her mouth. "_Troll the ancient Yule tide carol, fa la la la la, la la la la!_"

She went quite purple in the face. She pointed at Sirius and mimed writing.

"You'll be writing to my mum, are you?" Sirius said, sounding, oddly enough, amused, stepping a step closer to his cousin, so they were eye to eye (well, Bellatrix was quite a bit taller than him, so it was more like eye to stomach.) "I've got news for you, dear cousin Bella..._I don't care._ Now why don't you go and sing to Lestrange?" He winked as Bellatrix, utterly enraged, shook her wand at him. Sparks flew at the three as Bellatrix turned and swept away.

"That. Was. Epic," declared James.

"Enormously so," agreed Sirius cheerfully. "C'mon. Let's put number three – er, eight, into action!"

* * *

When Minerva McGonagall was younger, ("about a thousand years ago" so said her students,) she'd greatly prided herself on her thick, dark black hair. She was proud to say that it hadn't yet gone grey yet.

Therefore, when she glanced at herself in the reflective window as she passed, and saw her hair speckled with white, she was, understandably, rather angered.

"WHAT is going on?" she demanded to midair. She crooked her head slightly to the ceiling..

..and nearly fell over.

It was snowing.

And it wasn't just falling lightly, which would've been bad enough, no, it was a real..indoor..blizzard. Looking around, she wondered how she hadn't noticed it before. There was heaps and heaps of snow covering the ground, at least three feet thick, and there was even a snowman with stick arms and a carrot grin. There was even a decorated Christmas tree coated gently with white.

"Oh..my...days.." she whispered, revolving slowly on the spot as snow fell around her, slightly mesmerized. She hadn't seen snow like this for..years..

She slapped her face. "WHAT am I doing?" she demanded to thin air. She looked around. "This is a prank..it's a student's doing..unless Albus has been going at his silly 'Christmas festivities' again..I need to put a stop to this..but do I want to? Oh, my lord.."

"Hee, hee, hee."

McGonagall whirled around and peered around the corner.

"Hee, hee, hee."

"Show yourself," she said, in her deadliest tone of voice, "_right now._"

Hasty whispering could be heard from behind the wall.

_Meanwhile, behind the wall:_

Remus was hyperventilating. "She'sgonnakillusshe'sgonnakillusshe'sgonnakillus," he gasped. "WE'RE ALL GONNA GET EXPELLED!"

"Shh, we're not getting _expelled,_" said James dismissively. "Not for such a little pranks. C'mon, the woman said to show ourselves. And we'd best show ourselves!"

"WE'RE GONNA GET EXPELLED!"

"No, Remus, we are _not _going to get expelled," said Sirius firmly. "Now come on, let's show ourselves. And remember, if anyone asks, we are _not _responsible for this prank!"

"I should've known," muttered McGonagall as the three children emerged from behind the wall. "Sirius Black – he has mischief written all over his forehead. And James Potter pulled that little stunt with the fireworks. Remus Lupin? Well, they do share a dorm, I suppose he got dragged into it some way or the other.."

"Are you three responsible for this?" was what she demanded aloud.

"Er – responsible for what?' asked Sirius, feigning complete and utter innocence. He looked around.

"Black, do not play dumb with me, because it will not work. Now, answer my question. And you, Potter."

"What question?" asked James innocently.

McGonagall felt her temper rise. "_Are you responsible for this?"_

"Responsible for WHAT?" exclaimed Sirius.

McGonagall allowed herself a moment to pause and regain sanity. "Are you, Black and Potter, and I don't know how you dragged Lupin into this, but – are any of you three responsible for the fact that it is currently snowing inside Hogwarts?"

"I TOLD YOU WE WERE GONNA GET EXPELLED!"

Apparently Remus had lost control. Sirius slapped his own forehead and James groaned. "Remus, we almost had ourselves covered!"

"My office," said McGonagall in a very scary voice. "_Now._"

And, Remus still muttering wildly about being expelled, they went.

"I have one word for you three," said McGonagall in a deadly quiet voice. "_Why."_

"Why what?" asked Sirius nervously.

"WHY," said McGonagall, maintaining the same deadly quiet tone, "would you even WANT to make it snow inside HOGWARTS? Especially knowing as you could very well be expelled for something like this!" She was exaggerating, of course. You couldn't actually expel someone for a prank. No matter how.._insane _it was.

"I TOLD you!" wailed Remus desperately, and McGonagall felt slightly guilty.

"Well – you won't be _expelled,_" she corrected herself. "But you can and will lose your house points and you can count on two weeks' worth of detention. At. The. Least."

Remus did not exactly look calmed at these words.

"Well...we have an amazingly good explanation," said James triumphantly.

"Oh?" said McGonagall, furiously glaring at him. "I'd love to hear it."

"All right," said James, and no one in the room could help admire his calmness. "Now, see Remus there? See him? Wave, Remus, so she sees you."  
"Mr. Potter, I hardly think that is necessary – ''

"WAVE!"

Remus waved meekly.

"Good," said James in a pleased tone. "See his hand? Oi, Remus, hold it out for me. See those scars, Professor McGonagall? Wanna know how he got em?"

Remus's heart stopped considerably. He got them from a rather rough full moon, years and years ago, so bad he had clawed up his own hands.

"They're _sun burns, _Professor McGonagall," said James solemnly.

Remus refrained from slapping himself, James, and Sirius on the face. And applauding. From what he could see, this looked like a very good story shaping out..

"You see, when Remus was a very young child, he lived in the hot, hot country of..er.."

Sirius, through a combination of years of experience and plain old knowing his friend, saw where James was going. He also saw that he had reached a temporary halt. He picked up.

"He lived in..Australia," Sirius said triumphantly. "Why, he stayed there until last year. And poor old Remmie... never saw one flake of snow."

"It's snowing now!" cried McGonagall, almost hysterically, watching the logic slide from the conversation, just as Remus practically growled, _"Don't call me Remmie."_

"Yes, but it doesn't count," said James firmly.  
"And why not?" challenged McGonagall.

"Because," Remus surprised them all, "because..ah..you see, there is a special type of Australian snow that happens every twenty years or so, called, er, an antidisestablishmentarianism storm. They, ah, have a special, er, white, fluffy quality to them, a little bit more fluffy and white than normal flakes, that's antidisestablishmentarianism flakes.. And it's been my life dream to see an antidisestablishmentarianism flake. But see, England doesn't really _snow _antidisestablishmentarianism flakes. So my dear friends whipped up a storm of antidisestablishmentarianism snowflakes." He smiled triumphantly.

Minerva McGonagall had heard many wild stories in her lifetime.

But _nothing _like this.

And then the strangest thing happened.

She began..

to laugh.

Insanely.

Crazily.

As if nothing had ever been so funny.

_Hysterically._

"Go," was all that she could say. "Just go."

"No detention?" Sirius could barely believe it.

"Just GO."

* * *

"That was _awesome, _Rem!"

"I knew you had it in ya!"

"I..did _not_ have it in me. That just came..from a desperate want not to get detention. Or expulsion."

"Does Australia _really _snow antidisestablishmentarianism flakes?" asked Sirius curiously as the three boys went down the stairs.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Yes. And I was _really _born in Australia. And y'know what else? Gullible was removed from the dictionary last night."

"I'll have you know," said Sirius haughtily, "that I _know _that one."

"You fell for it the first time, didn't you?" said James, extremely amused.

"I was only six," protested Sirius.

"Liar," came a cheerful voice from behind him. The three turned around. "You were ten."

"I was not, Meda," Sirius countered as Remus and James exploded into laughter. "Anyway – '' He glared at his friends, then switched his gaze to his favorite cousin, who was wearing a rather evil grin, "The three of just played three of the possibly wickedest pranks ever to hit Hogwarts. And we DIDN'T even get in trouble."

Andromeda looked amused. "None of these pranks would have anything to do with my very angry – er – _dear _older sister coming up to me and giving me a piece of paper that says 'I'M GOING TO KILL SIRIUS BLACK', and then when I forced her to open her mouth, bursting into song?"

Sirius, James, and Remus collapsed into laughter. "It might have a little something," Sirius managed to say.

"And you don't – you _can't –_ have _anything _to do with the Christmas trees scattered all over Hogwarts, can you?" pressed Andromeda, grinning like no other as the three delved deeper and deeper into their laughter.

"And – forgive me, I know you would _never _commit such a.._heinous _crime! – but the fact remains that the left hallway on the fifth floor is completely.._ snowed in_, and I just ran into Professor McGonagall, who was wringing her hands, muttering to herself, something about _Potter, Black, and EVEN LUPIN._" Andromeda regarded the three eleven year olds, trying to muster up some sternness. Her glasses perching on the end of her nose helped some, but they didn't drown out the grin she was failing to fight.

"We..know..nothing," gasped James, holding out his hands.

"Nothing," emphasized Remus, finally catching his breath. "Although I am quite impressed with the quick save I got myself. Andromeda, your cousin may possibly be the most gullible boy on this planet, did you know that?"

"It's extremely plausible," replied Andromeda cheerfully. "C'mon, I'll walk with you three down to lunch..all my other friends are home."

"Heyyyyy.." protested Sirius, adopting an injured tone. "I am _not _gullible.."

"So where's the other one?" said Andromeda as they set off down the stairs. "Pettigrew?"

"Peter went home," replied James cheerfully. He frowned. "Not that I'm happy about that, or anything. I like Peter. He's a good excuse."

"A good excuse?" repeated Andromeda.

"Yeah, like, if I'm late to Transfiguration, I can just say that it was Peter walking slow – _and everyone believes it._"

Andromeda, Sirius, and Remus laughed. "So have they gotten rid of the snow yet?" inquired Remus.

"No," replied Andromeda, smiling. "You three have made it quite hard to..I don't know _what _you did, and personally, I'm not sure I want to."

"You already do," said Sirius dismissively. "You taught me it.."

"Did I?" said Andromeda vaguely. "Oh, there's Maryna, I thought she'd gone home – apparently I was wrong..I'll see you three. Oh, and by the way – '' She reached into her bag, and to Remus's muffled groan of horror, pulled out –

A small, white sheep.

"I _hope _you three don't have anything to do with this small, white sheep planted in my dear older sister's bag," she said firmly, gently placing it on the ground, as James and Sirius fell over laughing at the look of mingled amusement, exasperation, and shock on Remus's face, but there was a twinkle in her eye and she winked as she sped up to walk with her friend.

"To quote Minerva McGonagall," said Remus resignedly, pushing the doors to the Great Hall open, "_why?_"

"To quote... some famous dude," replied James, "why not?"

The sheep toddled away, almost never to be seen again. Some say it roamed forevermore in the shadows of Hogwarts. Others say it walked out to America and became a professional farm sheep. All anyone knew that every time the Marauders would play a fantastical prank, there would be a baa..almost like a baa of approval.

* * *

**A/N: Hiiii all :) The sheep and it's baaing will make a reappearance in this story..in the distant future :P And antidisestablishmentarianism means "to be against those who are against those who are for those of the process of establishing things, particularly churches." Other than medical words, it's the longest in the dictionary.  
..Don't ask. Just don't ask.**


	16. Christmas Day

Chapter Sixteen

Christmas

"Oy, wake up."

"It's six thirty, Sirius.." groaned Remus, holding a pillow over his head.

"Remmie..it's time to _WAKE UP!"_

"Six thirty, James!"

"It's CHRISTMAS!"

"And your point is, Sirius..?"

"No one sleeps late on Christmas, silly! Now wake up before I unwrap all your presents myself."

"Sirius..you don't really get the point of Christmas, do you?"

"I do, I do. Just, you know, not when there are presents in sight. Now WAKE UP."

"All right, all right," groaned Remus, finally removing the pillows from his face and opening his eyes. He caught sight of an enormous stack of Christmas presents at the edge of his bed and couldn't help but smile.

"We're such good friends," said James importantly, "that we waited until YOU woke up before we unwrapped OUR presents."

"How long have you been up?" yawned Remus, sitting up in bed.

"An hour," replied Sirius airily.

"Since five thirty?" said Remus faintly.

"Yeah," said James dismissively. "Early bird gets the worm and all that."

"It's Christmas!" supplied Sirius unnecessary. "Now, finally, we can open our presents." He dove on them.

"Open yours, Rem," James ordered. "I sent you a really good one."

Remus pinked slightly. "You didn't have to," he mumbled.

"How many times must I say it in one morning?" said James impatiently. "It. Is. CHRISTMAS. Of COURSE I had to."

"I didn't get you anything very good," pointed out Remus, going redder still. The fact that his family had almost no money, in the wizarding world or the real one, was a rather touchy one for him, especially as, even though no one knew it, it was all his fault for being a..thingy.

But they didn't have to know that last part.

"Remus..this is AMAZING.." Sirius said an awed voice, holding up the fat book.

"A _book?_" said James in disbelief.

"Look at the title, mate," said Sirius, shaking his head. "Just _look at the title._"

James looked. The title was one word.

_Pranks._

"It has – the – greatest – pranks – ever," declared Sirius fervently, breath coming in short gasps. "And a couple of the better ones."

James tore open the brightly packaged red gift on his own bed, addressed _To James, from Remus. _He shouted with glee when he found an identical book.

Remus smiled. "You like it?" he said softly. It was only something off of the discount rack at the Hogwarts Christmas Shop (as first- and second-years could not go into Hogsmeade, this was Dumbledore's solution: a Hogwarts Christmas Gift Shop) and a Duplication charm.

"_Like _it?" said Sirius faintly. "Oh, lord, Remus..my gift is_ absolutely inadequate in comparison_, as you would say."

"No it's not," gasped Remus as he tore open the paper off the package. "Oh, lord – _oh, lord – "_

A huge box of chocolates lay in the box.

The next few minutes passed in a flurry of wrapping paper and shouts and thank yous and a fair amount of hitting over the head in glee.

"Good lord, your mum is amazing, James," declared Sirius in a voice of gleeful awe. "Lookit what she sent me – a whole box of cakes and sweets and things – and a sweater, too – it's like she knew that I wouldn't get anything from Mum – although there _is _something here from Meda, I wonder what it is – "

"I wrote her some stuff," said James evasively. He dove back into his own stack of presents.

"It's a _watch,_" came the answer.

Remus, who had already opened and exclaimed over all his gifts, abstained from rolling his eyes. "You've never gotten much for Christmas, have you, Sirius?"

"No," Sirius replied happily. "Sometimes Meda and Regulus and I would give each other things, small things, but that would pretty much be it, and after Meda left and started staying at Hogwarts, we were pretty much just say 'Happy Christmas' and go to someone's house and that would be Christmas. This makes a very nice change, I must say." He beamed. "Things from you and James and Peter and Meda and Mrs. James's Mother – "

"Mrs. James's Mother?" repeated Remus.

"I'm not formal like you are, Rem, if you met Mrs. James's Mother you'd probably call her 'Mademoiselle Potter' or – ''

"No, I wouldn't, that would imply that she was not married, I would say – ''

"See, here you are, going on with your random annoying smart facts, you even know them in _French – "_

"Just because I've studied French doesn't mean – "

"It means you're a nerd, that what it – "

"The difference between 'mademoiselle' and 'madam' is extremely important if you ever go to France and – ''

"WHY WOULD I EVER GO TO FRANCE? THAT IS _COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS_!"

"YOU'RE _COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS_!"

"YOUR FACE IS _COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS_!"

"Where did this argument stem from?" asked Remus weakly.

"The – you – I – James – you know..I honestly have no idea," admitted Sirius.

And they laughed.

"Why so serious, James?" asked Remus, and a quick death glare at Sirius closed his mouth. "Usually when we start arguing you jump right in and bring up something crazy and obscure –"

"Who uses words like obscure?" muttered Sirius. Remus chose to ignore this.

"To make us yell at each other even more."

"Oh, Merlin..my..dad..is..amazing," breathed James. He was fingering something.

"Cool," said Sirius, sounding faintly interested. "What'd he send ya? Firewhisky?"

"Something better," declared James.

From his trunk, he pulled out a silky cloak, a silvery white color, and huge - big enough to cover all the Marauders, easy.

Remus looked confused. "What – ''

"Oh..my..GOD," Sirius cut him off. "James. I am officially the most jealous person in the world."

"He said it used to be _his _dad's," said James breathlessly, "and before that his dad's dad's, and his dad's dad's dad's, and his dad's dad's dad's dad's, and his dad's dad's dad's dad's dad's, and his dad's dad's dad's dad's dad's dad's – that's..hang on..I think it's six generations of Potters, Sirius. And now it's mine." He looked at the white fabric almost reverently.

"That's so wicked," declared Sirius.

"What _is _it?" demanded Remus.

"You don't _know?_" said Sirius, a trace of wither in his voice.

"Obviously not," said Remus. "And it looks rather important. You know, to be handed down six generations – and I'm fairly sure this one would be the seventh, I was never good with counting generations. But I do now that..I don't think something of mere unimportance – particularly in a family of, as I have heard, approximately three centuries of wizard marriages – I do not think that a family of such great number – ''

"_Speak English,_" cut in Sirius.

"All right, fine. I'll use little words so your tiny little brain can comprehend it."

"I resent that," said Sirius indignantly.

"WHAT IS THE STUPID WHITE CLOTH?" yelled Remus.

"Oh, is that what you wanted to know?" said James, smiling wickedly. "This, my dear annoying smart friend, is – wait. I'll show you_. _Watch this." He draped the cloak around his shoulders –

and quite suddenly, he wasn't there anymore.

Remus jumped about ten feet in the air. Even Sirius, who knew what was coming and was watching with an excited little air of smugness, gasped. "Is that – is that _really _– I've read about them – '' Remus was too overcome to form full sentences.

"A true, real, completely nonFake Cloak of Invisibility," finished James quietly, a soft smile playing across his mouth.

"I HATE you," declared Sirius enviously.

"Think of the _pranks _we can pull with this," said James. His voice had still not quite lost its awed quality.

"The Slytherins will never know what hit them," proclaimed Sirius happily.

"But these – cloaks – so rare – '' Remus was still unable to string an entire sentence together. "The Invisibility Cloak is the third Deathly Hallow! My dad told me about them! From the Tale of Three Brothers!"

"The Tale of Three Brothers?" said Sirius vaguely. "Meda told me that story ages ago..it's a faerie tale, innit? Teaching kids not to run away from death or whatever?"

"Yeah, I thought so," said Remus, finally able to speak coherently, but still quite breathless. "But – the Cloak – it really _exists!"_

"Learn something new every day," said Sirius, looking mildly interested. "James, give it here a sec – lemme check if it's genuine."

"How will you do that?" asked James, passing over the silver fabric.

"_Finite incantatem," _muttered Sirius, pointing his wand to the cloak.

"Put it on now," he directed, throwing it, this time, to Remus, who uncertainly wrapped it around his shoulders. True enough, he disappeared.

"You," proclaimed Sirius, pointing to James, "are now in possession of the most important Deathly Hallow there is."

"Cool," said James, still sounding only mildly impressed. The only thing on his mind at this moment was that a) this thing had gone through _seven generations _and b) pranks.

Sirius sighed in contentment and lay down on his bed. There was an odd sort of crunching noise and Sirius yelped in pain. He sat up and searched his bed.

"Must've overlooked this – Uncle Alphard sent me something – Remus, hold this a second, this stuff is falling off my bed, I need to organize it all.." Sirius passed Remus the silver watch from Andromeda, which Remus quickly slid onto his bed and shied away from it.

Even though his father had promised him that the stories his mum had read him when he was five about werewolves dying when confronted with silver were just, well, stories, he still could not bring himself to touch anything silver.

But they didn't have to know that.

"All right, give it here," said Sirius, once his bed less resembled a war torn land and resembled a bed a bit more.

Remus took a deep breath, and suddenly he knew that if he did it, if he overcame his ridiculous fear, today, he would, he _could, _do anything.

He examined the watch. "This pure silver?"

"Yeah," replied Sirius.

Remus took a breath, then picked up the watch and handed it back to Sirius.

And he survived.

And he smiled.

* * *

That evening, after an_ amazing _feast, a few very satisfactory pranks (even though James, Sirius, and Remus_ swore _they didn't have anything to do with turning the remaining Slytherins' hair red and green, and Bellatrix Black's a fantastic shade of bright orange..) four games of Exploding Snap and six of Wizard's Cheess (Sirius had received the Exploding Snap from James, James had received the Wizard's Chess from Sirius, and the hair-color-change spell – not that they were responsible for it – came from Remus's gift) the three Marauders trekked up to bed.

After they'd finished talking in the dark about various pranks they might pull with the Invisibility Cloak and the Book, James finally fell asleep practically mid sentence, and Remus and Sirius lapsed into silence.

"You've been acting weird today, Rem," remarked Sirius after a few minutes of quiet.

"Have I?"

"Yeah. Happier, or something. You barely protested to that prank we pulled at all and you actually joined in on our plotting."

Remus smiled sleepily. "I..accomplished something today."

"What"

"I.. can't tell you," said Remus carefully.

Sirius was quiet a minute. "Will I ever find out?"

"Probably..not," admitted Remus. "I'm sorry, but I can't tell you. My mum'd kill me..but I accomplished..something..that I've never done before."

"Well, congratulations, then," said Sirius cheerfully. "Merry Christmas and g'night."

"'Night."

That day was day of firsts for all three Marauders.

James had, for the first time, gained possession of something he actually really, truly would guard with his life, something he _truly _cared for.

It was the first satisfactory Christmas Sirius ever had.

And it was the first time Remus Lupin had overcome something truly important to him.

It was a _very _good day indeed.


	17. Preparation

Chapter Seventeen

Preparation

The rest of the year melted away in record time in a mingle of pranks, arguments, teasing, the occasional Howler that no one particularly cared about anymore, and secret transformations. All in all, it was a great year.

For the most part.

The week before the final exams, the four Marauders discovered a secret about Remus: he went insane when faced with the prospect of examination.

_Really._

"Oh, woe is me, woe is me," said Sirius dramatically. "Potions final exams are _tomorrow_."

"You should've STUDIED," snapped Remus.

"I don't have _time,_" said Sirius dismissively. "Besides, I'll always be awful in Potions. No amount of studying will ever change that."

"I'm _horrible _in Potions," snapped Remus, "but I've studied like _mad _anyway. Here – '' Remus shoved him his book, "test me on the ingredients of Wiggenweld Potions."

Sirius heaved a sigh. "What are the ingredients of the Wiggenweld Potions?" he said in a singsong voice.

"One pint of Horklump juice, two drops of flobberworm mucus, seven chizpurfle fangs, billywig sting slime, a sprig of mint, boom berry juice, one stewed mandrake, drops of honeywater, sloth brain mucus, moondew drops, a powedered root of asphodel, shredded dittany, wiggentree bark, moly petals, salamander blood, and ten – lionfish – spines," recited Remus in one breath.

Sirius looked at James in wonder. "The scary part is, he's right," he said. He glared at Remus. "And you say you're _bad _in Potions?"

"I can memorize ingredients just fine, but I always muck up actually putting it together!" said Remus, almost hysterically.

"_Why?_" said Peter.

"BECAUSE," yelled Remus. "NOW LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M TRYING TO STUDY!"

"Okay," squeaked Peter.

"AND I'D SUGGEST YOU DO THE SAME, AS YOU'RE HARDLY SCRAPING BY IN TRANSFIGURATION AND FAILING POTIONS!"

Peter looked rather hurt. And somewhat frightened.

"That was uncalled for, mate," said James. "Pete's a fellow Marauder."

"Yeah, Rem, that was a bit harsh," agreed Sirius bracingly. "Especially seeing as you're failing too."

"I AM NOT!" Remus screamed.

"Whoa, calm down, Rem," said Sirius.

"LEAVE ME ALONE," yelled Remus, "I AM TRYING TO _STUDY!" _He caught the stares of several second years. "STOP LOOKING AT ME!"

They quickly turned their heads.

"Maybe we'd better leave him alone," said Sirius quietly.

"Maybe," agreed James. "C'mon, Peter, I'll test you. Give me the book and recite the seventeen ingredients of the Wiggenweld potion..."

* * *

"I'M GONNA FAIL, I'M GONNA FAIL, I'M GONNA FAIL!"

"You're not gonna fail, Rem," mumbled Sirius, holding a pillow over his head. "Now will you _please _go to sleep? It's two thirty in the morning."

"I – have – to – memorize – the – ingredients – of – this – potion!"

"_No, _Remus," said James, sitting up in bed, "you do not. We're getting tested tomorrow on the Wiggenweld Potion. _Nothing _else. And you have already memorized the ingredients. Backwards and forwards. You have also memorized the procedure. You can recite off of the top of your head. You will ace the bloody exam. Now for the sake of all things exhausted, will you PLEASE JUST GO TO SLEEP?"

" – Add six cauliflower roots to the pit of an apple core and mix in eight dragon feathers – '' was Remus's answer.

James groaned. "This is one of the times," he said to Sirius, "that I wish I was Peter..the guy can sleep through an _earthquake."_

"This is _worse _than an earthquake," muttered Sirius. "I can't _wait _for these things to be over."

"So what should we do?" asked James. Remus, evidently, could not hear them over his own insane recitations.

"He'll wear himself out eventually," yawned Sirius.

TWO HOURS LATER..

"I'm gonna FAIL I'm gonna FAIL I'm gonna FAAAAAAAIL – ''

"YOU ARE NOT GOING TO FAIL," shouted a sleep-deprived Sirius Black, "BECAUSE I'M GOING TO MURDER YOU BEFORE YOU TAKE THE EXAM!"

"And _I,_" declared James, grabbing his hysterical friend, who was still, at four thirty a.m in the morning, screaming about failing, by the arm, "am going to take you the Hospital Wing for a Salming Dotion or a Cleeping Praught or _whatever _it is. Come on, Sirius, let's grab him!"

Sirius took hold of Remus's other arm and they both trucked him out of the dormitory, to his screams. "NO! NOT THE HOSPITAL WING! TAKE ME TO THE LIBRARY! _THE LIBRARY!"_

Peter slept through it all.

"I'm gonna faiiiiiiiiiiiiil," whimpered Remus. "PLEASE take me to the library."

"We're taking you to a very nice place that'll teach you everything," James invented wildly. "And then you won't fail."

"Promise?"

"Sure," said James. "Oh look here we are..MADAM POMFREY OPEN UP!" he yelled, pounding wildly on the door.

She opened the door, looking absolutely livid. "You are _disturbing my patients," _she hissed.

"Remus has gone insane over stress of exams," whispered James. "He needs a Calming Draught."

"Ah," said Madam Pomfrey, eyes softening as they traveled over an exhausted James and a livid Sirius to a hysterical Remus, who had resumed shrieking. "THIS ISN'T THE LIBRARY! YOU LIIIIIIED!"

"Come in," said Madam Pomfrey. "Fast."

And they did.

To James's utter shock, they were not the only ones in the Hospital Wing. About four boys from their year and three girls, including Lily Evans, were sitting there, all with bags under their eyes, all wringing their hands, all mumbling madly about the library. Remus immediately joined her.

"Evans!" said James happily.

She looked up from her mumbling and her eyes focused. "POTTER," she snapped. "I HATE YOU."

Then she went back to mumbling.

Sirius apparently wasn't angry enough to nudge James and whistle slightly under his breath. He stuck out an ankle and James, eyes only for Lily, tripped. He straightened up in a moment and snarled at Sirius, who smiled innocently.

"My mistake," he whispered. "What are you so angry about?"

"You made me look like a git in front of Evans!" snarled James.

Sirius smiled again, even more innocently. "And why does that matter to you? You don't, after all, fancy her.."

"Shut up," whispered James, turning a bright, fiery red.

Sirius laughed quietly.

"LILY!" screamed Remus.

"REMUS!" screamed Lily.

"ARE THEY KEEPING YOU HERE TOO?" screamed Remus.

"SHE WON'T LET ME STUDY!" screamed Lily.

"ME NEITHER!" screamed another kid sitting nearby.

"ME NEITHER!"

"ME NEITHER!"

"ME NEITHER!"

Soon everyone in the chairs were screaming.

"Madam Pomfrey," said Sirius weakly, "for all of our sanities, _just let the geeks study."_

"Or this," said Madam Pomfrey, throwing a powder over all of them in turn. Immediately that all relaxed into the chairs.

"What is it?" asked Sirius, relaxing quite visibly.

"Calming Draught," said Madam Pomfrey briskly.

"Madam Pomfrey?" said James weakly.

"Yes, Mr. Potter?"

"You're my hero."

* * *

THE NEXT DAY

"That was pretty easy," said Remus cheerfully as they left the Potions room after the exam.

Sirius and James glanced at each other.

"Remus.." said James in deadly tones.

"Yeah?"

"I'm...going..TO KILL YOU!"

**

* * *

A/N: Hi guys, it's been ages...life's been **_**insane, **_**lately, plus this story (which is, in my computer, up to chapter thirty-eight) has totally come to a block. I'll work through it...eventually...**

** Oh yeah, and sorry for the time warp; nothing else important was happening, the summer's funner anyhow :P Although it'll be quite stupid if you don't like serious Sirius drama...lemme know if you do, in a review :)**

**Oh yeah, and also, the Wiggenweld Potion is from the video game, which, sadly, I've never actually played. Ah, the things you can get from Harry Potter Wikia!**

**Review!  
**


	18. Goodbyes

Chapter Eighteen

Goodbyes

"Alas, woe is me, woe is me, woe is me," said Sirius dramatically. "The last day of school. The last day of school. The last day of school. I have never been so depressed in my life. Which sounds kind of weird, since I always hated tutoring. But still..woe is me."

"It can't be that bad," said Remus encouragingly, although he didn't believe his own words.

"It is," Sirius said grimly.

"Oh," said Remus. The boys were stretched out next to the lake, enjoying their last glorious day at Hogwarts.

"I want to stay here," whined Sirius after a moment. "I don't like it there."

"I swear I'll write to you every day," promised James.

"Me too," promised Remus.

"Me too," promised Peter.

"Come on," sighed James after a moment, "we'd better make sure all our stuff is packed."  
The Leaving Feast was over.

The exams were over.

The lessons were over.

As far as Sirius was concerned, his life was pretty much over.

For three months, anyway.

The day was a rushed one, full of last minute packing and goodbyes and one last prank (but the Marauders totally didn't have anything to do with all slips reminding the students not to use magic handed out suddenly change to read USE MAGIC AS MUCH AS OFTEN, to the short jubilation of all the students before McGonagall realized what had happened, put it right, and promised the Marauders that if she found proof it was them then she would give them detention for the entire first term of their second year, but, again, they _totally _had nothing to do with.) All too soon, they were boarding the horseless carriages and leaving Hogwarts for a summer. And _all_ too soon, they were boarding the train.

"Hey," said a voice in Sirius's ear as he gloomily walked up the three Hogwarts Express steps. He turned.

"Hi, Meda. Is this awful or what?" he said.

"Yeah," said Andromeda. "We'll survive. You still have Regulus."

"Yeah," said Sirius dispiritedly. "Well, see you in August."

"See you in August," replied Andromeda. They both knew Sirius's family traditionally spent August at Andromeda and her sisters' home.

"Survive," called Sirius as the crowd pulled him towards his friends.

"Survive," Andromeda called back, winking, as the crowd pulled her towards her friends.

"C'mon," said James, struggling with his baggage, "let's find a compartment before my arms fall off." And they did. (Find a compartment that is.)

"What was the 'survive' bit about?" asked Peter when they'd settled down.

"Just our way of cheering each other up," said Sirius vaguely. "Who wants to play Exploding Snap?"

They did. Game after game after game. As even Remus admitted, "It's gotta be the one game I'll never get tired of." But as the journey went on and the trees and hills turned into cities and concrete, Sirius got steadily quieter. He stopped yelling "BANG!" in a gleeful tone every time someone's cards would explode, he began losing _badly, _even to Peter_,_ and he just plain didn't seem very interested in the game anymore. Finally they wrapped up the cards and settled down to read or simply stare out the window.

"Here we go," groaned Sirius as the Express slowly began winding down. "The Summer of Torture, part one. Stay tuned for parts two, three, four, five, and six, and as soon as I turn seventeen, then you won't have to stay tuned because I will be OUT."

"Sirius, it can't – '' Remus began, but Sirius cut him off.

"It is," Sirius said, looking somewhat tired and the beginning of annoyed.

And they decided to leave it at that.

"We'd better change into Muggle clothes," sighed James. "We'll be at the station in a few minutes..." And so, (_giving in to the inevitable, _thought Sirius sadly) they did.

"We're here," said James, unable to keep excitement out of his voice. "We're home," he couldn't resist adding, and immediately hated himself for it. But Sirius didn't look particularly angered at this – he looked grim, but it was a grim determination, like a soldier going into battle.

"I've missed home," Remus decided it was all right to say. "I really have."

"Yeah, me too," agreed Peter.

Sirius remained silent, although James could have sworn he heard him mutter something like, "and I will."

"The Hogwarts Express has now reached Kings Cross," boomed a cool female voice. "Please leave the train in a cordial matter, and have a pleasant summer. Thank you and we will see you in September."

There was a great commotion, and there wasn't much time for talking as the four fought through the great big crowd. When they finally stepped off the train and looked around, they still couldn't find much to say.

"There's my mum!" cried Peter suddenly, pointing to a plump, cheerful looking woman, holding a baby to her chest. "And my dad, too – I guess – '' He faltered slightly – ''I guess this is goodbye. For the summer, at least."

"Write six times a day," warned Sirius. "Or I'll stuff you in a closet first thing when we get back to Hogwarts." He grinned wryly and the terrified look that had crept onto Peter's face melted.

"I will," he promised, looking somewhat relieved. "Bye Remus, bye James."

"See you September 1st, right here?" cleared up James.

"See you September 1st, right here," echoed Peter, then ran off to join his parents. The three Pettigrews rejoiced, then melted through the barrier.

"I'll miss the little dude," said Sirius conversationally. "He's annoying, but he's pretty cool, in his own weird way."

"Yeah," agreed Remus and James in unison. There were a few more minutes of silence, not exactly awkward, but not exactly comfortable either.

"Oh – that's my dad!" exclaimed Remus, pointing at a tall, thin man with greyed hair and a terminally tired look in his eyes, but a happy tired look, as if he'd dealt with the worse and survived. "I'll see you guys in September. And I will write, I swear."

"See you, Remus," said James.

"Have a brilliant summer," added Sirius.

And Remus rushed off to join his father, and they too melted through the barrier, where his mother was waiting.

"It's just us now," said James, shoving his hands in his pocket. "When d'ya s'pose your mum'll be here?"

"Soon," said Sirius. "Probably."

"Oh – there's my parents," said James, and he too pointed to a pair, a mother and a father, quite old looking. "C'mon, Sirius, I want you to meet them." He pulled his friend over to his parents. "Mum – Dad – I've missed you," he said quickly, "this is my best friend Sirius B – "

"Not the last name," muttered Sirius out of the corner of his mouth, stamping on James's foot.

"Sirius," James finished, eyes watering. "Sirius, this is my mum and dad."

"Hello," said Mrs. Potter, smiling at Sirius, and Sirius couldn't help but remember, resisting the temptation to laugh out loud, at the argument he and Remus had had at Christmas over madam vs. mademoiselle. He suddenly had the urge to call Mrs. Potter 'Mrs. James's Mother' or even better 'Mademoiselle Potter'. He controlled himself. (Somewhat.)

"Hello, Mrs. Ja – Mada – er, Mrs. Potter," said Sirius politely.

"James has told us much about you," said Mr. Potter, smiling warmly. "He never told us your name – James, this is– ?"

"Yes," said James quickly.

"You gave James an Invisibility Cloak," Sirius blurted out. He felt himself redden slightly, but Mr. and Mrs. Potter laughed quite gently.

"Yes," said Mr. Potter cheerfully. "And I knew he'd put it to good use – did you play any pranks?"

"_Henry,_" admonished Mrs. Potter, and the next few minutes passed with all three Potters, and Sirius too, talking comfortably and excitedly about the year's events. Sirius, oddly enough, felt very comfortable with them – definitely more comfortable than he ever felt with his family. In fact, despite the whole going-home-for-the-summer part, he began to feel pretty cheerful. That was, until..

"Oh _no_," muttered Sirius suddenly.

"What?" muttered James back, knowing somehow that Sirius wouldn't want James's parents hearing this.

"Mum," whispered Sirius. "James, seriously no offense, but she'll probably kill me – and possibly you – if she sees me with you, so I've gotta split. I'll see you next September, all right?"

"All right," agreed James. "Bye. And – " He couldn't quite word what he wanted to say. "Oh – I can't believe I forgot this – which one's your mum, where is she?"

"Right there," said Sirius, gesturing but not quite pointing to a tall black haired woman, just coming out of the barrier, who resembled Sirius painfully, but in a strangely twisted way.

"Right – take this," said James, thrusting Sirius a small package wrapped in paper. "Hide it, don't let anyone see it, but open it as soon as you can. I've explained inside. And.." James searched for a way to word his goodbyes, "Don't let them get you down," he whispered. "And write. All the time."

"Six times a day and you better write back," promised/warned Sirius. "All right, James, I'll see you."

"See you."

And Sirius went to join his mother – and in his opinion, begin a Summer of Torture.

* * *

** A/N: Nobody die of shock, please. :) Yes, I have updated twice in the same month. Record, for this story. It's in honor of the DH movie, which I WATCHED! It was UTTERLY FANTASTIC! WHO AGREES? Tell me, in a review :P  
**

**Oh yeah, and give me your opinion on Regulus/Sirius/brotherly awesomeness, will you? Thaaaaaaaaaanks.**


	19. Letters

Chapter Nineteen

Letters

_June 17__th_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ Hi, it's me, Remus. It's the second day of summer break and I have to say I'm getting used to staying up till dawn reading and sleeping till noon! My summer's been great so far. I don't really have much to say because nothing's really happened. So how are you faring? Write back soon, and don't let your parents get you down._

_ Sincerely,_

_ Remus

* * *

_

_ June 17__th_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ Hi, it's me, Peter. How are you doing? I'm good. Gess what, I have a little sister. She was born three weeks ago. Mum wrote me but I must've forgoten because it was kinda a shock to see her. Her name is Anastasia Pettigrew and she's so cute. How is your summer going?_

_ From,_

_ Peter

* * *

_

_ June 17__th_

_ Hey Sirius,_

_ Yo, it's me, James. How you been doing? You still alive? I'm good, I suppose, but pretty bored. Hey, do you think you could come over anytime soon? If not maybe we could meet up in Diagon Alley in the last week of summer. I don't really want to think that far ahead though because I'm loving the sleeping late part. _

_ Hope you're good, please write back soon._

_ -James_

_ PS: Why didn't you let me tell my mum and dad your last name? I haven't, but I'm just wondering.

* * *

_

_ June 20th_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ You never responded to my letter. Not to be a nag, but are you okay?_

_ -Remus

* * *

_

_ June 24th_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ How come you're not ansering?_

_ -Peter

* * *

_

_ June 26th_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ What's up?_

_ -James

* * *

_

_ June 30th_

_ Dear James,_

_ Have you heard from Sirius?_

_ -Remus

* * *

_

_ July 1st_

_ Dear Remus,_

_ No, I haven't, and neither has Peter. It's been almost two weeks. I'm getting a little bit worried. Dya think he's okay?_

_ -James

* * *

_

_ June 3rd_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ Are you alive?_

_ -Remus

* * *

_

_ June 4th_

_ Dear Remus,_

_ Still nothing from Sirius?_

_ -Peter

* * *

_

_ July 2nd_

_ Dear Sirius,_

_ WHERE ARE YOU?_

_ -James

* * *

_

_ July 7th_

_ Peter, James, Sirius – I'm sending this owl three ways,_

_ I'm still alive and that's about it._

_ All right, all right, it's not that dire. Mum hasn't lain a hand on me but that's pretty much all she hasn't done. She, and Dad too, as soon as I got out of Kings' Cross, it was all grumble grumble grumble lecture lecture lecture how could you go in Gryffindor shame of my flesh associating with Mugggle -borns (but believe me that's not how they said it) and blood traitors and half wits and half-bloods and BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. DO YOU KNOW HOW ANNOYING THIS IS? I will_ _go insane. Still, I'm alive. And sane for the most._

_ Ugh, gotta go, Mum's coming. She'll KILL me if she sees me writing to you guys. I know I don't write back much (because I have to make sure no one actually sees me writing to you or else I am DEAD DEAD DEAD) but please please PLEASE keep writing. You guys are the reason I am still sane._

_ -Sirius_

_ PS: James, that two way mirror you gave me is awesome. Sorry I wasn't able to use it. I will soon._

_ -S.B_

**

* * *

A/N: Okay I SWEAR I'd already put this one up...s'pose not...**

** But WOAH, three chapters in one month! :O I shall try to get them back to school by December, and I shall wrap up a few important things by New Years. :) YOU ALL KNOW WHAT IMPORTANT THINGS HAPPEN IN SECOND YEAR!**

** ...Ah, how I torture poor Remus.**

**Oh yeah, and all the spelling/grammar errors in Peter's letters were intentional. 'Cause I hate the kid. :P**

**REVIEW! First two reviewers get a sneak preview of the next chapter..hm? HMMMM?  
**


	20. A Black Summer

Chapter Twenty

A Black Summer

"GALLIVANTING WITH MUDBLOODS AND BLOOD TRAITORS AFTER DARING TO BE SORTED ANYWHERE AWAY FROM THE NOBLE HOUSE – ''

" – THE PROCLAIMED BLOOD TRAITORS AND MUDBLOODS ARE FORTY TIMES THE PEOPLE YOU'LL EVER BE, FORTY TIMES THE PEOPLE ANY OF YOU WILL EVER BE – ''

"DON'T YOU_ DARE _TALK BACK AT ME, I AM YOUR MOTHER, SIRIUS ORION BLACK – ''

"_DON'T – CALL – ME – THAT!"_

_ "AND WHY NOT?"_

_ "BECAUSE IT REMINDS ME OF THIS STUPID HOUSE THAT I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE A PART OF ANYMORE!"_

_ "YOU BLOOD TRAITOR! TRAITOR, SHAME OF THE FAMILY, YOU – ''_

_ "I WISH I COULD RUN AWAY AND NEVER, EVER COME BACK! I WOULDN'T BE SORRY IF I NEVER SAW YOUR FACES AGAIN!"_

_ "I'D SEND YOU OUT JUST AS FAST AS YOU'D GO, AS YOU VERY WELL KNOW! DON'T COUNT ON LIVING HERE ANY LONGER THAN THE DAY YOU TURN SEVENTEEN!__"_

_"LIKE I'LL STICK AROUND THAT LONG! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU ALL!"_

_ "_DON'T – YOU _– EVER – _SAY THAT TO ME AGAIN!"

"_I'LL SAY WHATEVER I WANT TO YOU!"_

_** "**__GET – OUT – OF – MY – SIGHT! I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOU ANYMORE! __**YOU ARE NO SON OF MINE, YOU BRAT!" **_Walburga Black screamed.

Sirius opened his mouth, closed it again, opened it, and snapped it shut. "FINE!" he yelled, slamming down his fork and storming from the breakfast table. "FINE!"

"WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?" yelled Sirius's mother.

"FOR A WALK!" he shouted back. And, making sure to slam the door, he left the musty air of 12 Grimmauld Place.

* * *

After storming through the streets feeling sorry for himself for a few minutes, Sirius began to calm down slightly. He realized that he _could _possibly have controlled the situation better, and identified the fact that he did not _have _to have yelled back, and even though the whole situation was entirely his mother's fault, he _could _have helped it slightly.

_I sound like Remus, _he realized. The thought gave him a small smile.

Sirius heaved a great sigh. Now he'd have to go back to 12 Grimmauld place, back to his – house – (he thought calling it 'home' was just stupid, as it was _not _his home) and probably yelled at if for another three hours, and now that he'd lectured himself he'd at least know better than to yell back, but that would just probably make it worse and harder to get through.

He spotted a small, abandoned playground. _What the heck, why not, _he thought. _Beats going back. _He vaulted the fence and looked around. He had distant memories of Andromeda and her sisters bringing him and Regulus here, and of how the three sisters usually sat on the swings, talking, leaving the two younger boys to their own devices. That had changed once Andromeda got into Hogwarts, into Ravenclaw, began "associating with people 'beneath them'" as it was put. Bellatrix would mostly ignore her, and even Narcissa would be more distant. Andromeda would insist that she didn't care, that she didn't even really like her sisters anymore, but Sirius knew the truth, about how she might cry at night for something Bellatrix had said to her, about how she truly _missed _her sisters. It was because of their – loss – Sirius supposed, that he and Meda had come so close.

He sat down on one of the swings now, not really swinging, just sitting, contemplating how bad he had it, feeling very sorry indeed for himself.

Suddenly a clash of thunder filled the air and the skies split open and it was raining. "Oh no," groaned Sirius. "Oh _no._"

He took a moment to examine his situation.

It was raining.

He was outside and it was raining.

He _hated _rain, might _possibly _even be afraid of it, it was raining and he was outside.

One solution was staring him in the face: run.

He supposed, looking back, the rational solution would be to get back to his house, but he was not feeling particularly rational at this point in time. Sirius hated rain. He _may _have been afraid of it. But no, because he was Sirius, he wasn't afraid of _anything._

But he hated it.

So he ran.

He tore away in the direction opposite his house and he ran and ran, desperate to get away, to get out of this madness, out of the rain and thunder and lightening. He ran and ran and ran, for a full five minutes he did nothing but run..

Then he slowed down and realized, staring up at the pouring sky, how stupid he was.

How utterly, completely _stupid _he was.

"Why didn't I go back?" he muttered. "I'm an idiot, an idiot, a stupid idiot. Now I don't even know where I am."

Suddenly, a cloaked figure came tearing through the shadows. "SIRIUS!" the figure shouted. For one heart stopping moment Sirius thought it was that Voldemort thingy, that evil wizard that had been rumored to have risen the year before, the one that his parents spoke of so highly, which _had _to mean he was no good – but no, it wasn't Voldemort, he knew that voice.

"Regulus," he croaked, voice coated with relief. "Reggie."

The figure approached him, threw off the cloak it was wearing and shoved it to him. Sirius firmly shoved it back. "You're younger," he found himself saying. "You wear it. Come on, let's head back."

Regulus shook his head and held his arms tight around himself. "Take the cloak."

Sirius heaved a sigh. "I don't need it."

"You're afraid of rain," snapped Regulus. "Put it on."

Sirius glared at his brother.

"I am _not _afraid of rain."

"Yes you are," declared Regulus. "Put. It. On."

"What is there to be afraid of rain?" Sirius demanded, getting seriously annoyed now.

"I have no idea, I just know you're afraid of it! Put on the cloak, Sirius, please. Let's go home."

"It's not home," muttered Sirius, but he took the cloak from his brother at another crash of thunder, wrapped it around himself, and the brothers ran as fast as their legs could carry them.

* * *

"YOU DARE WALK AWAY FROM ME, GO AND COME BACK SOPPING WET, RAINDROPS ALL OVER MY CARPET, HOW DARE YOU, HOW DARE YOU, HOW DARE YOU – "

Sirius opened his mouth to yell back, but at an almost pleading look from Regulus, obviously silently saying, _Don't do it, don't do it, please just let her be, it'll be over sooner that way, _he took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and said nothing.

Mrs. Black seemed to grow somewhat larger. It was a frightening effect. She continued to yell, to scream, to rage, but once she ran out of fuel, about five minutes later, she stormed out of the hallway in which a few minutes ago her sons had entered, sopping wet and rather cold at that.

"Well, that could've gone better," said Sirius after a moment. He and Regulus laughed and went to dry themselves off.

The day was a quiet one. Sirius locked himself in his room, shut and curtained all the windows, and spent it on his own, reading and rereading letters from his friends, writing and rewriting letters to his friends, and shooting sparks out of his wand. He also did something that would, to the unknowing eye, look quite crazy. He spoke for a long, long time into a handheld mirror.

Finally, at one thirty in the morning, after he'd put away the mirror and worn out his wand for the time being, he grew bored. He unlocked his bedroom door and got into bed, trying very hard not to listen to the rain outside.

After lying in bed for approximately three hours, once again feeling sorry for himself, he finally got used to holding three pillows over his ears to block out the noise, and he was just about to fall off to sleep when..

"Sirius?" Someone was poking him.

"AHHHHH– oh. It's you. Don't _do _that, Reggie!" Sirius screamed, said in relief, then added threateningly.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay," said Regulus softly.

"Of course I'm okay," snapped Sirius. "Why wouldn't I be okay?"

"Because you're afraid of rain," said Regulus simply.

"I am _not,_" snapped Sirius. "Regulus, are you _ever _going to let that go?"

"No, because I never let go of the truth."

"It's a _lie, _Regulus. I'm _not _afraid of rain. That's stupid."

"Then how come your windows are closed and curtained?" challenged Regulus.

"It's the middle of the night," snapped Sirius. "Or the morning, depending on how you look at it."

"And your point is?"

"Regulus, who in their right mind sleeps with their windows open?"

"You're not sleeping."

Sirius cast his mind around for an excuse for this. He found none, so instead simply opted for saying, "I am not afraid of rain."

Regulus thought for a few moments. He calculated what he wanted to know by Sirius's strengths and weaknesses, his weaknesses and strengths, and the amount of love (a fair amount) and tolerance (nearly none) the brothers had for each other. WIWTK+SSAW+RSSAW+LAT...equals..

A one word solution sprang to Regulus's mind. _Hypothetical._

"In a – _hypothetical _– situation," he said carefully, "if someone – not _you _– was afraid of rain, why do you think he or she would be? Hypothetically."

Sirius sighed. He knew exactly what Regulus wanted. He supposed it couldn't hurt to.._share._

"Hypothetically," said Sirius through gritted teeth, "someone would – could – be afraid of rain because..because.." He heaved a sigh. "This is all hypothetical, Reg."

"Yes, of course it is."

"_All _of it."

"Yup."

"All right," sighed Sirius. "And it's rude to make fun of hypothetical boys, so don't."

"I wont," said Regulus solemnly. "Promise."

"Pretend – hypothetically – that there's a hypothetical young boy," said Sirius carefully. "And when this hypothetical young boy was..four years old, I think – er, if he was thinking back, he would think – let's call this boy..."

"How about, 'Sob'?" suggested Regulus, stringing together his brother's initials.

"How about 'Bob'," said Sirius firmly. "So this, Bob, when he was four years old he was downright terrified of rain. And this was because, you know, he was four. And when he listened to the pound pound pound of rain against his windowsill, he was, understandably, terrified, because he thought it was some evil monster or something like that. So I – Bob – ran to his mum's room, and told her his fears, but his mother was rather mean. She told him that – '" Sirius glanced at his brother. "What's Bob's last name?"

"White," said Regulus promptly.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "All right then. She told him that.._Whites.._don't cry and they weren't afraid of anything. She then proceeded to take Mr. White and also Bob's little brother, Regu – er, Tommy, yes, and go out to some function or the other, thereby leaving me – Bob – with the House Elf Kreacher – erm, Creature. Who, of course, didn't really pay any attention to Bob. And Bob was left all alone, and he was terrified to the point where he thought the _world _was ending. And as Bob grew up, he realized that rain wasn't actually anything to be afraid of, but the fear stuck, because rain reminded him of that awful night where he was left all alone with no one.." Sirius rolled his eyes. "Bob is a moron. He really is."

"I – ah, Tommy – sure doesn't think Bob is a moron," said Regulus. "He thinks that rain is a pretty darn legitimate fear, particularly with the reasoning behind it."

Sirius stared at the ceiling, lost in thought for a few moments. "Bob isn't afraid of anything," he said softly. "He's Sirius Black – I mean Bob White."

"Who says Bob can't be afraid sometimes?" asked Regulus haughtily. "Everyone's afraid of something. It's just how it works."

Sirius twisted over and smiled at Regulus. "You know, Reg, you're kind of awesome."

"So are you," said Regulus, smiling back.

"Maybe you'll even be in Gryffindor," added Sirius hopefully.

Regulus licked his lips. In truth, he was afraid of, more than anything, not being accepted. He wanted to be accepted by his mother and father, he wanted them to be proud of him.

But he wanted Sirius to be proud, too.

"Maybe Ravenclaw," was what he said. "Like Meda. It's kind of a midline, you know..Mum wouldn't really.." He hesitated.

"Mum _would _hate you," said Sirius, the darkness returning to his voice. "She hates Meda, they all do."

"That's just 'cos she's dating Ted."

"Partially, Regulus. It's partially because of the Ravenclaw thing."

"Oh..but Siri..I don't want Mum to...to hate me."

"But you'll have me, Reg." Sirius laughed quietly. "Listen to us, Reg, going on about Houses like it matters. I'll love you no mater what House you're in, I promise. And anyway, we don't have to worry about it, because you're not going for a year."

"But..but.."

"What?"

"But what if I'm in Slytherin, like everyone else?" whispered Regulus, voicing a fear that had been nagging at him all year, ever since he'd watched his mother screaming her lungs out into the red letter. "Will we change, Sirius?"

Sirius paused. "We might," he said truthfully. "It'll be..harder, I guess, to be as close as we are now..so yes, if you're in Slytherin, it'll change. But only a little bit. And you'll always be my brother, Reg."

Regulus smiled. "Promise?"

"Promise," said Sirius sleepily.

Regulus left the room, leaving the door slightly open. Sirius smiled to himself and flipped onto his side.

I suppose, mused Sirius, that summer isn't _completely _horrible..

There was a quiver of thunder and the sound of rain falling thicker, heavier on to the ground.

Sirius sighed. Or maybe it is.

* * *

**A/N: HEY GUYS! GASP! Two chapters in one day! :O About this one..I just dunno. I did it over the summer after some _intense _writers' block. Really. So I decided to just say - what the heck, make it sappy. Hope you all enjoyed! REVIEW!**

**Oh yes, and special thanks to the wonderful wonderful wonderful Jezabel Raewin. And also _stina whatever. _Thanks millions, guys! :D  
**


	21. Diagon Alley

Chapter Twenty One

Diagon Alley

"JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMES! OVVEEER HERREEE!"

James Potter looked up from the Quality Quidditch Supplies window, where he was admiring the brand new broom, the Nimbus 1900. To his shock, he saw Sirius, accompanied by a tall girl he recognized as Andromeda, waving wildly and calling him name.

"_Sirius!_" he cried happily. He turned from the window, cut through the crowd, and tore over to his friend.

"FINALLY!" yelled Sirius. "I'VE BEEN SO DEAD!" He circled around James in a crazy dance.

"WHAT DID YA THINK OF THE TWO-WAY-MIRROR? Hi Andromeda how was your summer," James yelled and added.

"IT WAS AWESOME! IT SAVED MY LIFE!" yelled Sirius back.

"WILL YOU TWO STOP _SHOUTING.._YOU'RE RIGHT _NEXT _TO EACH OTHER! Oh, also: Hi there James, my summer was good thanks."

Sirius and James stared at Andromeda. All three of them burst out laughing.

"Meda brought me here," said Sirius happily. He laughed. "Mum was pretty glad to get rid of us.."

James laughed as well. "Guess what," he said excitedly.

"YOU WON A MILLION GALLEONS AND YOU'RE GONNA SHARE HALF!" shouted Sirius, jumping in the air.

James looked at Andromeda suspiciously. "Did you give him sugar?"

"No," insisted Andromeda, "he got it all by himself."

"YOU'RE GONNA GET THE BEST BROOMSTICK EVER!" shouted Sirius. "AND YOU'RE GONNA SHARE HALF!"

"No.."

"YOU'RE GONNA MARRY LILY EVANS! AND YOU'RE GONNA SH – "

"_Shut up!" _hissed James, turning a rosy shade of red as Andromeda and Sirius dissolved in laughter. "You know what I'm just gonna tell you. You know we were batting around letters saying that we might meet up at Diagon Alley, but then you left for your aunt and uncle's house so we couldn't talk to you?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, we made plans, and Remus and Peter are gonna be here at Florean Fortescue at three o'clock – which is..in ten minutes!"

"AWESOME!" said Sirius happily. "We'll have a Marauder reunion. And then I'll see you guys again in four days, and it'll be AWESOME." It was the twenty eighth, so there were four days left till school began again.

"And I," spoke up Andromeda, "am meeting Maryna and Ted in front of Ollivander's, also in ten minutes. So can I just leave you two, then, and Sirius, I'll meet you in front of Quality Quidditch Supplies at half five?"

"All right," agreed Sirius. "Have fun with _Teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeddyy!" _He and James burst into laughter as Andromeda turned tomato red and whacked them both over the head. She waved goodbye to them and hurried away.

"Florean Fortescue's, then?" said James when Andromeda had disappeared.

"I think we need to make a detour.." said Sirius, a wicked glint in his eyes.

* * *

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEMUUUSSSSSSSS! OVEEEEEEEER HEEERE!"

"_PETER_! GETTTT OVVVER HERE!"

Remus and Peter hurried over to the table where their friends were yelling and wildly shaking their arms, grinning like they hadn't all summer. Peter was looking much fatter than last year, whereas Remus was looking much thinner, paler, tireder, and generally weaker.

"What happened to_ you?" _said James bluntly when Remus sat down.

"Been a little bit ill," mumbled Remus. "Might've caught something from Mum."

"Aw, poor you," said Sirius sympathetically. "Is it life threatening?"

"No!" said Remus, looking alarmed.

"Is what your mum has life threatening?"

"I'm pretty sure that sentence is poorly constructed," said Remus loudly.

"No, I don't think so and I don't care," said Sirius. "Is your Mum going to – '"

Just then, Peter made a slight diversion by turning into a duck.

"QQQQUAAAAAAAAK!" he screamed angrily while his friends dissolved in helpless laughter. Within ten seconds Peter reappeared, looking highly disgruntled.

"Just our little joke," chortled James, speaking on the behalf of himself and Sirius. "We stopped at the joke store – look at this." He pulled something with a flourish from Peter's chair. It was what appeared to be a small, deep purple button. "Instant transformation into any creature you think of for about ten seconds. I wish I could just buy a lifetime supply, then I'd never have to take another Transfiguration class in my life.." His eyes misted over.

"Oh come on, Transfiguration isn't _that _bad.." said Remus loyally.

"Only a nerd like _you _would say that, Remus," said Sirius, unable to resist. Remus was ready, as usual, with a retaliation.

"Only a moron like _you _would say _that, _Sirius."

"Only a geek – "

"Only an immature – '"

"Only a _mature –_ "

"Oh, my peaceful spell of the absence of Remus and Sirius's arguments is over," said James, facing the sky. "What are we gonna _do _with them, Peter?"

Peter laughed. He and James lay back in their seats and watched their two best friends quarrel.

Florean Fortescue came by at last. "May I take your orders?"

"Can I get a chocolate sundae with everything hold the cherry," said Peter.

"Can I get a mixed bowl with nothing but the cherry," said James.

They both looked at Remus and Sirius, who were still going at it, yelling insane insults that didn't actually make much sense at each other.

"OI! SIRIUS! REMUS! I'M GONNA EAT YOUR ICE CREAM!" shouted James at last.

The two quieted immediately.

"By the way, Peter," said James after a moment, "why the heck were you thinking about ducks?"

Peter went red. "Um, ah, er.."

Remus smiled.

The Marauders were back in business.

* * *

**A/N: Hi guys! Woah, is this the fourth in one month? - Faints from shock -**

**- is revived by reviews -**

**See what the power of positive thinking, _ummm, _I mean reviews, can do? FOUR. WHOLE. CHAPTERS. In one thirty day month. :D **

**Thanks everyone, so so so so much. You're all so...lovely!**

**Review! :D  
**


	22. September 1st, 1972

Chapter Twenty Two  
September 1st, 1972

"Mum, Mum! There they are!"

"Oh, I see them. Lovely."

"Meda, there they are!"

"Oh, I see them. Ahg, another year of insanity."

"You liked the part where we put a sheep in Bella's bag."

"...Fine."

"Dad, that's them!"

"Oh, I see them. Fantastic."

"Mum, Dad! Look, look!"

"What are we looking at?"

"My _friends!"_

Platform 9¾ was swarming with people. Reuniting children, tearful mothers, bustling fathers, and even a rather disgruntled House Elf.

"JAMMEEEES!" yelled Sirius. Andromeda, looking melodramatically pained, bid him goodbye and boarded the train. Sirius ran over to his friend.

"Hi Mrs and Mr Potter," he said, breathing hard.

"Mum, Dad, you remember my friend, Sirius Bl – "

Sirius, looking frightened suddenly, kicked James hard in the ankle.

"Sirius," James corrected himself, eyes watering in pain.

"Hello, Sirius," said Mrs. Potter, smiling. "It's lovely to see you again."

"You too," said Sirius.

"How was your holiday?" asked Mr. Potter.

"Horrible," said Sirius. "But thanks for asking."

There was a moment of awkward silence.

"Oh," said Mrs Potter finally. "All right then."

"I'm gonna go to The Spot," announced Sirius after a bit. "Catch up in a sec, James."

"The Spot?" repeated James.

"Yeah, the one we all said 'meet back here in September' to, remember?" said Sirius impatiently.

"Oh yeah. That. Meet you there in a couple minutes, then."

"All right. Bye Mr., Mrs. Potter. Hope to see you next September."

"Goodbye." And with that Sirius made his way off, leaving James to bid his tearful parents farewell.

Remus and Peter hadn't arrived at the Spot yet. So Sirius waited. He paced. He dreamed up wild pranks. He yelled out hellos to people he knew. And finally...

"REEMUS!"

"PETERR!"

"SIIIRIUS!"

"JAMEESSS!"

It was a strange sight, if you think about it, to see four boys jumping up and down in joy, yelling wildly at each other and punching each other's shoulders.

But, Sirius mused as they shoved their way on to the train, that's just what the Marauders do when they're back together, and going home. At last.

* * *

The four finally found a compartment at the very front, a small one that held them, their luggage, and their pets – Peter's toad, Tommy, Remus's cat that he had just bought in Diagon Alley four days before, Romulus, James's owl, Scoop, and Sirius's owl, Godric ("named to annoy my mother" as he said.)

"What kind of a name is Romulus?" said James, one they'd all squashed themselves and their animals in. Remus had taken home his cat nameless, saying he'd tell them what he'd chosen on the train.

Remus looked surprised. "Haven't you guys ever heard the legend of Ancient Rome?"

"For the thousandth time," said Sirius patiently, "we are not nerds. You are a nerd. That is why you know insane obscure facts that no one particularly cares about."

Remus rolled his eyes. "I was actually _educated _before I went to Hogwarts," he informed Sirius. "Home educated." That was, actually, only after he was Bitten. Before that he went to normal school..

But they didn't have to know that.

Sirius stuck his tongue out at his friend. " I was, too. It's not _my _fault all the professors ran screaming from the house. Now tell us the story about Japan, or whatever."

"Rome," corrected Remus.

"What_ever._"

"Well, I'm a bit rusty on it, but I know most of the bare facts. Roman ancient legend has it," began Remus, petting Romulus, who purred lazily, "that there were once two brothers, Remus and Romulus, who were raised by wolves."

"Were they, like, werewolves?" interrupted Sirius rudely.

Remus paled. "N-no, they definitely weren't werewolves," he stammered slightly before getting back on track. "Um. Where was I?"

"Two boys, raised by wolves," said Peter, speaking for the first time.

"Oh yeah. And so the wolf raised them.."

Suddenly Sirius burst out laughing. "Raised...by...wolves," he gasped. "My tutor..Professor Loquestra..always asked me..if I WAS RAISED BY WOLVES! IF ONLY SHE KNEW!" He erupted into uproarious laughter.

Remus stared at him, with the familiar expression of half-amusement, half-exasperation, half-annoyance that his friends had donned 'the Sheep look' on account of the first time he had pulled it was the memorable time Andromeda had pulled a sheep from her bag. "Yes, Sirius, that is where the saying comes from."

Sirius straightened. "Killjoy!" he accused.

"How am I – oh, forget it. Well, anyhow, the two brothers finally left their 'mother' – the wolf – and went out into the world. They decided to build a city, and got into a fight over who was to be king. In the end, Romulus killed Remus and built Rome on his grave."

It was James's turn to burst out laughing. "You're gonna get killed by your cat!"

Remus rolled his eyes.

There was no teaching a Marauder.

* * *

"We're here! We're here!"

"Hogwarts! Hogwarts!"

"Finally!"

"_Home!_"

Everyone was ecstatic when the train stopped. They scrambled off the train at breakneck speed, and barely even noticed the absence of the loud, booming yell of the gamekeeper, Ogg's, shouting "First years this way! First years here!"

Peter stopped dead in his tracks as they approached the carriages.

"_Ugh!_" he cried. "What _are _those _things _leading the carriages?" Peter looked terrified, utterly repulsed, and slightly sick.

Remus, Sirius, and James looked.

And looked.

And looked some more.

And saw..

"There's nothing there," said James, slightly disturbed.

"No – there is!" insisted Peter. "Look! Huge – black – winged horses!"

"Wait a second," said Remus. "This is gonna sound so weird – but just answer it, all right, Peter, please? With no objection? I'll explain in a second.."

Peter agreed.

"All right. Um..Peter..have you..seen anyone..um..die?"

Peter looked startled. "How'd you know?" he asked wildly.

"Just answer, Peter."

Peter bowed his head. "My granddad," he said softly. "He had cancer for fifty years. Since he was three. And then one day, after a relapse, he just.." He broke off and turned his face. He looked at his friends again after a moments, voice choked. "He was there, on the hospital bed..and he just..shut down. I was eight."

"I'm sorry," said Remus, touching his friend's arm.

"It was a long time ago," muttered Peter, going rather red. "So – why can I see – those – things?"

"Thestrals," said Sirius, before Remus could answer, leaving him looking slightly miffed. "I read about them in this freaky book about Dark creatures one time..correct me if I'm wrong..you can only see them if you're dead?"

"Not exactly," Remus forced a laugh. "Peter's alive, isn't he? No..you can only see him if you've seen death."

They got on to the carriage without saying much.

* * *

"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts!"

The awkwardness had melted away as soon as they'd burst through the doors and Dumbledore had begun his speech. The four grinned at each other.

"I hope your heads are nice and empty, so we can fill them all up again! Now before you are befuddled by our wonderful feast, I have a few things of what I daresay are importance..

"First of all, I am sorry to say that Ogg, our gamekeeper, has decided to retire in order to spend some more time with mother, who, I believe, is not very pleased at him for the little episode last year with the nifflers.."

There was a short amount of tittering, but for the most part a stony silence, as everyone liked Ogg quite a bit.

"However, I am pleased to announce that his assistant, who we all know, Rubeus Hagrid, will be taking over!"

Uproarious applause filled the hall. Everyone _really _liked Hagrid, except for the Slytherins, but they didn't count because they didn't like ANYONE, really. Hagrid stood up, face ruby red, looking happier than he'd ever looked before.

"My second article of news is that, unfortunately, our Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Gridley, was sent to Azkaban over the summer for improper treatment of thestrals."

There was stifled applause and cheers. Everyone hated Professor Gridley, who couldn't actually teach at all.

"To be replaced by Professor Tanarm." A tall, slender man with eyes cold as ice, grey as stone, and harder than marble, a smile that did not reach them, and blood red gloves which he did not take off, stood up and bowed as polite applause filled the Hall.

"I've heard of him," muttered Remus. "_Where have I heard of him?_"

"He used to work at the Ministry of Magic," whispered Peter. "With my dad, before my dad quit and became a worker at Gringotts. In the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Beasts. All I know about him is that he's _really _dead set against werewolves. He wants them outlawed. One of them killed his wife this one time."

Remus felt all the color drain from his face. Suddenly, he had a very, very bad feeling about the rest of the year.

"My final note is not a happy one," said Dumbledore, the twinkle in his eye fading ever so slightly. "As we all know, Lord Voldemort has risen to power."

There were several flinches and one person even shrieked.

"Fear of a name only increases fear of object," said Dumbledore gently. "Now, danger is arising. No student is to be on grounds unsupervised, and everyone is to be in bed or their common room by curfew. I want everyone to be on guard and careful. And for your own safety, there will be _serious consequences _for those who disobey these rules."

There was a solemn silence.

"Now – _tuck in._"

Food appeared in platters on the table. And as everyone ate, and later pushed up to the familiar, circular dormitory, all the seriousness and worries and anti-werewolfness of the dinner melted away as they burst back into their room, safe and warm and full and..

and home.

* * *

**A/N: Please don't die of shock, guys :P Yeah, two chapters in one night, yeah yeah yeah, who kidnapped Bittersweet x and replaced her with this strange updating model, yeah yeah yeah I get the point (and I'm totally not Bittersweet x's evil twin sister Isabelle who lives in Perutartica (a mysterious mix of Peru and Antarctica) and is obsessed upon obsessed with updating..definitely not..). SO. Couple things:**

**- Peter bashing will decrease ever so slightly. He WAS a Marauder, albeit an annoying traitorous jerk of one, but yeah, a Marauder. So, I'll still be mean to him, because what's life without being mean to Peter Pettigrew? But, he will play a..somewhat..larger role in this story.  
**

**-Hagrid! Voldemort! Mean professors! MWAHAHAHHAHHH! The role they will play in this story...**

**-Prepare yourself for a majorly, majorly, majorly huge cliffhanger for the end of the next chapter! MWAHAHAHAHHHHHH - cough, cough.**

**-THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS!  
**


	23. Surprise

** A/N: Hey all, the next few chapters get a tad more serious, just lettin' you know..mwahahahh...**

Chapter Twenty Three

First Day of Second Year

"New course schedules, new course schedules! Second years over here!"

Frank Longbottom, the fifth year Prefect, was standing in the middle of the Great Hall the next day when the Gryffindors came in, yawning, for breakfast.

"Excellent," said Remus happily, accepting his and passing three more to his friends. "New schedules."

"Why are you happy?" grumbled Sirius as he took his. "Classes, ugh."

"This is going to be a very good year," said Remus confidently. "I _know _it."

"No it isn't!" said Peter suddenly. "We're gonna have Professor Tanarm!"

"So?" said James, who was attempting to keep an open mind.

"He's _mean!" _insisted Peter. "He's the reason my dad quit, he was so mean and bossy and like an adult Snape or something! And he's our _teacher!"_

Remus paused. "Well, other then Defense Against the Dark Arts, this year is going to be _very _good," he said, but it was in a much less confident tone of voice, and it was with a defeated air as he walked to the breakfast table with his friends.

"And look here..double Defense first thing today,," said Sirius gloomily. "Isn't this shaping out to be a fantastic morning."

"It's just two hours," said James bracingly. "We can survive two hours. It's not like any of us are werewolves, so Tanarm has nothing against us." Sirius and Peter laughed. Remus managed to muster a weak chuckle, forcing back the horrible thoughts erupting in his brain.

_It doesn't mean anything. _

_ They don't have to find out._

"Owls," said Peter, pointing to the sudden hailstorm of winged creatures above. "I'm pretty sure Mum is sending something in the mail, something I forgot.."

"Of course," intoned James seriously. "Maybe your brain." The friends laughed, even Peter joining in good naturedly.

A letter landed on each Marauder's plate, even Sirius's. Remus, Peter, and James each tore their's open and read them in silence.

"Just checking if I'm all right," said James as he set his down.

"Apparently I left home my Defense book," said Peter, sounding mystified.

"I have to visit Mum again on Friday," sighed Remus.

They all looked at Sirius, who was looking at the letter warily, as if perhaps it might explode. As it was a bright shade of green, not the deep red of a Howler, this was somewhat unlikely.

Sirius took a breath to steady himself, then tore it open. As his eyes traveled across the page, he began to smile. It was in Regulus's hand.

_Dear Sirius, _the letter went.

_Hi, it's me Regulus. How was your first evening in Hogwarts? It's pretty boring back home, to tell the truth. All there is to do is listen to Mum yell, yell, yell and watch Dad rustle his paper. PLEASE come back for Christmas. Did I mention? BELLA'S over. Now that she's out of school apparently she'll be spending lots of time over, and YOU know how horrible she is._

_ Please please PLEASE come home for Christmas._

_ Write back soon,_

_ your brother,_

_Regulus A. Black  
_"It's from Regulus," explained Sirius. "My brother. He kept me from going _mad _this summer..so..yeah. That's good."

"This year _will _be good," declared Remus.  
He said it in a voice that seemed to say, or else.

–

"Welcome to your second year of Defense Against the Dark Arts. In this classroom, this year, you will learn things, see things, that will change the way your little minds work. Anyone who does not wish to be familiar with the gruesome and horrors of life is permitted to leave right now, to the small price of a failure."

Professor Tanarm ended this jolly piece of news with a rather scary stare around the eleven and twelve year old Gryffindors and Slytherins sitting in the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. He sat down at his desk and began to look up and down the roll call. His lip curled slightly and it was with a slightly sarcastic lilt he said the first name.

"A Gryffindor, is it? ..Black, Sirius?"

"Yes, sir," said Sirius stonily.

"I see..Brimstone, Johnathon?"

"Here."

"Charcot, Lenny?"

"Here."

"Evans, Lily?"

"Here, sir."

The following name went on with interruption – until Remus's name was reached about partway through..

"Ah..Remus Lupin," said Professor Tanarm, lip curling fiercely. "You are, I hear, grievously ill?"

Sirius watched, slightly confused, as all the color went from Remus's face. "I think you are mistaken, Sir," Remus said, voice shaking slightly.

"Am I?" said Professor Tanarm, walking slightly closer to Remus. "Am I _really _mistaken? For instance, could you tell me where you happen to be going this weekend?"

Remus had now gone so white that you could see veins. "My mother is ill," he said in a voice just barely kept steady. "I have to visit her."

"And what is this illness so deeply grievous that you must leave school and go _see _her?"

Remus looked about three seconds away from a) having a nervous breakdown b) dying c) bursting into tears.

So Sirius did what any friend would do.

"His mother is sick," he said loudly. "She's been sick for practically a whole year now. How can you just stand there demanding information?"

"Yeah," James pitched in, "what does that have to do with Defense anyways?"

"Y-y-_yeah!" _declared Peter, absolutely terrified but feeling very determined. "His m-mum's sick! Leave him alone!"

There was a terrified silence. Hardly anyone dared to breathe.

"Let's see," said Professor Tanarm in a terrifying voice. "Fifty points for Gryffindor and a detention apiece for Pettigrew, Potter, and.._Black._" It was again with a sarcastic lilt he said _Black._

Sirius decided he'd gone far enough, why not go all the way? "Yes, I'm a Black," he said loudly. "Get over it."

There was a gasp. Professor Tanarm looked more than terrifying now. He could breathe fire and no one would be particularly surprised.

"An additional thirty five points from _Gryffindor_," he breathed, "and detention is extended to the entirety of next week. Your mother will be hearing about this."

"I'm sure she'd love to know," said Sirius boldly, inwardly dreading what would surely be a Howler tomorrow.

Professor Tanarm looked at Sirius murderously. Scarily. Terrifyingly.

Remus, who had just gotten his breath back in relief, felt, accompanied by gratefulness, relief, gratefulness, more relief, and a deep happiness that he had fallen down on the stairs that fateful day, admiration. If that glance had been directed at him, he'd have been running as fast as possible in the opposite direction.

For what seemed like hours but what was really only two or three minutes, Sirius and Tanarm stared at each other, both refusing to to break eye contact first. In the end, Tanarm did.

"We'll see about this tonight, in detention, as well as we will for the next_ three _weeks," said Tanarm silkily. "Now, let's begin class. As you all know, He Who Must Not Be Named is arising.."

–

"Tanarm is a freak," declared James as they walked out of earshot of him. "He was literally talking like he _liked _this Voldemort dude he was harping on about.."

"Maybe he's a Death Eater," suggested Remus wearily.

"He's definitely evil enough to be one," grumbled Sirius. "What _was _he on about, Remus, at the beginning of class? And what does 'grievous' mean?"

"Hurry up, we have to get to Transfiguration," said Remus loudly. "McGonagall's gonna kill us if we're tardy."

Sirius blinked. "That's what 'grievous' means?"

"_No!"_

The bell rang suddenly and the hallway cleared completely.

"Now we're _late," _groaned Remus. "And we still have to go halfway around the school..!"

"What does grievousmean?" pestered Sirius, not moving. "Tell me tell me tell me tell me. Why did he keep saying that you're sick? How come? _Are _you sick? And – "

"SIRIUS, COME ON!"

"WHAT DOES GRIEVOUS MEAN?"

Remus spun around to face his friends. To everyone's shock, his eyes were swimming with tears.

"It means I'm a werewolf," he whispered furiously. "A werewolf. That's what it means. It means I've lied to you for an entire year, but I'm tired of it, and that I'm a monster. A werewolf, Sirius. That's what grievously ill means."

And he ran off down the hall, leaving his friends absolutely, completely, totally shocked.


	24. Aftermath

Chapter Twenty Four

Aftermath

Remus ran down the hall faster than he could, breath coming in jerky stops, eyes swimming with tears.

_What have I done?_

For a year that had lasted about ten seconds, he had been the luckiest boy in the world. He had friends who didn't know about his secret, they weren't any close to finding out – and he had gone and given it away..he'd told them..he'd told them..

He stopped and fell against a wall. Despite his valiant efforts, he could not stop tears falling out of his eyes and soaking his cheeks.

_What have I done?  
_

For a year that lasted less than ten seconds, his ridiculous life had been perfect for the first time since he was six years old. He had people – people who weren't his parents, because they didn't count, they were his _parents, _people his own age – who liked him, who didn't scream and run as soon as he saw them coming, who didn't, if they weren't screaming and running, asking him stupid, mocking questions. And now he'd gone and ruined the perfection..he'd ruined it..he'd ruined it..

He was crying now, despite his valiant efforts to stop, collect himself, and get to Transfiguration.

_What have I done?_

For a year that was gone in a snap, he had been happy.

And now it was gone. Now it was over.

_WHAT – HAVE – I – DONE?_

_ I killed my life, that's what I did_, decided Remus. _My life is over forever now._

_I should just start packing my bags._

_No. I'll have one more Transfiguration class. If I run I can make it, just ten minutes late, and if I explain later.._

_ Yes. One last Transfiguration class._

_ And maybe I'll finish the day._

_ And then I'll pack._

How Remus got through the rest of the day, he'd never know. He sat all the way at the back of the room in every lesson, head lowered, not once raising his hand. At the end of Transfiguration, he ended up spilling out a rambly lie about falling over a suit of armor and breaking his leg. He knew McGonagall saw right through this, but she detained from taking points anyways. He did not meet anyone's eyes. He kept his eyes to the ground and refused to call back "Hi!" if someone called "Hi!" to him. He spent lunch and dinner at the library.

Finally, the long day was over, and he strode up to Dumbledore's office. He knew where it was, as he had been taken there before school began for the situation of how he would transform be explained.

He stood for a few moments after he'd gone up the moving staircase, in front of the two gargoyles, with not the slightest idea of the password.

"Er.." He knew from experience that Dumbledore's passwords were always candy. "C..oachroach cluster?"

The gargoyle remained unmoving.

"Acid pops?"

Nothing.

"Lemon drop?"

Nothing.

"Oh come on, _please _let me in.."

Nothing. In sheer frustration, Remus kicked the gargoyle. "Drooble's Bubble Gum!" he cried desperately. "Blood pops!"

The gargoyle moved aside.

"Blood pops?" said Remus in amazement. "I was only joking.."

He walked into the room and knocked tentatively.

"Enter," came a light tone.

Remus entered, slightly nervous. Except for slightly was a lie. He was _completely, utterly, totally, without a doubt, _terrified.

"Hello, Mr. Lupin," said Dumbledore, looking at him over his long, slender fingers. He looked a small bit surprised, but not too much. "What brings you here?"

"Er – hello, Professor Dumbledore," said Remus, suddenly feeling more than a little bit awkward. "Ah, I..I have something to..to talk to you about."

"Do sit down," said Dumbledore genially. He picked up his long, slender wand and conjured a chair. Remus sat down, took a deep breath, and said the words he'd been dreading.

"I think I have to leave Hogwarts," he said softly.

Dumbledore took the news quite easily. "I suppose someone has found out about your..problem."

"Yes," said Remus, voice now so quiet he could barely hear himself. Dumbledore apparently had no trouble.

"Well, I won't ask why or how, but I will ask you – who?"

"My friends," said Remus quietly. "James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew."

Dumbledore considered the small, meek boy in front of him. "Well, now, I believe you trust these boys, Remus?"

"Yes, Professor Dumbledore."

"Do you think they would give away your secret?"

"I don't know, Professor Dumbledore."

"Do you think they will betray you now?"

"I do, Professor Dumbledore," said Remus, struggling to keep his voice steady. "Anyone would."

"Well, I will tell you this," said Dumbledore, standing up. "It is up to you whether or not you want to leave Hogwarts, and I can write to your parents if you wish. However, give it a day or so. Speak to your friends. My door is open if you want to come back."

"All right, sir," said Remus quietly. And he left the room.

He didn't exactly obey Dumbledore. Instead, he went to the deserted dormitory, locked the door, and sat on his bed, stroking Romulus.

And cried.

–

**A/N: Hey guys. I realize that this chapter is not all that good. Hope it isn't **_**too **_**OOC.**

** Is it sad that I literally cried while writing this? And I know what's happening next, too.**

** Oh, and while you're here, would you mind reading my story, ****Rain?**** It's desperately short and drabble-like, and I'm actually kind of proud of it. Thanks.**

**Oh yes, one more thing: Go read WeasleyWannabee's _amazing _story, Resolution. Siriusly. Read it. Now.  
**


	25. Secrets

Chapter Twenty Five

Secrets

Sirius, James and Peter watched, mouths practically on the ground, as their friend – _the werewolf – _took off down the hall.

"Remus is a werewolf," James finally managed to say. "Well, learn something new every day."

Peter, meanwhile, had gone stone white. "He's a werewolf," he gasped. "He's a monsterous, wild, creature that could tear us up as we sleep. He's a WEREWOLF!"

"Shut up," said James and Sirius at once.

Peter looked wounded. "But he's a _werewolf,_" he moaned. "I'm _terrified _of werewolves! They _eat _people! He's gonna eat us!_"_

"Shut _up,_" said James and Sirius, again, at the same time.

"But – "

"SHUT UP!" yelled James and Sirius once more. They began speaking at once, furious babbles of just-not nonsense flowing out of their mouths.

"He didn't even tell us – "

"I told him I didn't even mind werewolves – "

"We're supposed to be his friends – "

"Why – "

"How – "

"He _can't – "_

_ "_I don't care – "

"Me neither – "

"So we're – ?"

" – Agreed!"

"We have to – "

"Talk –

"To Remus and ask him – "

"Why in the world he didn't – "

"TELL US!"

They said the last two words at the same time.

Peter stared at his friends. "You two do what you like," he said in a shaky voice. "I'm not spending one more day in that dormitory with that _werewolf._"

And he sped off down the hall in the other direction.

James and Sirius looked at each other.

"What – a – " Sirius began, his eyes narrowing.

"We'll get him later," said Jame impatiently. "Come on, come on, we have to go find Remus!"

* * *

Life lesson: Finding your friend after he reveals to you that he is a werewolf is not as easy as it looks.

Remus hurried into Transfiguration ten minutes late, and despite their frantic gestures, he sat far away from his friends, all the way at the back of the classroom. He did this in every class they had, and didn't show up at all to lunch or dinner. Peter seemed to have disappeared all together.

"Is he avoiding us?" asked Sirius suspiciously that night as the two sat down in front of the common room fire. Remus still wasn't around and Peter hadn't reappeared.

"I don't know, Sirius, just _maybe,_" said James sarcastically.

"But.._why?"_

"Sirius..sometimes I know why you and Remus argue so much."

Sirius blinked. "I don't."

"Because YOU'RE SO INCREDIBLY DUMB!"

Sirius looked wounded. "Dumb? Me?"

James let out a long, exaggerated sigh. "This can_not _go on any longer," he declared. "I am not _made _to argue with you. That's Remus's job!"

"But I seriously don't understand – "

"BECAUSE_,_" James shouted, "_he just told us that he's a – "_

He stopped short. He was attracting stares. "Nothing to see here!" he yelled. "Move along, people, go away!"

He leaned in closer to his friends as the mystified rest of the common room returned confusedly to their going ons. "_A werewolf,_" he said, in tones so soft he could barely hear himself.

Sirius frowned. "Oh. Kay. Then. Sure."

"Sirius, this is _serious!" _

It was a mark of how serious the situation (seriously) truly (seriously) was that Sirius actually took it seriously and didn't quip about his name. "Yeah," he admitted. "We should really go see him, shouldn't we? And a) demand why he didn't tell us and 2) tell him we don't give a hoot about whether he's a werewolf or a green alien with purple polka dots all over his nose or... a moose."

James considered this. "I've always wanted to make friends with a moose," he agreed.

"Wait," said Sirius. "What about Peter?"

James sighed. "I really, really don't know, Sirius. It's gonna kill Remus that one of his best friends is gonna be so horrible to him for this of all stupid trivial things in the word. Let's just not bring him up..and if he asks..well.." His hand drifted to his messy hair and he attempted practically unconsciously to flatten it. This was apparently a gesture he'd made habit over the summer, as this was practically the eight thousandth time he'd performed it today. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," he finally declared.

"Yes," agreed Sirius. "But what will we _say?"_

James's hand wafted to his hair again.

"We should really plan ahead.." Sirius began, then he slapped himself angrily across the face. "_I sound like Remus! _Ugh!"

"Well, I don't think – wait, look, speak of..the werewolf, I guess," said James suddenly, pointing to the doorway. Indeed, Remus was walking in.

James drew a breath. "REEEEMUS! OVERRR HEEEERRRREEEE!" he shouted as loudly as possible.

But Remus didn't even look their way. He only drew his cloak over his face and walked quickly towards their dormitory. He paused briefly to pick up his cat, then resumed walking.

James and Sirius looked at each other.

"Yeah, we definitely needa plan ahead."

* * *

Finally, after three hours of scribbling down scripts and practicing and memorizing and glaring at each other and yelling at each other and throwing pieces of parchment at each other..they finally were ready to confront Remus Lupin.

"He's locked the door," groaned James. "Oh, wow, he's _locked the door. _He's not making this easy for us, is he.."

But Sirius only whipped out his wand. "Actually, he is," he said smugly. "Gosh, for someone so smart, Rem sure can be dumb..maybe we should ask him to open it first, though, before _Alahomora-_ing it."

"Agreed," agreed James. He banged on the door. "OI! REMUS! OPEN UP!"

There was nothing but silence. Sirius took a turn.

"_Remus Lupin!_" yelled Sirius. "_Open the door so we can talk to you!_"

"No," came a call from inside. "I'm never coming out."

James pressed his hand to his head. "What about Transfiguration class?" he tempted his friend.

"I'm never coming out except to leave Hogwarts forever," came a yell.

Sirius drummed his fingers against the wall. "Well, that's cheerful," he said dryly.

"REMUS!" shouted James. "OPEN UP OR ELSE I'M BLASTING THE DOOR OPEN IN THREE SECONDS!"

"GO AWAY!" came a desperate yell.

"THREE!"

"Please, you guys, just _leave!"_

"TWO ONE ZERO! STAND BACK – _ALOHOMORA!"_

The door flew open, revealing Remus standing straight up on the bed, his cat looking understandably miffed, as he'd obviously been thrown from it seconds ago.

"Mreow," said Romulus in a very dignified sort of cat way, before stalking out of the room.

"Hello, Remus," said James. "Long time no talk."

"Please," Remus pleaded, "just leave."

"_Why, _Remus?" demanded Sirius, cutting straight to the point. "_Why _wouldn't you tell us such a ginormous secret of yours?"

"Just _go," _begged Remus.

"Did you think we were complete morons and would never figure it out?" James challenged.

"Leave me _alone._"

"REMUS, GIVE US ANSWERS!" shouted Sirius, throwing his arms in the air. "For _crying out loud! _We don't _care _if you're a werewolf! It's not like you'll morph into a wolf while we sleep, is it? You go somewhere – _safe _to transform – er – right?"

"Of course I do," whispered Remus.

"GOOD!" Sirius shouted. He wasn't actually sure exactly why he was shouting. Something in Remus's scared, quiet tone had hit a nerve. How could his friend not _trust _him? "SO WHY WOULD WE GIVE A FLYING HIPPOGRIFF THAT YOU'RE A – " he lowered his voice "_werewolf?" _

At the word _werewolf, _Remus flinched violently and sank down a little bit, tears threatening his eyes. "Because," whispered Remus, "because...you wouldn't understand..it's long..and..and.."

"We've got all night," said James, sitting down and crossing his legs. "There's no homework. Go on. We're all ears."

"Hang on a_ second,_" said Sirius aggressively, and Remus shrank back slightly. "Before he starts explaining – _which he will do, a lot of – _I have some questions I want answers to_ – _"

"_Sirius,_" said James sharply. "Let Remus talk."

Sirius glared at James for a few seconds, then sent a look of anger at Remus, and finally flumped onto his bed. "All right. Talk. But I want a _detailed explanation."_

Remus shot James a grateful look before beginning, in an extremely shaky voice, "It all started when..when..when I was six years old." Remus clenched his hands to stop them shaking. "My dad..my dad insulted him..my dad was trying to pass a law.." He felt his eyes burning with tears, "to outlaw werewolves. Fenrir Greyback heard about it. Fenrir Greyback..he's..I could go on for hours about how vile he is but I won't." Remus closed his eyes and fought back the memories of that horrible day that he'd gone..he'd gone into the forest..exploring..

"Remus," said Sirius sharply.

"I'm sorry, but this is kind of hard for me, okay!" said Remus angrily.

His friends silenced, and suddenly Remus found himself wishing they would talk. The silence was too much, too harsh, too.. silent.

Remus closed his eyes briefly, then opened then again. He found he couldn't quite meet his friends' eyes, so he opted for looking at the wall. "I was six years old," he repeated. "I went into the forest because Ricky Miller from primary school told me that there were faeries in the forest. My dad told me that faeries didn't live in England, at least not this part, and that mostly they stayed to themselves anyway. Mum just rolled her eyes and said she'd always thought faeries didn't exist but there you go. But I didn't listen to anyone. Ricky Miller was pure blood so I thought he knew more than my dad, who is a Muggle born by the way. And so I went into the forest. It was dark. And..then..he lunged." Remus couldn't suppress a shudder.

"Remus," said Sirius again, but in a much softer tone. "You don't have to – "

But Remus was already in too far to stop. "He grabbed me. I was six years old, I had no idea what to do. So I screamed. I screamed and screamed. And then he bit me. Right there.." He pulled up the hem of his robes very slightly, and for the first time, James and Sirius saw, on his ankle, a small, perfectly round scar.

"The cause of all my problems, this scar," said Remus darkly. "I screamed and screamed and screamed, and the wolf loped away. And then my dad found me, and he scolded me for going into the forest for no reason, and I told him a wolf bit me. And to this day I haven't forgotten the look on his face..it was completely white. I didn't know it then, but now I do – he knew,. He took me home and we went to St. Mungo's." Remus took a breath. "I was about ten seconds from dying that night," he whispered. "They all told me it was a miracle that I was alive. They just barely saved me. After that, everything changed. I was taken out of school and I just had to keep to myself. But my best friend...the one who told me about the faeries..Ricky Miller..I told him, I told him if he'd swear not to tell anyone, and he did. But as soon as I told him..he screamed and he ran away and he told me that he never wanted to see me again because I might eat him. He told everyone magic in our village – there were a lot of them, see. And he told all the Muggles that I had a dangerous disease. And everyone..I mean no one..would come anywhere near me after that." Remus noted inanely that his hands were shaking wildly. He heard the horrible cries of the children as he came near. _Ahhhhh! Get him away! He's gonna eat us!_ "And I thought that you guys might..would possibly..would probably..do what everyone would do. Abandon me. Tell everyone." Remus forced his hands into fists to stop them shaking. "And you probably will.."

"Remus," said James quietly. "I have six words for you.

"You.

"Are.

"The.

"Biggest.

"Idiot.

"Alive."

Remus looked very taken aback. "Er.."

"Yeah, you are," jumped in Sirius. "How could you think that we would betray you for something as – as – as you would say, as _trivial _as you being a werewolf? It doesn't _matter. _It's just once a month, isn't it? As Andromeda would say, it's just that you happen to turn into a bloodthirsty beast twelve out of three hundred sixty five days."

Remus flinched as if slapped.

"I'm sorry," said Sirius quickly. "I mean..turn into a wolf. I like wolves."

"Yeah, at least you're not a moose," agreed James.

"..A_ moose?" _repeated Remus.

And the three began to laugh.

And suddenly Remus knew. He knew that he was being an idiot. His friends would never do anything to hurt him, they would never desert him, especially not for this, and they would never tell anyone his secret.

"And you know, Remus," added Sirius, "I'm not mad at you for not telling us, not really. I mean I wish you _had, _but..well..I kind of see where you're coming from in not telling us after you told us that story..and..you should hear my parents harping on about werewolves. So you were entirely justified, as you would say."

"Yeah," said James, rather uncharacteristically serious. "I mean..everyone has secrets. Right?"

"Yeah," agreed Sirius.

"I'm afraid of teddy bears," offered James.

There was a beat.

"..Teddy bears?" repeated Sirius.

"Yeeeeeah, shouldn't have shared that," muttered James, reddening.

"You're crazier than you look," Sirius told him.

"So are you," said James cheerfully.

"I am not!"

"You are too! You're much crazier than me!"

"At least I don't fear teddy bears!"

"At least it wasn't my idea to GRAFFITI THE POTIONS ROOM!"

"You helped!"

"Only because you made me!"

"Well, whose idea was the sheep?"

"Yours!"

"Was not!"

"Was too!"

"It was Peter's!"

"He was at home!"

"Hey you guys..where _is_ Peter?" asked Remus, suddenly noticing his absence and wondering briefly how he'd missed him.

Both friends stopped bickering and immediately feel silent. "Yyyyyeah, about that," said Sirius uneasily.

"Yes, about that," said Remus, a slow but painfully familiar feeling of dread rising in his chest. "Where.. what.."

"Remus, we'll get around him eventually," said James desperately. "It doesn't – "

"You guys," said Remus quietly, "what did he say when I told you guys – what I told you?"

James and Sirius looked at each other nervously.

"What did he say?" repeated Remus, his voice stronger. "_What did he say?_"

"You're really scary sometimes," said Sirius in a small voice. "Do you know that?"

"Sirius, please tell me."

"Weeeelll.." began James, as Sirius didn't particularly look anywhere near telling anyone anything, "he_ may _have mentioned something along the lines of..you know.." He cleared his throat nervously. "Um..Remus..you _really _don't wanna hear this.."

"Tell me," said Remus once more, but his voice trembled.

James swallowed. Sirius took over. "Right," he said nervously, "he might've said something along the lines of.. monsterous, wild, creature that could tear us up as we sleep.."

Remus sucked in his breath. He went first a light shade of red, the a deep, deep purple, and finally he went white as a sheet of paper. "You have to be kidding me," he whispered.

"I told you you didn't wanna hear it," said Sirius meekly.

"Remus..we'll make him see sense," began James.

"Yeah, it'll be fine," Sirius said anxiously.

"I'm going to sleep," was all Remus said. "Thanks, you guys. Really. I don't deserve the friends I have..at least, not you two."

And before they could reply, he'd climbed into bed.

Sirius looked at James.

"Not your average first day back," he mouthed.


	26. The Dilemma of Peter Pettigrew

Chapter Twenty Six

The Dilemma of Peter Pettigrew

_Run run run run – _

_ "I'm a werewolf."_

_ run run run run –_

_ "I'm a werewolf."_

_ RUN RUN RUN RUN –_

_ "I'm a werewolf."_

Finally, Peter stopped, slamming against a wall, breathing hard.

For a few moments, he just felt hollow. Then feelings erupted along each other insanely quickly. _Grief, worry, hatred, fear..._

After a few moments, fear overtook it all. "I share a dorm with a werewolf," he muttered. Ever since a small age, for a rather unexplainable reason, he had been absolutely, completely, utterly _terrified _of werewolves.

Which, as he now learned he shared a dormitory with one, was a real dilemma.

After a few moments, he decided what he was going to do. After class today, he was going straight to Dumbledore and asking to be change his dormitory. He simply could not live with a werewolf in his bedroom. And that was that.

Cheered by his decision, he also decided to spend the day inconspicuously. Peter was very good at simply blending in to the rest of the crowd, because he had such an ordinary look about him. As long as he kept his head low and his cloak drawn tight, he was perfectly fine.

So he pulled his cloak low, drew his head towards his body, and set off towards Transfiguration.

…

_Being inconspicuous is easier than you'd think, _reflected Peter that evening as he sat hidden behind a book in the library. The only person who had looked twice at him that day was the librarian, with her usual scary glare she gave to every student who walked into the library.

_How does Remus stand her? _thought Peter unintentionally. He shuddered. Remus wasn't Remus. He was a werewolf.

Peter glanced at his watch. It was ten to nine. Time to visit Dumbledore.

The only problem was, he didn't have the faintest idea where his office was. For half an hour, he wondered through the vast halls of Hogwarts, passing every corridor seven or eight times.

_I need to talk to Dumbledore, _he thought desperately, pacing in front of a blank wall, trying to work out his dilemma.

_I need to talk to Dumbledore.._

_ I _NEED _to talk to Dumbledore.._

He let our a cry of shock suddenly. The blank wall had disappeared, replaced by an inviting door.

Peter wasn't really sure what provoked him to do it, if it was instinct, or plain stupidity, or maybe just curiosity. But he pushed open the door and peeked nervously inside. He gasped when he saw what he did.

"P-professor Dumbledore? What are you doing here?"

"Hello, Mr. Pettigrew," said Dumbledore amiably, looking over his spectacles at the terrified boy. "I was simply taking a stroll around Hogwarts. Fancy that you should show up.."

Peter gulped. "W-w-w-well.." he stammered. "I-I-I..I ac-ac-actu-actual-actually need to, um, tell you something...if it's n-no-no-not any t-t-trouble, I mean – I don't want to, um, h-hold y-you up, P-P-Prof-Profess-Professor.."

"Fire away, Peter," said Dumbledore merrily.

Peter gulped again, and tried to muster up the courage to say what he needed to.

"You know," said Dumbledore conversationally, as if he routinely spoke to scrawny second-years, "you're the second second-year come to see me today. Fancy that."

"O-oh really? W-well, Professor..I was just..it was just.."

"Yes?" said Dumbledore, looking mildly interestedly at Peter.

"I-think-I-need-to-change-dorms," said Peter in a rush. He felt himself go purple.

Dumbledore appeared to have understood every word he said. "Change dorms?" he repeated, regarding Peter interestedly. "And why is that?"

Peter felt rather unsure of how to tell the professor. "Well sir – I'm not sure if you know – but Remus Lupin – he's a werewolf!"

Peter certainly did not receive the reaction he expected. "Yes, I know," said Dumbledore calmly. "And – not that I don't hold your feelings in highest regards, Mr. Pettigrew, for I do, I do – but I'm afraid we cannot arrange to have your dormitory switched."

Before Peter could open his mouth, Professor Dumbledore held up a hand. "I think, Mr. Pettigrew," he added quietly, "that you should certainly give your friend a chance. Allow him to explain himself. I do not think you should abandon a close comrade for such a small reason. Do you?"

And quite suddenly, Dumbledore vanished, leaving Peter alone and very, very confused.

…

"Welcome to lesson number two of Defense Against the Dark Arts," said Professor Tanarm in his usual frosty tone of voice. "I am – lucky – enough, as it turns out, to have this class two days in a row – Mondays and Tuesdays."

Peter was sitting at the very back of the classroom. He had a clear view of everything. He saw that Remus, James, and Sirius were sitting next to each other.

_Guess they made up, _he thought restlessly. Nonetheless, Remus's head was bowed slightly, as if he was deeply depressed about something. James and Sirius both looked as if they were in a torture chamber. Peter still wasn't at all ready to go anywhere_ near _Remus – the werewolf. He hadn't told anyone else, partially because he could barely bring himself to say it, and partially because...was it possible, he wondered? But a small part of Peter still seemed to care about Remus, and that part knew that Remus would not want this secret of his to be told.

"Today," said Professor Tanarm, jerking Peter up from his reflections, "we are going to learn about one of the foulest beasts that dare to have the nerve to walk on our clean earth. They pollute the air simply by being alive, and I know I am not alone in wishing death upon the entire inhuman species. Can someone please tell me what this creature is?"

Several hands drifted into the air. Peter had no idea.

"Yes, Mr. Lupin?" said Tanarm, lip curling slightly.

"The dementor, sir?" said Remus.

Peter could swear Tanarm smirked. "I am afraid not," he said. "Can you try again, Mr. Lupin? Think, now..what do youthink I think?"

Remus looked completely bewildered for a moment – then, very suddenly, he went completely white. He faced his desk and whispered something unheard by anyone.

"Can you say that louder?" Tanarm's smirk was more defined.

"The werewolf, sir," whispered Remus, and despite himself, Peter felt a hot surge of hate go through him. How _could _this man do _this, _and _knowingly? _He definitely knew Remus was a werewolf...he had to...

"What about the werewolf?" said Tanarm in a voice that implied he was deeply enjoying himself. Sirius and James were both glaring at the professor, looking enraged, and Remus looked about two seconds away from tears. He gulped slightly before speaking, in a voice just barely hearable.

"Werewolves..are..the..foulest..creatures..to walk..this..earth," he whispered.

"Can't you just _leave _him _alone?" _said Sirius loudly.

There was a gasp. Sirius might as well've gotten onto hands and knees and begged Tanarm to murder him. Remus had gone whiter still, and he was mouthing frantically to Sirius.

"And what exactly do you mean by that, Mr.._Black?" _said Tanarm softly, with the same slightly sarcastic lilt onBlack.

"I mean – I mean – " Sirius stammered, but it was clear to Peter he had hit a dead stop. He couldn't exactly tell the whole immensely confused class that Remus had just called himself the foulest creature alive.

"I _meant,_" Sirius finally said, "that – I mean I wasn't really talking about Remus – I was talking about – werewolves in general. And I disagree – about – werewolves in general."

Peter saw Remus give a tiny moan and bury his face in his hands.

"Not that Remus is, you know, a werewolf – that's just completely stupid, ha ha ha, isn't that just the most insane idea I've ever had, James?" said Sirius desperately.

"Yeah, that's completely idiotic," agreed James, cottoning on. "You've had a lot of stupid ideas, but nothing bad as this.."

"_Enough,_" said Tanarm, even though by the looks of his face, he had been enjoying the exchange. "Mr.._Black, _why do you disagree with me?"

"Because," said Sirius loudly, "werewolves are only beasts twelve out of three hundred and sixty five days. The other three hundred and fifty three days, they are completely normal, probably nice, human beings. It is entirely out of their control to change into a wolf."

"And yet once these werewolves do become werewolves," breathed Tanarm, "they resign themselves to a life of destroying everyone, whether they're bitten or not."

"You're wrong!" argued Sirius.

"I believe, Mr._ Black,_" said Tanarm scarily, "that I, not you, am the teacher in this classroom. Fifty points from.._Gryffindor, _and detention is extended to two weeks. Now that we are done with that, on to werewolves. Copy this down.."

The rest of the class was sent into complete silence. Peter couldn't stop playing and replaying Tanarm's words in his head, again and again and again.._the foulest beast who ever lived.._how could people be so horrible? It wasn't like it was Remus's choice to transform..

_Look who's talking, _said a nasty, truthful voice in his mind.

Peter's head was aching and spinning. He didn't want to be racist, he wanted to be friends with Remus – and yet, he was terrified. Absolutely completely utterly downright terrified of him.

He decided there was only one thing to do.

And that was to go and visit Hagrid.

…...

**A.N: Dun dun dun! So, next couple chapters will be fairly serious, and then we will plunge briefly into total, utter, **_**complete **_**randomly insanity. All very Marauderly, of course. And that'll be topped by sad, sad, sadness that involves Voldemort, Sirius, two Ocs and Andromeda. The horror the horror! **

** By the way, is it absolutely horrible that I enjoy writing Tanarm? (Pronounced, btw, tan arm.) :P I mean, I HATE him, and I like yelling at the screen as much as the next person, but I must say, he's fun.**

** Well, JKR likes writing Snape. What can we do?**

**But God, I hate Peter.  
**


	27. Hagrid

Chapter Twenty Seven  
Hagrid

Despite Hagrid just becoming gamekeeper, the Marauders knew quite a lot of him. Og was a friendly old man who often invited innocent first years for tea and fed them cakes that broke their jaws and let them stroke nifflers (which had, by the end of the year, caused a few problems.) Hagrid shared his house, and he was usually the one making the tea, and he often talked cheerfully with the said invited first years. Therefore, Peter knew Hagrid was kind and friendly and very good for advice. He was hardly scared of him at all anymore.

The day seemed endless. He had every single stupid class with his friends, and it was getting harder and harder to look inconspicuous, especially as his friends were now looking for him, and had taken to asking people where he was. He had to dodge them more times than often, and there was one rather uncomfortable encounter with a talkative suit of armor who gave him a long interrogation regarding, amongst other things, the armor's love life and pansies. All in all, he was very happy when McGonagall assigned them one last piece of homework and they were free to go.

"Drat," muttered Peter. As he was leaving, his three friends had caught sight of him and were hurrying towards him. He began to run as fast as he possibly could – but it was no use – there was a spell, a spell, what was it, Sirius had taught it to them in first year –

"_Invisicoursos tpoal Remus Sirius JAMES!_" he muttered, remembering at last. He stopped running and stood very still. His friends imitated him.

"Darn," said James, sounding disappointed. "We lost him." Peter felt a sweep of relief.

"_Why _does he keep running _away _from us?" said Sirius frustratedly. Peter stood very still.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Remus," said James hesitantly, "but..er..Sirius, he's sorta running away from Remus more than us."

"I _know,_" snapped Sirius. "But _why? _Doesn't he have _any _common sense in his brain? It's not a full moon – "

"Keep your voice down," implored Remus.

Peter could not take much more of this. He allowed a furtive glance over his shoulder, then stole away, through the corridors, and out of the school. It was relief to get onto the fresh air of the grounds. He set off towards Hagrid's.

When he reached his hut, he stood for a moment, slightly intimidated. This was the first time, really, he'd done.._anything _without being accompanied by his friends.

_It's just Hagrid, _he told himself before knocking hard on the door. There was a loud barking from inside.

"_Down, _Fang, _down! _Jus' a mo' – hullo, Peter. Come in, I'll make some tea – where's yeh friends?" Hagrid ushered Peter into his home, where Fang promptly slobbered all over him.

"D'ya want sugar?" called Hagrid as Peter sat down at the table.

"Two teaspoons, please," said Peter meekly.

"Where're yeh friends?" asked Hagrid, setting a teapot, two mugs, a saucer of milk, and a sugar bowl on the table. "Those crazies – whatter their names, James an' Sirius an' the calm one – Remus?"

Peter burst into tears.

"Ahhh, Peter, now, don' cry," said Hagrid, sitting down next to the weeping boy and gently patting him on the shoulder. "Did yeh lot have a fight, then?"

"You could say that," muttered Peter, who had stopped crying almost immediately, and was hating himself quite a bit. "Hagrid..I don't know if you know..but..but Remus..he's.."

"A werewolf," acknowledged Hagrid quietly.

"Yeah," said Peter, wiping his eyes. "How'd'y'know?"

"All the staff do," said Hagrid, waving a hand carelessly. "Go on."

Peter took a breath as the last of his tears dried, and then he launched into an explanation of how, for some unexplainable reason, he had always been afraid of werewolves, and how consequently he was now afraid of werewolves, and how horribly their Defense teacher had acted, how he didn't want to be a biased racist or a racist bias, if that even makes any sense I mean, and how he wanted to be Remus's friend but was too afraid, and if he lost Remus as a friend then he would lose _all _his friends, and if he kept Remus as a friend he might get eaten as he slept, and how he still hadn't finished his Defense Against the Dark Arts essay..

The last bit came out with a trace of hysteria in his voice. He thumped his head on Hagrid's table and said in a muffled voice, "What am I gonna _do?"_

Hagrid was regarding the boy with uncharacteristic seriousness. "Peter," he said gently, "if I tol' yeh I was half giant, what would yeh do? Would yeh stop confidin' in me? Would yeh run away? No, of course yeh wouldn't," Hagrid answered for him as Peter looked up in slow astonishment. "Because I'm still yeh're Hagrid.

"Now, I ain't tellin' yeh to make up with Remus, because that's, that's yehr own choice. But.._I'm a half giant, _Peter, and don't tell anyone. But I'm still yehr Hagrid." hagrid gently patted Peter on the head, sending him deeper into the table. "Keep that in my mind," he said quietly. "I'm still yehr Hagrid. I'm a half giant, yes, but I'm still yehr Hagrid.

"Head on back, now. Yeh'll be missed."

* * *

_I'm still yehr Hagrid._

_ I'm still yehr Hagrid._

_ I'm still yehr Hagrid._

_ Hagrid would never in a million years hurt me, or anyone, unless they insulted Dumbledore, or really provoked him like mad._

_ Even if he is a giant._

_ He's still my Hagrid._

_ And Remus.._Peter stopped and leaned against a tree, massaging his head. It was aching. _Remus is still Remus._

_ Would Remus ever hurt me?_

_ Ever?_

_ No. Remus would never hurt me._

_ Ever._

And for the first time, Peter Pettigrew knew exactly what he had to do.

* * *

Remus Lupin knew exactly what he had to do.

He had to leave Hogwarts.

Certainly, his friends didn't hate him, at least not most of them. But Peter did. And Peter would probably tell everyone. And in no circumstances could this secret get out. It would be too dangerous.

He folded his green sweater and placed it carefully in the trunk.

"Remus, I need to – _what are you doing?"_

Peter had arrived.

"Hello," said Remus, standing up. "I was preparing to leave Hogwarts."

Peter's jaw dropped. "_What? Why?_"

"Let's think now," said Remus. Despite the fact that he entirely blamed himself, he couldn't help feeling a tiny bit angry at Peter. "Maybe because my biggest secret just got out and you will probably tell all of Hogwarts, who will consequently run away, really really really fast, and who knows, for all _I _know I might_ tear you up as I sleep._"

"Remus," said Peter, "Remus, I'm really sorry about that – "

"Save it, Pettigrew," spat Remus. "You're like the rest of them."

"The rest of..?"

"You're a bigot. You think _all _werewolves are bloodthirsty monsters of the night, don't you? Even me, your _best friend.."_

"Remus – "

"It doesn't matter that I've stuck with you through thin and thick, through floods and fires, it doesn't matter, because now, now that I'm a _werewolf – _"

"Remus – "

"You're acting as if it's my _choice, _Pettigrew, and it's not, you don't understand, you don't understand anything, you think I _enjoy _becoming a bloodthirsty monster? Do you?"

"No – "

"I would never've guessed!"

"Would you just LISTEN to me?" shouted Peter.

Remus glared. "Why should I listen to you if you don't listen to reason?" he said in a low voice.

"Because I'm really, really sorry, okay? Because I just went down and talked to Hagrid and he reminded me about how stupid I'm being and how you're still Remus and you haven't hurt me or anyone else and just because I know that you _could _now doesn't mean you ever, ever would, not in a million trillion gazazillion years, at least if you could help it, and I _know _that now, all right? _That's _why you should listen to me! Because I'm sorry! I was an idiot! I was a bigot and a racist and whatever else you want to call me, BUT I'M _SORRY! _Acting like I did for the past two days was the biggest mistake of my life, and I've made some big ones. You – and James and Sirius – are the best friends I've ever made. And now I realize that what I've done could lose you. I realize, I completely realize without even the slightest shiver of doubt that I was a complete jerk. Look, I'm not asking you to become friends with me again, or to even accept my apology. I just want you to listen to what I'm saying. So please do."

Remus was observing his friend, quiet smiles growing in his eyes. "I don't think I need to anymore," he said softly, and without further ado the two friends were that once more – friends.

"I'm sorry," said Peter again. "I'm really, really sorry."

"Accepted," said Remus evenly, even though he wanted to jump up and scream and laugh inside.

He didn't have to leave Hogwarts.

He had his friends back.

Not, he reflected, that they ever really left.

* * *

**A/N: Aawww. See? It's all good! They're all friend again! Yay!**

**Voldy makes a show in the next chapter.. -cue dramatic music.- It'll hopefully be up soon. I'm going away for a bit later, so you'll get a big chunk of chapters pretty soon, unless school decides to hate me and pile even MORE work on me than I'm already currently dealing with. Ta, my friends! Until next time!  
**


	28. Danger On the Rise

Chapter Twenty Eight

Danger

"So in short, Petey was an idiot and Remus forgave him?" summed up Sirius the next day at breakfast. Peter winced slightly as the word usage, but nodded.

"No," said Remus loyally, "Peter was just rationally scared, and I blew myself way out of proportion by yelling at him."

"You didn't really _yell _at me," pointed out Peter. "You just kinda lost your temper for a bit, and rightfully so. I was a git."

"You were," agreed James.

"But he apologized like mad," cut in Remus, "and I think we should let the matter drop, if it means so little to you."

"It does!" chorused James and Sirius.

"Lovely," said Remus quite briskly, but traitorous smiles were growing in his eyes.

There was the sound of a thousand flapping post owls. Sirius groaned and hid behind the milk jug as a shark beaked scary looking one flew towards him, holding a letter.

"What color is it, can you see from here?" he asked anxiously.

"Red," said Remus after a moment.

"GAH!" shouted Sirius, throwing his arms up in the air. "What's it _for? _What've I done _now?_"

"Mouthed off to Tanarm," said James promptly.

"Oh," said Sirius. "Thanks." He paused. "That doesn't help much, y'know."

"You asked."

"Oh, yeah. Well, it still doesn't help."

"I'll keep that in mind..."

"You know, this isn't shaping up to be the best week back," said Sirius gloomily as the owl drew nearer. "First Remus's – er – problem – then Peter being a git about it, and Tanarm, now this."

"And it's all tied to Tanarm," said Remus darkly. "If he hadn't been dropping all those horrible hints and getting my temper up, then I wouldn't've told you, and Sirius wouldn't've mouthed off and this wouldn't've happened, and we could've had a normal week and normal lives."

"We're wizards," James reminded him. "Marauder wizards. Normal lives are impossible for us."

"Oh, yeah."

"Hold your ears," sighed Sirius as the Howler landed in front of him.

"Hang on a second – " said Remus. "Sirius, _stop!"_

Sirius had made to tear open the Howler. "Wha..?"

"Don't open it – I need to think of something – we're _wizards.._"

"Well, yeah," said Sirius, mystified, but Remus seemed to be talking to himself.

"Muggles have thought of ways to put out fires. Why can't wizards? This is just the same. The fire is acting as a carrier for the sound. The longer it builds up, it compresses, and the sound gets louder. Science. And the fire is carrying the sound. The fire is 80 percent responsible for the sound, it said clearly in _Magical Mysteries. So,_ if the fire went out...THE FIRE IS THE CARRIER FOR THE SOUND! If the fire went out, then _so would the sound! _And the only way to get the fire out..." Remus's friends could see his mind working furiously for about two seconds, then – "_water! _Sirius!" Remus looked urgently at his friend. "Sirius, tear it open _fast _and throw water on it! And that'll muffle the sound _eighty percent! _And a _Silencio _would take care of the rest!"

Sirius looked intrigued and excited. "But why can't we just _silencio _the entire thing?" he questioned.

"_Because, _a Howler is twenty times louder than a normal noise, and a _silencio _would only erase about twenty percent of the sound!" Remus was almost overcome with excitement.

"Remus, remind me never to say anything rude to you about reading again," breathed Sirius. The Howler was smoking at the corners. He tore it open, and before it could get out more than a _**"SIRIUS ORION – **_" A glass of water and a _silencio _took care of it.

"You were saying, Mother?" said Sirius in tones of perfect politeness. He and his friends burst out laughing.

In the excitement, Remus hadn't realized he had an owl too, but it was there, and nipping him.

"_Ow,_" said Remus formidably. "What do you want, and who are you? Oh, I see – here you go." He combed through his pockets and produced five knuts. The owl dropped a newspaper onto his plate, then, looking highly disgruntled, flew off.

"Why are you getting _The Daily Prophet?" _said James digustedly. "Load of rubbish, Mum says."

"Because if Dumbledore is to be believed," said Remus in tones that implied that anyone who didn't believe Dumbledore was an idiot, "then You-Know-Who – "

"Say _Voldemort,_ Remus," said James. Remus shuddered.

"Fear of a name only – " began James, but Remus held up a hand.

"I'll say it later," he said levelly. "Anyhow, You-Know-Who is at large and has been since last year. We have to accept it. He's murdering by the mass, and personally, I want to see who."

"That makes sense," said James after a moment. "Although it doesn't make sense that you don't say Voldemort. It's just a name. It's just a bunch of letters stuck together. I say it. So does Sirius."

"Can you please not say that," said Sirius tensely. His friends looked over at him.

"What's up?" asked James, surprised. "Say what?"

"Don't say that I say Voldemort."

"But you do."

"It doesn't matter. It's _why _I do it. It's.."

"Sirius, what in the world are you on about?" But it was at this moment that Sirius stuffed a piece of toast in his mouth, which, oddly enough, he didn't swallow until the bell rang a half hour later.

In the meanwhile, Remus immersed himself in the paper, and there were only five minutes left for breakfast (Sirius was still chewing determinedly) when he folded it up. His face was considerably paler.

"Anything worth anything?" asked James.

"There were two werewolf attacks," Remus said quietly, tracing imaginary patterns on the table. "Both by the same werewolf."

"Was it Greyback?" said James, uncharacteristically seriously.

Remus swallowed. "Yeah," he said in a could-be offhand voice. "They say he's working for You-Know-Who now.."

"Well, that's not good," observed Peter.

"Think so, Pete?" said James sarcastically.

"Yeah," said Peter, missing the sarcasm. Remus and James rolled their eyes.

Remus was skimming the last page of his paper again. "D'ya guys know if McGonagall has any family?" he asked uneasily.

"I think she has a sister," said James slowly. "Why?"

Remus gulped. The color had gone from his face. "Athena McGonagall was a victim of one of the attacks, and is now residing in St. Mungo's, being treated," he read slowly and quietly. "There is no sign of any injuries other than the lycanthropic carrying bite." Remus drew in a sharp breath. "Athena," he barely whispered. "Roman equivalent of Minerva.

"How old was she?" asked James quietly.

"Forty six," said Remus after a moment.

"Bout the same age as McGonagall," said Peter quietly. "One would guess, I mean. Twins, d'you reckon?"

"Maybe just sisters," said Remus, anguish evident in his face.

"Or maybe just a coincidence," suggested James.

"'Athena McGonagall.'," repeated Remus. "It's got to be her sister."

Their eyes strayed to the staff table. Indeed, McGonagall's head was lowered, and she was holding a tartan handkerchief to her eyes. Professor Flitwick was hovering at her elbow, patting it gently, and Dumbledore had turned to her as well.

"Danger is coming," said Remus quietly. "War is coming."

Sirius finally swallowed. "Let's go," he said, unnecessarily loudly. "Transfiguration. But wait a second – " He closed his eyes tight, waved his wand in a complicated looking way and muttered something.

A bouquet of beautiful, sweet smelling flowers, jasmines, sprung from the end of Sirius's wand and lay on the table. Sirius picked them up and put them carefully in his bag.

"Who's the lucky girl?" asked James suspiciously.

"They're for McGonagall," said Sirius, in a tone just a shade from curt.

"Good idea," said Remus. He waved his own wand in a similar fashion and produced lavenders. James imitated him and out came lilies, to the very brief smirking of Sirius, and after a few tries, fat zinnias popped out of Peter's wand. Three bouquets were hidden away carefully in three bags, and the four Marauders walked toward Transfiguration uncharacteristically quietly and briskly.

In a way that had the four Marauders mentally question reality, McGonagall was five minutes late to her own class. She greeted them very brusquely, and her eyes were a dark shade of red.

Sirius signaled to his friends, and they stood up at once. One by one, first Remus, then James, then Peter, and finally Sirius, they walked forward and presented McGonagall with the flowers, then apologized gravely for the incident.

Before sitting down, Sirius murmured something only she could hear. "We know about Remus, and don't plan to care. He's survived for six years, and we're all sure that your sister will too. She has all four of our regards."

For the first time in living memory, Minerva McGonagall was speechless.

–

"Well, that was a cheery third day back," said Remus dryly when the four retired to the dorm that night.

"At least we didn't have Tanarm," sighed Sirius as he sprawled back on his bed.

"By the way – " Remus suddenly had a scary teacher look in his eye, "have you three finished your werewolf essays?"

"Of all things to encourage us to work on," whined James.

"_None _of you have finished it, am I right?" said Remus dangerously.

"It was hard, okay?" said Peter. "Especially knowing exactly why it was assigned!"

Remus's face flashed angry for a few seconds, then he regained, if somewhat forced, calmness. "Right," he said, "but it's still work, and you still have to do it."

"Someday, Remmy," said James, rolling over, "someday you're gonna go the Dark Side and become a teacher."

"DON'T CALL ME REMMY!" shouted Remus, startling his friends.

"We need a new name for you," decided Sirius. "Since you didn't like Chocoholic, I think we should call you Moony."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Or you could put a sign over me, a big red sign, shouting out HE'S A WEREWOLF," he suggested.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "It's not _that _obvious," he argued. "We'll just spread the rumour that you're obsessed with Astronomy. Won't be too hard."

Remus looked imploringly at his other friends. "James – Peter – "

"I like that," decided James. "Moony it is."

"Sure," agreed Peter.

"Mooooooony," chorused the three Marauders, and Remus held his head in his hands.

"WHY AM I CURSED WITH INSANE FRIENDS?" he screamed as his friends took up a strange kind of war dance around him, chanting _"Moony Moony Moony __Moony!"_

He was enjoying it much more than he let on.

Just then, he let out an involuntary cry of pain as he fell back onto his bed, more pangs rapidly overtaking him.

His friends stopped war dancing. Six eyes flew onto and locked onto Remus. "Moony!" chorused three voices, but not in the happily mocking tone anymore.

"I'm fine," whispered Remus through gritted teeth, mentally hating himself for spoiling all their fun. His eyes were screwed tightly shut and he gave off the impression of one fighting off severe pain.

"Remus, what's up?" asked Sirius, alarmed.

"What day is it?" gasped Remus as another pulse of pain went over him.

"Remus – ?"

"_What day is it?_" hissed Remus. James promptly scrambled for a calender. It took him a while time to find one, as their room would not exactly win the prize for Neatest Dormitory Ever.

"It's Wednesday, Remus," said James after a moment.

"Wednesday, Saturday, I don't _care_ – what's the _date?"_

"The fourth of September, Remus."

Remus closed his eyes even tighter. "Fourth – fourth – " he mumbled wildly.

"Should I get Madam Pomfrey?" asked Peter anxiously.

"No!" said Remus loudly. "I'm okay – I just – need – to think for a second – hang on, please just hang on..the fourth..the fifth.._the sixth.._ah."

Remus had apparently found in his brain what he was looking for.

"Full moon," he said, opening his eyes with some difficulty and focusing on his friends.

Peter shrieked. "_Tonight?_"

"No," said Remus quickly, "of course not, don't be silly...Friday. It's Friday. Yes, this happens, this always happens, I'm all right – it's just pre-turning-into-a-wolf syndrome, that's all." He grinned weakly, then winced. "I'm fine," he said again emphatically as Sirius and James showed signs of alarm. "Cold, though," he added. "And with a strange craving for chocolate." He slid gingerly from his bed and walked slowly across the room until he reached his suitcase. He reached into a hidden compartment and extracted a chocolate bar.

"So that's where you keep it all," observed James.

"Someday, I'm going to go there," declared Sirius, "and steal it all."

Remus glared. "_You wouldn't._"

Sirius grinned. "Of course I would."

Remus deliberated. "You would," he agreed.

"By the way, Moony," said James casually as Remus unwrapped the chocolate bar, glaring at Sirius, "where do you Transform?"

"Why do you ask?" asked Remus, biting into it.

"...Just wondering."

"I'm not telling you," said Remus, "because knowing you guys, you'd try to sneak in and help me. And then I'd kill you, literally, and that would be – " He broke off.

James looked as if he was going to answer, but bit back a response. "Fair enough," he agreed.

"Now you three would do best to start your essays," said Remus warningly.

"Moony," wailed Sirius, "you sound like a TEACHER."

Remus only rolled his eyes. "Get to _work," _he said in a threatening sort of tone.

"Have _you _finished it?" asked Peter hopefully.

"Yes," said Remus, "and you can't copy it, but I'll look it over for you when you're done, Peter. You guys as well if you like." He grinned wryly. "I'm pretty good with werewolves."

"I wonder why," said Sirius seriously before all four Marauders collapsed in laughter.

–

"James," said Remus patiently a few hours later, "the werewolf has a _tufted _snout, not a pointy one, and silver is _not _poisonous to it."

"Since when?" grumbled James. "_Everyone _knows the only way to end a werewolf is with silver.." James was rather tired from all the work he had done.

"Well, we know better and know that a piece of homework that only got nine out of ten will do the job quite well," said Sirius philosophically. Remus threw a quill at him.

"I've touched silver loads of times," Remus pointed out. "Sickles are made of silver, remember, and that watch at Christmas."

"Well, werewolves just go against nature, don't they?" grumbled James.

Sirius nodded. "They also go against fun and pranks," he said seriously. Remus threw a piece of parchment at him.

The evening passed quietly, with Remus attempting to explain real werewolves versus fairy tale werewolves to his friends, with Sirius's stupid comments inserted every so often. Several quills, shards of parchment, and even a purple inkpot filled with red ink at one point, were wasted at the cranium portion of Sirius Black's anatomy that night.

After the essays were completed, the inkpots capped, the quills put away, and Sirius's hair was mostly void of scarlet, the four marauder's climbed into bed. Remus and Peter fell asleep quickly, but James and Sirius lay awake for a long time.

James could not sleep. He lay and lay and lay, blocked out all thought and imagined himself in the center of a wavy ocean, forced hies eyes tightly shut, but he _could not sleep._

Giving in, he picked up a mirror from his bedside. "Sirius," he whispered.

There was a rustling on the other side of the dormitory, then a tired face appeared in the mirror. "Hey," said the face.

"Were you asleep?"

"No, I couldn't. Not after all that happened today.."

"What, being drenched in red ink?"

Sirius made a face. "Shut up_. _You know, with McGonagall and Voldemort and Moony's prewerewolf syndrome.."

"Yeah." There was silence for a few moments. "Sirius?"

"Mm?"

"Why don't you want me to say that you say Voldemort?"

Sirius's face darkened. "I can't say," he said quietly.

"Why not?"

"Because if I do," he said simply, "you'll hate me."

"I won't, I swear," swore James.

"You will."

"Remus is a _werewolf, _and I don't hate him."

"This is different..oh, all right, but you can't tell _anyone._"

"No problem."

Sirius took a deep breath. "James, you know Voldemort has been rumored to be rising for about four years now, right, and all the killings and – and horrible stuff have been going on, for four years?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, for four years, Mum and Dad have taught Regulus and me not to speak the name of Voldemort with fear, but with..with respect."

James stifled a gasp. He knew the Blacks were evil, but not so terribly so. He regained his sense of mind, however, when he saw the pained expression on Sirius's face. "Well, you don't believe it," he said sensibly. "So it's all right."

"But I used to," said Sirius, looking more tortured than ever. "I used to think they had the right idea, before Andromeda knocked some sense into me. I thought..I thought..I thought that Voldemort would finally fix the world up." He groaned and buried his face in a pillow.

"Well, you don't anymore," pointed out James softly. "And that's what matters."

Sirius came back into view. "Seriously, James?"

"Yeah."

Sirius's face broke into a smile. "Thanks, mate."

"No problem."

"Now that I've told you something, you have to tell me something."

"Well, whaddya wanna know?"

"Why did you ask Moony where he Transforms?"

James's face took on the evasive expression he had when he wanted to avoid a question. "Just curious."

"Liar," said Sirius, not fooled. "Tell me. _Now._"

"All right, but you gotta _swear _not to tell Moony. He'll kill me and then bring me back and kill me again and then torture me and then chop me into little tiny pieces and _incendio _my remains and then juggle the fireballs and then _destroy the ashes, _even though that's physically impossible."

"Is that crazy?"

"Crazier. Okay, well, I was thinking about how rough and horrible he has it every month, and I thought, I dunno, that maybe somehow we could sneak in there and make it, I dunno, easier for him."

"You're right. That is completely mental."

"But Sirius, there has to be a way," insisted James. "To make it easier on him, or something, somehow. I don't know how. But I'm going to think of something."

"What, gonna turn us all into animals?" snorted Sirius.

James was quiet for a moment. Then a reluctant idea of amazement spread across his face. "_Sirius,_" he breathed, "that's _brilliant!"_

Sirius looked startled. "James, don't be insane."

"No – listen! Animagi! You, me, and Peter could become – _Animagi!"_

Sirius paused for a moment, then an identical look of amazement spread across his face. "I'm a GENIUS!"

"Listen, set your wand," instructed James, "to desperately early tomorrow morning. We'll get up _really _early, and then we'll go to the library – crazy, I know – and do some research. _Don't _tell Remus. Or Peter, for that matter."

"Of course. And maybe ask McGonagall – hypothetically, of course – for some help. _Hypothetically_."

"Of_ course. _And now we are going to sleep."

"Good-night, James."

"Good-night, Sirius. We're geniuses."

"Yes, yes we are."

* * *

**A/N: Yo, guys, it's been a while, hasn't it? And sadly, this is gonna be my last update for about two weeks, I'm going on holiday :D So, even though I _might _get something up tomorrow, the chances are about one in a million, knowing me. Soooo...make my day and leave a review, begging for more..maybe I'll be motivated! To write more! In my notebook! ..Or something.**

**Kay, and also, I've been politely told that my story is a bit of an AU, which I say to, yup, definitely. :D But just a smidge. Like the Remus thing, and I totally cut out the meeting-on-the-train part, for Marauderyness's sake.  
**

**Ooh, and today's shoutout goes to fruiTmajik, who is completely awesome. Just sayin'. But of course you ALL are, every last one of you! YAY!**

**Exceed the limits of awesomeness..review!  
**


	29. Ideas

**A/N: You guys are really really **_**really **_**convincing, y'know? :P So here we go. It's desperately short, but something, at least! This chapter's dedicated to swimdiva87, who got on her knees for me! I feel so touched :D And of course, thanks to the ever-present **_**stina whatever, **_**and Jezabel Raewin. Thanks, guys, I owe you.**

** SO..here is my debt, paid off in full:**

Chapter Twenty Nine

Ideas

"Ugh, this is complicated.."

"Stir four lacewings into a bucket of caster oil...ew, we have to _drink _it..."

"And making it in the first place doesn't sound much fun.."

"And then we have to learn this spell..this is _not _going to be easy."

"What are you two doing?"

James and Sirius slammed their books shut. "Nothing," they said together, equally guilty looks overtaking their faces as Remus stared at them.

"Oh _really,_" he said suspiciously. "Then what are you doing in the library at six a.m?"

For a few moments, James and Sirius were at a loss for words. Then they both began babbling at the exact same time.

"Well there's this prank – "

"Bellatrix is scared of lacewing – "

"And I read that caster oil sharpens it – "

"And the library, no one would suspect pranksters going to a library – "

"And – "

"I'm going to ask you three questions," cut in Remus, "and if you answer them honestly, and if your answers aren't bad, I'll leave you alone.

"Does this involve me?"

"Yes," said James after a second and a very guilty look.

"Does this involve getting killed or hurt or maimed, me or you?"

"Not technically," said Sirius carefully. "Not if we do it right. In fact..it technically – "

Reading his mind, James kicked his ankle and Sirius shut up.

Remus rolled his eyes. "When is this going to take place, in the near or far future?"

"Far," said James and Sirius at once.

"Probably very far," added Sirius.

Remus sighed. "All right. Just make sure you do do it right."

"Right-o," said James brightly. "Now why don't you go back to bed, huh? What are you doing up so early anyways?"

"I woke up and saw that you guys weren't here," said Remus evenly, "and I worried, because when you're both gone at six a.m it can only mean trouble."

"We should have a way," said Sirius suddenly, "to keep track of each other."

Remus and James both turned to him. "What?"

"You know, a way to keep track of each other," said Sirius eagerly as plans began to form in his mind. "A map – a map of Hogwarts! With dots that represent us! In fact, why not extend it to dots representing everyone in the school? Then we could spy on people to our hearts' desire, and pranks would be so much easier.." Sirius was off and running, mentioning several different spells they could use, how and when to explore the school, and the many different uses that the map could provide...

"Sirius," said Remus gently, when he had hit a block, "I just have one thing to say to you about that idea."

"What?" asked Sirius excitedly.

"It is _completely mental." _Sirius's face fell.

"I'm sorry," said Remus, in tones that implied he was nothing of the sort, "but it is. Not to mention probably breaking seventy three gazillion school rules into pieces with all the detail you want to make it, by having to go around, sneaking into offices – put it out of your head, Sirius, and I'm going back to the dorm."

"Okay," sighed Sirius, in a way James considered thoroughly unconvincingly.

"You're not going to put it out of your head, are you?" whispered James as Remus disappeared through the door.

Sirius smiled impishly. "Not quite _out.._maybe in a little nook. My Prank Planning nook."

"I like the way your mind works," responded James before turning back to the book on Animagi.

And thus, the idea of the Marauders' Map was born.


	30. Dreaming

**A/N: Bittersweet x updating? :O :O THE HORROR THE HORROR THE HORROR OF SHOCK! Yes, I _did_ get back from my vacation a week or so ago, but. Here's a tip: Don't miss school for a vacation, because you will stress out so badly about all the work that's needed to be done that you won't update anything for a looooooooooooooooooong time. Or write. I've been on chapter chapter forty two of this story for like six weeks. Which is why I got very discouraged and I was all, AUUUGH ENOUGH WITH THIS STORY! That is my convoluted explanation. Please stop throwing things at me.**

**WARNING: For a couple chapters after this, we have _utter insanity. _Like, it doesn't even make much sense. CALM BEFORE A STORM. (hinthinthint: VOLDEEMORRTTT..check the author's note in chapter twenty six..)  
**

Chapter Thirty

Dreams

James, Sirius, Remus and Peter had just played the best prank in the history of pranks. In fact, it was so good that they had sent Tanarm running from the school in tears, and earned fifty million and five points from Gryffindor, and as they strutted through the halls, awesomer than everyone, there were stares, impressed and awed stares, even from the Slytherins. All the girls in Hogwarts were shoving against each other to approach them, but James only had eyes for one. A certain redhead with piercing green eyes, not exactly in the crowd, standing almost hesitantly on the outskirts, eying James with an inexplicable look in her eyes...a mixture of happiness and slight fear..

and love, James realized.

Or at least a very strong, strong like.

He stepped smoothly away from the crowd and walked swiftly over to Lily Evans. He bent down on one knee and reached into his pocket. Conveniently enough there was a ring. He pulled it out and slid it onto Lily's finger.

"Marry me, Lily," he whispered.

A smile spread rapidly across the redhead's face. "Of course!" she whispered. "Of course I'll marry you. Tomorrow?"  
"I'm afraid not," said James nobly. "I have much to accomplish before I get married, I have to defeat Voldemort, for one."

Suddenly, there was a galloping of hooves!

On a big black steed rushed in Voldemort. He was a figure in a black cloak, somewhat similar to the Nazgul James's mother painted after reading_ Lord of the Rings _to him.

"I WILL CONQUER YOU!" shouted James. He pulled out his wand and pointed it to the black cloaked figure. "_LIJASIREPERRY!" _

Voldemort let out a terrible scream, and he was no more...

Wedding bells were playing. Lily's robes were morphing into a white gown.

"Oy! James! Wake up or you'll be late for History of Magic!"

"Huh?" James jerked awake. "But...Voldemort...he was gone..and Lily.."

Sirius was leaning over him, smiling. "Were you dr_eami_ng about Li-_ly_?" he asked in a singsong teasing voice.

James punched him. "NO," he said.

"Liar," said Sirius cheerfully. "Now, come on, it's History of Magic time."

"Why don't you wake up Moony?" grumbled James, pulling himself out of his bed.

"He's already up," said Sirius, throwing his friend his robes.

"Whoa, is it that late?" asked James worriedly. "All right, all right, I'm up.." He sighed and slid into the bathroom, where he stared out the window..

It was still dark..how strange..but James was too tired to comprehend it at exactly..

And then his eyes touched the clock and it hit him like a tonna blocks.

"SIRIUS BLACK!" shouted James, tearing out of the bathroom. "IT'S THREE THIRTY IN THE MORNING!"

Sirius was rolling around on the floor, laughing. "I can't believe you fell for that! It's only the oldest trick in the book – "

But Sirius was unable to continue, as a pair of hands that may or may not have belonged to James Potter wrapped around his throat and attempted to throttle him.

A few minutes later, both boys were back in their respective beds. "James?" said Sirius.

"What?"

"Why were you muttering 'I have much to accomplish before I get married'?"

James went highly red. "Shut up."

Sirius cackled. "Oh, poor James..."

"I_ said _shut _up._"

"But what if I don't feel like it?"

"Then you die."

"Oh, okay." There was another silence.

"You going to marry her, James?" asked Sirius.

"NO!"

"But – "

"Sirius, I hope you know how dead you are."

"Indeed I do."

"Go to sleep."

"Good night."

"It's four o'clock."

"Good morning, then."

"All right."

"All right."

"Good morning."

"Good morning."


	31. The Best Type of Pranks

Chapter Thirty One

The Best Type of Pranks

When Sirius woke up early the next morning, he had the odd sensation something was strangely amiss. He shook it off quickly, the events of four thirty slipping temporarily from his mind.

None of his other friends were awake, he noted inanely. Remus was, of course, out like a light. Rather incongruously, Sirius realized that his friend's deep and long sleeps were probably another symptom of his lycanthropy – turning into a whole new creature once a month must take a lot out of you. Peter always snored soundly until he was woken up. Strangely, though, James was asleep too. James was one of those people, like Sirius, who woke up unnaturally early every day without any provoking.

In the back of his well-pranked mind, suspicions began to form. A prankster from his early days and someone who had been pranked back several times in his life, Sirius Black knew that he had to tread with caution.

He tiptoed carefully across the floorboards, jumping over anything that even seemed suspicious. He was fairly sure he reached the bathroom safely.

Then, he looked in the mirror.

"JAMES POTTER! I'M GOING TO _MURDER _YOU TEN TIMES, BRING YOU BACK, MURDER YOU AGAIN, THROW YOU IN A COFFIN, TEAR YOU BACK UP, MURDER YOU AGAIN, BURY YOU AND THEN _DANCE ON YOUR GRAVE!"_

Sirius Black had turned into Lily Evans.

His normally mangy shoulder length black hair that he was so very proud of had turned a bright, shiny, _neat _red that passed his elbows. His grey eyes that had caused him to earn several Lord of the Rings nicknames that he liked quite a bit had turned a bright, shining green. And – this was by far the most crude part – he was wearing_ lip gloss, mascara, and eyeshadow._

It was Lily Evans as James had first laid eyes on.

And the worst part was, despite his hair and makeup and eyes, his face was still his own. You could easily tell that this was not in fact Lily Evans.

_ "_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He ducked into the sink and began to rub furiously at the makeup. "JAMES POTTER, I'M GOING TO – "

"Cry?" smirked James, leaning against the doorframe of the bathroom. "And don't bother washing it off. It won't go until you look Lily Evans in the eye ten separate times."

Sirius let out a strangled scream and leaped at James, who evaded him easily. "JAMES! TURN ME BACK THIS INSTANT!"

"But this is so much of an improvement," said James sneakily. Sirius stared at him for half a second, then lunged again. This time, he caught him, drew his palm back, and whacked him over the head.

"Prepare to be pranked," he hissed.

"What's going – _ahggghhhhhhhh! _WHY IS LILY EVANS IN OUR DORMITORY?" Remus leaped back into bed and covered himself completely with blankets.

James roared with laughter. Sirius looked as if he was about to kill someone.

"It's me," Sirius said grimly.

Remus stared. "_Sirius? _But – what – oh my God – _James, take it off of him!"_

James stopped laughing and stared. "How did you – "

"Experience," cut in Remus. He shuddered slightly. "Very _bad _experience."

The I want to kill someone expression on Sirius's face faded to be replaced by a strange mixture of wonder, glee, fright, and shock. "What the – ?"

"Experiences I am not at liberty to explain," said Remus, "but I can tell you that this spell – did you use _change mihi iam ut Lily Evansa?"_

"Yes," said James gleefully.

"It can have lasting effects."

Both Sirius and James froze.

"James," said Sirius in a very scary voice.

"Y-yes?" said James, terrified.

"I'm.

"Going.

"To.

"KILL YOU!"

"All right all right all right!" yelled James as Sirius let out a roar of rage and leaped on him, wand outstretched. "Um – um – what was it – ?"

"_Change mihi tergum!_ Say it! NOW!"

"C-_change mihi tergum!"_

Sirius froze in midair and let out a deep, long sigh of apparent relief, as if someone was giving him a massage. Then he fell entirely limp.

"What happened?" croaked James, looking terrified. "Whadda I do?"

"Used very strong magic," said Remus grimly. "He'll be knocked out for a couple of minutes, but when he turns back he'll be entirely normal. Unless of course something goes wrong and he get's stuck with long hair or eyeshadow. He'll kill you."

James only shuddered.

"By the way," he said after a few minutes of silence had passed, "will you ever tell us about your Experience with this spell?"

Remus considered. "Perhaps," he said. "Perhaps. Oh, look, Sirius is coming round...and looks like he's all right..."

Sirius's red hair was shooting up, back into it's untidy yet handsome state of black. His eyes had gone back to their Faramir-esque grey, and his face was clean.

"Mirror," was the first thing he said.

"Sirius, you're all right, you're you again!" said James, relief flowing through his voice.

"MIRROR!" yelled Sirius. He stood up and charged to the bathroom, where he stared at himself for a full five minutes, then heaved a sigh of relief.

He returned to the dorm. "I'm still going to kill you," he said to James.

"I look forward to it."

"And now we'd better get dressed and wake up Peter. But I will never be able to look Lily Evans in the eye again, James Potter, and it is all your fault. I am scarred and traumatized and whatever else you want to call it and I am NEVER SPEAKING TO YOU AGAIN!" Sirius ended this cheerful message in a shout so loud waking up Peter was not necessary.

From somewhere in the castle, a _baa _was sounded.

* * *

**A/N: The best type of pranks, of course, are the ones you play on your best friends. :P**

**All right, so there's this author named potterride, right? And she's amazing. Like, her parodies are _amazing. _My favorite is "Abnormal Friends". Just check my favorite author list for her. READ. REVIEW. LOVE.**

**:D  
**


	32. Taking Notes

Chapter Thirty Two

Notes

_Yo, James,_ read the note passed to said James in History of Magic.

_**I thought you weren't speaking to me?**_James sent back to Sirius.

_Yeah well that was before we got into History of Magic. All is forgiven, brother in spirit, all is forgiven._

_**Sure, NOW it is..**_

_Well, fine, if you don't want to talk to me I'll just take my parchment and send notes to Peter.._

_**Blackmailer.**_

_How is that blackmail?_

_**Because you know full well Moony is being an idiot and taking notes and I have no one else to pass notes to.  
**_

_Yes, that I do. _

_**And then tomorrow, oh joy to the world, we have – druuuumroll pleeeeeease!**_

_Dun dun dun dun DUUUUUUUN.._

_**Our FAVORITE class!**_

_DEFENSE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS!_

_**WITH TANARM!  
**__  
WOOOOO!_

_**Sarcasm to be noted.**_

_Heavily._

_**Very heavily.**_

_So heavily it broke the actual phrase in question._

_**So heavily it's not there anymore.**_

_James?_

_**Hm?**_

_We killed it._

_**Yes. Yes we did.**_

_Is Peter asleep?_

_**Looks like it.**_

___That's a shame._

___**I'm BORED.**  
_

_Yeah...I hate Tanarm._

_**Seriously. Is it his goal in life to torture Remus?**_

_I think so. Well, speak of the devil! Look who's coming to intercept this piece of parchm_

**Why aren't you two taking notes?**

_You shouldn't steal parchment from me, Moony! I didn't even get to finish my word!_

**Too bad.**

_**We're not taking notes because it's much easier to copy from you.**_

**And what if I don't let you?  
**

_Then we die._

_**Horrible deaths.**_

_Of failure._

_**And we flunk right of Hogwarts.**_

_And then we won't become billionares._

_**Well, I'll inherit some.**_

_And if I don't get disowned, I will as well._

_**But it won't be the same.**_

_We're too noble to use our family's money for personal gain._

_**And so you know what will happen to us, Moony?  
**__  
We'll have to come to YOUR house._

_** And eat you out of home.**_

_And prank you all day long._

_**Every day.**_

_And would you like that?_

**..There's a word for what you two are.**

_Really?_

_**What is it?  
**___

**MANUPLITIVE.**

_I like that word. Do you like that word, James?_

_**I like that word, Sirius.**_

The bell rang overhead, and no one could quite figure out why three of the four Marauders were still scribbling away at notes.

–

**A/N: So. A chapter, albeit a short one! Although if I were you, I'd go back and reread this one plus the last two a couple hundred times, particularly if you like fluffy friendship pranky happiness, for two reasons:**

**a. Midterms are right around the corner, which means my brain will be fried with whether or not x=seven million and a half and the like. Algebra should die. Anyone agree?**

**b. After I get around to updating, this will be the last of the happy for a whiiiiiiile. Next chapter is amply titled "There's Nothing You Can Say." BAD BAD things happens. Any predictions?**

** Review, please! :) Oh yeah, and do check out potterride!**


	33. There's Nothing You Can Say

**A/N: So I either love you guys or really, really hate studying...proceed to read BAD THINGS! And I'll see you at the end of the chapter..if you get through it..

* * *

**

Chapter Thirty Three

There's Nothing You Can Say

The year carried on whizzing by just as quickly as the previous had, complete with pranks and notes and Howlers. Before anyone could process it, Christmas break was nearing. On November 19th, something happened that changed life majorly.

"Oh look, I have a letter," said Sirius disgustedly, making a face. "Probably reminding me not to come home. What else is new?"

"Nothing," said James.

"Absolutely nothing," said Peter.

"In the slightest bit," said Remus.

Sirius regarded his friends, slightly amused. "What was the point of that?"

James shrugged. "Attempting to cheer you up," he said.

"The weather," said Peter randomly, not quite sure why.

"Just open it," said Remus. "Oh, yeah, something that's new, it's earlier than usual.."

Sirius sighed. "You're ganging up on me, all three of you," he accused before tearing it open. He read it in silence, mouth opening slightly as he did.

"Wow," he said when he finished it. "Wow. That is all I have to say. Wow. Wow wow wow."

He banged his head against the breakfast table. "WHY?"

Sitting up, he resumed. "Wow. Wow. Wow."

He banged his head once more. "WHY?"

And resumed. "Wow. Wow. Wow."

"WHY?

"Wow. Wow. Wow.

"WHY?"

"SIRIUS," said Remus, who was currently ignoring his _Daily Prophet _owl nipping at him in favor of said Sirius, impatiently. "What did it _say?"_

"It said.." said Sirius. He took a breath. "It _said.._" He paused. "You know what? Just read it." And he pushed it towards his friends, who leaned over it.

_Sirius,_

_ We expect you home for Christmas._

_ -Mother_

"WHOA," yelled James, a tad bit too loudly. "Change of mind, much?"

"What is going _on?" _Sirius demanded of thin air. "I hope they know that I don't _care _what they _expect, _because I'm _not _going 'home.' I am staying right here, thank you very much. Moony – quill, parchment?"

Remus obediently pulled said supplies out of his bag. "_Don't _call me that," he added sternly.

"Whatever, Moony." Sirius began to scratch away at the piece of parchment.

A few minutes of silence passed, only the sound of scribbling away and chewing. Suddenly, from the head table, Dumbledore stood up. "If I may have your attention," he said into his wand, but he didn't have to. As soon as he'd raised himself from his seat, everyone had fallen silent at the look of extremely unusual somberness on his face.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you of your feeding and watering," he said politely, "but I have an importance of what I would say is of considerable importance.

"I deeply regret to tell you that last night, the eight year old Squib sister Morgan, the Muggle mother Lila, and the father, Thomas, of Benjamin Heddly, the seventh year Gryffindor, was killed by an unknown follower of Voldemort."

There was a general gasp.

"As one would suppose," Dumbledore went on gravely, "Benjamin was removed from the school." There was a pause, and the people closer than most to the High Table would later swear that there was a glistening of water in Dumbledore's twinkling eyes. "Unfortunately..before Benjamin could be released to safety..he, too, was... murdered."

There was a horrible silence where half of Hogwart's world came crashing down – the half who knew Benjamin. Others, who had no idea who Benjamin was, were hit hard all the same – most of them, in any case – and those who knew him by name, or face, or association, like the Marauders – were hit just as hard as those who knew him.

"NO!" The scream came from a tall, black haired girl at the very end of the Ravenclaw table. She stood straight up. "NO!" In between the shock and horror that had clodded his mind, Sirius vaguely recalled the girl as Selena Abmberosy, Benjamin's cousin. She set everyone off, and there were screams of anguish all down the tables – except on, to Sirius's disgust, the Slytherin table, which was sitting motion and emotionless – and a few people, the Marauders included, sat rigid in horror and disbelief. Down the Gryffindor table, several girls, including Lily Evans and a few of her friends – Merrisa Anehem, Cara Rahl, Marlene McKinnon – had been reduced to tears.

McGonagall stood up, and the entire Hall fell entirely silent. With a flick she colored the drapes black and then held her wand aloft.

"To Benjamin Heddley," she said, and although her voice echoed through the hall it was not amplified in any way.

"To Benjamin Heddley," rumbled the entire school, so loudly it was slightly intimidating.

"As it should," murmured Peter.

"What?"

"Intimidating – I mean, the whole school, it sounds kinda intimidating, and it _should. _We're showing... You-Know-Who that we mean business." The Marauders murmured agreement.

Dumbledore stood up once more. "I find it unnecessary to say," he said in a shockingly stern voice, "that security has doubled very strongly in this school. No student is to be outside of school without supervision. This, to an extent, _does include Quidditch. _No student is to be on the pitch after five o'clock, and no practice will exceed six o'clock, no exceptions." There was a pause, and it was with a slightly unsteady voice Dumbledore continued. "Try outs – to..take Benjamin's..place, for the Gryffindor Chaser position, will be held on – "

The rest of the sentence was drowned out by sobs.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, maybe they aren't _that _bad, as we've never actually met Ben. BUT FEAR NOT! They get worse! The next chapter is entitled "There's Nothing You Can Do" and if anyone catches the reference to what song those two titles coincide with, then I will be very impressed indeed.**

**Also, I randomly added three Legend of the Seeker references. Anyone catch them?  
**

**Review! Tell me if the things were BAD BAD BAD enough, or TOO bad. Either way, THEY WILL GET WORSE! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  
**


	34. There's Nothing You Can Do

Chapter Thirty Four

There's Nothing You Can Do

Classes were canceled for the rest of the day, and most people retreated to their dormitory to weep or exchange or receive condolences. The Marauders opted for the library, where they guessed even less people than usual would be.

Plus, Peter reflected, none of them would mind seeing Andromeda.

As they had guessed (hoped) the library appeared completely empty, with the exception of Madam Pince, the librarian, who, instead of polishing books or yelling at people, was sitting, looking much smaller than usual, holding a laced handkerchief to her beady eyes. As the Marauders passed the desk, she handed them each a bookmark.

It was a deep red, and in sprawling golden letters read:

_ As I cry, I think of Benjamin Heddley,_

_ who never will again._

_ as I laugh, I think of Benjamin Heddley,_

_ who never will again._

_ and as I read, I will always think of Benjamin Heddley,_

_ who loved all books._

_ And I will believe that Benjamin_

_ is still reading._

Peter forced himself to hold back tears. The Marauders murmured thanks and hurried away to the romance section to find Andromeda.

Sure enough, Andromeda was there, but instead of running her fingers along rows of books, or even reading, she was holding a sobbing girl with long black hair in a desperate hug.

"Oh no," muttered Peter. "Why is she crying?"

"That's Selena Abmerberosy, Benjamin's cousin," hissed Remus. "Do you realize she just lost her entire extended family?"

"I don't see why she's so sad, though," said Sirius absently, still looking at Andromeda and Selena.

The Marauders whirled around and stared at him. Sirius blinked, then slapped himself. "Oh, that sounded awful – I mean, it's just that – I've studied this, Mum's made me – the Abmerbosies are one of the most prominent pure blood families. I thought it was a full Slytherin streak. And the Heddleys – Thomas Heddley was an Abmerbosy, but he married a Muggle and got disowned and took his wife's name. And Selena's family – I'd suppose – hates him, all the Abmerbosies do. So.." He trailed off uncertainly, then rolled his eyes. "Why do I know all this?"

Andromeda had seen the Marauders by this point, and she made shooing motions with her hands. As they hastily turned to go, Selena looked up.

"No, Andromeda," she said hoarsely. "Let them stay. They're Gryffindors, aren't they?"

Remus, Sirius, James, and Peter nodded cautiously.

"Did you guys – k-know – Ben?"

They paused, then slowly slid into seats facing the two Ravenclaws. "I knew he was the best Quidditch player on the team," said Sirius tentatively.

A smile crept onto Selena's face. "He'd want to be remembered for that," she whispered. "He loved to play Quidditch. He was even teaching his little sister, even though she was a S-squib. Can you b-believe that? And she was getting so good – she was getting so good – "

She looked for a moment as if she was about to burst into tears once more, but held herself together. "I guess – I guess it was a – a b-blessing for him to die, too," she said quietly. "He would've diedanyways without his family.."

"Um, Selena?" said Remus tentatively. "Didn't you know...weren't you informed beforehand?"

An extremely ugly look overtook Selena's features. "No," she said bitterly. "Of course not. My family is of _higher class _than Benjamin's. My family probably doesn't care. Our dads hate each other – at least, mine hates his. My family probably celebrating." Selena took a quavering breath. "I know..I know I shouldn't hole up here crying..I should keep him in my thoughts, keep them all remembered, alive..even though..but I can't help it..they were the only family I had who cared for me at all.."

A strange look had flicked across Andromeda's face that had nothing to do with her friend. Sirius understood why. It was the same thing he would say, if Andromeda would die – although he probably would never admit it.

"Oh, Lena," said Andromeda softly, threading her hand through the smaller girl's black hair. "Don't be silly. You cry as much as you like. And _you _four – _shoo. _I'll see you later."

"No," said Selena, standing up. "No, I'm going to see Professor Dumbledore, Meda. Thanks so much for everything. I have to make arrangements..I don't think..I don't think I'll be able to go to lessons tomorrow..and I can't stay here..it's not..it's just too..too much for me here..but I can't go..home. I don't have a home anymore."

"You don't need one, Selena," said Andromeda softly. "You're of age. You can leave."  
"I can't," said Selena. "They wouldn't let me."

"Then run away," said Andromeda. "Run away, Lena. Find yourself a home, a husband, build yourself a family. You can do it."

"I can't," said Selena softly.

"You _can,_" said Andromeda, and something in her voice gave Sirius an inkling of an idea..

but he pushed it out of his head. Andromeda would never leave him.

"I'm going to see Dumbledore," repeated Selena. "I'll see you, Andromeda." She walked out of the library, Andromeda staring after her with a strange look on her face.  
"She has to," she said, apparently to herself. "She can't keep going on like this..she'll go mad.."  
"Um, Andromeda? We're still here, y'know," said Sirius tentatively.

Andromeda looked up. "Sit down," she said quietly. "I s'pose you guys are here to talk about B-Benjamin?"

"Yeah," said James.

"I never really got to know him," said Remus quietly, "and now I feel so awful for not..getting..you know..getting to know him..and now I'll never get a chance." His friends murmured agreement.  
"Well _I _knew him," said Andromeda, voice quavering, "and I'd bid you four lucky...it's...it's _horrible, _knowing you''ll never see him, never laugh with him, never speak with him again...never go to him for advice, never discuss a novel with him, never share a Butterbeer with him.." Her voice had grown constricted. "Selena introduced us, we got along so well...we used to meet up with him at Hogsmeade, he was such a good friend..and now..it's _torture, _knowing he'll never be alive again..I miss him so much.."

Andromeda sighed heavily and wiped her eye. "Listen to me, carrying on like this," she muttered. "Selena's just lost everyone she cares for..and now where is she going to _go _if she won't run away.."

The lunch bell rang. The Marauders exchanged glances.

"I'm starved," admitted James.

"Me too," the others muttered.

"You guys go ahead to lunch," said Sirius as his friends stood up. "I'll be around in a minute.."

Peter, Remus, and James nodded. They hurried off, and Sirius watched them leave before turning to Andromeda.

"We could invite her to stay with us," suggested he. "Selena. For Christmas. Mum and Aunt Druscilla will like her."

Andromeda rolled her eyes. "You're crazy, Sirius. Completely off your rocker. Selena is the rough in a family of diamonds. Ravenclaw, dating a Gryffindor, supported the Heddleys. And anyways, I'm _not _going home for Christmas."

"I am," sighed Sirius, retrieving the letter from his pocket and handing it to Andromeda. As she read it, rage slowly enveloped her features.

"The – nerve," she said, slamming the letter back onto the table. "The _nerve._"

"I'm not going," said Sirius immediately.

"Yes you are," said Andromeda. "You don't want a reason for them to get even more angry, all right? You're going. This once."

"Come, Andromeda," begged Sirius. "_Please _come. It'll be torture. Torture. If you came.."

Andromeda shook her head. "I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because..because.." Andromeda sighed. "I can't tell you just yet," she said quietly. "But I will. I promise. But I can't home, not this time."

Sirius sighed and glared at her. "I'll go," he said in a harder voice, "but I won't like it. And I'm mad at you."

He turned to storm away. Andromeda watched him go sadly.

Just before he disappeared from view, he turned. "Meda.." he said hesitantly.

"Yeah?"

"You're not going to run away, are you?"

Andromeda was, at this point, immersed in a book. Sirius waited for a few seconds, but when it became clear Andromeda was not going to answer him, he sighed and left the library.

Andromeda put the book down. "Oh, Sirius," she whispered, twisting the engagement ring that she'd recently obtained on her finger. "I'm so sorry."

* * *

**I warned you guys! Also, don't flame me for getting the timeline off, I _know _Andromeda doesn't technically marry until their fourth year. She won't. There will be consequences. Mwahahaaha!**

**Don't worry too much...Sirius will forgive Andromeda...probably...someday...and his homegoing might not turn out _that _bad...ALSO! This is the last of the bad chapters for about..oh, two or three, at least. Then it gets bad again. But y'know how it is.**

**Congratulations to MoonyJude7, for being the first to guess the correct song, and to everyone else who guessed, too. :D Oh yeah, wish me luck on my math final tomorrow.. :/ How about this, once it's over I'll put up TWO chapters! That is..if I get enough reviews.. - cackle -**


	35. But There's No Way You Can Run

**A/N: Heyyyyyy all! This is me, in an incredibly wonderful mood because I totally got an awesome grade on my math midterm! JOYYYYY! - dances - Sadly, a Science one is coming up. - grumble grumble grumble - But I will probably pass it. Probably. Encourage me to study. Or something.**

**Also, FF dot net makes this chapter look TOTALLY LAME. The bold print down there was in this awesome colorful font and it JUST LOOKED SO AMAZING. Now it's just, like, bold. Sigh. Oh well, use your imagination and make this crummy chapter look totally uncrummy. :D  
**

Chapter Thirty Five

But There's No Way You Can Run From the Truth

Time went on. Weeks passed. But life at Hogwarts was quieter after that. The teachers were distracted, the students were subdued, even the ghosts seemed depressed. Moaning Myrtle would scream day in and day out. Needless to say everyone was glad the night before Christmas break.

_Nearly _everyone.

The drapes in the Hall were still black. Conversation was little. It didn't feel like Christmas at all.

That was, until...

There was an enormous bang, as if a gunshot had streaked through the school. Several people screamed. One girl fainted. Dumbledore looked on with mild interest.

Fireworks were shooting through the air in all colors. They lasted for what seemed like hours, and everyone, even the teachers, sat mesmerized, staring at them.

Slowly, they faded away, but instead of being replaced by air, a picture, made out of what looked like a thousand little dots, was slowly taking form. A face, then a considerable amount of bright red hair, a dented smile, freckles, broad shoulders and skinny arms, then eyes, the happiest eyes ever...

Benjamin Heddley waved down at the Great Hall.

There was another BANG, and above Benjamin words formed.

_**REST IN PEACE**_

_** Benjamin Heddley**_

_**Who Will Never Stop Smiling!**_

_**THE MARAUDERS WISH YOU A VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS**_

_**AND SO DOES BENJAMIN**_

_**wherever he may be...  
**_

The letters faded slowly, and applause filled the entire Hall. After it had died away, quite a few people were holding handkerchiefs to their eyes, and Dumbledore was smiling serenely for the first time in too long.

"I couldn't have said it better myself," he said solemnly. "Thank you, Marauders, whoever you are." With a wave of his wand, the black drapes had returned to their natural colors. "The period of mourning is over in Hogwarts, thanks to that spectacular good bye we viewed. To whomever House the Marauders belong to, I will now award fifty points apiece." There was more applause.

Four boys by the names of James, Remus, Peter and Sirius sat in their seats, holding their wands straight, grinning.

"Glad we got that out of the way," said James cheerfully, stuffing a roll in his mouth.


	36. So Keep Holding On

**Warning: Walburga Black gets what's coming to her.**

Chapter Thirty Six

So Keep Holding On

"I'm staying here for Christmas," Remus reminded his friends. "Mum and Dad are going on holiday and I really don't feel like seeing my relatives." The Marauders were walking to the station to get home for Christmas, Remus accompanying them.

"I'll stay with you," said Sirius quickly. "For moral support."

"You will not," said Remus dryly. "You don't need another reason for your mother to yell at you over the summer."

"You sound like Andromeda," grumbled Sirius, kicking a rock.

"That's good?" asked Remus.

"_No," _said Sirius, and his friends left it at that.

"We're here, then," said Remus quietly as the train station came into view. Sirius groaned.

"Merry Christmas, Moony," he said gloomily. Peter and James echoed him.

"Merry Christmas, guys," Remus replied. "Good luck, Sirius."

"Thanks, I'll need it," said Sirius mournfully.

"Bye, Remus," said James, approaching the train. "Have a great holiday. Won't you be lonely, though?"

"He'll have Meda for company," muttered Sirius scornfully, only so James heard. "But yeah," he added, in a louder voice. "Try to find the kitchens if you're seriously depressed."

"I'll live," Remus assured, grinning wryly. A few minutes later, the three leaving Marauders had boarded the train and were chugging away. Remus watched the train disappear, then began walking back to Hogwarts, slight depression tingling at him.

–

"In the words of Remus, slight depression is tingling at me," said Sirius dramatically.

"Well, that's improvement," observed James. "You used to be crazy depressed."

"Still am," grumbled Sirius.

"Oh."

"Exploding Snap, anyone?" said Peter loudly. Sirius and James agreed, and the rest of the journey was passed very happily, with only the occasional disaster and only one incidence of Sirius's robe sleeve setting on fire.

"We're here," said James after a few joyful hours had passed.

"Darn," said Sirius dispassionately.

"We'd better change," said Peter.

"Hang on, Sirius, can I talk to you in the aisle a second?" said James, swiftly making up his mind.

"Sure," said Sirius, looking slightly confused.

"What is going on between you and Andromeda?" James demanded when they were alone. "You've been in a foul mood ever since you talked to her, you keep mentioning her all snide, you've been miserable! What's _up _with you?"

Sirius shoved his hands into his pockets and focused on a spot directly above James's head. "She's refused to come home," he said tonelessly, "and I think – I _think – _that's she's going to run away."

James's breath caught in his throat. "Run away?"

"Leave me," specified Sirius. "James, be my witness that I swear I will never, ever, _ever _forgive her if she leaves."

He turned to go back into the compartment. James caught him by the arm.

"Even if she does leave," he said in a low voice, "you have us. You have the Marauders. And we'll never leave you. Marauders together. Marauders forever. I solemnly swear.."

"..That I am up to no good," finished Sirius, a wry smile creeping upon his lips for the first time in too long. It was an oath the four had coined at the end of last year, and it had stuck as their motto. "Thanks, James."

"That's what Marauders are for," was the response.

–

"MUM!"

"DAD!"

"HOUSE ELF!"

"Bye Peter! See you here in January! Happy Christmas! Happy New Year!"

"Bye Peter! See you here in January! Happy Christmas! Happy New Year! Send me a gift! Write or I'll murder you!"

"Bye, guys!"

"Come on, Sirius, there's my mum," said James excitedly after Peter left with his parents, taking Sirius by the arm and dragging him away.

"Why is he dragging me?" Sirius asked no one in particular. "Who gave this boy authorization to drag me?"

"You're starting to sound like Moony, mate."

"Oh, wow."

"Mum! Dad!"

"_James!"_

"Mr and Mrs Potter!"

"Sirius!_"_

"Mum, Dad, you remember my friend Sirius B – _ow – _" For Sirius had kicked James in the ankle. Hard. "My. Friend. Sirius. Just. Sirius."

"Yes," said Sirius. "Just. Sirius. So how bout 'em Chuddley Cannons?"

This led to a rather heated discussion, as Sirius, for some absurd reason, was a firm supporter, whereas James and his dad were obsessed with the Tutshill Tornadoes, and, somehow, James's mum loved the Irish Quidditch Team.

The conversation became so enrapturing that Sirius could think of little else – for example, that he was standing in Kings' Cross, waiting for his mum to come pick him up.

A cold hand sat on his shoulder as he was happily picking through every flaw the Tutshill Tornadoes had. He stopped and went very still.

He closed his eyes briefly, then turned around, mind racing with possible ways to get out of this predicament. Mr and Mrs Potter would know that his mother was Walburga Black, that he was a Black, that his family was a well known supporter of pure bloodness, of Voldemort, of _evil – _they would know, they would tell James to stop associating with him, James would have to listen, and even if they didn't then Sirius's mum would surely _force _him to stop associating with him, send him to Durmstrang or something...

"Hello, Mum," he said evenly. "Glad to see you."

"The feeling isn't mutual," said Sirius's mother coldly. "Come along. And who are these?"

Sirius swore mentally. This was it.

"This is my friend, Mum," said Sirius cautiously. "James Potter. And these are his parents. Um, this is my mother."

For an endless moment, Annie Potter's eyes met with the one's of Walburga Black's, and for an endless moment, the smile on Mrs. Potter's face melted off for what seemed like the first time.

Sirius's mum glared down at Sirius. "You told me you had stopped associating with these – people," she snapped.

"Well, I lied," said Sirius meekly.

James's mum looked down at Sirius. "Sirius," she said. "A Black, are you?"

"Yes ma'am," said Sirius nervously.

"Sirius _Black,_" repeated Mr. Potter.

"Yes sir," said Sirius nervously.

For another endless moment, they both only looked at him. James crept slightly closer to his friend and touched his wrist.

Mrs. Potter's face broke into a smile. "Long time no see, Walburga," she said evenly. "I haven't seen you since you were a first year. I've heard of you, though. You've made out for yourself quite well, haven't you? You have a lovely boy. Sirius is just charming. You must be very proud."

Mrs. Black's mouth had grown into a very thin line. "I wouldn't agree," she said coldly. "And no. I am not proud."

Mrs. Potter blinked. "Excuse me?"

"If my – son – ," said Mrs. Black, distaste evident in her voice, "has been reduced to associating with people such as you, I am certainly not proud of him in the slightest."

"And what do you mean by that?" said Annie.

"I mean that you are filth," shot back Walburga.

James's hand flew to his wand pocket. Sirius groaned quietly and hid his face in hands.

Mrs. Potter touched James's arm – and, to shock of everyone around – Sirius's. She looked at Mrs. Black, smile not fading.

"Thank you," she said simply. "Coming from you, Walburga, that's a compliment of the highest order."

Mrs. Black blinked. "What – what – ?" she spluttered.

Mrs. Potter had a small smile on her face. Both James and Sirius were grinning. "Sirius," she said, "you must come for the summer break. We'll be in touch."

"Definitely," said James sincerely, and Sirius felt the great joy of relief sweep through him, and as he and his mother left the station, his mother yelling at him the entire time, he couldn't stop smiling.

* * *

**A/N: asfghjitjkehrfhothyoeohry...**

**My brain is fried. FRIED. Stupid midterms, and quarterly exams, and omigod MY BRAIN IS FRIED. :/ Today is a SNOW DAY, which is good and bad because WE GET A DAY OFF OF SPRING BREAK x( x( x( x( Sigh. Oh well, at least I had time to put this up! Joy. **

**So, who enjoyed Walburga getting what was coming to her? I enjoyed writing it, honestly. :P So, review, and then go read potterride's story, 'cause I gave her a prompt that included Andromeda and iguanas. Thanks!  
**


	37. When It Gets Cold

Chapter Thirty Six

When It Gets Cold

Remus had thought he'd enjoy the Christmas holidays at Hogwarts. He had them planned out in his head and everything. He'd spend long, lazy hours in the library, rereading his favorites from the Muggle section, finishing _Hogwarts, A History _for the seventeenth time, talking to Andromeda (who Sirius had hinted was going to stay in school for the break), maybe going outside and enjoying the snow...the possibilities seemed endless.

It didn't work out that way.

He was lonely.

Being lonely was definitely not a foreign experience. From age six to eleven, he _had _been alone. But he'd always had his parents, his home, a plethora of pets.

He had never, Remus reflected as he trudged through the cold halls of Hogwarts, heading back to his dorm after a cold and lonely dinner, been _entirely _alone.

And so, there was only one thing to do, of course.

He had to pull a prank.

Remus stopped in his tracks as the thought struck him. He rubbed his head. "I'm insane," he said aloud. "_Insane._"

He continued to walk, mentally arguing with himself.

___You're Remus Lupin. You don't pull pranks._

_ But I'm a Marauder!_

_ You're only a Marauder if there's other Marauders there!_

___But think about how impressed they'll be! And it'll be __fun!_

___ Think of how impressed __McGonagall ____will be – that is to say – NOT impressed!_

_ But it'll be FUN!_

_ But your reputation – _

_ What if I don't get caught?_

_ What if you do?_

_ But I won't._

_ You will._

_ I won't._

_ You will._

_ I won't._

_ How can you be so sure?_

_ I'll..consult an expert._

_ Your friends?_

_ Yes. I'm-doing-this!_

_ What's with the fast thinking?_

_ I'M—DOING—THIS! Now shut up, conscience ._

Acknowledging dimly that he was out of his mind, he picked up speed. When he finally reached his sadly empty dorm, he snatched the nearest quill and found a sheaf of parchment, then began writing rapidly. He decided that sending a letter to Sirius would not be clever, so instead he addressed it to James.

_ Dear James,_

_ Being in solitude for such an extended period has aggrieved my mind, and I have gone insane. Will you help me play a caper on the general population of Hogwarts?_

_ Yours in fellowship,_

_ R.J Lupin_

He scrawled his signature with a flourish, then hurried off to the Owlery to mail it.

–

___ Dear R.J Lupin,_

_ That letter had too many big words in it._

_ -J.H Potter_

___PS: What the heck does "yours in fellowship" mean?_

_ Dear James,_

_ I have been cursed with friends who are idiots._

_ Let me spell it out for you._

_ Will_

_ you_

_ help_

_ me_

_ play  
a_

_ prank  
on_

_ the_

_ rest _

_ of _

_ the _

_ school?_

_ From,_

_ R_

_ Dear R,_

_ I'VE NEVER BEEN SO PROUD!_

_ I'm sitting here crying my eyes out. Oh, Moony, Moony, Moony, I'm so proud!_

_ Remus Lupin – YOU HAVE BECOME A MARAUDER._

_ -A Very Proud James Potter_

_ Dear Idiot,_

_ Shut up. Just give me an idea._

_ -Not Moony_

_ Dear Not Moony,_

_ Okay, okay. Why don't you do what we did to RIP Ben? Fireworks, saying Merry Christmas?_

_ -Idiot_

_ Dear Annoying Boy,_

_ Overused._

_ -Going Crazy_

_ Going Crazy,_

_ Okay...hmm...OO!_

_ I HAVE SUCH A GREAT IDEA!_

_ I've written it down! Check inside the eye of the statue of the One Eyed Witch!_

_WRITE ME THE RESULTS!_

_ -Genius_

_ James,_

_ Okay. That really is really, really, really good. Wasn't it on our list last year, though?_

_ -Remus_

_ Moony,_

_ Yeah..._

_ SO?_

_ -James _

_ James,_

_ I'll write you the results!_

_ -Remus_

–

Christmas day, Minerva McGonagall woke up with a strange sense of foreboding.

She wasn't sure, exactly, why, but faint, haunting memories of last year with Potter, Lupin, Pettigrew and Black, and snow, and antidisestablishmentarianism, and Australia..

But Potter, Black, and Pettigrew had gone home for the holidays. Only Lupin was remaining, and he was a good boy when not influenced by his friends.

Feeling slightly soothed, but still with an air of worry, she pulled on the ludicrous robe she wore only on Christmas, given to her by Professor Dumbledore himself years and years ago. It was bright lime green, not even Christmas green, spotted with red Christmas trees.

"Albus Dumbledore – the most insane genius of the century," she muttered before delving into the small, neat stack of presents on her bedside.

She emerged from them much happier. Lily Evans, one of her best students – not, of course, that she _played favorites _– had given her an absolutely beautiful eagle feathered quill that wrote like a dream, exactly what she had wanted. Albus had gotten her another robe, but thank goodness one much more her style, in a lovely brown tartan color. To her sheer delight, Professor Flitwick, one of her best friends, had gotten her a gigantic box of chocolate with a note that read: _for when the students get too crazy and no one's watching. _From Hagrid, she got a tooth breaking fudge cake, which she decided to use as a decoration.

Her final present was a very mysterious one. It was a locket, probably costing no little amount of money, and no one seemed to have given it to her, as it was unsigned. Dangling from it was a tiny star.

She carefully opened the locket. Wedged tightly inside was an absolutely tiny piece of paper. She removed it, curious.

_ Probably just a scrap or a tag.._

Nonetheless, she began to unfold. Once, twice, three times, four times, five, six, seven, eight..

She'd read in a book, when she was very small, that a piece of paper could only be folded seven times.

Well, it must've been a Muggle book, she decided as she unfolded the thirty eighth fold.

About twelve folds later, she finally had a flat, extremely creased piece of paper in front of her. Two words, written in tiny handwriting, were in the very center, and they increased her foreboding by about a hundred and seventy percent.

_ I'm sorry._

–

_From the journal of Minerva McGonagall:_

_25/12 – 2:30 PM_

_Oh dear Lord in heaven._

_Stars._

_25/12 – 3:00 PM_

_Stars stars stars stars._

_25/12 – 7:00 PM_

_THE CEILING._

_Oh my God oh my God oh my God oh my God._

_25/12 – 8:00 PM_

_SOMEONE TOOK ALL THE STARS FROM THE GREAT HALL CEILING AND PLASTERED THEM ALL OVER THE SCHOOL._

_How.._

_how.._

_when.._

_I need therapy._

–

_ Dear James,_

_ Oh my God it was AWESOME!_

_It was a simple _Uwrapinao _charm last night to get all the stars off the Great Hall ceiling and an even simpler charm to have no one notice. I plastered the stars all around the school at 3 am, and of course I Disillusioned myself first – basically, it all worked out perfectly! You should've seen McGonagall's face. I haven't taken the stars down quite yet..I'm thinking about holding off till the end of break?_

_ -Remus_

_ The New Pranking King,_

_ You're a miracle worker. We should all strive to follow in your footsteps._

_Definitely hold off, but not quite till the end of break. It get's old, kind of blends in with the rest of the school. Plus the Great Hall ceiling will look empty without its stars. Maybe two more days? And take pictures! Lots!_

_ Yours,_

_ James_

_ PS: How'd Dumbledore take this?  
PPS: I mailed Peter. He thinks you're amazing._

_ James,_

_ Dumbledore just sat there with this amused little smile on his face. I'm so very proud of myself..._

_ Oh my God, what have you three made me into?_

_ Anyways, two days passed, and I've taken the stars down. No one knows who did it, but everyone, everyone _everyone _is talking about it – even Xenophilius Lovegood. He's convinced it's Nargles, whatever they are.. You know, that really strange third year whose father edits the _Quibbler _and who completely keeps to himself and all that. I think Snape suspects though – he kept giving me these smirks. But what the heck, he's got no proof._

_ Merry Christmas!_

_ -Remus_

_ PS: How do you think Sirius is faring?_

_ Dear Remus,_

_ I am SO proud!_

_ I don't think very well. Not very well at all.._

_ -James_

_

* * *

_**Well haii.**

**This is awkward..**

**Yeah, yeah, it's been a month, I suck, I even left it at a cliffhanger, BLAH THE HECK BLAH. This is the last of the fluffiness you will get for a LONG TIME, GUYS. Sort of. Right now, I'm writing a chapter of this VERY STORY WHERE -drumroll- someone..d- (clamps hand over mouth) nothing! It's all sunshiney and rainbowy..**

**Anyways. I have a very good explanation! My computer DIED. But my best friend was pestering me so much I'm like, let me just get the stupid unedited version from my email and edit it best I can, sigh, sigh, sigh, OH MY LIFE. So basically you guys are lucky to have a chapter at all. :) The next one won't be up for ages, because I _do_ have it in my email, but it is a mess of a first draft. Like, really. It is _all over the place. _Believe me, you don't want to face it. At all. Imma have to send my computer away to get it fixed, and if it can't be (o horror of horrors)..well, there's some hardrive thingamij and as long as it's intact I have all my files saved, but STILL. It will take an obscene amount of time. Computers suck. Who invented the word? Maybe a guy named Jimmy. I wonder if Jimmy liked _Twilight_. Or maybe his name was Dan B. and he hated _Twilight _like a sensible human being. Hmm..WE WILL ALWAYS WONDER. How suckish.**

**Ohhh well. Hope you enjoyed, no favoriting/alerting without reviewing, and PLEASE do so! (Review, I mean, not..oh, forget it.)  
**

**All the best, **

**BWX**

**PS: Do we have any Maximum Ride lovers reading? Yeah. If so (ANGEL SPOILER ALERT AHEAD) didn't _Angel_ suck so evilly that it's not even funny? STUPID MAX HOW COULD YOU GO WITH DYLAN .  
**


	38. And It Feels Like the End

Chapter Thirty Eight

And It Feels Like the End

Although Sirius Black could not stop smiling on the way out of the station, by the time Christmas rolled around, the smile seemed to be thrown onto the ground and crumpled up so thoroughly it was rather difficult to find it.

While Remus was fully enjoying the aftereffects of his prank and a delicious Hogwarts dinner, James was playing Quidditch with a couple of his cousins, and Peter was unwrapping presents with his parents and playing with his baby sister, Sirius was at 12 Grimmauld Place, quite possibly one of the worst places to spend Christmas, with the people who were definitely the worst people to spend Christmas with: his family.

As was traditional, Kreacher prepared an enormous and delicious meal. Aunt Druscilla and Uncle Cygnus were invited, as well as Narcissa and Bellatrix. Sirius's blood boiled with anger at the thought that Andromeda's chair would be empty for the first time in ages, as long as he could possibly remember and probably before that.

At ten of seven on December 25th, Sirius was sprawled across his bed, staring blankly at a book that James had sent him for a gift, entitled _The Chuddley Cannons – Defeats, Losses, and Everything You'd Want to Know, and Some Things You Wouldn't. _It was a very good book, and he was perfectly happy to spend all of Christmas up there.

His plans were foiled.

"Sirius?" Regulus peered into his room. "You have to come down now."

Sirius sighed. "Who says?"

"Mum, Dad, and Kreacher."

Sirius heaved a sigh.

"And you have to put on your good dress robes."

Sirius groaned. "_Reeeegggiee..._"

Regulus groaned. "_Siriii.._"

They both sighed.

"Might as well get on with it," said Sirius. He trudged to his closet, put on his best robes, and he and Regulus began walking downstairs to a Dinner of Torture.

–

Sirius was seated at one end of the table, next to his mother and in front of a huge platter of cooked fish. Regulus was seated on the other end, next to his father and in front of a huge platter of chicken.

"Life," muttered Sirius, poking holes in his creamy mashed potatoes, "is not good."

For a few hours, Sirius's parents, aunt, and uncle, while Sirius stabbed at his food, fuming, Regulus fidgeted, and Bellatrix and Narcissa murmured to each other. It was a deeply boring stage in the life of Sirius Orion Black.  
The food was good, though.

At about ten o'clock, when a considerable amount of food and wine had been consumed, the conversation turned to – of course – Sirius.

"Regulus is turning out to be a fine boy, Wally," said Aunt Druscilla, setting down a mug of wine. "Yes, a very fine boy indeed...going to be a Slytherin, surely?" She turned sharply to Regulus. "Am I correct?"

"Y-yes, Aunty," squeaked Regulus. Sirius shot him a glare. Regulus gave him an apologetic look.

"Regulus is my heart's apple," announced Sirius's mum, hiccuping. "Now, my _other _son.." She sent a sharp look at Sirius, who clenched his fists and resisted the urge to upturn his water glass on his mother.

"Sirius is quite a disappointment to us," said Orion coolly, and Sirius was temporarily shocked into silence. His father _never _spoke.

"That's a bit of an understatement," boasted Walburga. "Sirius is a horrible, ungrateful little ingrate who dared to desert his family and be Sorted into Gryffindor. And _do _you know who Sirius has been associating with?"

Rage was building in Sirius. He clenched his hands tighter. _She's only trying to wind you up, _said a voice in his head that sounded remarkably like James. _Don't take the bait. _

"Who?" asked Aunt Druscilla in a hushed voice.

Sirius's mum looked around impressively at the table for a moment, eyes lingering on Sirius, taking relish in her son's pain the way a mother never, ever should, and finally said, in a voice as if she was uttering a loathed insect – "_The Potters._"

There was a dead silence at first. Then, as if rehearsed, Narcissa uttered a loud, dramatic gasp. "The _Potters! _The biggest family of blood traitors since – since – why, they _are _the biggest family of blood traitors!"

_Come, Andromeda, _Sirius found himself begging. _Come save me._

"Yes," said Walburga solemnly. "I cannot express how depressed I am.."

_Come, James. Come, Remus. Come, Peter. Save me. From this madness._

But, of course, it was wishful thinking. No sooner would James, Remus, and Peter come through the door would they be killed, probably. Sirius wouldn't put it past anyone sitting at the table, except possibly Reg.

"Ridiculous," proclaimed Bellatrix. "And, although many do not know this..I happened to be speaking to Slughorn last year and he told me some most curious things.."

The glint in Bellatrix's eye made Sirius feel extremely uneasy. "Bella.." he croaked.

"Oh yes, very curious," went on Bellatrix, as if Sirius had not spoken. "Something concerning you, in fact, Sirius..something you happened to mention to Horace Slughorn around Christmas of last year.."

Sirius thought hard back to last year. Then it hit him.

_Are you going home, my lad?  
Hogwarts is my home. 12 Grimmauld isn't and never will be._

"Bellatrix – "said Sirius desperately, "Bellatrix, please – "

"And Slughorn told me a most _funny _thing," said Bellatrix loudly. "He told me that Sirius told him that – "

"_Bellatrix!"_

"That 12 Grimmauld Place – his home, of course – "

"BELLA! PLEASE!"

"Go on, Bellatrix," said Walburga in a deadly quiet tone of voice.

Bellatrix smiled. "Sirius, apparently, said that 12 Grimmauld Place was not his home, that it never would be, and that Hogwarts was his true home."

Sirius closed his eyes.

"Is this true?" asked Sirius's mum in the same horrible quiet voice. "Did you bring even more shame to the House of Black by telling people that you were unhappy at home?"

Sirius remained silent, his friends' voices echoing in his heads, but he couldn't make out what were saying.

"Sirius..Orion..Black. Answer me."

_When she calls you Orion, it doesn't matter, because you're not Sirius Orion Black to us. To us, you're Sirius, the idiot Marauder._

_ "_Yes, Mother dearest, I did. And that was because I was taught, not by you, but by the people I care about, the people who care for me, that lying was wrong." He paused. "Unless we're talking about pranks here. Or homework excuses. Those don't count."

There were ten seconds of silence, and then..

The next few minutes passed in quite a bit of chaos and no one, not even those who, like me, have dedicated themselves to finding out as much about the Marauders as possible and making up what they can't figure out, has been able to work out exactly what went on. There was a considerable amount of yelling from either side of the dinner table, much use of the words _blood traitor, mudblood, hate, get out, now, _and it ultimately ended...

..with a very large, smelly, not all the way cooked, slimy, cold, fish slapped against Bellatrix Dracina Black's face.

There was another silence, but this one was more shocked than anything else, and it was much longer.

Sirius held the only uncooked fish from the basket in his hand, trembling from head to foot. Practically semi-consciously, he began jotting off a will in his mind.

_My socks will all go to Peter, my pranks will all go to James, my books will all go to Moony, the Animgus research I've done so far will also go to James, my room will go to Reggie..._

_ I'm going to DIE._

_ Well, at least I got to slap Bellatrix with a fish. _

For a quarter of second, he let his focus on Bellatrix. She had a wet spot sprawled all the way across her face, and looked absolutely horrified.

_I'll die happy, I think._

Walburga Black's face was growing redder and redder, a genuine fury building up before her eyes. But not nearly as furious as the fury in Bellatrix's eyes. And the way she held her wand.

_That is not gonna be worth what's coming._

_All right. Maybe a little._

_

* * *

_**A/N: Woo, I'm back! And this includes fish-slapping! :D**_  
_


	39. Well, I Won't Give In

Chapter Thirty Nine

Well, I Won't Give In

"Finally, finally, _finally!" _exclaimed Peter, bursting through the platform, followed by his mother, who was holding seven month old Anastasia tightly.

"Dow," ordered Anastasia. Smiling, Matilda Pettigrew brushed a lock of hair out of her daughter's eyes before setting the child on the ground. Anastasia looked around curiously.

"We're at Kings' Cross, baby," explained Mrs. Pettigrew. "Your big brother Peter is going away for a little while."

Anastasia toddled uncertainly towards her older brother and threw her arms around his legs.

"Peehtah go?" she asked. "Go way?"

Peter smiled and hugged his sister. "Peehtah go," he said solemnly. "But I'll be back. I promise."

"Peetah back," agreed Anastasia.

"Yes," agreed Peter. "Peetah back."

"_Peter! Over here!"_

"Mum! Mum, that's Sirius Black! I gotta go meet up with him! I love you, Mum, Anastasia, I'll see you in June!"

"Oh, Peter," began Matilda tearily.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," said Peter, hugging his mother and his little sister.

"Good luck, sweetheart. No T's, okay?"

"_Mum. _We don't get T's until 5th year."

"No failing then, understood? Take care, dear. I love you."

"I love you, Mum."

–

A few minutes and goodbyes later, Sirius, James and Peter had packed themselves into a compartment, loaded themselves with sweets they'd agreed beforehand to sneak from home, and were talking and laughing and getting on as if they hadn't been separated at all. The train ride passed uneventfully, and much joy was experienced when they got off and discovered it was in fact snowing.

The best part of the evening, of course, was meeting Remus, who had sneaked all the way down to the train station in ways he refused to share so he and his friends could go in the carriages together, which caused James to boast about how happy he was about how Marauderly Remus had, which caused Remus to punch him. They had a very happy reunion, then loaded into a carriage they had to themselves.

"So, Remus," said Sirius, putting his feet up on James's knees, "do tell us about this apparently wicked prank you pulled?"

"Yeah, I only know the bare bones," agreed Peter.

"I know it," said James, shoving Sirius's boots off of his pants, "but I want to hear the whole story again. It will go down in history. Do tell, Moony."

"All right," said Remus, grinning in a very unRemusish way. "It was _brilliant, _I have to say.." And he explained, in all the detail in the world, the spells he had used and the reactions he had earned and the little folded up piece of paper he'd slipped to McGonagall. Sirius and Peter were howling by the end of it, and James was grinning.

"Mate, you are much more brilliant than we give you credit for," announced Sirius.

The journey passed in such terms, discussing pranks to pull and whether or not it would be appropriate to turn Dumbledore's beard into a mouse. At one point in the journey, Sirius and James got into a minor scuffle, each of them laughing and trying to oneup one another, until James punched Sirius in his right arm.

For a moment, Sirius froze, a look of perpetual surprise overtaking his face, then he fell back into his seat, teeth clenched, clutching his arm.

"Sirius!" James exclaimed, worry and guilt shooting through him. "What – ?"

"'Mfine," Sirius grunted, obviously fighting tooth and nail from crying out, but forcing a smile nonetheless.

"No, you're not," said Remus, having years of experience hiding wounds. "Show me your arm."

"No."

"SIRIUS. Show me your arm NOW."

"I'm _fine._"

"No, you're _not. _Show it to me!"

"I'm – _fine, _Remus! Leave me alone! It's just a weird little spot I have, okay?"

"No it isn't," said Remus in a very no-nonsense voice. "It is obviously something else, now show me."

"No."

So of course Remus had to go over and force Sirius's sleeve up. When he did, he gasped out loud. James and Peter scrambled over. Peter winced and James swore.

Sirius's arm had obviously been broken and very clumsily set. It was very swollen, and although it no longer looked completely _snapped, _it looked very, very painful.

"I'm stronger than I look," croaked James.

"It's not _you,_" said Remus, unable to tear his eyes from Sirius's arm. Sirius himself had seemed to have given up, and he had slumped in his seat, allowing Remus to examine the wound. "Sirius, what _happened?"_

"I slapped Bellatrix with a fish," Sirius managed to say. "She took offense."

"You _slapped _her with a _fish?" _said James, just as Remus said, "And she _broke _your _arm?_"

"No," said Sirius. "She threw a hex at me that give the sensation of something very, very heavy hitting my arm. And apparently it was not just a sensation." He grinned weakly. "I had Kreacher do some healing on it. Obviously he's not very good at it. Or maybe did a shoddy job to annoy me. Git. But I'm fine. This'll be – this'll be better in a few days."

"If by better, you mean you'll probably have either lost the use of your arm forever or have died from pain or something, then yeah, it'll be fine," said Remus through clenched teeth. "Sirius, you _idiot. _Why didn't you tell us this before?"

Sirius closed his eyes. "I couldn't," he said through equally clenched teeth. "You don't just go up to your friends and ask if they'll Heal your arm!"

"Well you _should! _How did we not notice, anyways?_"_

_ "_I just didn't use this arm, that's all – there was no _point _telling you!"

"Yes there _was!"_

"Can you even fix this, though?" he demanded.

"As a matter of fact," said Remus, "no, I can't, you'll have to go to the matron."

"Pomfrey!" A look of horror crossed Sirius's face. "_No!"_

"Sirius!" exploded Remus. "Don't be STUPID!"

"What if she asks what happened?" he hissed. "What if she finds out? She'll come down on Bellatrix like a lion and then I'll have brought more "shame to the Black family blah blah blah" and then they'll do a lot worse than what they do and Bellatrix will do too much more than hitting me with a hex, all right, and nine times out of ten _I'm not in the mood!_"

There was a silence.

"Okay," said Remus in a voice of forced calm. "Okay. All right. I can see where you're coming from. But Sirius—"

"It's giving in, if I heal it," Sirius cut in. "Giving in, agreeing that they hurt me. And I will never do that." He crossed his arms defiantly.

Remus resisted the urge to slap his friend. "It's giving in even MORE," he growled, "if you _don't _get help! Get it through your head, Sirius, you _need _to Heal this! Are you going to give in? Are you going to _let _them hurt you?"

Sirius sighed, suddenly looking rather world-weary. "Well, even if I could, I couldn't," he said quietly. "None of us can Heal, can we?"

"Hang on," said James abruptly. "There is a simple solution to this."

"And what's that?" demanded Remus.

"Easy," said Peter, surprising nearly everyone. "Muggle remedies. Right, James?"

"Yeah," said James. "Wraps, casts, slings, things of the sort. Much more difficult than actual healing, but it does do the job."

"Do any of you have any idea _how _to apply anything of the sort, though?" demanded Remus.

"I do," said Peter in a small voice.

Twelve eyes fell on the small, fair haired boy. "How the _h – _" began Sirius, but Peter cut him off.

"Mum is a Muggle nurse," explained Peter. "And they thought I was a Squib at one point...this was when I was ten or so...so she taught me how to wrap a cast...and..yeah. So I can do that. Or I could, if I had some gauze."

Remus smiled triumphantly and waved his bag triumphantly. He opened it and about twelve books fell out. He only pulled out more, setting them carefully on the ground, before finally pulling a hunk of gauze.

"How the heck did you get your hands on _that?"_asked James, looking disapproving as he stared at the books.

"Don't leave home without it," said Remus wryly, stroking one of the scars across his face. "Here, Peter."

With some difficulty, a cast of sorts was wrapped around Sirius's arms. He was examining it. "How does this help?" he asked, sounding deeply impressed.

"It keeps the bones in place, which keeps them set, which eventually allows them to grow back," explained Peter. "It's quite slow – much slower that magical methods – but Muggles always manage to be completely healed afterward, with no side effects."

"Amazing," remarked James.

"I've used it," said Remus, "when I was younger and we were on vacation and I had a full moon and I broke my leg and we didn't have St. Mungos available, we went to the Muggle hospital and they fixed it. I had to wear it for _ages, _but my leg is fine." He kicked James in the knee to demonstrate, who promptly kicked him back.

A thought floated unheeded to James. Ever since they'd "discovered" the truth about Remus, he'd been somewhat more comfortable about referencing it, at least around them. It was a subtle change, but a good one.

"You'll have to wear it for about eight weeks, I guess," wagered Peter. "But yeah. It works."

Sirius stared, impressed, at the cast. "Thanks, you guys," he said quietly.

"It's nothing," mumbled Peter, going slightly red.

There was an odd silence.

"Why IS it with the odd silences lately?" shouted James, waving his hands around wildly. "Come on, guys. Pranks. Hey, you know that slimy git, Snivellus? I don't like him."

"Yeah, because he's Evans's boyfriend," Sirius whispered loudly. James threw a quill at him.

"That," said Remus, offended, "is _my _job." And the rest of the carriage ride passed..

in an ink-and-quill-throwing fight.

_Ah, to be a Marauder, _thought Peter happily as he hit Remus with violet ink.

* * *

**BONJOUR PEEPS! :D I hope you've had a good week. Wanna know a way to make mine even better? Review, that's what. ALSO. Please, please, _please _go on this: **http:/ www fanfiction net / s / 6829860 / 1 / The _ War _ to _ End _ All _ Wars. **Just remove the space and add dots between www, fanfiction, and net. It's a humorfic that potterride and I wrote together. Please read and review! Thanks! **


	40. Quidditch

Chapter Forty

Quidditch

"Hey, Sirius," said Remus, looking over a thick book a day in mid February in the common room, "please don't mind if I ask, but why are you staring at Lily Evans as if your life depends on it?"

James dropped all his books on Peter's head. "WHAT is he doing?" he yelped.

"I am _not,_" Sirius assured his friend. "And why do you care anyway?"

James went very red. "Absolutely no reason," he said reasonably. "I just think it's rude to look at a girl for extended periods of time."

"I am NOT," explained Sirius. "I am trying to look at the Gryffindor bulletin board, but Lily Evans just happens to be standing in front of it."

"That's what they all say," piped up Peter, an uncharacteristically wicked grin on his face.

"Shut up," said Sirius, going red. "I am going to _walk over there and look at the bulletin board _if it makes you all feel better."

"Get a better look at Evans," quipped Remus, causing Sirius to whack him over the head with a very heavy Transfiguration book, causing Remus to fall painfully to the ground with a very loud _thunk, _causing Sirius to think he had accidentally reignited on of Remus's werewolf scars or broken his brain or something else dire, a feat he was quite worried about ever since James had punched the broken arm that was now entirely healed, causing Sirius to kneel desperately on the ground and demand if Remus was okay, causing Remus to sock Sirius in the nose and say that yes it hurt very much, causing Sirius extreme relief that Remus was okay, causing James to yell, "STOP THE MADNESS AND GO OVER THERE ALREADY," causing Sirius to stop the madness and go over there already.

He came back almost skipping a few seconds later. "Yes, yes, _YES,_" he sang. "The rumours were true. There are TWO OPENINGS ON THE GRYFFINDOR QUIDDITCH TEAM! Tryouts are next month!" He and James slapped five.

"Why two?" asked Peter. "I mean..Ben..and..who else?"

"That Amanda Lo girl, I think she was injured a bit too much..she's given up," said Remus absently. He'd reopened his book and was deeply immersed in it. "She was a Chaser, wasn't she?"

"YES!" shouted James, leaping several inches into the air. "Yes, yes, _yeeeeeees! _That's _exactly _what I wanted!"

"And Ben was a Beater," said Sirius joyfully. "Oh, yes yes yes YES."

"You two do realize," said Remus sensibly, "that the team may not be looking for second years."

"I've been playing Quidditch since I was _two, _Moo_ny,_" said James witheringly.

"Me too," said Sirius. "And I taught Regulus when he was _one._"

"Now that's just impossible," yawned Remus.

"Your face is impossible."

"_You're _impossible."

James opened a book and settled into an armchair. This would take awhile.

–

"Upppppp and eeeeeeeeeearlyyyyyy!"

"It's five in the morning, James Potter, and I swear if I hear _ONE MORE WORD _out of you I will CURSE YOU UNTIL YOUR FINGERNAILS TURN GREEN."

"You sound like Sirius's cousins, Moony."

"Wow, really? Do YOU WAKE THEM UP THIS EARLY? CAUSE IF YOU DO, I REALLY CAN'T BLAME THEM!"

"Chill, Moons."

"MY NAME IS REMUS."

"No, it's not, it's Moony. Moony Lupin. Get with the program."

"JAMES POTTER, I'M GOING TO MURDER, MURDER, _MURDER _YOU!"

"James, I'm guessing you're not in here just to torture Moony, and no, I'm not playing Quidditch with you. It's five a.m."

"...And your point, Sirius?"

"JAMES _HENRY _POTTER! GO TO SLEEP THIS INSTANT OR I SHALL – I SHALL – "

"_Snorous."_

_..Snnnooreee..._

"Nice one, James."

"Thank you, Sirius."

"No problem."

"Cool."

"I'm still not practicing Quidditch."

"Please?"

"No."

"Puhhhleeeeeeseee?"

"NO."

"_Pretty _please? With icicles on top?"

"_...Snorous._"

_...Snoorrrrrrrreeee..._

"Never should have taught me that one! Ha!"

–

Disregarding that mad morning, James and Sirius took to playing Quidditch almost every second of the day. As soon as lessons ended, they'd be out on the field, practicing Chasing and Beating. Although they could ever, ever drag Remus along with them (he was oddly adverse to Quidditch, although he had signed up to be commentator) they often convinced Peter to Keep or Beat as an opposition for them. As tryouts grew nearer, James _did _manage to persuade Sirius to come out with him early as five or six, and they sneaked out after curfew once or twice. It was only when McGonagall (and Remus) discovered them skipping Transfiguration that they caught heat.

" – YOU BRING SHAME TO THE GRYFFINDOR HOUSE, BY ALL RIGHTS YOU SHOULD BE DISQUALIFIED FROM PARTICIPATING IN TRYOUTS – "

"I'M GOING TO _MURDER _YOU TWO! _MURDER _YOU TWO! AND YOU CANNOT COPY ANYONE'S NOTES!"

...The latter was McGonagall.

In the end, after promising to serve several weeks of detention and having almost a hundred points in total taken, James and Sirius were allowed to both copy Remus's notes and try out for the team, under the promise that they would never, ever, _ever _skip class again.

(As later years would soon explain, they did not keep their promise.)

"Eat," ordered Remus. "Now."

It was eight o'clock on a very special Saturday morning. Tryouts for the Gryffindor Quidditch team were being held that Saturday.

"I'm not hungry," said James, picking at his plate.

"Me neither," said Sirius, chewing on his fingernail.

"Well, we know that pigs can fly now," said Remus dryly. "But seriously. If you don't eat, you will become weak, and then when you get on your brooms for tryouts today, you will fall off and go BANG on the ground and break all your bones and die horrible, painful deaths and then you will MISS THE TRANSFIGURATION TEST."

James and Sirius both looked mildly disturbed, but each managed to down a piece of toast, and Sirius even choked down a fried egg.

"Oh, God, it's time," moaned James. He'd spotted the captain, Frank Longbottom, stand up and signal significantly to the rest of his team. "What time is it, Moony?"

Remus consulted his pocket watch. It was somewhat dented but in remarkably good condition, made of pure silver. His father had given to him – passed down from about three generations – the past Christmas. "Nine thirty."

"Already?" said Sirius nervously. He pushed aside his breakfast. "C'mon James..oh, oh, we're _not _going to make it, we're going to mess up so badly.."

Remus decided it was time for some hardcore pep talk. "All right, you guys," he sighed, laying his fork on the table. "You guys have been preparing for this all month. You have worked your hands knobby, your knuckles skinned, and your legs off, for crying out loud you've skived off lessons to practice. You know things about Quidditch that Frank Longbottom has yet to figure out – heck, things that the guy who _invented _Quidditch has to figure out. You guys have played your entire lives, and you've driven me crazy for it, and _there_ _is no one out on that field who's an eight of an inch better than you!" _He banged his fist on the table for emphasis.

There was a short silence. "Thanks, Moony," said James after a moment.

"Seriously," agreed Sirius.

"Go out there and cream them," said Peter, speaking for the first time.

The four Marauders smiled.

–

James and Sirius returned to the common room at six o'clock that evening, dirty, sweating, and radiating a strange aura of joy. Remus and Peter hadn't been able to watch the tryouts – weighed down with homework – and had been waiting anxiously all day.

"We made the team," said James brightly.

* * *

**...Well, wouldya look at that! I'm alive!**

**This is all filler stuff, we're gonna get to a major point this summer, which is (forgive me) coming up quickly..yeah, this year was short, but at least I actually got in some plot in this one,,  
**

**Just a warning: it's all rather happy-go-lucky right now, but come summer, it will be incredibly sad. Mwahahahhh. Yes, more person(s) will die. Voldie's rising, guys! I have no idea why I'm so excited about that.**

**So essentially, we're gonna have a bit more Quidditch, and then summer! And then sadness. And Andromeda will make an epic return and it will be epic!  
**

**Reviieww..  
**


	41. The First Match

Chapter Forty One

The First Game

The first game of the season was in March, Gryffindor versus Slytherin. Remus had signed up to be commentator, and, predictably enough, James and Sirius were epically freaking out.

"You guys will do _fine,_" said Remus wearily. It was four a.m the night before the match, and James and Sirius were huddled across a diagram of the Quidditch field, muttering to each other and moving red and green pieces across the board. "You need _sleep._"

"And if Avery swoops around from the back, James, then you curve ahead and intercept, and I'll hit a Bludger at Mulciber, and the take the Quaffle – "

"Wait, no, no, _no, _if Avery comes from the back then I'll go from _around _and throw him off track, then you throw a Bludger at Goldburgle and _I'll _grab the Quaffle and pass to Taileon – "

"But what if Taileon gets hit like _that?"_

"Then you move to D9."

"But D9 is occupied by Trevor."

Remus covered his head with a pillow.

–

"Eat something, guys, _please,_" begged Remus, shoving plates of the most delectable dishes imaginable under his friends' noses.

"No," said James and Sirius at once.

Remus sighed. There was absolutely no reasoning. "_Why _are you guys so worked up about this?" he demanded.

They stared at him as if he was absolutely bonkers. "Remus," said Sirius slowly, "it's _Quidditch. _Against _Slytherin."_

"And we have to _prove _ourselves," added James in the same slow voice, "because we're _second years._"

"Honestly, Remus," said Sirius, shaking his head. "I don't think you know enough about Quidditch to commentate today."

"I _like _commentating," said Remus woefully. "Anyways, guys, it's just a _game."_

James and Sirius groaned simultaneously. "Quidditch," said James, "is not a _game. _It's a _way of life."_

Remus raised his eyebrows. "You two seriously need hobbies."

–

"And here comes the Gryffindor team!" Remus was yelling into a megaphone a hour later. "Frank Longbottom's shuffled his lineup a bit – due to the... loss of Heddley – and the quitting of Lo – Gryffindor's newest players are James Potter – " The crowd roared. "– and Sirius Black, let's wish them the best of l.."

A roar of boos from the the Slytherin area of the crowd drowned out Remus's words. From the ground, Remus couldn't tell, but he was sure Sirius's fists were clenched to white over his broom, and James was gritting his teeth so badly you could see the muscle working.

Slytherin, predicted Remus, was going to get killed.

"Aannnd they're OFF!" yelled Remus as both teams kicked into the air. "Potter gets the Quaffle and passes to Meadows, Meadows goes in for the goal – go on, Dorcas!"

A chorus of boos and cheers sounded.

"Ahh, bad luck – the Quaffle is Slytherin's, Mulciber intercepts, Avery passes to Goldburgle – ooh, that's going to sting! Goldburgle's hit by a neatly throw Bludger by Marsipal, Gryffindor beater – HE'S DROPPED IT! Potter's taken the Quaffle – YES! HE SCORES! TEN OH GRYFFINDOR!"

The crowd erupted in boos and hisses that were nearly drowned out by cheers. James grinned and did a lap of victory around the stadium.

"Aaaaaaand Slytherin's got the Quaffle – ooh, nice save by Taileon, Gryffindor's third Chaser – she'd grabbed it – she's going for it – go Audrey GO! – NO! Aaaaaaah, Thomas Flint takes it out of her hands – ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Slytherin intercepts – they're going for it – KEEP, GONZO, KEEP – "

"Lupin," came McGonagall's warning voice. "The commentator is to be _unbiased.._"

"Sorry professor – and – aaaahg – I mean – they make it – the score is ten all.. Gryffindor has the Quaffle – Meadows passes to Taielon and – wait a minute – was that the Snitch?

"Frank Longbottom, the Gryffindor Seeker, is swooping down at a lightening fast speed – Rebestan Lestrange is right on his tail – POTTER GETS THE QUAFFLES AWAY FROM MULCIBER, THANKS TO A SPECTACULAR BEATING FROM BLACK – HE SCORES! TWENTY TEN GRYFFINDOR!"

The stadium exploded.

"Taielon has possession – she passes to Meadows – Mulciber intercepts – Avery has the Quaffle – Potter's going in for a steal – WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT YOU CHEATING _SCUM_ – "

For Lucius Malfoy had grabbed the tail end of James's broom to slow him down, grinning maliciously.

"PENALTY TO GRYFFINDOR!" roared Madam Hooch. "PENALTY TO GRYFFINDOR FOR UNPROVOKED SABOTAGE TO THEIR CHASER!"

"Chasers in position – they're lining up for the score – and – YES! IT'S IN! THIRTY TEN, GRYFFINDOR!" The stadium exploded once more.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand – Slytherin has possession – Mulciber passes to Avery – Avery passes to Goldburgle – Goldburgle – DROPS IT! Potter intercepts – neat Bludger from Black! Yeeeeeeees! POTTER SCORES! FORTY TEN, GRYFFINDOR! Ohhh, Slytherin has the Quaffle – Avery to Goldburgle, Goldburgle..makes it..forty twenty.."

Hisses and boos only underlined the wild cheers.

"Potter gets the Quaffle – passes to Meadows – Meadows – _drops _it.." Remus groaned along with the crowd. "Slytherin in possession..Black hits a Bludger at Avery – Avery drops the Quaffle – Goldburgle gets it – he passes to Mulciber – arrrrrghhhhhh..forty thirty.. wait a moment – is that? Oh my – OH GOD! AND – AND – LONGBOTTOM HAS THE SNITCH! CAUGHT IT RIGHT FROM UNDER LESTRANGE'S NOSE – GRYFFINDOR WINS, 170-30! YES! YES! _YEEES!"_

Sirius and James soared through the air, looking as if the brooms supporting them could've fallen away and they would've just floated – they drifted almost lazily to earth, where they helped the entire team mob Frank Longbottom and melted into the huddle that the Gryffindor team had become, hailed from all sides, but the only thing either of them saw was Remus, jumping up and down and screaming with joy.

"Well," James said, grinning from ear to ear as he, Sirius, Remus and Peter finally made their way back to the castle a bit later, "we've accomplished one thing, Sirius – Moony's definitely fallen hard for Quidditch."

* * *

**Well that was fun! I thought writing Quidditch matches would be boring BUT THEY'RE NOT THEY'RE EPIC! :D**

**Yeah yeah it's been forever since I've updated, keep the death threats to a bare minimum, will you? Once again, Imma warp the time line because let's be honest, what else can I do with year two? So from here we're gonna cut to summer, and it _will not be a happy summer at all. _Think Andromeda. And Voldemort. And other stuff.**

**Mwahahahah..**

**I dedicate this chapter to potterride, who knows exactly what I'm prattling on about with Voldemort and potterride if you say anything about it in a review _I will not be pleased, friend._**

**Okkkkay. I'm going to sleep now. Let the reviews commence, if you will! :)  
**


	42. Operation X

Chapter Forty Two  
Operation X

The days melted into one another, March bled into April, April faded into May, May gave way to June, and slowly but surely, second year passed.

"Well, that was a really strange year," reflected Remus. Exams had just finished with relatively few screams, particularly compared to last year, and the Leaving Feast would be that night. It was obvious that Ravenclaw would win, to Andromeda's delight. She and Remus had remained friends, despite the fact that Sirius appeared to never want to look at her again.

"It'll be good to go out with a bang," she'd said.

The Marauders were sitting in, on, and around the beech tree that they had claimed as their own. Sirius was sitting in it, on a low branch, staring distractedly into the lake, worry brewing in his dark eyes as he mulled over the fact that summer was coming. James was hanging by his knees off another branch, his black hair swaying lazily in the breeze. Peter was sprawled under a sheaf of protective leaves, too lazy to move, and Remus was leaned against the white bark.

"It has," agreed James, doing a flip and landing neatly on top of Peter, who let out a very girlish scream. Remus and James laughed as he squirmed out from underneath the taller boy, Sirius smiling vaguely. "It has. Tanarm, to start with."

"And Moony's furry little problem," offered Peter. The four had taken up this mantra, one Remus quite liked. Said werewolf stroked the scar across his face that had turned up mysteriously in mid-April.

"And pranks," contributed Sirius, speaking for the first time in quite a while.

"Always pranks," agreed James. "By the way, Sirius, how's Operation X going?"

Sirius shrugged. "I've gotten no word," he said gloomily.

"What's Operation X?" asked Peter.

Remus, Sirius, and James simultaneously rolled their eyes and sighed, no easy feat. "Only what Sirius and James have been talking about since April, Peter," said Remus dryly.

"I forgot," said Peter pitifully.

"I composed a very proper, in-pure-blood-speech, completely formal letter to my dearest darling - ahem - mother," explained Sirius for the hundredth time. "Basically, it was asking, with a lot of flowery adjectives, if I could spend the summer at James's." He paused. "After what happened over Christmas break, I'd even take a whole summer of listening to how fabulous Lily Evans is than Bellatrix."

"I DO NOT LIKE LILY EVANS," yelled James.

As is always in life, the object of his yelling happened to be sitting the next tree down with a group of _her _friends. She turned to James, and for a moment they both looked at each other in horror. They both turned bright, bright red before spinning back to their respective groups, who were either giggling, in the girls' group, or laughing evilly, in the Marauders' group.

"I've changed my mind," James mumbled, covering his face with his hands. "Sirius, you're not allowed in my house. Ever."

"Too bad," said Sirius, looking remarkably more cheerful. "I'm coming, even if Mum says no."

No one mentioned exactly what had gone down when Sirius was composing the letter, because it was the source of the first fight any of the Marauders had ever gotten into. James had suggested going to Andromeda for help, and Sirius was not impressed, to put it mildly. He had blown up, saying he was never actually speaking to her again and nothing James would say would change that and that was THAT. James had insisted that was quite ridiculous, that Sirius loved Andromeda and the fact that she wanted to leave had no bearing on that. They had yelled back and forth for quite a while until Remus had played role of peacemaker and they had made up. Since then, Andromeda's name was taboo in the Marauders' dormitory.

"Well," said Remus, breaking the brief, content silent, "I do hope she gets back to us soon. We're all going to be there, remember?"

"What?" said Peter, looking startled.

James, Remus, and Sirius sighed again. "Peter," said James patiently, "you and Remus wrote to your parents about three weeks ago asking if you could stay at my house for the summer. They both said yes."

"As long as we go home for the last three weeks," reminded Remus.

"Oh yeah," said Peter, face clearing of confusion. "That. Yeah, Sirius, I hope you can come."

Sirius smiled wryly. "Believe me," he said, "so do I."

Ravenclaw won the House Cup that night. Sirius stared stonily ahead, but the rest of the Marauders stared unabashedly as Andromeda screamed at Dumbledore's announcement and cried her eyes out and hugged everyone in sight and shouted something mad about Ravenclaw beating out Slytherin, to several shrieks of horror from the Slytherin table. She winked at her sister and fell delightedly back into her seat.

"Well, now I get why Andromeda is so happy to win," said Remus in an undertone to James, careful as to not let Sirius, who was shoveling mashed potatoes with a grim look on his face, to hear.

"She wanted to prove just what a Ravenclaw she could be," agreed James quietly.

"Not a bad thing," said Remus fairly. "It is a good way to go out."

The next day - the last day of the year - Andromeda Black witnessed a very strange thing happen.

A sharp beaked owl she recognized as her aunt's flew to Sirius and dropped a letter briskly on his plate.

Andromeda winced, certain that a Howler was about to come.

But no explosion erupted over the hall, no water jugs were upturned, not a pocket of noise other than the rest of the Great Hall's babbles throughout.

_Curious, _she thought. _Why on earth would Walburga write to Sirius? Unless it's Reggie..._

She abandoned this thought, however, when Sirius jumped from his seat and yelled, loud as any Howler, "SHE SAID YES!"

Andromeda had absolutely no clue what was going on, and she didn't particularly care to go down and find out, particularly as McGonagall was scurrying down there herself.

_Whatever it is, _she thought as she took a bite of toast, _I do hope it doesn't have anything to do with Sirius going someplace else for the holidays._

_There is quite a lot I have to tell him._

* * *

**So the formatting in this chapter basically sucks, I realize. Remember a couple chapters back when my computer was busted? I typed a whole bunch of this on GoogleDocs, and the formatting there is rubbish. So yeah, for the next couple chapters it's gonna be sorta all over the place. Readable, I hope.. so sorry!**

**BUT! On a happier note.**

**Finals**

**are**

**OVER!**

**Yipeeeeeee! Can I get a woot woot? No? Okay. Um. Awkward..but yeah. Summer's just round the corner, so updates will either get wildly more common or stop for a while because of all the sleep I'll be catching up on.. :P heh jk..there WILL (probably) be more updates. Heck, I've written up to third year, if I don't do anything summer I might even finish the dang thing. **

**Okay, I've rambled on enough. Hope you enjoyed the fluff - we're not gonna be getting any for a while after this, heh..VOLDEMORT! MWAHAHAHH! - and please drop a review!**

All the best,

~BWX

**PS: Favoriting without reviewing is annoying, please do not.**


	43. Summer

Chapter Forty Three

Summer

"Summer is actually so fantastic," said Sirius, in an awed sort of voice.

"It's only beginning, too," said James, sitting up, eyes shining. "Tomorrow, we're gonna hike down that trail, see? All the way to this whole little forest round it, we can play Quidditch all we want, go as high as the trees, even use real balls.."

"I'll pass, thanks," said Remus, climbing out of the lake.

"Me too," gasped Peter, coming up for air.

The Potters lived in a lovely house out a million miles away from the smog and smoke of London, surrounded by a hundred million little paths and trails and forests and whatnot that you could follow all day, enjoying the twists and turns. When James wasn't being tutored, making mischief, or playing Quidditch in his pre-Hogwarts years, he was exploring these paths, and he knew where every single one led to. So far, the Marauders had gone through about eight or nine of them. Today was a tiny lake, with a lovely flat field stretched out behind it. James and Sirius were stretched across said field, and Peter and Remus were climbing on to it too.

"Well, you guys can stay with my mum," said James. "She'll teach you how to make eclairs. Or you can come, bring a book or something - you can climb the trees there, too.."

"Your mum is awesome," said Sirius admiringly. "I should just live here, y'know."

"You will someday," said James confidently. "Someday, we'll bust you out of that house and you can move in with me. It'll be very amazing."

Sirius laughed. "Yes, I think we should do that," he said decidedly.

The Marauders were in their third week of vacation. It had been absolutely, completely, _amazing_, to put it mildly. They had spent their days exploring, their evenings with Mr. and Mrs. Potter, and their nights sprawled in sleeping bags across the Potters' living room, talking about everything and nothing. Remus and Peter were leaving soon, but Sirius was to stay for the rest of the summer, and they'd all meet up at Diagon Alley on August 27th, where the plan was to stay at the Leaky Cauldron until September 1st, although how they would get Sirius's parents to agree to this was quite undecided.

"Eclairs are delicious," said Peter fervishly.

"I love climbing trees," added Remus. "All right, then I'll come, and Peter can cook, and then when we all move into a big mansion, he can be our chef!"

"Yes, very good," jumped in Sirius before Peter could protest. "You can bake me cakes.."

"And me chocolate," added Remus.

"And me eclairs!" exclaimed James.

"And biscuits.."

"..And turkey.."

"..And jam.."

"..And blueberry pie.."

"..And loads of sweets.."

"And we won't _even _have to have a House Elf!"

"Noooooooooo!" wailed Peter desperately as James, Remus, and Sirius collapsed laughing. "Oh, shut up!"

"But really," said James, collecting himself, "my mum makes amazing eclairs. You'd have no trouble getting married if you could make them, Peter."

"Who'd marry _him?_" joked Sirius, poking Peter with his toe.

"The question is," said Remus, eyes shining uncharacteristically mischievously, "who will _James _marry?"

"That's not a question," dismissed Sirius.

"True," agreed Peter. "He's _obviously _going to marry..wait, who's James gonna marry?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "The Queen of England, Peter," he said sarcastically.

"Never really pinned James as the sort of guy who'd like an Elizabeth, but yeah, definitely," agreed Sirius.

Peter scratched his head.

Remus and Sirius waited, while James bashed his head against the grass.

"_Oh!_" Peter said suddenly. "You mean - _oh! _Evans! Hahahaha!"

"Yes, Peter, that was the joke," said Sirius after a moment.

"I am NOT going to marry Evans OR Queen Elizabeth OR _anyone!" _shouted James, going very red indeed.

"Shh," reproved Remus playfully. "Remember what happened last time you said that so loudly.."

"Aahhhhhghhh." James buried his face in his hands. "I swear I'll never be able to look that girl in the eye again. _Ever._"

"Well, that will make the marriage a bit harder," observed Sirius.

"That's IT," yelled James, and he promptly pushed Sirius into the lake.

It was a few seconds before Sirius swum to the shore. "Oh this is WAAAAAAAR," he shouted, before throwing Peter into the lake.

"What did I do?" wailed Peter as he fell in with a _splash._

"I dunno, you were a standbyer!" yelled Sirius as he pushed James in after Peter.

"Well, that won't do," said Remus to no one in particular. He jumped into the lake himself, dunked Peter and James, and yanked Sirius in after him.

After the three surfaced, they all slowly turned to Remus.

"Oh, this is _waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar,_" said Peter, speaking for them all.

"We're _hommeee!_" shouted James at about seven o'clock that evening as the Marauders trekked into the house, soaking wet. They had had the time of their lives.  
Sirius tried not to think about how lovely it was to think of 'home' and not have a horrible deep pit appear in his stomach. He tried not to think about how it had only it been three weeks, but he already regarded the Potter mansion as 'home', his _only _home, other than Hogwarts. He tried not to think about how Mrs. Potter was so sweet, so wonderful, that she felt rather like his mum, too, and how Mr Potter was so very fatherly that he had become him father as well as James's. He tried not to smile as she hurried into the front hall to greet her son and his friends. He tried not to think about these things, because that would've been terribly sappy, but strangely enough, he couldn't help it.

"What did you all _do?" _fretted Mrs Potter as she regarded them through her spectacles. "Jump in a lake?"

James, Peter, Sirius, and Remus grinned identically and sheepishly.

Mrs. Potter sighed. "Well, I suppose I asked for it when I agreed to let four boys live in my house for two month," she said, smiling herself. "It's a good thing you've come in, though - no moonlit Quidditch tonight, I'm afraid - "

"How do you know about that?" cried Sirius, startled.

Annie Potter somehow managed to look disapproving and amused at the same time. "Mothers know everything," she explained. "There'll be a storm tonight. They say it'll be one of the fiercest we've had in this part of the country for a while. Come on, there's hot chocolate on the stove."

She walked briskly back into the kitchen, but the Marauders didn't follow. They were carefully watching Sirius.

"Well, this isn't going to be fun," he said, thinking that it was to himself. He was sadly misled.

It is a little known fact that it is impossible to keep secrets when you share a dorm with your three best friends. Therefore, it was a well known fact, in the dorm, at least, that Sirius Black did not like rain in the slightest. However, both these facts were completely unknown to Sirius.

"You know," said Remus, seemingly randomly as the four began walking slowly to the kitchen, "I still can't believe that you guys figured out that I was..yeah."

Catching the way this was going, James said, almost mysteriously, "Yeah, well. It's impossible to keep secrets in a dorm with your best friends."

Sirius frowned.

"Agreed," agreed Remus. "By the way, you _have _told your parents?"

"Yeah," said James. "Although I don't quite know why you wanted me to.."

"That would've gone down well," said Remus sarcastically. "'Oh yes, on June 9th and July 19th I'm going to have to transform into a ravenous beast, could you just lend me your shed?'"

James laughed. "Well, it _did _go down well," he said fairly. "And you're not a ravenous beast."

Quite suddenly, Sirius exhaled. "It's _impossible _keeping _anything _from you!" he exclaimed frustratedly.

James, Peter, and Remus smiled. "Yeah, well," shrugged Remus. "That's what awesome Marauder friends are for, y'know."

"And also," put in James, "the rain is real loud in my living room, but you can barely hear it in my room. So, we'll be there tonight."

Sirius smiled, and because saying anything else would be too sappy, the four Marauders walked in amiable silence to the kitchen to enjoy Mrs. Potter's glorious hot chocolate and eclairs.

Mrs Potter outdid herself making dinner that night, with a huge pile of chicken legs on a silver platter, a vat of creamy mashed potatoes, and a plate of buttery corncobs.

"So," said Mr Potter as they all sat down to dinner, "what's your boys' plan for tomorrow?"

"Quidditch in the clearing," said James, helping himself to corn, "but maybe Peter's staying in.."

"Oh," said Mrs Potter happily, "I'll show you how to make eclairs."

"I love those," said Peter happily, munching on a chicken leg.

"This is _delicious, _Mrs. Potter," said Remus with relish as he yanked a bite out of a corncob.

Annie chuckled. "Thank you, dear," she said, smiling. "There's double chocolate cake for desert."

If Remus's smile had gotten any bigger, Sirius thought, it would've quite fallen off his face.

But then, he realized, his couldn't be much smaller.

Not for long, of course.

"Storm's coming," noted Mr. Potter as a rumble of thunder sounded, followed quickly by a flash of lightening that lit up the table. Sirius flinched almost  
imperceptibly, but of course Marauders never miss anything. Almost imperceptibly, three boys moved slightly closer to Sirius.

Mothers never miss anything, either.

"Did you know," said Mrs. Potter, spooning potatoes on James's plate, "they say that ice cream is nothing to fear."

Everyone in the room stared at Mrs. Potter. "Er," said James hesitantly, "it's..not?"

Mrs Potter looked at her son, arms folded. "And when was the last time _you _ate ice cream and didn't get brain freeze, young man?" she said severely.

James opened his mouth, and then closed it.

"See," said Mrs. Potter cheerfully. "Ice cream is incredibly dangerous."

"In the same way," said Mr. Potter, cottoning on, "they say storms are nothing to fear."

"But, if we look at the metaphor," finished Mrs. Potter, "we can understand that that is a big fat heap of stupidity, because obviously they are."

The Marauders looked at each other, utterly bewildered.

"Oh!" said James suddenly. "_I _get it! Um, kind of."

"Yeah," said Peter slowly. "I..I think."

"I think it's that a lot of things can be slightly terrifying in certain ways, even ice cream, and even..rain, and there isn't actually anything wrong with that," translated Remus.

"Exactly," said Mrs Potter triumphantly, just as there was a huge crack of thunder, an enormous flash of lightening, the rain began to pour, and the room was encased in darkness.

That was when pandemonium struck, and it struck badly. In an ordinary situation, it would only be Peter screaming. If _this _was an ordinary situation, then Sirius might possibly be screaming. But in this particular situation, everyone in that dining room was screaming.

The reasoning behind this was that two men in black masks and black robes with the sleeves rolled up and a tattoo of a snake and a skull burned on to their arms became visible as lightening illuminated the room. No one knew where they had come from, but there they were.

* * *

**I _love _cliffhanger endings..don't you? -cackles cheerfully- **

**Yeah, I'm BACK! But sadly my stupid Internet DIED. Luckily I found my old USB disc under 43980 piles of junk, so yeah. You can count on updates this summer even if (horror of horrors) I don't get my internet back. But again with the formatting - it's gonna be weird-ish for a bit.**

**Also, next chapter will end with the biggest cliffhanger of the century, and will also take this story into somewhat AU-ishness. Well, it'll veer off of interview-canon anyways..make of that wha**t **you will! -cackles loudly and evilly**-

**Review! Oh, and check out my and potterride's joint account, sweet-potter xx.**


	44. Over

**A/N: Hello hello hello! So this is extreme angst and said extreme angst will not be over till like chapter fifty two or something. I just finished the angstyness and I literally was jumping up and down with joy when I did..writing angst is HARD.**

**Okay! On to the angst!**

Chapter Forty Four

Over**  
**

"ANNIE!" roared Henry Potter, leaping to his feet, wand in hand, "Annie, get the boys and run! Now! Go!"

Mrs Potter didn't have to be told twice. She pulled the Marauders to their feet, trying to make sure they were all there and keeping her face straight and looking calm at the same time. "Come on, boys, let's go out," she said firmly, "and it'll be all right."

"DAD!" James was screaming. "I - HAVE - TO - STAY - WITH - MY - DAD!"

"James, _come_," said Mrs Potter desperately. Henry was currently fighting off two Death Eaters (that was all they couldv_possibly _be, the servants of Voldemort, Death Eaters) at once, and it didn't look good for him.

"James," said Sirius sternly. "Come. Now."

"But my dad," shouted James.

"Yes, James, we're not _helping _him by staying in her and _worrying _him!" thundered Sirius. "Let's _get out!_"

James was shaking and crying and screaming at the same time, but at Sirius's words, he stumbled behind his mother outside. Tears were streaming down Peter's face, but Remus looked strangely calm. Sirius's face was unreadable.

An eternity later, Sirius, James, Peter, Remus, and Mrs Potter were outside in the pouring rain. Sirius's face was ashen and twisted, but he stood still as one can possibly stand in a thunderstorm. Peter stood shuddering next to Mrs Potter. Remus stood as calmly as he always stood, but a look at him said that he was terrified out of his very skull.

James only cried, shoulders shaking, tears disappearing beneath the storm, looking more torn apart than anyone had ever seen him.

Sirius edged closer to him and carefully put an arm around him. "It's going to be all right, James," he whispered. "I swear it is."

"No it isn't," whispered James, shaking, and Sirius felt sick to his stomach, not just because of the rain around him, which was terrifying in itself, not just because he _was _terrified of rain, which was _sickening _in itself, but because this was _wrong, _wrong, wrong, _wrong, _for James Potter to be so scared, James was the one who was always put together, always laughing, and because of these stupid men in black robes, Death Whatevies, probably, he wasn't, and that was so _wrong.._

"It is, it is," Sirius swore blindly, and he buried all the feelings of fear deep inside him, because this wasn't the time for his own stupid babyish feelings, it was a time for his friends. "James, please, it's gonna be fine, don't cry, James.."

James gasped as sparks flew up from their house.

"It's going to be fine," said Sirius, not believing his own words in the slightest.

Remus and Peter edged closer to them, and for what seemed like forever the Marauders stood in a circle with James in the general middle and Mrs Potter close by, protecting each other from the world but knowing it couldn't last.

Maybe it was minutes but it seemed like hours. Finally, there was a triumphant scream, something that sounded like, "_It's over, Potter!_" and two broomsticks took off into the sky.

"Dad!" James screamed, breaking the momentary silence that had fallen. He tore back to the house, with Mrs Potter, Sirius, Remus, and Peter close on his heels.

When they reached the house, James stopped. His hand lingered on the doorknob.

Sirius, terror bubbling in him, pushed past him. "Mr Potter?" he yelled, barging inside. "Mr Potter, are you all right?"

Mrs Potter gasped as they entered the front hall. It had been demolished. The pictures of James and the family were in pieces. There were holes and cracks in the walls.

"Henry?" called Mrs Potter, forging ahead through her destructed home towards the dining room. "_Henry?_"

They reached the dining room. The door had been blown away.

Remus fell, Sirius abandoned regard and cried, Peter screamed, James began to laugh, and then there was silence. The world ended quietly as they all laid eyes on Henry John Potter, lying dead on his own dining table.


	45. Falling

Chapter Forty Five

Falling

Remus didn't know what to do when he standing in the rain, so he did what he did best: he kept calm.

A hundred million thoughts had been rushing through his head, and he was worrying about James and James's dad and James's mother and Sirius, Sirius, who hated rain, and himself, and what was going to _happen? _Oh damn, what was going to _happen? _He was terrified, terrified, terrified, and all the while the most incongruous tangent thoughts were stringing into his head, like how awful the wet grass felt under his feet even though normally he _loved _wet grass, and how if they took three lefts they'd be back to where they were this morning.

But he was Remus Lupin, and he had to keep his face straight or else who knew what would happen? He didn't cry, he didn't let his smooth, calm facial expression shift. He was _going _to stay strong, for weeping Peter and crazy James and struggling Sirius. He kept himself together, kept himself calm, stayed as Remus Lupin as he always was.

But when he saw Mr. Potter lying dead on the ground, he broke. He was falling, falling, falling, and there was nothing else to do, and strong Remus Lupin was nowhere, replaced by this falling, terrified, empty, broken boy.


	46. Tears

Chapter Forty Six

Tears

His whole life, Sirius was taught, "Never show emotion. Never tell them what you're thinking." First by his mother, guarding him from Muggleborns. Then Andromeda, guarding him from his parents. To himself, as well, over and over again, all through Hogwarts. _Keep your face straight. Don't tell them what you're thinking. Don't let anything get to you, and if it does, pretend it doesn't._ Through Howlers and fights, he'd tried so hard to keep this up, but if only it was easier.

He decided he'd been improving throughout his life, and when he thought those terribly sappy thoughts a million years ago in the Potters' front hall, he'd managed to keep his face straight. If his friends hadn't known him so terribly well, they wouldn't at all know what was going on inside him - no one else did, he was certain of that.

Thus, when James broke down outside, Sirius put all his years of practice to work, pretended his own feelings didn't exist, and set his face as if it was carved from stone.

But when he saw Mr. Potter, one of the only people he'd actually ever trusted, dead, dead, and gone, gone, gone forever, he remembered the conversation he'd had with him at the beginning of the summer and he'd given up, and impassive Sirius Black was nowhere, replaced by this sobbing, angry, empty, broken boy.


	47. Screaming

Chapter Forty Seven

Screaming

He'd always been second best, Peter Pettigrew had. Or third best or fourth best. He never quite understood the pranks being pulled, he was always two homework assignments behind, he couldn't for the life of him figure out potions. He didn't care, though. All he needed were his friends, being there, being his friends.

Without really realizing it, he'd become dependent on them. As long as they were put together, as long as they were smiling and laughing and ready to explain anything to him, he was all right. Even if he was hanging on to sanity by the skin of his teeth, if the skin was attached to his friends, he would be okay.

When his friends fell apart - when Remus plain fell down and didn't get up, when Sirius started to cry, when James _laughed _- then he was not okay. So he did the only thing he could think to. He screamed. He screamed and screamed and screamed and tried to let the world know he was terrified, that he needed help.

But no one heard him.


	48. Laughing

Chapter Forty Eight

Laughing

James was screaming and crying and breaking down busily outside, and strangely enough, it felt good. It felt good to throw cautions to the wind - and the rain, and the thunder, and the lightening - and just scream and cry and not care about what anyone thought. He didn't think about Sirius and how terrified he must be, he just thought about himself.

When he went inside and saw his home demolished, he was shocked. He didn't really think for an instant that anything had happened to his dad.

When James saw his dad dead, when the world ended, a conversation that he was not supposed to have heard between Sirius and James's father from the beginning of the summer came flashing back to him.

"_Got a letter from your dad, Sirius?"_

"_No, Mr. Potter."_

"_Have you gotten any letters?"_

"_..Well, not really."_

"_Oh? Why not?"_

"_My parents..my dad doesn't..they don't really care..too much about me, y'know?"_

"_What?"_

"_Yeah. They kinda..hate me. They're the Blacks, y'know.."_

"_I knew your mother wasn't, ah, fond of you, but.."_

"_That's one way to put it...but yeah, my dad pretty much never disagrees with my mum..doesn't talk much, my dad. Never really sticks up for me, never really says much against me - well, except once or twice..but yeah."_

_There was a moment of silence._

"_You know you have me, right, Sirius?"_

"_..'Scuse me?"_

"_You'll always have me...if you need to..talk..about anything at all, you can come straight to me, honestly."_

"_Thanks, Mr. Potter. Really."_

He remembered listening to that conversation, and a peal of laughter escaped from him because he was _jealous _of Sirius that day, jealous that his dad was sharing the love, jealous, green, envious, _jealous. _Once he started laughing, he couldn't stop.


	49. Silence

Chapter Forty Nine

Silence

After the worst thirty seconds of anyone's life, there was silence.

"Not like I wasn't expecting this," said Mrs Potter quietly. She crouched silently next to her husband and brushed his inky black hair out of his unseeing hazel eyes. "Henry, Henry, Henry..oh my Henry."

For some reason, she looked as much a child than the Marauders, perhaps younger, a little girl who her best friend and her only love all in thirty seconds - if young girls can have only loves, which they could, because the look of unbearable pain matched the childlike expression on Mrs Potter's face.

"Oh my Henry," she repeated. "Oh, oh my Henry."

None of the Marauders spoke, because there was nothing to say. Nothing at all.

"Oh, my Henry," she murmured, closing his eyes and closing her eyes. "What am I going to do now?"

In all silence, tears began pouring down her cheeks and face. She held out her arms, and James crumpled into them, and the rest of the Marauders crumbled to the ground next to her, and she stroked their hair, rubbed their necks, and she was there for them. For a few moments, there was only silence. Shared unspoken pain thickened the air.

"Oh, my Henry," murmured Mrs Potter an eternity later, as the five came apart. She stroked her husband's hair, and a smile appeared on her face. "Oh, my love. Goodbye. Goodbye."

She looked up at her son and his friends. "Weaker people than us have gotten through losses," she said quietly, threading her hands out of her love's hair. "We are the opposite of weak, my children. We will overcome this."

"Dad," croaked, not James, but Sirius.

"And don't you worry, either, Sirius," said Mrs. Potter catching his eye. "You won't be going home anytime soon. You're staying right here, with us."

She swept her hands together briskly. "I need to send a few letters, make a few Floo calls," she said, almost to herself. She walked quickly out of the room, holding herself straight, although pain was clear in the way she walked - pain, but healing.

James crawled quietly to his father and held his hand in his.

"What are we going to do now?" he asked of everyone, anyone, in a tiny, tiny voice.

Sirius sighed and sat down next to his friend. "We're going to do the only thing we can, James," he said softly. "We're going to stick together and forge ahead and make it out of here alive."

"Together," said Remus, sitting down.

"Together," said Peter, sitting down.

"We will," said James, after forever. "We will...probably." He gripped his father's lifeless hand in his own.

"No probably," said Sirius firmly, in a voice so strong no one could help but believe him. "We _will _get out of this."

No one voiced the word that was on all their minds.

_Someday._

* * *

**Sadness, sadness, sadness. :(**

**Ah well, _I'm _finished _writing_ the sadness. _Pity _you all aren't finished _reading _it. -gloats rudely-**

**I'm sorry. -gives everyone lollipops- Yay! Lollipops!**

**Raise your hand if you love Mrs. Potter. I do, even though I feel a bit rude saying that. Still. I try to make her like Mrs. Weasley.**

**Eat your lollipops! There will be more if you review!**


	50. Tanarm

Chapter Fifty

Tanarm

After Mr. Potter's funeral – possibly one of the worst days in James Potter's life – the Marauders concentrated on one thing and one thing only: being together. No matter what, no Marauder was ever alone for too long. Often, they would go exploring, but the wild happiness that came with summer had faded. When they reached their destination, they would only sit, in silence, thinking, grieving, remembering, recovering. That, somehow, was enough.

Life went on. The relatives that had flocked the house slowly went home. Mrs. Potter returned to her job. The days of together stretched bleakly in front of the Marauders. In the end of July, just before Remus and Peter were due to go home, the four received the shock of their lives.

It was at breakfast. Remus was poring over the newspaper. Suddenly, he spat his orange juice out.

"Urgh," pronounced Sirius. "What happened?"

"Tanarm's dead!"

James and Peter looked up. "_What?"_

"And – oh my God! Tanarm's – oh my GOD!"

"WHAT?" shouted Sirius.

Remus held up the newspaper obituaries and read aloud. "Thomas Archon Tanarm, aged forty four, was recently found dead in his backyard. It was for the first time discovered that he was a werewolf – "

"_WHAT?"_

" – wait, it gets weirder – 'a fact that he kept hidden from the magical world. During his short teaching career at Hogwarts, he would go home every night for the full moon and Transform in private. On further investigation, it was discovered that he in fact accidentally murdered his own wife, leading him to almost madness. He was severely depressed, and obviously was greatly self-depreciating, to levels of extremity. He worked the rest of his life against werewolves. He is most likely to be have been killed in a transformation, however; investigations are taking place.." He trailed off, staring at the paper as if certain it was lying to him.

There was a silence.

Peter cleared his throat. "I was not expecting that."

"Tanarm.." Peter stared at the newspaper as well, at a loss for words.

"Well, that does clear up a few loose bits," said Sirius grimly, standing up and putting his plate in the sink. "Why in the world he hated werewolves so much, for one."

"Now I feel horrible," said Remus quietly, folding the paper, "for thinking of him so badly."

There was a long silence, as the Marauders remembered, feared, worried, tried to find rights for their behavior and struggled to put their minds around the mind-blowing information they'd just received.

"R.I.P," murmured Sirius. "Thomas Tanarm. A truly awful teacher, but.. somewhat justified."

"R.I.P," echoed his friends.

* * *

**Hee, hee, told you I'd get back at Tanarm..**

**I don't feel bad about it, either! So there!**

**I'm so very sorry, but the sad won't be over for a LONG time. And don't whine about it! Imagine having to write it all - argh, it was torture..**

**(I totally loved every second of it.)**

**Here's another lollipop for Jezabel Raewin because she's an amazing person who reviewed within like ten seconds of me uploading a chapter. :) Oh, and for everyone else because I'm a softie and have too many lollipops. Stupid badgers!  
**

**But that's another story. Review! :D  
**


	51. Decisions

Chapter Fifty One

Decisions

James stopped talking.

It was just after Remus and Peter left. One night, he said "good night" to his mother and Sirius and when he woke up he was not speaking. Not just to Sirius, but simply, he stopped talking. It was insane and frightening and a million other things and neither Sirius or Mrs. Potter knew what the heck to _do._

"I should really leave, Mrs. Potter," said Sirius quietly one night at dinner.

"Nonsense," said Annie firmly. "You are staying here, Sirius. Exactly as was planned." And that was that.

But nothing upon nothing would get James to open his mouth. Furthermore, after a few days of terrifying silence, he began to disappear for long periods of time, without telling anyone where he had gone.

The hurt inside Sirius was ebbing away and quietly being replaced by worry and fear. Worry and fear are not exactly happy emotions to have, as Sirius reflected, but they were much better than the pain he felt before.

He was worried not only about James, but about Mrs. Potter. She had been coming along so well – working and grieving at the same time, allowing herself time for tears and time for professionalism, taking loans from here and paying back people there, collecting the life insurance and using her dowry, making absolutely certain that they were going to keep their house and everything they owned..

But when James silenced, then began to disappear, she simply fell apart. Her hair went greyer than it had already been, the smiles disappeared from her eyes, the house's mess increased, the house's meals began to consist of tomato sauce and chips and the like.

Something had to be done, so Sirius took the reins. He began to clean, and he recalled the Muggle recipes Andromeda had taught him when he was ten and got dinners on the table every night and breakfasts in the morn. He took over, and he began to feel stronger. More in control.

Soon, the Potters and Sirius fell into a routine. Every morning, Sirius would wake up at seven and fix a quick breakfast. Mrs. Potter, him, and James would gather in the kitchen and eat, Sirius and Mrs Potter making conversation. At first, it was strained and awkward, but as the days wore on, the two found themselves bound by a feeling of loss, hurt, and fear, and they could speak freely to one another about anything and everything and all at the same time nothing. Mrs. Potter would leave, Sirius would talk to James, yell at James, accuse James of wild things, beg James to talk..but nothing would ever work, and after a while, he stopped trying and washed the dishes and wiped down the table and swept the counters in complete silence. An hour of nothing later, James would disappear. In the beginning, Sirius would run after him as fast as he could, yelling for him to come back, but James always disappeared into one of the various paths and lost Sirius. As the days wore on, Sirius stopped chasing him, and he would spend the day picking up, thinking, reading, and writing letters until Mrs. Potter came home. He would talk to her while making dinner, and eventually James would come home, sometimes caked with mud and dirt but usually the same as he was when he left. They would eat, and go to bed early, but Sirius would never fall asleep until the early scarlet sunlight brushed the hills.

The letters to and fro Remus and Peter were the only things, at times, that kept Sirius quite sane. They were the only letters received in the house.

One early morning, however, when Sirius's owl flew in the window as he and James were clearing up after breakfast, it was carrying a dark blue envelope that he knew immediately was not from Remus or Peter.

James took the washcloth and plate that Sirius was holding and began wiping it down. Sirius cautiously walked over to Godric, let him flutter onto his elbow, and slit open the letter. His eyes soared over the contents, and when he was done, he sank into a chair, head in his hands.

_Sirius,_

_ Diagon Alley tomorrow, 3 in the afternoon._

_ Come alone._

_ We need to talk._

-_Andromeda_

–

On the one hand, Sirius wanted to see his cousin, he truly did – he wanted something to be as it had once been. On the other hand, he was still angry at Andromeda. On one foot, he could barely remember what he was angry about, and he quite felt that it was time to make up with her. On the next foot, he didn't _want _to make up with her, if only for stubbornness. On his – back, it would honestly be amazing to get the weight of his grudge at her off his chest.

He had absolutely no idea what to do, in total.

He found himself wishing he could talk to James about it.

_But you can't, nyah nyah, _sneered quite a rude little voice in his brain. _You're on your own now, Black._

He sighed and dropped onto a chair, burying his face in his hands.

He was on his own.

–

"Trouble, Sirius?" asked Mrs. Potter during dinner that night.

James eyed his friend. Sirius poked restlessly at the dinner he'd prepared himself: soup and dry fruit.

"I'm.." Sirius sighed. "I'm all right," he lied quietly. "Just..just fine."

He couldn't tell Mrs. Potter what was going on. She had enough trouble as it was.

–

After dinner that night, Sirius and James retired to their bedroom. As usual, James lay down and closed his eyes immediately, waiting for Sirius to turn off the light.

Sirius lingered by the doorway, watching his friend silently, willing him to talk, to open his stupid mouth and help him, to understand that he couldn't handle this, he couldn't run a stupid house _and _deal with this, and he was honestly about to explode and he couldn't do this, and he was only thirteen, for God's sake, and that he needed someone – that he needed James..

But of course, James lay still and silent.

Sirius sighed, flicked the light off, and climbed into bed.

–

_ He was dying. Mr. Potter was dying, in front of Sirius, and there was nothing he could do to help him. And Mrs. Potter was crying and James was yelling and Sirius had to do _something _but he couldn't, he could only stand and watch and listen to his own mother, listen to her yelling about how she always knew he was a failure, that he'd never amount to anything, because he was a blood-traitor, and that he was worthless._

_ Mr. Potter was dying, and Sirius couldn't do anything._

_ And then he disappeared with a crack, and in his place was Andromeda, lying there frozen and broken and blood was slowly trickling out from all round her, and she was dead and he had never said goodbye to her, and he'd never forgiven her._

_ There was nothing he could do. All there was to do was scream. And scream, and scream and scream and scream and scream and scream and he was drowning, and he couldn't get out, and he was stuck.._

Someone pulled him out.

Sirius woke up with a gasp. _Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.._

He ran his hand through his hair. _Yep, going to see Meda tomorrow.._

It wasn't only, he supposed, the dream that had done it. It was the realization that they were entering war – real and true war, the likes of which he'd never in his life seen – Mr. Potter's death marked the beginning of it, and if there were going to be any more horrors like that – and there would be – he was going to need as many people on his side as he could get.

* * *

**Hey guys :)**

**Lately I've been feeling..I dunno..that this story isn't really worth writing, and if it is I should go back and improve it. So I'm probably gonna continue it, just out of habit and because it's fun, but I want to know: how can I improve? Please tell me in a review. Thanks :D**


	52. Andromeda Again

Chapter Fifty Two  
Andromeda Again

Sirius went to Diagon Alley himself, as Mrs. Potter insisted. She said that if he wanted to go see his cousin and was going to see her alone, he might as well go alone, and that James would be fine by himself, that he would go later on, just before summer ended.

Although, realized Sirius as he spun through the Floo, that time was uncomfortably near. It was August 19th – there was barely a week till third year started..and Sirius, in all honesty, wasn't really sure how that was going to work out. James was still not actually saying anything, and he was fairly sure that talking was a vital part of attending Hogwarts.

He landed with a _thump _into Flourish and Blotts. He stood up, dusted himself off, and strode out of the shop, heart thudding.

–

It was ridiculously difficult, walking anywhere near Floreon Fortescue's. It appeared, that after just a few months of pretending Andromeda did not exist, he had lost the ability to actually realize she _did _exist.

Actually, it was more like he didn't want to, because he was terrified of what she was going to say to him and what if she'd tell him that he was a horrible human being and she'd never talk to him again or what if she was going to elope with Ted and leave him all alone and move to Sweden or Rome or what if she had _already _eloped with Ted and she didn't even show up and did he even really want to see her because the last time he had seen her it had _not ended well _and the last time he had seen _any _of his family it had ended in fish slapping and –

"Sirius! SIRIUS!"

_Andromeda._

_ Andromeda._

_ Meda. Meda. Meda._

_ Oh, Meda Meda Meda –_

And abandoning all pretense, Sirius ran straight into Andromeda's arms.

–

He hugged her for longer than he later cared to admit. Later, in fact, he would quite pretend that he had coolly walked up to her and flicked her an infamous smile, and said something like, "How's it been, cuz?" No one except him, Andromeda, Florean Fortescue, and later James, knew exactly what had happened at that point in time.

He had run into her arms and hugged her for a long, long time, trying to plead with her to forgive him and at the same time trying to let her apology leak into him, but he only worked this all out later. At the point, all he'd thought about was her, Andromeda, his cousin, finally.

She smelled like wild roses and mints, he'd later recalled, and she was wearing fresh clean pressed green robes. She was hugging him back, quite tightly, and for a few moments he left everything he was worried about – Mr. Potter's death and James melting away and Mrs. Potter and his own mother – melt quietly into Andromeda's embrace, and for a few moments everything was completely fine.

"He's dead, Meda," Sirius choked out when he broke away. "Mr. Potter – I was staying with him and these men in masks and – "

"I know," said Andromeda gently, pushing him into a chair. "I know, it was in the _Prophet. _'Leaving a widow and a son, and rumour has it that young Sirius Black was staying with them as well', I think it was.."

"It was," he agreed feverishly. "And it's terrible, Andi, I have to – I just – I'm trying to keep it together, I'm trying to help them, I'm cooking meals with what you taught me and I pick up house but I'm so – so worried and I don't – and you're mad at me, you hate me, and Bellatrix, and Mum, and oh God, what are they going to _do _to me next time I see them?"

"Sirius," said Andromeda soothingly. "Calm down, Sirius. Come on, Sirius, calm down. It's going to be all right. It's going to be fine."

It was because it was Andromeda, he supposed, because her word was gospel truth, so he did calm down. Somewhat.

"First of all," she began, "if you've been cooking for them, and picking up house, then you do _not _have to worry about them. You are doing absolutely more than enough, Sirius. I'm so proud of you."

A little bit of life returned to Sirius.

"I am most certainly _not _angry at you," Andromeda went on. "In fact, as I have already said, I am deeply proud of you. However, your third worry.." She paused. "Yes, that is quite..valid."

Sirius felt as if an electric shock had run him through. "Why?" he demanded.

Andromeda sighed and spread her hands over the table. "Sirius, you've heard of Voldemort."

"Yeah, course."

"And Death Eaters, of course."

"Yeah, course." Sirius's hands clenched. "Just killed Mr. Potter, would be hard _not _to hear about them.."

"They want you to become Death Eaters," said Andromeda quickly.

Sirius fell off the chair.

–

An hour and much information later, Sirius was flying through fireplaces back to the Potters' home. He fell hard on the ground, mind reeling.

_My parents._

_ Want me to work for the man that killed Mr. Potter._

_ What. The. Hell?_

_ And she's going to marry Ted Tonks. Oh God, oh God, oh God.._

Earlier, perhaps, Sirius might've been more angry about the Ted Tonks factor. But now, he couldn't quite bring himself to be. All he could think about was the fact that his parents wanted him, and his brother, to work for the man that murdered his best friend's father.

Suddenly, he saw James, darting across the doorway to the kitchen, obviously on his way outside.

_Oh no you don't, _thought Sirius impulsively.

He ran after him.

James turned back, saw him, and ran faster. Sirius chased him, and for a moment they were back up on their brooms in Hogwarts, flying a million miles up in the air, running drills.

Sirius Black had no broom at this point, but he could be very fast when he wanted to be.

He most certainly wanted to be.

For ages they ran, out the door and cutting through the woods. He chased James for what seemed like hours but was probably only a couple of minutes. Finally, the bespectacled boy ran out of steam, the one with mangy hair picked up speed, and James collapsed in a heap, Sirius pinning him down, in some sort of clearing Sirius had never been to before.

"You – have – to – stop – this," grunted Sirius, holding James down. "You – have – to – talk!"

All at once, James stopped struggling. Sirius let go of him.

James crumpled up in a small sorry heap and began to sob.

Sirius waited.

James took a breath, and then for the first time in too long, James Potter spoke.

* * *

**Hi! I'm not dead, see? Yeah I updated like twice in the summer, but I'm BACK now! :D**

**Lots of homework these days, and thus, lots of time to procrastinate. Enjoy reading my terrible rantings about how awful school is and WHY DOES SCIENCE EXIST for the next ten months! Have fun!**

**Also: yay! A cliffie!**

**(Side note: I don't really like this ending. I fiddled with the last line for, like, fifty years. Yeah. Review anyway.)**


	53. Healing

**WARNING: Insane angst ahead, as per usual. However it has a happy ending this time!**

* * *

Chapter Fifty Three

Healing

A slew of words came spilling out, and for a long time – perhaps it was hours – James and Sirius sat in the middle of the woods, and James spoke.

"For the longest time," said James in a quiet, shaking voice, but a voice all the same, "for the longest time I couldn't believe it, I couldn't believe that my dad was dead, because my dad..my whole life my dad was always there. No matter what happened, no matter what might happen to us, my dad was always there. He never cried, he never flinched, he was always..just..there. And now he's..not. And for a long time I couldn't believe it. Because when Remus, and Peter, when they were here and we were all together nothing seemed real. Even when we were all quiet, even when we were all just thinking, I could never wrap my mind around it.

"I would lie in bed for hours at night, saying to myself, over and over and over, that my dad was dead, that my dad was dead, that my dad was dead. But I would never quite understand it. I would try to work through it, try to convince myself that I _no longer had a dad. _I kept telling myself that nothing was going to be the same, that it would always be different, that I was never going to be happy again..but I didn't believe it.

"And then – just after Remus and Peter left – it hit me so damn hard, that I didn't have a dad, everything I was convincing myself of came rushing back to me..and it scared me, it scared the hell out of me, the thought that I might never smile again, the thought that I would never be – be a Marauder again..and I was shocked and terrified and the idea just got all the words out of me.."

"James, you know – " Sirius began, but James plunged on.

"All that time I was silent, all that time I had disappeared, I was drowning, the whole time, I was drowning in my grief and sadness and hate – I had hate there, there was always hate, hate for Voldemort, hate for Death Eaters, hate for myself, hate for my dad, for dying, hate for my mum, for being okay, hate for you, for wanting me to talk, hate for Remus and Peter, for leaving, hate for Andromeda, and Snape, and McGonagall, and Evans and Dumbledore and _the whole entire world. _I just hated them, hated them all. I tried that, for a bit – I tried to submerge myself into my hate and anger and fury because I thought it would stop the pain a bit, but it didn't work. There was always that pain, that burning feeling inside my chest that told me _I was not okay. _Right here, cross my chest, it was burning and smoldering, like there used to be a rock there, keeping me together, safe and happy and perfect and okay and when I realized that my dad died it exploded into a hundred million pieces and it filled me with fire. And I wanted it to stop stop _stop _but it never never _never _would, I thought, it would be there, it would be there _forever, _and I was drowning in it, drowning in a black ocean and I _could – not – get – out._

"And so..I didn't try. I stopped, I just let myself drown in it. I would disappear each morning, hide into the woods, places my dad had never seen, you know, and just sit there rolling in my grief, and it felt _horrible _but it was all I could do. And now..and now.."

All at once James stopped talking, as if he had quite run out of words.

There was a long time of silence, and then Sirius, who had still been trying to wrap his head around the fact that Andromeda was running away to be with Ted Tonks before this new information had come to him, finally absorbed everything, and he looked at James square in the eyes and heaved a great big sigh that summed up everything that had been going on all summer.

"Yeah, well," said Sirius heavily, "everything you've ever thought was a lie, wasn't it, because you _are _going to be happy again, you just..needed some..time."

The boys looked at each other.

And they smiled.

"Well," said James, standing up and brushing his hands together, "I _am _glad that's over, truly I am.."

Sirius blinked. "Wait, what?"

"Yeah – " said James professionally – "I think that's about it. I'm done with grief and the like. In books and stories and the like people are 'never the same' but I think I will be, actually. I mean, a month of silence, Si, it takes a lot outta ya, and that whole speech I just gave..yep, I think I'll be just fine now."

"Really?" said Sirius dubiously.

"Yes," said James, and his smile was real, it reached his eyes, his hazel eyes were sparkling once more, and Sirius felt a smile spring to his own face. "I do believe all I needed was to get that out..

"Y'know, I'd better go talk to my mum, she'll be worried sick..more tears, maybe, and then.."

James took a breath and began walking out of the forest, and the spring was back in his step and Sirius knew that his best friend was now just fine.

"Then we're all going to be just fine."

–

That evening, after many tears and talking with Mrs. Potter, James came into his bedroom, where Sirius had been waiting, quite sure that the mother/son talk should be primarily between mother/son.

"How'd it go?" Sirius asked as James collapsed on his bed, burying his face in a pillow.

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh," groaned James.

"_That _bad?"

"Actually," said James, lifting his face, "it went quite well, considering. It's just that my vocal cords are _not _designed for so much crying."

"Well they will if – " Sirius began, but cut himself off quickly. "Okay, cool."

James threw a pillow lazily at him. "Sirius, you can joke round," he said tiredly. "I _told _you, I'm done with grief. Honestly I am. I've been stuck in it for a whole month and honestly, it's not that fun of a place. Give me the Bahamas any day, any time."

Sirius studied James. "Are you really.."

"Yep, I'm done," said James, propping himself up on his elbows. "Mum is, too. We've cried ourselves out pretty much. I mean, I guess that point in time, the exact _day _Dad died, will always be a sore bit, and I'm not gonna tell any old Joe on the street about him, and of course I'll always be a little – you know – when dads come up or whatever – blimey, I'm not making any sense, am I? Anyway, Sirius, seriously, I'm fine, I'm ready to laugh again – I _want _to laugh again. So make your joke."

"I can't even remember it now," said Sirius after a moment.

They laughed, anyways.

"What's that?" asked Sirius after a moment, pointing to something he hadn't noticed before.

"Oh, this?" said James, touching the leather cord around his neck. Dangling from it was a small grey stone, with the initials J.P carved into it. "Well, it was my dad's – no, not exactly, my dad bought it when I was born and he was gonna give it to me on my sixteenth birthday but.." James bit his lip, "well, that plan was ruined, I s'pose. So, Mum gave it to me just now, said I might as well have it at this point. I don't actually plan on taking it off, ever."

Sirius smiled and rolled onto his back. "That's cool," he said. "Really it is..HEY I remembered my joke!"

"What was it?"

"I said you'd better get used to crying because Evans will never, ever go out with you."

James jumped onto Sirius's bed and punched him in the nose.

"That," he said, "is the _most _insensitive thing you could _possibly _say, do you _know _that?"

But he was grinning.

Later that night, when the lights were off, James's voice rose through the dark.

"What did Andromeda say, then?"

Sirius rolled over.

"My..my parents.." his voice trailed off. "My God, I hate my parents," he muttered.

"What did they do now?" asked James, sitting up.

"They want me and Reg to be Death Eaters," said Sirius tonelessly. "That was why they wanted me home for Christmas..they were going to talk to me..get me used to the idea..but after Christmas, and the whole fish thing, that plan was temporarily spoiled. But only temporarily.."

Fireworks went off in James's brain. "_What?_" he spat. "Those – "

"Don't start, James," said Sirius wearily. "It's been a long day. Can't we verbally abuse my parents in the morning, please?"

James sighed. "I hate them," he said quickly, then added, "yeah, all right, sure.."

A silence passed.

"Andromeda's getting married," came Sirius's voice through the dark.

James gasped. "What?"

"I don't mind as much as I thought I would," said Sirius quietly. "Y'know..I sort of..want her to be happy. And it's not like I'll never see her again, really..so.." He smiled. "I think we're all gonna be all right."

"Yeah," said James, smiling, and he meant it, "yeah, we're all gonna be just fine."

* * *

**Well, happier..**

**So this isn't strictly the end of the sadness. Of course it's not as perfect as James says; there'll be some awkward moments, but chiefly, everything's gonna be okay now :)**

**You have _no idea _how _insanely happy I was _to be over with the extreme sadness. I'm sick of it, honestly. Not that there's not more ahead - I have quite a bit planned -evil laugh-**

**WHY AM I UPDATING You may ask! I mean I never update. The answer is IT'S SNOWING AAAAAAAAGH IT'S SNOWING IT'S REALLY REALLY SNOWING! YAY YAY YAY!  
**

**That's all. OFF TO EAT BREAKFAST BYE.  
**


	54. September 1st, 1973

**A/N: HEY YOU GUYS I'M BACK! I basically took a month long hiatus for NaNoWriMo ****which I probably should've told you about, y'know, _before I took a month long hiatus. _But, alas, here is a chapter. It is either awful or good, I haven't decided yet. But it has Regulus in it! Yay! Regulus!**

* * *

Chapter Fifty Four

September 1st, 1973

"MOOOOOOOOOOONY!"

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOONY'S CAAAAAAT!"

"You guys – YOU GUYS – IF YOU DON'T LET GO OF ROMULUS HE'S GOING TO – "

"ARGGHHHHHHH! MOONY YOUR CAT IS EVIL! OWWWWWWWW – OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

"I did warn you.."

Sirius peeled the angry cat off his face, looking highly put out. "That thing needs some _manners,_" he said angrily.

James was laughing hysterically. "AND I SAID REMUS WAS GONNA GET KILLED BY HIS CAT," he gasped.

Remus rolled his eyes. "You two. Will never change."

"Ever," said James cheerfully. "Even through turmoil and war and great horror, I come out absolutely undifferent."

"Undifferent is not a word," said Remus, taking his cat in his arms.

"Where's Peter, anyway?" asked Sirius, looking around Platform 9 ¾.

"Late, as usual," said Remus, grinning. "What else is new?"

"Hey guys!" Peter ran up to his friends.

"Peter!" Great happiness ensued.

"You're _very _late," observed Remus.

"No, really, Captain Obvious," muttered Sirius. Remus held up his cat threateningly.

"Sorry, my mum wasn't letting me go," said Peter cheerfully. "So, how are you guys?"

"Much better than expected," muttered Remus in Peter's ear, eyes flickering to James, who pretended not to see.

"So, Sirius," said James, a bit louder than strictly necessary, "Regulus is starting this year, isn't he?"

"Yep," said Sirius, looking slightly uneasy. His eyes flickered over to his parents, who were giving Regulus an extended goodbye. "I'm sort of – sorry, that I didn't get to spend any time with him this summer..I hope..he doesn't get..oh, let's talk about something else."

"Pirates," suggested Peter.

They talked earnestly about pirates until the clock struck eleven, while struggling with their bags, and while staggering down the Express's corridors. Suddenly Sirius dropped all his bags on Remus's foot.

"ARGH," yelled Remus angrily.

"Oh this is _not _going to be done," said Sirius angrily, apparently to himself. "Guys, I'll meet up with you in a minute. This I must do."

He strode off down the other end of the corridor.

James dropped his bags on Remus's foot.

"ARGH AGAIN," yelled Remus angrily.

"He may or may not be going to get himself killed and/or kill someone else," said James. "So, I'd best follow him. Meet ya guys in a sec."

"Why would he get himself killed?" called Peter after James as he followed Sirius.

James turned. "He's _Sirius._"

"True say," relented Peter after a moment.

James caught up with Sirius and poked him in the back. "What are you – "

Sirius ignored him. He shoved open the door of the compartment he was in front of and glared in.

James immediately understood his friend's anger. Sitting in the compartment were several Slytherins from their year – Avery, Macnair, even Snivellus – a few twelve year old Slytherins – and a few very small people who looked liked eleven year olds and had the slimy, proud air of wanna-be Slytherins – and, sitting in the corner, looking highly nervous, Regulus.

"Regulus," said Sirius roughly, his voice loud and slightly intimidating. "Need to talk to you. Now."

Regulus looked around at nothing in particular, then, looking scared to death, stood up and walked over to his brother. Sirius slammed the door.

"Reg, what are you doing sitting with these people?" he growled.

Regulus looked scared but, for the first time, defiant. "Well you went off with your friends," he said boldly. "Where else was I supposed to sit?"

"You could've come find me. You could've sat with some more humanish people. God you could've gone and sat with Narcissa! What are you doing sitting with _these _people!"

"Narcissa sits with the same type of people!"

"Yeah well at least they're not _Snivellus! _These people are bad! Evil! Not good at all! Come on, you can sit with me."

"No," said Regulus angrily. "I'm staying here."

"Reg," said Sirius, a note of pleading appearing in his voice for the first time. "Please, Reg, come with with me."

"_No._"

Fury, pain, and a considerable amount of more fury flicked across Sirius's face so quickly it was impossible to decipher one expression from the other. "Fine," he snarled. "See if I care." He shoved open the door, pushed Regulus in, and turned to leave –

when he was hit square in the back by a Trip Jinx.

He fell to the ground, to the raucous laughter of the Slytherins or soon to be Slytherins. He got up slowly, wand clutched tightly, and turned to see Snape, holding his wand and smiling smugly.

Everything happened very quickly for a few seconds. It was a mad rush of hexes and yells and running away. James got in on it almost immediately, as did Avery, and soon everyone else had cleared out of the way and the four were throwing wild hexes at each other.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, two hands seized the back of James's shirt and the back of Sirius's cloak, and two more grabbed the cloaks of Snape and Avery. Remus dragged his friends away at the same time as Regulus dragged his away.

The two Black brothers' eyes met, and they knew that no matter what would happen, after this, the nights of fears shared and nightmares erased and conversations well into three in the morning were long gone. They had parted ways – and for that moment, for that millisecond, when two sets of grey eyes locked onto one another, they understood that they had gone their separate ways, and perhaps they nodded a fraction, a nod of goodbyes, before snarling ferociously and leaving each other.

–

"You two," said Remus when they had reached their compartment at last, "are IMPOSSIBLE."

"Well I couldn't very well let my little brother fraternize with the evildoers without _some _sort of intervention," grumbled Sirius, flopping down onto a seat.

"You didn't have to hex anyone," pointed out Remus, sinking into a seat across from him.

"They started it," grumbled James. "Slimy Snivellus got Sirius when his _back _was turned, I mean the _nerve –_ "

"You pranked him with his back turned last year loads of times the past two years," pointed out Remus.

"I don't care," said Sirius angrily. "That's not the point anyways. The point is that my _brother _was with him – my own _brother, _for crying out loud!"

"Well, he's taken his own path, Sirius," said Remus, uncharacteristically gently. "You did all you could. When it comes right down to it, it's just him. And you know he'll do what's right in the end."

"Maybe," said Sirius after a moment. "Probably. So pirates."

The rest of the trip passed merrily, all thoughts of Regulus and Death Eaters forgotten, and deeply centered on pirates, whether or not it was a good idea to charm "pirate" onto Snivellus's face, pirates vs. ninjas, rocks, evil cats, Dumbledore, and a whole host of other things.

At one point in conversation, the subject of classes came up. All four of them were taking Care of Magical Creatures. Remus was also taking Arithmency, Peter was taking Divination, and James and Sirius were both taking Muggle Studies. Everyone was entering their classes with a certain amount of trepidation, but also planned to make, in general, the most of the year.

"First year was all right," Remus was saying as the train slowed down, "second year was _insane, _but third year should be good, I think. I mean we've handled the worst of all things and we all came out all right, so I think we can take anything thrown at us now."

It was the first time any of them had referenced what had happened over the summer, and it didn't matter. Remus was right. They could handle anything, now – fires and floods and fights and death, because they were Marauders, and they were kings.

–

The Sorting was mostly uneventful, because Regulus came first and so the worst was over in the beginning. As most people suspected, he was Sorted into Slytherin – although it did take a full minute. When the Hat lingered on his head, only James saw Sirius tense with hope, and when the word "SLYTHERIN!" reverberated around the Hall, only James saw Sirius's face flicker with anger and frustration (and possibly sadness?) before quickly reverting to norm.

They sat through about a hundred new entrees, and when 'Zor, Netta' was finally Sorted into Gryffindor, to raucous applause, heaps and heaps of food appeared on the table, to which no one was shy about. They immediately began wolfing it down.

"Real food," Sirius moaned in delight. "Oh, how I loathe Muggle dinners."

"Sirius," said James through a mouthful of mashed potatoes, "I know I owe you and all but compared to this you really can't cook."

Sirius was unable to answer this, as he was struggling with what looked like a whole turkey.

"Disgusting," came a voice. James looked up and found himself looking into bright green eyes.

He dropped his fork, his spoon, and baked potato at once, and in his haste to get them off the floorhe knocked his chair into Sirius's and they both went tumbling into Remus, all the while James tried madly to flatten his hair.

Lily was laughing her head off when all three of them managed to get most of their dinner and themselves upright once more. James either didn't see or pretended not to see Sirius and Remus glaring at him.

Lily collected herself. "Seriously," she said, smiling, "you guys are gross."

"Oh are we, Lily?" said James, grasping a chance at sanity and something to do with dignity, patting his hair down. "Well um you know I do have my good moments when I'm not like hexing your best friend um not that I do that all the time I mean I do but I really shouldn't've brought it up but now that you mention it you could do for a change in best friends I mean you're best friends with Snivellus argh I mean Snape well his name is kind of stupid I mean Severus means grumpy in Latin DID YOU KNOW THAT? I did because my mum made me take Latin for three years and did you know that a lot of spells are from Latin and that um um spoon are ACTUALLY FORKS in DISGUISE I mean what I don't know _where _that came from it's just that I have, um..I have the _plague.. _and I'm delirious and and the basic point is you _shouldn't be friends with people who's name means grumpy in Latin and _– "

"Shut up, Potter," said Lily, smile disappearing. "Honestly, every time I try to have a civil conversation with you, you turn into a jab at Severus. Why don't you just leave him alone, anyways?"

And she scooted away to sit with Marlene McKinnon.

James seemed to wilt slightly as he watched her leave. "Well I don't think that went well," he said, apparently to himself.

He turned to Sirius, Remus, and Peter, who were grinning evilly.

"What are you three grinning at?" he grumbled while half-heartedly chewing at a piece of chicken.

"Someone," Sirius told Remus casually, "is completely madly in love with someone else."

"Is that so?" said Remus, thoughtfully nibbling on a tiny piece of steak. "How very interesting. Would you say that this someone is making it completely obvious and the second someone probably knows and the first someone is a bit of a blithering idiot?"

"Yes," jumped in Peter, "although the first someone is also quite funny when blithering."

"Shut UP," growled James, going bright red as all three of his friends smirked in precise coordination.

"Oh come on," said Remus, in a quiet voice, which James appreciated with all of his soul, "you _obviously _fancy her, I mean it's so _clear,_ even _Peter _can pick it up.."

"Hey!"

"I do NOT!"

"Do so."

"Do not."

"Do _s-o._"

"When're you gonna ask her out?"

"When're you gonna get married?"

"What're you gonna name the first kid?"

"Who's gonna be godfather?"

"Me, duh."

"No, I am!"

"No, I am!"

"SHUT UP," whisper-yelled James as Lily glanced over at them, eyes full of distaste.

The rest of dinner passed in a similar fashion, until at last the last plates of treacle tart disappeared and Dumbledore stood up.

Everyone quieted down immediately. Silence reigned for a few moments while Dumbledore looked over Hogwarts.

"Hello, and welcome to another year!" he said, voice booming. "I hope you have all enjoyed our food, and that your heads are entirely empty and ready to be filled up again!"

He proceeded to go over what he did every year: Quidditch tryouts, Filch's list, the usual rundown.

"..The six hundred and seventh item, Mr. Filch tells me, is quite the most important, so it would be wise to go and see what it is," he finished up, a twinkle in his blue eyes. "Students are reminded the Forbidden Forest is to be avoided entirely, and Mr. Slughorn has asked me to tell you that graffiti is entirely illegal, something that I daresay slipped my mind last year."

His eyes slipped in the direction of the Marauders, who grinned guiltily.

"I would also," said Dumbledore, his voice growing rather more strong, "like to remind you all that Lord Voldemort is still going strong."

All the air in the room disappeared rather quickly. A rather odd expression came across James's face.

Sirius's eyes flickered to Regulus and back.

"Everything said last year is in full effect this year," Dumbledore went on. "No student is to be outside after hours. No student is to be wandering the hallways after curfew. Trips to Hogsmeade are still planned, but extreme caution will be exercised at all times.."

James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter perked up at this despite themselves. Somewhere along the line of the mad summer, they'd all managed to get their permission slips signed, even Sirius, who'd sent it to Andromeda at the last minute begging for her signature, which she gave.

Dumbledore finished speaking about the security measures and there was silence for a few moments. His eyes wandered around the hall, brushing on Remus, then fixing at James for a moment.

"As we all know," he said, voice somehow louder and more gentle than ever, "there were a number of deaths this summer, as there are always. However..two of those deaths hit rather hard to this school."

The silence following was the heaviest anyone had heard in a long time.  
"One," rumbled Dumbledore, "was the death of Thomas Tanarm, our Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. We all know the truth, there is no need to repeat it..a minute of silence."

Remus closed his eyes and tried to rein in the unfeasible fury he felt when the name was uttered. _He was a werewolf, _he reminded himself silently, _he was a werewolf and he wasn't right in the head, he didn't know what he was saying.._

_I'm a werewolf too, _came an angry voice in his head.

He battled with himself for the entire minute of silence, until Dumbledore's voice broke it.

"The second death.." he hesitated.

James's stomach plummeted.

"Mr. Potter," Dumbledore's voice rang out, "the father of..James Potter, a third year in this school, was killed by Death Eaters..for reasons.." Dumbledore paused.

McGonagall shot him a look.

"..unknown," finished Dumbledore.

Every eye in the hall swiveled towards James, who was staring firmly at the table.

"Another minute of silence, if you would," said Dumbledore quietly.

The minute was rather uncomfortable this time around, particularly as James, who everyone thought would be all dramatic and cry or somethinghad, in fact, quite finished grieving over the summer and didn't really have anything to do. He decided all he could do was respect his father's memory, at this point.

_So Dad, _he thought in the general direction of the sky, _respect is given. _He saluted.

When the silence was broken, Dumbledore finally introduced the latest Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher as Professor Khraab. He was a short, round man, with wire-framed glasses and a cheerful smile, which gave everyone a bit of hope. He didn't look bad at all.

Finally, everyone was sent off to their dormitories, and when Remus, Peter, James, and Sirius burst into their own and collapsed on their beds, their minds were swimming with all the information Dumbledore had just given them, with predictions of the future and processions of the past, but they were tired and they were home, so they fell asleep without speaking.

* * *

**So, there you go. Everything is pretty much back to normal. Next up - Khraab! Oh, and if you speak the language I speak, you will know Khraab's true intentions. - cackles evilly - Because his name means..something.. go look it up! Oh, and then review!**


	55. Old Friends and New Enemies

Chapter Fifty Five

Old Friends and New Enemies

The first day of third year began with a great deal of rain and thunder, and that did quite a bit to dampen the spirits of everyone in the dormitory.

The thunder woke everyone up at five a.m, which was significantly earlier than everyone would like to get up.

"This is _much _earlier than I'd like to get up," muttered James.

"Such is l-l-l-l-life," tried Remus philosophically, although the effect was somewhat ruined as the word 'life' was tangled with a yawn.

A clap of thunder struck. Romulus, who had been sleeping peacefully on the end of Remus's bed, sprung up with a furious "_Mrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeooooow!_", and went on a mad rampage throughout the room for a few seconds before finally jumping beneath Remus's covers. He sleepily stuck his arm under the sheets and stroked his cat.

"Gosh, he could rival you, Sirius," observed James.

"Oh, shut up," grumbled Sirius, who was clearly not impressed with the weather. "Rain is stupid and anyone who likes it should be fined ten thousand Galleons."

"I like rain," mumbled Peter. "I just don't like it when it wakes me up."

"Does anyone?" asked Remus rhetorically.

"No," said James flatly.

The four finally climbed out of bed at about half past six. They got dressed slowly, followed by a slight panic in which Peter couldn't find his toad, Tommy, and accused Romulus of eating him, which Remus denied, saying Romulus was a nice cat and wouldn't eat anything, which was something of a lie as Romulus regularly caught Hogwarts's rats. By the time Tommy was located under Sirius's bed, it was quarter past seven.

The Marauders went down to the common room and sat in sleepy silence in front of the fire for a few minutes.

"Well," said Peter at last, "third year."

"Professor Khraab seems all right," suggested James.

"I didn't like him," said Sirius.

"You don't like anyone," said Remus untruthfully for the sake of an argument.

"I do too," said Sirius, affronted. "I like Andromeda..James's mother..Peter's toad.. Flitwick..but I don't like Khraab. He seemed shifty."

"_Everyone _seems shifty to you," threw back Remus.

"Your face is shifty," said Sirius.

James and Peter sighed in unison.

–

They went down to breakfast at eight, mainly because James and Peter couldn't stand Remus and Sirius's bickering after a while. Splendidly spectacular scrumptious food was already laid out on the table, and for the better part of an hour James and Sirius listened to Remus and Peter rather than spoke.

Remus and Peter finished eating well before the other two, and they talked mildly about the weather, and how they thought Professor Khraab would be, and due retaliation if he was anything like Tanarm.

"I don't actually feel bad about hating him," said Remus at one point, about Tanarm. "Not anymore."

Peter raised his eyebrows. "Really? Not at all?"

Remus opened his mouth, then paused. "I don't know," he said contemplatively. "I mean, I guess he was a bit messed up in the head, and maybe he didn't know what he was saying, but..I dunno. He was a right prat."

Sirius swallowed for what was possibly the first time in forty five minutes. "Well," he said decidedly, "in any case, Moony, if _this _guy is anything like Tanarm, we are not going to _lay down and take it._"

"You guys didn't exactly lay down and take it with Tanarm," said Remus dryly. "If I remember rightly, we got Gryffindor into the negatives of points. On the first day."

"Yes, well," said Sirius dismissively, "that's in the past. We're going to be a _tad _more subtle this year."

James cackled. "Khraab," he said evilly, "will not know what hit him."

Remus and Peter looked at each other. "Er," said Peter carefully, "what, exactly, did you guys _do _when we weren't there over the summer?"

"Well for most of it," explained James, "I was a bit out of it. But when I came round in the end, we spent the last two or three days studying!"

Peter looked at James suspiciously. "_Really?_"

Remus looked at James wearily. "Studying what?" he asked resignedly.

"The prank book you gave us way back in first year," interrupted Sirius cheerfully. "Remus, I'm surprised you didn't keep that book for yourself, it's _golden._ We're still not quite done."

Remus hit his head on the table several times. "Why – why – why – why – _why,_" he repeated, gritting his teeth, speaking every time his head touched the table.

"Because you're crazy," said Peter consolingly. "Have some bacon."

"We'd best be off, really," said James casually, standing up and tugging Sirius along. "We have things to do."

Remus opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again, sighed resignedly, and had some bacon.

–

Sirius and James scrambled back into the Great Hall fifteen minutes before the end of breakfast and began talking innocently about the weather.

Remus glared at them. "What. Did. You. Do."

"Well," said James after a moment of silence, "we _did _have to get back at Snape."

Remus sighed. "Please just..just don't tell me any more. Just..just don't."

–

A bit later, while James and Sirius were still evilly planning away and Remus was lamenting the fate of everyone, forever, someone tapped James on the shoulder.

He turned around, and promptly dropped his bacon on Remus's head (he had laid it on the table in his woe.) "Oh hi Ev-Evans!" he cried. "Uh, how are you? Is that – yeah, yeah, how was your – um, night, no, did you sleep? I mean did you well sleep? I mean –"

"I just wanted to say," said Lily, looking highly uncomfortable, "is that I'm sorry about your dad."

An inexplicable range of emotions crossed James's face, only to be replaced with one of careful blankness.

"Well – uh," he began, and Sirius sighed. His friend was _really _bad at this.

"Well," said James, apparently at a complete loss for words. "Um. Thanks. I mean. No. That's not what I mean at all! I mean I do miss my dad and all but y'know I mourned a lot over the summer so you didn't really have to but _that was not what I meant to say _wait no I didn't mean – "

"He means thank you," cut in Sirius.

Lily looked extremely confused, but she nodded. "Okay, then," she said in a baffled voice. "Uh..my friend is..I need to go..Transfigure a...bye!"

She hurried away. James groaned and buried his face in her hands.

Sirius looked as though he was trying extremely hard not to laugh. He patted his friend on the shoulder. "James, m'boy, you need some serious help."

"With what?" questioned Peter, also looking quite amused despite the circumstances.

"_Life,_" Remus answered gloomily, plucking bacon out of his hair.

Despite himself, James began to laugh.

They were deterred momentarily as a barking voice came from behind them. "Course lists! Course lists! Third year, fourth year, and fifth year, here, first, second, sixth, seventh there.."

"That doesn't make any sense," said Peter as the Marauders stood up and walked towards the voice – it belonged to who appeared to be the new Prefect, Jason McLaggen. "First years, second years, and third years should be in one spot."

"Maybe this McLaggen kid _has _no sense," suggested Sirius quietly as they approached said McLaggen.

Certainly he didn't look very nice, which may have been the reason Sirius suggested his lack of sense. He was very large and slightly intimidating looking. He wasn't speaking so much as ordering, and he was shoving schedules at people with unnecessary force. He also had very straight, perfect eyebrows which made Remus slightly suspicious. No one had eyebrows that perfect.

Peter tapped McLaggen on the shoulders. "Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black and James Potter, please," he said politely.

McLaggen looked down at the Marauders with distaste. "Here," he said after a moment, shoving four crumpled pieces of paper at them. "Hey.." His eyes roved up and down James. "You're the kid whose dad got killed?"

"What's it of your business?" snapped Sirius before James could respond.

McLaggen focused on Sirius. "I wasn't talking to you, Black," he said roughly. "Go join the rest of your snakes, why don't you."

For a moment, both James and Sirius looked downright dangerous. That was when Remus decided his first day of third year was _not _going to start with a murder by his two best friends, and hastily jumped in.

"Shut it, McLaggen," Remus said calmly. He grabbed Sirius and James by the wrists and dragged them away. Again.

"WHY," burst out Sirius when they had returned to the Gryffindor table, "didn't you let me _take that boy apart?_"

"Because he's two years older than you, ten times as strong, and it's illegal," said Remus tiredly. "Look, prank him, hex him, I don't care, but not today and not now."

"He is an IDIOT," argued James. "The way he talked to me – _kid whose dad died – _ARGH, I hate him – "

"I know you do," said Remus quietly, "but now is not the time. After all, it says very clearly on the section marked "Enemies" in _Pranks, _to _never do what your enemies expect you to._" He looked at them with a small smile on his face.

James and Sirius looked at each other slowly and smiled.

"Anyway," said Remus, looking over his schedule, "today looks all right. Transfiguration first – " Sirius groaned loudly "oh come on, it's all right – then elective one; we all have Care of Magical Creatures – then Defense Against the Dark Arts, lunch, Charms, and Potions."

"What a terrible first day back," said Sirius mournfully.

"Care of Magical Creatures might be fun," said Remus fairly, "and Defense could be all right. Charms is always good – "

"For the clever ones, sure," muttered Peter indignantly.

Just then, the bell rang – it was just only heard over the prominent thunder – and there was a general mound of people rushing towards the door to start another year.

* * *

**Hello, lovelies! Gosh, it's been a whole year since I updated this.**

-**evil smirk-**

**Anyway, not much to say - more on Khraab in the next chapter, as well as some...other things.. -cackles- Mwahahahahahah! Review, lovelies!**


	56. On Hawaii, Khraab, and Deep Thoughts

**A/N: Hello guys. Potterride made me put this up because she is at my house and she said that I had to put it up and apparently she is the boss of me.**

**Sigh. Review, to appease her? Oh, and there's a Tom Felton reference halfway in for you mega-fans :P**

Chapter Fifty Six

On Hawaii, Khraab, and Thinking

There was a certain comfort, Peter decided, in knowing that no matter what happened, Transfiguration would always be the same. Even after a summer that such radical changes had gone down – well, James was still _pretty _much the same, but in principle, pretty much radical changes had gone down – McGonagall still looked at them severely over her glasses, lectured coldly, and reprimanded without exceptions.

Unfortunately, the fact that it never changed created the fact that he was still terrible at it.

"When am I ever going to need to know how to Transfigure a shoe into a coat hanger," he muttered angrily. "When am I ever going to need a _coat hanger?_"

"Well," said Remus sensibly, "obviously, when you have a coat, and nowhere to hang it." He zapped the shoe in front of him, and it grew very skinny.

Peter sighed. "I'll never wear a coat again," he declared.

"Well," said Sirius sensibly, "you'll freeze. This is England." When he tried the spell, the shoe flipped over and grew a handle.

"I'll move to Hawaii," said Peter after a moment.

"Ha – wa – ii, under-neath a p – alm tree, in Ha – wa – ii, that's where you'll f – i – n – d me," muttered James under his breath.

"What?" asked Peter.

James shrugged. "I heard Lucius Malfoy muttering it the other day," he said as he zinged the shoe in front of him into a coat hanger.

"How do you do that?" groaned Peter, poking fruitlessly at his shoe.

"You have to kind of move your wrist like _faaaayaaaaaaat.._" The conversation delved into Transfiguration talk, and was thereafter uninteresting.

–

Care of Magical Creatures was not interesting nor uninteresting; rather, they didn't do much, but what they did was not strictly boring, although it wasn't something any of them would do, generally, by choice. Professor Kettleburn seemed fairly normal, and the first class only consisted of them filling out a form-type thing about why they had signed up for the class, what they hoped to gain from it, a short quiz on general knowledge of magical creatures, and a variety of other things.

Defense Against the Dark Arts, however, was an entirely different matter altogether.

–

When the four poked their heads into the Defense room, the first thing any of them noticed was that the room had been painted. In the days of the past two teachers, the walls had been white, the same as the rest of the school.

However, now the room was a pale gold. It was a cheerful color, like the sun on a warm summery day. Khraab was sitting at his desk, studying a stack of papers, when they peered in.

"Oh, hello!" he said cheerfully. He had an accent that was definitely not British. Remus thought he sounded a dash Irish. "Come on in, this is the third year Defense room."

Sirius hung back, watching as Remus, James, and Peter filed into the room. He watched, almost suspiciously, for a moment, before walking in and cautiously sitting down next to James.

Khraab didn't say anything as the rest of the class filed in, but he leaned against the chalkboard and watched them all with an air of boyish excitement.

Remus couldn't help to be suspicious. Defense teachers were _never _this nice.

In any case, he decided, it was good that they didn't have class with the Slytherins this year. Even the best class could be foiled by those snakes. Instead, they shared the class with Ravenclaws, who were nice, for the most part.

Remus and Peter were sitting next to each other, James and Sirius in front of them, and the four of them were discussing pirates once again when Lily Evans walked in and sat next to Remus.

"Hello, Remus," she greeted the boy, taking out five quills and laying them carefully on her desk.

Sensing a great deal of trouble, Remus smiled at Lily and turned quickly back to James. "Shut up shut up shut up," he growled under his breath.

James was not smiling. "How come she says hello to him, and not me?" he demanded, angrily albeit quietly.

"A-ha," said Sirius, satisfied. "Proof right there."

"It is not proof," said James in a dignified tone. "I am just curious, that's all."

Peter made a noise that could or could not be words that his mother would probably stick soap in his mouth for.

Before further discussion on Lily Evans could be held, Khraab clapped his hands.

"Well!" he said, looking around at the now silenced room. "Another year at Hogwarts! My eighth, this'll be, after seven at Hogwarts, and all of your third. I have a great deal planned for this year, how to train you against the Dark Arts, how to keep away from the Dark Arts..but before I begin.."

He swung round so he was this side of his desk and looked around at the class. He met every child's eye before focusing on the room as a whole.

"People are going to try to shield you," Khraab said, his voice quiet but echoing around the room. "But I was never into that. So I'm going to tell you straight-out. We are at war. It is, as for now, mild, but give it a few years and we'll have mass murders every other week. And once you leave school – maybe even before then – you're going to be faced with some very difficult choices."

Khraab looked around. There was silence for a time.

"I can't decide anything for you," he said, voice growing louder. "But what I can tell you.._don't go over the dark. _No matter how tempting – and it will be tempting – but I beg of you all to remember, to _think.._think of how much the Dark has already destroyed. The deaths over the summer – " His eyes flicked to James for a moment, then returned to seeing the class at large – "have hurt so many families, caused so much pain..I want you to_ remember. _And I want you all to remember – never, ever, _ever – _no matter how tempting, no matter what they promise you, no matter who's died or been injured or how badly you think this is a good cause – that the Dark is Dark. And that it always, always will be."

After Khraab's little speech, there was a long silence. Sirius still looked somewhat uneasy, but everyone else in the class looked extremely impressed.

"Blimey, this guy _knows_," whispered James. Remus agreed.

Khraab let the lingering silence fade impressively, then clapped his hands. "Well! We have quite a lot to do today, so let's head right into it!"

He picked up the register. "Angle, Marina?"

"Present."

"Areedi, Kayla?"

"Present."

"Bl.." Khraab trailed off and a look of what could be terror came across his face. "Bl – _Black?_"

There was a silence.

James swore under his breath.

Remus sighed._ Why, why, why..and I was starting to like this man.._

Sirius's entire body was tense. "Yes, _Black,_" he said, louder than strictly necessary. "Have you got a problem with that, _sir?_"

Khraab looked nothing less than terrified. "B-_Black,_" he repeated, voice shaking.

"Thank you, now I know my name," said Sirius, not bothering to keep the anger out of his voice. "And my name is _Sirius, _thanks very much."

Khraab staggered to his seat and collapsed into it. "You're a Black," he repeated.

"Thank you for enlightening me," snapped Sirius. "I had absolutely no idea of my last name. I must remember to give you a fruit basket for letting me know."

Peter groaned under his breath. Remus agreed. _The first day, and that's twenty points down the drain._

_ Again._

_ Are we _ever _going to get a normal Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?_

But oddly enough, Khraab didn't say anything about points. Instead, he steadied himself and stood shakily up. "C-Canapp, Marina," he managed to say.

Remus tried to pay attention to the rest of the lesson, but anger was crackling under his skin. He vaguely understood that they were learning about Grindylows, and also that despite Khraab's apparent goodness that they thought so much of before role call, he was really quite a boring teacher. He read from the book, asked questions, and attempted to engage the class in discussion, but the way he explained the material was so flat, there was nothing to discuss.

When the bell finally rang, Sirius was the first to leave the classroom. He stood up so quickly he knocked over his chair and stormed out without his books.

Remus sighed and bent to straighten up Sirius's chair while James ran after him and Peter picked up his books.

"You're turning into James, Moony," said Peter, grinning.

Remus realized his hand was in his hair, running through it. "Lovely," he said dryly, evoking laughter from Peter. The two hurried out of the room to find Sirius and James.

–

James tracked Sirius down halfway to the Great Hall.

"Hello, Sirius," he said cheerfully, falling into step with his friend.

"Hello," said Sirius without looking up.

Remus and Peter sped around the corner and fell into step with James and Sirius. "Hello, Sirius," said Remus cheerfully.

"Hello," said Sirius without looking up.

"Here're your books," said Peter helpfully, holding them out.

"Thank you," said Sirius without looking up.

"You're welcome," said Peter cheerfully.

Sirius walked faster and consequently left his friends behind.

"Well, that does not help matters in any way whatsoever," said Remus to no one in particular.

"Why can't we _ever _get a vaguely normal Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?" James wondered aloud as they hurried to the Great Hall to find Sirius.

"It would be against the job description," said Remus grimly as they reached the Great Hall.

"Job description," said James, as if quoting. "Must be horrible and/or boring and/or cruel, and have some sort of prejudice."

"There!" said Peter suddenly, pointing to the very edge of the Gryffindor table, where Sirius was sitting alone, apparently stabbing a grape.

"Hello, Sirius," said James a few moments later, sliding into a seat next to his friend. Remus and Peter followed suit.

Sirius didn't say anything, but stabbed the grape harder.

"You know," said Remus pleasantly, "the grape never really did anything to you."

"Yes," snapped Sirius, "and I never did anything to Khraab, did I, and that _is not helping my situation whatsoever._"

James, Remus, and Peter exchanged looks.

Suddenly, Remus had an idea. "Right, Sirius," he said calmly, serving himself some treacle tart, "and I never did anything to Tanarm."

"And I didn't do anything to Lucius Malfoy," said Peter, cottoning on, "but he threatened to hex me for walking too slowly this morning."

James made an indistinct noise and then became rather interested in the table top. Remus thought he could figure what he was thinking about, but thought it best not to say.

"Sirius," Remus picked up, as James suddenly seemed rather..sad wasn't exactly the word, but his face was so determinedly void of emotion that Remus figured he couldn't be thinking of anything happy, "none of us ever ask for anything to happen to us, all right? And you.." He realized he had absolutely no idea where he was going with this point, and wondered faintly why they had decided to start it.

"Sirius," said Peter hesitantly, "what we're trying, and desperately failing, to say, I think, is that it's not your fault that this Khraab fellow is being such a right little prat, and.. it's not your fault that your.. family is who they are, y'know? And so.. you shouldn't be.. mad about this, because there's nothing you can do and.." He petered off.

"You just petered off," said Remus, amused.

Everyone glared at him. He quickly turned his face to solemn. "But anyway. Um, yeah, Sirius. You really shouldn't care about this."

Sirius sighed and stabbed the fork particularly viciously into the grape. "I _know,_" he grumbled. "Aren't I entitled to being mad about things, sometimes?"

"No," said Peter helpfully, helping himself to a second helping of everything.

"Not really," said James, looking up from the table at last, not quite smiling. "But we don't really care, either way. Don't think nothing of anything, Sirius, you're a Marauder. We're not _meant _to think.."

"Excuse me," said Remus delicately. "I think very much, thank you very much."

"Well, you're really only three quarters Marauder.."

"Ex_cuse _me? I am more Marauder than all three of you put together!"

"Oh, come on, you don't even _like _pranks!"

"Oh, I suppose it was my evil twin brother who gave you guys that prank book in first year."

"No, it was Romulus."

"My _cat?_ I didn't even _own _him back then!"

"That's what you think. You see, you've owned Romulus for seventeen years, but in a different _universe, _see.."

–

As James went off into a long winded rant about absolutely nothing, Remus argued with him, and Peter laughed merrily, Sirius's spirits couldn't help but lift slightly.

They were the Marauders, after all. And they could face anything.

_This year might not be perfect, _Sirius decided, _but.._

"WHAT DO SPACE PIRATES HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?" shouted Remus.

"Space pirates," Sirius jumped in in a business-like way, "have _everything to do with everything.."_

_ Ah, but who cares?_

* * *

**Review, lovelies, and go read my and potterride's prank story..please? Pretty please? .net/s/6829860/15/The_War_to_End_All_Wars Pleeeeeeease?**_  
_


	57. Muggle Studies

**Oh look. A chapter. :)**

* * *

Chapter Fifty Seven  
Muggle Studies

"She's kinda like rubies and emeralds, isn't she," said James softly, staring at Lily Evans as she talked and laughed with Marlene McKinnon on the other side of the Great Hall the next morning at breakfast.

"I thought you didn't fancy her," said Remus dryly, nibbling on bacon.

"I _don't,_" said James vehemently. "But she reminds me of rubies and emeralds."

Sirius choked. Peter pounded his back and he turned to James. "You can't not say a girl reminds you of rubies and emeralds and not fancy her," Sirius informed James. "It's against the _law._"

"Also," said Peter, swallowing his toast and wiping his mouth on a napkin, "you just shouldn't say that kind of thing in general. It's actually quite creepy."

James didn't say anything. He was still gazing at Lily with a look of utter adoration.

"Ah, James," said Remus, sensing a certain amount of trouble in the air, "Lily really doesn't, er, like you that much."

"Huh?" James snapped up. "Oh. Yeah. Lily? I know! I don't like her either! I just wonder..hey, look, the post!"

"Hooray," said Sirius, smirking before returning his attention to the cereal in front of him.

A letter landed on James's plate, a thick heavy package on Peter's plate, and the usual newspaper on Remus's.

Remus unfolded his newspaper and disappeared behind it and James tore open the letter. "From Mum," he said after a moment, face once more carefully blank of emotion. "Asking me how I am.."

"And of course I left my Arithmency book home," said Peter with a sigh as he tore open the package and retrieved his book. Everyone laughed.

"Your dad's in here, James," said Remus after a few minutes.

James looked up, startled. "What?"

"Yeah – a remembrance article by Ganius McKinnon."

"That's McKinnon's – " Sirius jerked his head down the table in the direction of Marlene and Lily " – grandfather, isn't it?"

"Yeah," said James, sadness whispering over his face. "They worked together at the Auror office together for quite awhile. I think he was his first mentor."

A not-exactly-comfortable silence descended upon the four. James's hand snaked up towards the cord around his neck and held the stone that was there.

"What else is going on, then?" asked Sirius, breaking the silence. "Any.."

"Two disappearances," said Remus quietly, setting his paper down, pain in his eyes. "Agatha Figg, mother of a teenaged Squib and married to a wizard, was gone when her family woke up. No news as of yet. William Michinson, eighteen year old son of Adrian and Annie Michinson from Bath, is also gone."

Peter sighed wearily. "It could be us next," he said, sounding as if he was carrying the world's weight on his shoulders. "It could be any of us, or our mothers, or our fath – "

Remus kicked him and he shut up.

James's face went determinedly blank yet again, but otherwise he made no mention that he had heard what Peter had said. "Well," he said slightly louder than usual, "what're our classes today, then?"

Remus looked at the course list. "First class is second elective," he announced. "So that'll be Arithmency for me, Divination for you, Peter, and.."

"Oh _blimey_,_" _said Sirius, eyes filling with glee. "Muggle Studies, James! Me and you, in a class, together – _without Moony!"_

"Oh YES!" cried James, ecstasy taking over his face. "Ha, ha, HA, Moony!"

Remus hit his head against the table. "That room," he said conversationally to his bread, "is going to _burn down._"

"Not necessarily," disagreed Peter. "I mean, what's the worst they can do?"

All three stared at him.

"Peter," said Remus in a helpless sort of voice, "they get up to enough insanity with me to tell them to shut up, or Silencioing them if necessary, et cetera. And without me, Peter, THEY ARE GOING TO BURN HOGWARTS DOWN."

"And it will be _glorious_," sang Sirius, helping himself to more bacon.

–

After breakfast, James and Sirius split apart from Remus and Peter and set off towards Muggle Studies, discussing at top speed exactly what mischief they would get up to over the course of the year.

"Who else do you think is going to be in our class?" asked James.

"I dunno – bunch of half-bloods, I s'pose, Muggleborns won't bother and ninety five percent of purebloods probably think they're too good for it.."

"Yeah, probably.."

A few minutes of idle conversation later, they reached the Muggle Studies room and cautiously let themselves in.

It was a queer little room, rather different from the other classrooms in Hogwarts. For one, there were oddly enlarged pieces of parchment all over the room with pictures of grinning children on them that said strange things like "You are amazing!" and "Shoot for the moon!" Instead of desks, there were five square tables with four chairs set around them, and on every one were mysterious quill-like devices and notebooks.

"Where _are _we?" whispered James, awed.

"This is seriously creepy," muttered Sirius. "Let's just find chairs.."

They chose the table nearest to the door, which could come in handy, and sat down next to each other. They were fairly early, so for a while they only talked and watched other students arrive.

"Yes, but Ithink we should figure out what the parchment is for _before _we – " James was saying, but he abruptly cut himself off.

"SIRIUS," he whispered urgently. "LOOK!"

Sirius turned to the door – and burst into a hysterical fit of laughter.

Lily glared at him before sitting down next to Marlene McKinnon. At the same table was Alexander McKinnon, Marlene's twin Hufflepuff brother.

"What is SHE doing here?" James hissed, hiding behind the notebook that was on his desk. "She's _Muggleborn!"_

"Maybe she wanted a different perspective," suggested Sirius, an evil grin on his face. "Aren't you _delighted? _The rubies and emeralds, after all.."

James hit him.

"Oh look," said Sirius after he'd finished moaning with pain, chastising James, complaining for a few minutes, and smirking evilly, "the professor."

Or she appeared to be, at least.

James had never seen a professor that had dressed like this: as if she was a student. On break. At Christmas. After the company had gone home.

She was wearing what appeared to be sweatpants and a yellow sweatshirt, and her hair was tied back with a bright blue hairtie. She was very short, and her tied back hair was light brown and very curly. She wore green-framed glasses. She had no wand on her person, and her arms were full of notebooks and the quill-like devices. She looked very young – she couldn't be older than thirty.

"Hello!" she said cheerfully.

James and Sirius looked at each other. Something was not right in this classroom.

"My name is _Miss _Burbage," said the alleged _Miss _Burbage. "I am twenty six years old and I have been in this position for five years now. I am Muggle born, and even after I realized my magical prowess, I continued to use Muggle objects and I lived a firmly Muggle lifestyle – I was never completely comfortable with the magical world!" She gave a nervous laugh.

James blinked.

"Ahem. Anyway. Of course, I've always loved Hogwarts, and Muggle Studies – naturally, naturally – was always quite my favorite class. So when I discovered that there was an opening for the job, I grabbed it as soon as I could. And I haven't regretted it for a day." She smiled.

No one knew quite what to say to this, so they settled for nodding their heads like they understood.

"Well!" Professor Burbage clapped her hands. "We have much to do today, so let's get straight down to it. First – introductions! I Do you know, in Muggle schools, on the first day of school, the first thing everyone does is go around and say their names?"

Lily raised her hand.

"Yes, Miss – " The teacher glanced at her role call. "Evans?"

"Ah, Professor Burbage," began Lily hesitantly, but Burbage cut her off.

"Please, Miss Evans, _Miss _Burbage – this is an entirely Muggle surrounding!"

"Er, yes, okay. Um, Miss Burbage, I went to Muggle school my whole life, and generally that's only if you've moved up to secondary school or something of that sort. And, ah, most of us know each other."

Burbage blinked. "All right, well, we're going to do introductions anyway," she said dismissively. "Everyone stand up and say your names, one at a time!"

"Do you know everyone in here?" whispered James to Sirius.

"Yep," whispered Sirius gloomily. "You?"

James sighed and nodded. "This is going to be a really, really long class."

–

That evening, the Marauders sat in the corner of the common room by the fire, kibitzing idly while doing their homework.

"Well, Arithmency is all right," said Remus matter-of-factly, putting his homework safely in his bag and picking Romulus up onto his lap. "It'll be difficult, but it sounds fairly challenging and enjoyable."

"Why is he using such big words?" asked James, scribbling away at something.

"I dunno," said Sirius, "he's Moony, what d'ya expect.."

"Divination is complete rubbish, though," said Peter gloomily. "Dunno why I even signed up for it. Ridiculous, really..how's Muggle Studies?"

"Terrible," groaned Sirius, running a hand through his hair. "The teacher is so weird, she's a witch, but she hates magic..gawsh, what're we gonna do, James?"

"Yeah," said James absently. His attention had, of course, wandered – to none other than (who else?) Lily Evans across the room.

Remus heaved a sigh as he released Romulus, who scampered off, presumably to eat mice. "Sirius, five Galleons he asks her out by the end of the year," he muttered.

"You're on," said Sirius out of the side of his mouth.

–

That night, as half the Marauders were sound asleep, James was, once again, lying awake in his bed. He could not sleep, for no apparent reason. It wasn't as if he had too much heavy thinking to do, not really.. he just couldn't bring himself to fall into slumber.

He thought about his dad for a little bit. He did miss him, with all his heart, but he didn't feel like he would collapse into little pieces anymore. Not _everything _was all right, he still missed him – he always would, of course – but he was okay, in general. He still felt like there was a little piece of him missing, but it wasn't a hole, a gap, a wound, it was more of a..reminder. Of things that had been, and of how things were. It was a quiet little space, and even though it was still there, it had healed.

After he'd finished thinking this through, his mind drifted around lazily, not settling on one topic and not sleeping, either.

He reached for the two way mirror on his headboard. "Sirius," he whispered into it.

Sirius's face appeared. "You realize we're in the same room."

James grinned. "This way's cooler."

Sirius laughed, but quietly so he wouldn't wake Remus or Peter. "Well, then?"

"Well what?"

"What d'you think of it all?"

James considered. "Muggle Studies will be awful," he said, "and, let's see, Charms and Transfiguration and Potions all sound about the same as usual.. annoying that we _still _have Potions with the Slytherins though, it's been like two whole years."

Sirius sighed. "Honestly, have they _not yet figured out _that _cauldrons will explode?"_

"Well, to be completely fair," said James, "it does make things a bit more interesting..when does that time delay spell go off anyway?"

"The one we put on yesterday at breakfast? Well, it was forty eight hours, so tomorrow, I suppose..poor Snivellus.." Sirius cackled.

James chortled. "Poor, indeed," he said.

The two were quiet for a moment. "How about Care of Magical Creatures," said Sirius. "You couldn't really get a thing from that first lesson.."

"Kettleburn has a reputation for being kind of weird," said James, "my cousin told me, but he seemed all right. Not like Khraab, though."

Sirius did not look pleased. "Khraab is a git," he said decidedly.

James shrugged. "Yeah, he is, but what the heck else is new," he pointed out. "Defense teachers just can't teach. And if they can they're just terrible. I highly doubt we will ever actually get a good one, y'know.. and none of them last more than a year, have you noticed that?"

"Yeah – I did! Y'know I thought our year was just kind of terrible but Meda told me that when she was in school, her teachers never stuck round either.."

"Really?"

"Yeah. How weird, innit?"

"_So _weird."

"So how much d'you wanna bet on the way _this _guy will go out?"

"Mmm.." James deliberated. "I'm not sure.. how's.. five galleons sound on.. him getting... well, the first one was sent to Azkaban and the second one died.. how did Andromeda's go, did she tell you?"

"One was fired, one resigned after a rumor got spread about him – that he was engaged to a Kappa, I think, and he was kinda weird and he didn't like teaching that much anyway – one fought with Peeves the whole time and eventually just left.. I'm not sure about the rest."

"Wish Filch had the same outlook on Peeves." They laughed.

"Hm..I think.." James pondered. "Okay, I'm putting five on him getting the sack. He's not that good of a teacher, is he?"

"All right, I'll put five on him quitting." Sirius grinned. "How will he stand to be in the presence of a Black for more than a year anyway?" He made a hideously terrifying face. "_We are all evil!"_

James looked, startled, into the mirror for a few minutes before they both collapsed – quietly as they could, which was not very quietly – into laughter.

"In all seriousness, though," said James, quieter, "he is an absolute right _git, _isn't he? I mean who _does _that.. what he did?"

Sirius shrugged. "I do, to be perfectly fair," he said fairly. "I mean I hate most Blacks..but I'm me so I don't count.. argh. Oh well, if Remus can get through it then I can, I s'pose.. I guess it's your turn next year, then, for a Defense teacher to hate you?"

"Well, you never know. It might be Peter's.. Gridley didn't like _anyone._"

"Whatever happened to Gridley?"

"I've no clue.. sent to Azkaban for improper use of Thestrals, was it? Now that I think of it, that's really weird.."

"Yeah, it is.. eh, I'm exhausted, James. I'll see ya in the morning – oh wait, I did some research on the secret thing about Moony last night!"

"Oh! What'd'you find?"

"That it's completely illegal and we'd be insane to try it."

"So you'd say.."

"All systems go."

"Deffo. D'you think it's time to clue Peter in?"

"Nah. Let's get the kinks worked out first.. but seriously, first let's sleep, I'm actually tired. Night."

"Night."

* * *

**From now onward, many antics in this story will be based off the math class I had this year, and the antics that went on. :P So if you ever think, hey, this _exact same thing happened in my math class!.._look for the quiet cackling girl in the corner.**

**Review, darlings! :)**


	58. Full Moons and Devious Plans

Chapter Fifty Eight

Full Moons and Devious Plans

"Hey Moony!"

"How are ya doin'?"

"Mmphharrgowaaaay.."

"_Shh, _guys! You're gonna give us away!"

"Where..are you guys..coming from..what are you even..go awaaay.."

"We're here," said James, proudly stepping out from beneath nowhere.

Remus shielded his eyes as Sirius followed James from similar nowhere, carrying a wand shining with what was clearly a recently cast lumos. Peter pulled the nothing – which Remus vaguely recognized as James's invisibility cloak – off his head, folded it up, and stuffed it into his bag before grinning at Remus and bouncing onto the end of his bed. "Hi, Moony!" he said brightly. "How was last night?"

His mind still fuzzy with exhaustion, Remus groaned and covered himself back up with his blanket.

Sirius carefully rolled it back. "Mooooooony?" he said curiously. "Are ya in there?"

"Noo," mumbled Remus. "Go awaaaay. I'm trying to sleeeeeeeeep."

"Your hair is really crazy," observed James, flattening his own down.

"Lily's not here to observe your glory, Potter," said Sirius dryly. James punched him.

"Yes," said Remus tiredly, only just registering what James had said, "yes, turning into a wolf has the tendency to mess up your hair.."

"Well, that's why we're here!" said James cheerfully. "TOOO make you feel BETTER because last night was your first transformation of the year! So we thought you might need some cheering up!"

"I need something," said Remus groggily, "and that is _sleep. _I broke my leg in three places last night. Three!"

"Argh," said Sirius, wincing. "Did she Heal it up?"

"Yeah, but it still hurts like mad," said Remus grumpily. "And my whole body feels like it's been through a torture machine from the 1880s or something. I am _currently dead, _okay? Please leave me alone."

There was a moment of thoughtful silence.

"We'll do that, then," spoke up Peter, "if it'll make you feel better."

"Yeah, we just want you to be all right, Moony," said James. Remus heard the note of anxiety in his voice and felt a faint stirring of guilt.

"We're sorry for bothering you," said Sirius in a surprisingly small voice. "Didn't want you to be _worse.._"

Remus did feel worse, mainly because his friends had gone out of their way and broken curfew and come to see him and all he'd done to shout at them. "No..guys.. thanks," he said wearily, closing his eyes again. "Really, it was really good of you to come see me."

He could feel their smiles. "No problem, Moony," said Sirius quietly. "Anything else we can do for you, then?"

Remus considered telling them to just go away, but really, he probably wouldn't be able to get back to sleep anyway at this point. "Nah," he said softly, "but you guys can stay here..if you'd like..if you want to. Not gonna get much sleep anyway..careful, though, Pomfrey has ears like a hawk, she'll break your faces one at a time if she catches you.."

He wasn't getting much sleep, so it might as well be nice to talk through the night instead.

"No problem, Moony!" said James brightly. "But listen, really, _anything _we can get you, all night, you tell us, okay? We don't have anywhere to be!"

"Asleep?" suggested Remus.

"Nope!"

"Hey, Moony," said Peter, a thought apparently occurring to him, "why won't you be able to fall back asleep?"

Remus sighed and shrugged, closing his eyes. "Dunno, Pete," he said. "I'm tired, all right – but I can't, see.. I sleep really terribly, after full moons.." He yawned. "Which is not good because every inch of my body is all, 'sleeeeeeeeeep' and my mind is just like.. 'nooooo..'"

James laughed. "Wow, your mind is kind of terrible."

Remus grinned wryly. "It doesn't appreciate being dissolved every month, let's just say that."

The four Marauders laughed quietly.

"It's okay, Moony," said Sirius nicely. "I'm not good at sleeping either."

Peter, however, was now intrigued despite himself. "But _why?_" he couldn't resist asking. "Why can't you sleep? D'you think there's any particular reason, or is it just how you _are? _Were you_ always _like this?"

"Well.." Remus considered the question. "Well, it's partially because – especially after a really bad full moon – I get..flashback dreams, sometimes."

"Flashback dreams?" questioned Peter.

"Shush, Peter," said Sirius.

"No, it's okay," said Remus. "I don't mind questions..well, not by you guys anyway, you know how to ask without being horrible about it at least. Flashback dreams – they're exactly what they sound like, but they are worse in practice. It's just – I don't, consciously, remember any of being a wolf, which would be really bad if I ever killed someone, or really _good, _the way you look at it.."

"You're never going to kill anyone," said Sirius fiercely. "Don't be silly."

Remus smiled. "But my _unconscious _mind is kinda a jerk, and it remembers things I'd really rather not remember, and so it did remember..I've lost myself. What am I talking about?"

"Your mind that is not your actual mind does stuff," supplied Peter.

"Oh. Okay. Erm, yeah, it does things like remember transforming into a wolf and ripping myself up and other things, while I'm sleeping. And let me say, it is _terrible. _That is the one blessing of losing my mind during..it." He bit his lip. "I don't have to remember. Until, of course, I sleep – not always, but it happens, particularly after the really bad ones, which last night kinda was. Which is one reason why I don't, generally, even try to sleep after full moon." He took a breath, and then, despite it all, smiled. "D'you know, that is the first time I have ever told anyone that."

His friends were quiet for a moment, immersing this.

"Wow," said Sirius. "That is absolutely horrible."

Remus shrugged. "I do what I can." He smiled again, a tiny one this time. "And..um..it does make it..better..to.."

"Rant about it," supplied James.

"Yep," said Remus.

"Well," said Peter, still thinking hard, "but what about the ones that _aren't _so bad? Can you sleep better after those?"

"Yeah, but not by much," explained Remus. "See, my mind..it's really tired out, by becoming a werewolf, but it's also kind of scared. As humans, our minds are generally rather dumb, so mine, my werewolf-y mind, has the odd notion that if I lose conscienceness once again, it will disperse again. It's all unconscious, of course. It takes me ages to get to asleep, and I sleep really badly anyway. So basically, after transformations, it is a lot better to be asleep than it is to be awake."

Everyone in the general vicinity mulled this over.

"Hey, Peter, how come you're so interested anyway?" asked James.

Peter flushed. "Oh, y'know," he mumbled.

"No, I don't," said James. "And I must say, I'm quite curious."

"Yeah, what's up, Pete?" asked Remus. "Planning on becoming a werewolf?"

Peter went red. "No," he muttered. "It's just..well..I was kind of terrible last year, at the beginning of last year, and I did..thinking. All through last year, and over the summer."

"That," said Sirius, "is a new one."

"Shut up, Sirius. Anyway, and I did thinking, a lot of it, and I decided, in the end, that I was an idiot and should learn more about werewolves so I could _stop _being such an idiot. But I guess it was kinda idiotic anyway, to ask you all those questions..right after your first full moon and all."

Remus smiled wanly. "Peter, don't worry about it, it's really good of you, actually. And it's not my _first, _I've been through about twenty at Hogwarts.."

Peter went red, again. "Well," he said.

"Well?" said Sirius.

Peter considered. "Nope, well's all I got."

They laughed, again.

"Peter, do you _ever _have anything else?" taunted James, and the three of them were off in a lovely chain of banter.

Remus shook his head, settled down onto his pillows, and smiled. There were a lot of things he was surprised at, that had surprised him in his journey through Hogwarts (_it's a dang good thing my friends aren't Legilimens because they would probably beat me up if they heard me refer to school as a journey, _he acknowledged), but what was the most pleasantly surprising, and what still hit him as a shock sometimes, was that he had made friends, good friends, real friends, and they knew who he was and they didn't care, and they were _interested in asking his questions about it. _It was crazy and he wondered sometimes if they were just doing it because they felt sorry for him, but then he and Sirius would engage in a two hour long back-and-forth insultfest, or he and James would spend two days discussing whether or not there was a point to Pygmy Puffs, or Peter would be genuine and kind and ask him questions like he was important enough to answer them, and he would just _know_.

"A very hibernating bear!" Sirius argued for what seemed to be no reason, but would probably have made sense if he'd cared to follow the conversation. Actually, it probably wouldn't.

Remus smiled, shook his head, and delved into the conversation. The rest of the night passed with happy banter and many a planned prank, and not once did any part of him hurt.

–

The next morning opened with an unearthly scream for the Hospital Wing.

"WHAT," came a bellow, "ARE YOU THREE DOING IN HERE?"

Sirius jolted awake. "Oh _blimey – _hello Madam Pomfrey! We're just, um – "

"Sleepwalking!" cried James, fumbling for his glasses and shoving them upside down just below his nose.

"Yes!" cried Peter, jumping up. "Sleepwalking! We were just – all three of us – and the common room – and oh, dear, we're late for classes! Goodbye!"

And without another word, they had bolted from the Hospital Wing.

Madam Pomfrey hovered dangerously over Remus. "What, Mr. Lupin," she breathed, reminding Remus inexplicably of a dragon, "were those three doing here?"

Remus hadn't slept at all, though his friends had dropped about ten minutes ago, one at a time, so he was at the stage of such exhaustion that he really didn't feel remotely tired anymore, but pretty much everything was peculiarly amusing. "Well, Madam Pomfrey," he said sleepily, curling up in his bed, "I suppose they were sleepwalking.."

He looked so sweet, lying there half-asleep, still scratched and his leg a little crooked, but looking so happy, that Madam Pomfrey couldn't help her anger wilting a little – but just a _little_. She tutted loudly. "I suppose they know, Mister Lupin?"

Remus smiled, closing his eyes. "Mm-hmm..and they came to come..see me..they're good, aren't – " he yawned, barely coherent now, "they're good..aren't they, Madam Pomfrey?"

Madam Pomfrey shook her head and hid her smile. "I could easily take a hundred points from Gryffindor.."

"Please don't," yawned Remus, wiggling around to make himself more comfortable and grimacing when he moved his leg. "They were just trying to make me feel a bit..better, weren't they?"

Madam Pomfrey sighed loudly. "Tell them not to do it again," she said finally, not sure why she was feeling so lenient as she went to fetch a potion for Remus.

Perhaps it was just how happy Remus had looked, she didn't think she'd ever seen him so happy. He looked grim as anything when he was with her, seemingly constantly about to break down but always holding himself just together – of course, turning into a beast for a night might do that to you, and, being a maternal woman, she couldn't help the feeling of pleasure that stemmed inside her when she saw him happy. Or maybe it was just that she rather liked James, Sirius, and Peter, as unruly as they were.

Or maybe it was the Gryffindor in her talking.

–

Remus made a face as he swallowed his potion. _Taste never goes away.._

"Right, Mr. Lupin," said Madam Pomfrey briskly, "that should help your leg and most of the other injuries a bit – heal them and take away the pain both. Now, get some rest." She walked away, her shoes clapping on the linoleum floor.

Remus smiled and curled up. As he leaned against his pillow, there was a crinkling noise. He reached behind his shoulder and found a small note, in Peter's round handwriting.

_Good luck with the flashback dreams, Moony!_

_ Get well soon :)_

His hand closed over the note and he smiled.

–

"Y'know," said Sirius to James as Peter got up to chuck his rubbish away, "that was a fine night and all, but don't you think there's a much simpler way to keep Moony okay?"

James raised his eyebrows. "Like perhaps having some animals along with him on full moons.."

They looked at each other and smiled.


	59. Of Transfiguration and Gollum

Chapter Fifty Nine

Of Transfiguration and Gollum

"This is _hard stuff,_" said James annoyedly as he sifted through the pages of an enormous old tome. "Like, _really hard. _And the directions are all in Latin or something. I can't even read this. What does_ insipid _even _mean?"_

"I think it means boring and dull, but I'm not sure," said Sirius, barely visible behind an even larger text. He heaved a sigh and slammed it shut. "Y'know what? We need to try something simpler. Something written for someone who was not Dumbledore's age."

James gave a frustrated sigh and slammed his own book shut with a noise that shook the beech tree. "But the thing is, no book for our age would actually give _directions _on what we're trying to do_, _would it?"

The day that had begun so terrifyingly had passed quite normally. Lessons were over. Peter had detention with Filch for doodling on a desk and Remus was still in the Hospital Wing. James and Sirius had gone to the library, and, to Madam Pince's extreme suspicion, checked out two elephant-sized books on everything to do with Animagi. The trouble was, they might as well just have asked an elephant to explain it all to them; not a word made any sense.

James sighed and brushed his hair out of his eyes. "I _want _to do this_, _I _want _to make it easier on Moony – but do you really think it can be _done, _Sirius?"

Sirius considered the enormous books next to him and sighed. "It _has _to be," he said firmly. "It just _has _to be. Come on, let's go see Moony at the Hospital Wing."

"Why not," agreed James, struggling with the enormous book and managing to stuff it into his bag. "Get your book, let's go.."

After Sirius wrestled his own book into his bag, they set off down the courtyard, talking amicably about all different matters of things, when who would they run into but Lily Evans.

Sensing another long stream of babble, Sirius clamped his foot down on James's. "Hello, Evans," he said smoothly, "scuse us, please."

They were, of course, fully able to go around her, but right then Lily didn't move and neither did James, but that might've been because Sirius had his foot firmly planted on his. Nonetheless, Sirius didn't move either so the point was rather moot.

"D'you guys know where Remus is?" asked Lily without so much as the pleasure of a hello.

James opened his mouth and Sirius screwed his foot around, grinding his friend's foot into the ground. He closed it. "No," Sirius said, crossing his fingers in his pocket, "we don't."

"Why do you want to know?" It seemed James legitimately could not help himself in asking this. He tore his foot out from under Sirius's and gave him a quick glare before looking back at Lily, trying to fix his face into one that was not one of desperation. "Uh, I was just wondering, er, why do – "

"Because he's my friend," said Lily, arching an eyebrow and carelessly tossing a red lock over her shoulder. "D'you know what_ friends _are, Potter?"

"No," said James, rather mesmerized by the way she had tossed her hair.

Sirius punched him.

"Yes!" he gasped. "Yes, I do and Remus is visiting him mum! That is what he is doing! Completely!"

"Oh," said Lily, looking rather confused. "Okay, then. Oh, and I just wanted to ask you, Potter – "

"Yes!" said James excitedly.

"Um..what the Transfiguration homework was.." Lily looked even more confused.

"Page 829, problems five through fifteen," cut in Sirius. "We really must be going now, Evans, we'll see you. C'mon, James.."

And he all but dragged his friend away.

"Did you see that?" James all but shouted when they were out of earshot of Lily, inside the castle. "She asked me what the Transfiguration homework was! _Me! _Not you! You were standing _right there, _but she didn't ask you – she asked me! ME!"

"Yes, I know," said Sirius dryly. "You are not very good at handling yourself around her.."

"That is because she's perfect," explained James. "And you can't just be suave in front of perfection. It just doesn't happen."

Sirius shook his head. "Whatever you say, James.. let's just go find Moony."

"She's clearly in love with me!" sang James, practically skipping down the hall.

–

"LILY IS CLEARLY IN LOVE WITH ME," James gloated.

Remus sighed. "No," he said sensibly, "I don't think so. And would you mind not yelling so much, Pomfrey'll chuck you out again."

"Sorry," said James. "BUT SHE IS IN LOVE WITH ME! She asked me what the Transfiguration homework was!"

"And that's such a big deal," said Remus.

"Yes because Sirius was there too!" cried James. "But she didn't ask him, no, no, no, precious! She asked James, precious!"

"Precious?" questioned Sirus.

"Is he channeling Gollum?" inquired Remus.

"LILY WASN'T IN LOVE WITH GOLLUM!" shouted James joyfully, and that was as far as they got before Madam Pomfrey came storming in and told them that they'd well tried their luck this morning and if they didn't shut up they and all of their offspring would be barred from the Hospital Wing for as long as she was the matron and WELL ON.

–

That night, in their dormitory, the lights turned off and everyone half asleep, James said quietly,

"Y'know, she is kind of perfect..isn't she?"

A variety of groans sounded. "James, get _over _her," groaned Peter. "I'm trying to sleep."

"But her eyes.." James sighed happily. "And her hair...she's so _pretty. _I've never felt like anyone like I feel like Lily. She's _wonderful._"

"You are a creepy stalker," Sirius said. "Now go to sleep."

–

An hour passed.

"Do you guys think she'll ever like me?" asked James. "I mean, I know she's not _really _in love with me now – I mean, the Transfiguration homework was a start, it was a start, but do you think we could build on it? Like maybe next time I see her I could be all, 'you transfigure my heart!' Or is that dumb? That's dumb, isn't it?"

"GO TO SLEEP," yelled Sirius.

–

Another hour passed.

"She's so _wonderful, _though!"

James was promptly pummeled with pillows.


	60. Several More Secrets

Chapter Sixty

Secrets

With October came harsh winds but a subdue of the downpour they had gone through through September. This made for ideal conditions for Quidditch.

–

"Psst. Sirius, wake up!"

"Go 'way, James.."

"Nooo. We have Quidditch practice."

Sirius unwillingly opened an eye. "James," he croaked. "It's the crack of dawn. It's not even season. It's October. Longbottom didn't call for a practice. _Why are you holding your broomstick like that?"_

"To get you to wake up," was Sirius's only warning before James cleanly walloped him over the head with the bristley end of the broomstick.

"OY!" he shouted, jolting up in bed. "What was THAT for?"

"Need to get in shape, don't you?" said James briskly, flipping his broomstick so it was in a less offensive pose. "Need to be ahead of the team! Now, up and out of bed right now! Get some air, boy!"

"I," said Sirius, "am going back to sleep. Good NIGHT." He slammed his curtains together, which never did have a great effect because, y'know, they're_curtains. _But the principle of the idea was generally understood.

"No," said James impatiently. "You are not."

He yanked the curtains open once more (again, not altogether too dramatic) and walloped Sirius over the head again.

"Go _away,_" begged Sirius. "What _time _is it, you idiot?"

"It is," said James, checking his watch with a flourish, "three fifty nine."

Sirius's groan was muffled by his pillows as he collapsed back into bed.

"Wake up," said James. "You have to get up. Now!"

"Sirius," came Remus's weary voice from the corner, "just go with him before he goes mad and kills us all."

Sirius peered out from one corner of his blanket. "If I get up now," he said cautiously, "will you do my Transfiguration homework for me tonight so I can go to bed early?"

"Sirius!" came Remus's indignant voice. "That's cheating!"

"Shush, Moony," said James.

"Do _not _call me that!" Remus had pulled open his curtains and was peering angrily through them.

James closed him back up again. "You'll wake up, and come out and practice with me, and give it absolutely everything you've got?" he clarified warily.

"As much as I have at four in the morning," said Sirius wearily. "And you will do my Transfiguration homework with as much perfection as you can muster?"

"Done, done, done!" said James joyfully, practically bouncing around.

"Done," said Sirius tiredly, and, extremely unwillingly, he flung himself out of bed and reached for clothes that would be more suitable for Quidditch.

–

"See, that wasn't so bad, was it, Sirius?" said James some hours later as the two were sitting on the bench, watching the sun slowly come up and eating jam tarts that they'd nicked from the Great Hall on their way down. "We're usually up early anyway, to do that..thing..that Moony doesn't know about."

"Ask me that at a more re-re-re-reasonable hour," Sirius managed to say, getting slightly tangled up in his yawn and jam tart. "How am I supposed to go to lessons now, huh? We don't get up as early for that.. – for being Animagi, he isn't here, James. Now, how am I supposed to go to lessons?"

"You'll manage," said James dismissively. "Quidditch is more important!"

"Than what?"

"Than what, he says?" James exclaimed, leaping to his feet and waving his jam tart around. "Than WHAT?"

"Yes," said Sirius tiredly.

"Quidditch is more important that everything," said James imperatively. "_Everything, _do you hear me? It's more important than foolish schoolwork! It's more important than meager_ lessons! _More important than food, water, and sleep – be Quidditch!"

"Why are you talking like – "

"Than LIFE!" shouted James.

"Than _Lily?" _said Sirius scathingly.

"Yes," said James.

Sirius's mouth dropped open. "You're kidding."

"No," said James solemnly. "I love Lily Evans dearly – "

"You barely know her.."

"Shut up," said James idly. Then an oddly passionate look came into his eyes, and he struck his fist to the air, still clutching the jam tart. "But my love of Quidditch stretches more – so much more – ever so infinitely more. My love of Quidditch could devour my love of home, my love of food, my love of drink. I would give up my whole life, would it be that I could still play Quidditch."

"You're an idiot," said Sirius. "Are you going to eat that or can I have it?"

Muttering angrily to himself, James sat down again and finished him jam tart. "You just don't understand," he said, gazing out into the pitch as if it was some sort of wonder of the world. In his world, it probably was _the _wonder of the world.

"Well, I sort of do," said Sirius. "I love Quidditch, I always have. It's fun, it's exhilarating, impresses girls..but it's not like I'd _die _if I couldn't play Quidditch."

"I would," said James, his eyes glazed over. "I would.."  
Sirius hit him. "You're an idiot, d'you know that?" he said cheerfully.

"Quidditch," said James simply, "is life."

Sirius shook his head and stood up. "You're a nutter," he said decisively. "A_nutter. _Let's get breakfast, nutter."

"I am not a nutter!"

"Yes you are," said Sirius as the two began making their way back to Hogwarts.

"No," said James, "I'm not. How is it _crazy_ to love Quidditch!"

"With the intensity that you love it, it's completely insane. One day I will record you and then you can hear yourself and your absolute utter _madness, _all right? And then you will see how it is crazy to love Quidditch."

"Oh come on, like you don't have a passion for anything," protested James.

"Well, I do," said Sirius, "but I don't _obsess _over it!"

James stopped in his tracks. "What do you have a passion for?" he demanded.

Sirius reddened. "Nothing," he said.

"It must be something," said James resolutely. "Come on. Tell me!"

"It isn't anything," said Sirius firmly. "And even if it was, it'd be none of your business."

"I'm not moving from this spot until you tell me your passion, Sirius."

"All right. Bye." And he turned and continued walking back to Hogwarts. _One, two, three.._

"Come on!" James cried, catching up with him. "Just tell me. Come on, tell me. Please tell me? Just tell me. Tell me, tell me, tell me.."

"No. Shut up and go eat." They had reached the building. James pulled open the large doors and walked inside.

"Y'know," James said, momentarily distracted, "they really should lock these up more securely."

"It's broad daylight," said Sirius, waving his hand around to indicate the sunshine.

"Well, it wasn't when we left.."

"Yes, but it locked behind us when we left. That's why we've been out here for like an hour and a half, because we had to wait for the doors to be unlocked,_remember?"_

"Yes, I _remember. _But still. Anyone could break in."

"Yeah," said Sirius, and they were quiet for a moment as they walked towards the Great Hall.

"But _anyways,_" said James significantly. "What is this passion you're talking about, that I somehow do not know about?"

"It's nothing.."

"It's _something! _Tell me tell me tell me.."

"It's not anything, all right? Leave me alone."

Andf so it went on, as they walked into the Great Hall and sat down, waiting for the food and the owls and Remus and Peter to arrive.

–

"Are you guys finished with Quidditch, then?" said Remus when he and Peter arrived about fifteen minutes later.

"James is a complete _crazy," _said Sirius resolutely, yawning once more. "I swear, I'm not going to be able to keep my eyes fully open all day..Potter, if I fall asleep in Transfiguration and get detention for it, then I'm going to kill you."

"Tell me that thing you're not telling meeeeeeeee," begged James.

"What thing?" asked Peter.

"I don't know," explained James. "Apparently Sirius has a Secret Passion. And he won't tell me what it is."

Remus bent his head to one side. "A secret passion?" he repeated.

"A secret passion," agreed James. Sirius was firmly ignoring the lot of them and loudly chewing a kipper.

"How did you get into _that _conversation?" Peter wanted to know, serving himself some bacon and contentedly biting into a large piece.

"Y'see, I was going on about how great Quidditch was," said James. "I like it more than _anything, _y'know. More than _Lily Evans._"

"What the ever – _excuse me?"_

James spun around, going bright red. "Lily!" he gasped. "I – I didn't know you were – I'm sorry! I was just – "

"Clearly," said Lily, rather red herself as her friends giggled. They walked off.

James turned and banged his head on the table. "She _always _has to turn up at the worst times," he said ruefully.

"James, you prat," said Sirius with a grin. "You don't just tell the girl you fancy that you prefer a sport over her!"

"Well, how was I to know she was _right behind me?"_

"Always," said Remus wisely, "expect the worst."

"Lily Evans being behind James," Peter piped up, "is not the worst."

"Well said, Peter," said Sirius, nodding sagely. "I'm fairly sure old James would think it would be the best thing to ever happen."

"Shut up, you idiots," said James darkly, savagely biting off a piece of bacon.

"Oh, as if we could.."

"Why are we all so obsessed with bacon?" asked Remus out of the blue, nibbling on some himself. "I mean, look at us! We're all just sitting here, eating bacon!"

The four fell silent, then looked down at their plates, then at each other.

"Well," said Sirius in a this-settles-it tone, "bacon is the best thing ever."

"Not if you ask James," Peter couldn't help but add, grinning wickedly. "If you ask James – "

"QUIDDITCH," said James loudly, "Quidditch is the best thing ever. And – hey! Sirius! You still haven't told me your secret passion!"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I don't _have _a secret passion," he said dismissively. "Except possibly motorcycles."

"There you go," said Remus. "His secret passion is motorcycles."

"Okay, A, what's a motorcycle, and B, it is not!"

"A motorcycle," said Sirius, "is like a car, except it's skinnier and faster and hasn't got a top. It's the most amazing Muggle invention _ever. _And someday, I shall have one."

"Not if I have anything to do with it," said Remus grimly. "If I have anything to do with it, you two are never going to get your hands on cars."

"Don't you _trust _us?" said James, grinning evilly.

"No," said Remus and Peter in unison.

"Oh, come on, Moony," said Sirius, grinning in a way extremely similar to James. "Me and James – "

"James and I."

"No! Me and James, can't you just see us chasing down robbers in our extremely fast cars?"

Remus regarded Sirius. "Is that all you want out of life, Sirius Black?" he said despairingly. "An extremely fast car?"

"No, no," said Sirius dismissively. "Don't be silly. I also want to run a bacon factory."

"_Run?_" repeated Peter dubiously.

"Well, I'd be the CEO. I'd have tons of little minions to do all my bidding for me, and they'd make the bacon, and serve it to me for breakfast, lunch, and dinner."

"That way," said James, "you can spend all your time on your secret passion. Which is, what, exactly?"

Sirius looked at him witheringly. "For the final time," he said, for what would surely not be the final time. "I do _not_ _have _a – "

He was cut off by a sudden onslaught of rushing wings as hundreds of owls cascaded into the Hall. A dark brown owl almost killed Remus, nearly smashing into his face. He ducked just in time.

"What _are _you?" Remus demanded, fending him off and retrieving his letter.

"Curiously enough," said Sirius, sipping his orange juice, "it appears to be an owl."

The alleged owl flew off after savagely pecking Remus's neck – why, no one knew – and Remus cautiously looked at the letter in his hands. "That was a crazy owl," he said. "Who _knows _what kind of person would send a letter through it, and who _knows _what kind of _letter _it _is?"_

"It's just a letter," said James exasperatedly. "Open it, it won't bite."

"You never know these days," muttered Remus darkly before ripping the envelope open. A tiny dot of parchment, folded up to the nines, fell out.

"What's this?" said Remus curiously, picking it up.

"Clearly," said Peter, "it's a letter folded up about a thousand times."

Remus looked at it dubiously. "Who would send me a letter folded up about a thousand times?"  
"Well," said James practically, "you won't know till you open it, and we won't know til you know, so you'd better open it."

"Nosy bum," mumbled Remus, but he started unfolding it.

It took a bit of time to open. Whoever had sent it was clearly determined that it should not be intercepted by anyone, probably under the mindset that anyone who came across it would simply think it a spot, or otherwise get tired of trying to open it about seventeen folds in.

He finally managed to pull it loose of itself, and began reading it silently.

His mouth dropped open.

"What? What does it say?" The rest of the Marauders scrambled about him madly, trying to see what it was, but Remus pulled it to his chest, turning bright red.

"What is it?" demanded James. "C'mon, Moony, tell us!"

"It's.." Remus swallowed. "See for yourself," he finished weakly, handing it to Sirius, who swirled around and held it up with a flourish. "But do _not _read it aloud!" he added quickly as Sirius's mouth opened.

Sirius sighed, closed his mouth, and read the letter.

"Whoa," he said after he was done. He handed it to James. "Just.._whoa, _Moony. Never thought _you, _of all people.."

"Well then," said Remus, looking slightly miffed, as well as extremely shell-shocked. "Clearly, some people think I'm – "

" – the most dashing boy I have ever had the fortune of laying my eyes on, and also extremely handsome?" finished James, looking incredulously first at the piece of parchment, then at Remus, then back to the parchment.

"What!" Peter grabbed the piece of parchment from James and began to read it aloud (just loud enough for the Marauders to hear.) Remus sunk down in his seat, going redder and redder.

"_Dear Remus," _read Peter. "_You know me, I think (and hope) thought I am not sure you know that you know me. To you, I am surely just another silly Gryffindor girl, certainly one of the many that are so taken by you. I am not quite yet brave enough to approach you in person, but I just want you to know that I consider you the most dashing boy I have ever had the fortune of laying my eyes on. You are also extremely handsome. I hope to be able to sign this properly someday, but as for now, know me as Madamoiselle X." _He looked up, a wickeder grin than ever sprawled across his face. "_Moooooooooooony.._"

"_The many that are so taken by you?" _echoed Sirius. "Who _is _this girl, and where are her _eyes?"_

"Shut up."

"Ooooooooooooooh!" James exploded, grinning. "Moony's got a girlfriend, Moony's got a girrrrrrrlfriend!"

"I have_ not.._"

"Not _yet,_" corrected Sirius, looking mildly impressed despite himself. "Wow, Moony. I never thought you'd be the first of us to start getting fan mail."

"_First?_" repeated Remus dubiously.

"Well, surely, once she understands," said James in a isn't-it-obvious voice, messing up his hair nonchalantly, "Lily will – "

"ENOUGH!" shouted Remus, Sirius, and Peter in unison.

James looked mildly offended. "_Anyways,_" he said significantly, then grinned. "Remus has a girlfriend, Remus has a girlfriend, Remus has a girlfriendddd!"

"I wonder who it is," said Peter pensively.

They all fell silent, looking around at all the girls.

"Maybe," said Sirius, grinning wickedly, "it's a _Slytherin _who just _said _she was a Gryffindor."

Remus was going steadier and steadier redder. "Shut up," he said, yet again.

"_Maybe,_" said James, looking utterly malicious, "it's Sirius's _cousin._"

Peter burst into laughter as Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius snorted. "_Yeah,_" he said witheringly. "Right. My cousin. Or maybe it's Snivellus."

This had even Remus laughing. James opened his mouth to make another, probably crude and cruel suggestion, but just then, the bell rang, and there was the general hubbub of a hundred or more people rushing off to their first class.


	61. Boggarts

Chapter Sixty One

Boggarts

As they approached their Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Sirius lagged behind, as he was so wont to do. No one really liked Defense Against the Dark Arts, because despite the fact the teacher was a kindly old man who spoke often of how important it was to be Good, he really could not teach for his life. He started off every lesson with an acknowledgement of each of the dead, missing, or injured that had been reported in the _Prophet, _and a grave comment on how if they ever chose to go over to the Dark, they would be responsible for this sort of thing. Oddly, he always managed to catch Sirius's eye when he said this. For this and about a million other reasons, Sirius reserved a particular loathing for the class. He would then proceed to read the lesson out of the textbook, explain a few things, ask some questions, and assign homework. It was mind-numbingly boring.

"I have a great idea," he said as they drew nearer to the classroom. "Like, a _really _great idea. Let's not go to Defense Against the Dark Arts."

Remus cast Sirius a tired look. "Remember what happened last time you bunked," he reminded him.

Sirius shrugged. "It was worth it," he said with a wry grin. "We got onto the team, didn't we? James, what say you we sneak off to play some Quidditch?"

"Okay!" said James brightly.

"_No,_" said Remus severely.

"Moony, you're a joykill," muttered Sirius as they entered the classroom.

"i think you mean killjoy, Sirius," said Peter.

"No," disagreed Sirius as they sat down. "No. Normal people are killjoys. Moony is such an advanced form at killing joy that he has turned into a _joykill, _someone who _mercilessly murders _joy."

"Except for not," corrected James. "After all, apparently _many girls are taken with him.._" Sirius, he, and Peter cracked up as Remus went bright red once more.

"Will you three _shut up,_" he grumbled, sinking into his chair. "Look, I don't see _you _three getting love notes."

"No," agreed Sirius. "But honestly, I'm pretty happy about that, because the girl who sent you that one sounded like a bit of a lunatic."

"Oh, shut up," said Remus moodily. Khraab meandered into the room just then, and Sirius let out a long sigh.

"I hate him," he said in an undertone as he bounced to the front of the room, a wild grin on his face.

"This class is so massacred," reflected James sadly. "I swear, it could be so good with a decent teacher."

"Maybe one of us ought to become a Defense teacher and save it," suggested Remus.

There was a beat of silence before all four collapsed into laughter.

"Now, boys!" said Khraab, dangling over them like an overly friendly raccoon. "What's so funny, hm?"

"Nothing, sir," said Remus, composing himself and sitting up. "We were just talking."

"I can see that!" said Khraab brightly. "And frankly it would do all four of you good to _stop _doing so!" He laughed heartily.

"Erm," said James, "why would you say that, sir?"

"Why, because none of your test papers came back very well!"

There was a silence.

Khraab burst into laughter at his own joke. "Oh, I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding," he chuckled. "But really, quiet down, you four, or I'll have to separate you."

"Sorry, sir," said Remus. "We'll be more quiet."

"With that out of the way, then.," said Khraab straightening to address the whole class, "let's dive right into it today. Does anyone happen to have a copy of today's – ah, thank you Miss McKinnon – are you all right?"

"Fine." Marlene handed him the newspaper she'd been reading under the table. James noted vaguely that her eyes were bright red – she'd probably been scanning the obituaries.

Khraab pulled the newspapers apart with a flourish and began reading, in a solemn voice, about the masses of tragedies that had taken place. Deaths, disappearances, and Dementor attacks swept over the class and caused more than a few girls to sniffle. James couldn't help but glance over at Marlene. Tears had escaped her eyes now, but then, Merissa and Cara, the two other Gryffindor girls, were crying slightly as well. Lily wasn't, but she looked rather close to it.

_Girls._

Khraab heaved a hefty sigh and folded the paper. "What woe this world has come to," he remarked, looking at Sirius.

"Oh, shut up," muttered Sirius.

"Anyhow!" Khraab clapped his hands. "Today, we will be doing a hands-on lesson, so books away, wands out, everyone stand up!"

Everyone exchanged stunned glances.

"Well?" Khraab looked around. "Come on, now!"

There was an ominous rattling from his desk. He grinned.

In a heartbeat everyone's wands were out and pointed, everyone's books stashed in their bags, and everyone's eyes straight towards Khraab's desk.

"Now, there," said Khraab with a laugh, "don't point it at _me!_ What's in there won't attack you, I promise, not yet."

Fear was suddenly palpable in the room. James turned and glanced again at the girls. Marlene looked worried, Merissa and Cara looked utterly terrified, but Lily looked determined.

_That's why I like Lily, _he decided.

"Everyone stand up now," said Khraab, "and come to the front of the room, please."

Cautiously, in tight little groups, the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw thirteen year olds made their way in front of the desks. They stood by the golden walls, and Khraab promptly touched the desks with a spell that made them stack up onto each other in a corner. He then pointed to his own desk.

"In here," said Khraab grandly, "is a Boggart. Can anyone – yes, Mr. Lupin?"

Remus had shot his hand up in the air, looking breathless. "It's a shapeshifter," he said promptly. "It takes the form of the viewer's worst fear!"

A worried murmur ran throughout the class.

"Excellent," said Khraab. "Ten points to Gryffindor. Now, does anyone know how to vanquish a Boggart?"

It was Sirius, this time, who raised his hand, looking slightly apprehensive. Khraab looked determinedly past him, and he rolled his eyes.

"Mr. Potter?" said Khraab instead. "You haven't been contributing much."

Sirius lowered his hand, clenching his fist.

"Erm.." James racked his brains. "I'm not sure, sir."

"Very well." Khraab looked about pointedly, and finally said, as if uttering a rude word, "Mr. Black, then?" He had a strange special infliction on the word Black.

James growled under his breath.

"The spell _riddikulus,_" said Sirius clearly, "plus the one who says it thinking of a way the fear can be made funny, and then laughter – laughter is the one that does it, in the end."

Khraab regarded him with contempt for a moment before nodding curtly. "Very well – yes, that's it. Now, in this locked desk, there is a Boggart."

As if on cue, it rattled ominously once more. Everyone shivered.

Khraab smiled, his anger gone with Sirius's voice. "Now, now, nothing to be afraid of," he said heartily. "Boggarts are, essentially, harmless – they'll just scare you. Which is why it is crucial we learn to defend ourselves against them – fear can be used in the worst of ways, if it is so chosen to be.."

There was a short silence, then Khraab clapped his hands. "In this case, however," he said, "we have the upper hand. Can anyone tell me why?"

Marlene raised her hand. Khraab nodded at her.

"There're so many of us," said Marlene, "the Boggart'll get confused and not know where to go?"

"Right! Take fifteen points! Now then!" he said cheerfully. "Let's all take out our wands and – loudly now – practice the spell. Repeat after me – _riddikulus!"_

After it had been practiced a few times, Khraab moved towards the desk. He stopped and looked around. "I will need," he said, "a volunteer."

For a moment, nobody said anything – then Lily stood up and strode, quite calmly, to the front of the room. "Oh, yes," she said confidently, looking extremely pleased with herself. "I'd_ love _to take that on.."

James's stomach dropped. She was brave, too. Was there anything this girl _wasn't? _

No, he decided as Khraab beamed at Lily and awarded her ten points for Gryffindor for her excellence. No, there was not, anything, at all, that was remotely wrong with her.

"Right, Miss Evans," said Khraab. "What is it in this world that you fear most?"

Lily considered. Then she said, quite decisively, "Wolves, sir."

James saw Remus flinch slightly. He gave him a gentle, reassuring punch in the arm.

"Right. Now, can you think of any way to make wolves amusing?"

Lily considered a bit more. "Well," she said, "puppies are funny, and wolves are related to dogs, and hats are amusing, so I suppose that the wolf shrunk to a very small puppy wearing a ridiculous hat might work."

There was a general laugh, and if James laughed a bit harder than most than _so what, _that was what.

"Good!" said Khraab. "Now, I want you to imagine – all of you – the thing you fear most, and, like Miss Evans demonstrated for us, some way to make it _amusing._"

There was a general silence as people pondered the thought. James looked around, wondering what everyone in the room feared. Remus, perhaps, would see a ghost – he seemed like the sort of person to fear ghosts. Lily feared wolves, did she? Interesting..

"Right – done?" said Khraab, giving James a start – he hadn't thought of anything. Without waiting for an answer he turned to Lily. "Ready, Mam'oiselle Evans?"

Lily giggled. "Completely," she said lightly, and then and there, James decided he was in love with her.

"Right then – wand at the ready." And, slowly, dramatically, Khraab ripped open the desk and a huge wolf bounded out, baring his enormous teeth. For a moment, James saw Remus's knees buckle as he leaned against the wall, and in that moment he realized that Remus, too, perhaps more than any of them, must have been terrified of wolves.

Sirius noticed as well. James put one arm on Remus's shoulder and Sirius put one on his elbow. He was trembling slightly, and Lily too looked absolutely terrified.

For a moment it was a rather scary moment in the classroom. Then, with all the ferocity of the Gryffindor she was, Lily took a deep breath, brandished her long slender wand, and positively shouted, _"RIDDIKULUS!"_

The wolf stumbled forward and then it was a puppy, a small puppy wearing a cute little hat, and Remus was breathing again. Khraab looked positively ecstatic, and in seconds the terrified air in the room had been replaced and was now one of excitement. "Excellent! Merissa!" Khraab shouted. "Forward!"

Merissa Anehem hurried to the front, slightly pale, and the hatted puppy rippled. There was a loud crack and very quickly it was ten dozen rocks, falling from seemingly nowhere all around her –

"_Riddikulus!" _she shouted, and the rocks turned to cotton balls, scattering all over the floor.

"Angle!" yelled Khraab, and Marina Angle of Ravenclaw ran forward, wand hand shaking as she clutched it tight and the cotton balls turned into a huge, overbearing Yeti – "RIDDIKULOUS!" – and the Yeti's hair had fallen off, it was entirely bald –

"Cannapp!" And the other Marina, also of Ravenclaw by a mysterious coincidence, hurried forward and turned the Boggart into a troll, which was quickly banished and replaced by a very small version of the troll with short stubby legs, angrily waving his fist in the air.

The Boggart writhed as everyone laughed – CRACK, and it was a bloody eyeball, CRACK, and it was a snail, and one more CRACK and it was half a slug.

No one knew quite what it was going for there, but everyone laughed. Remus in particular found this extremely amusing, and nearly fell over laughing.

"Right, we're getting there, he's confused!" yelled Khraab, who looked absolutely high on excitement. "Remus!"

Remus ran forward, still shaking with laughter, and the half of the slug was suddenly a glowing orb that James realized after a moment was the moon.

_Oh, no, _thought James wildly, _not here, not now, his secret admirer might be here –_

and, greatly impressing everyone who knew what he was going through – namely, James, Sirius, and Peter – Remus took a deep breath, flung his wand forward, and screamed, "_RIDDIKULOUS!"_

The moon became an egg, that fell on the ground and shattered into a million pieces.

"Good!" yelled Khraab, who also looked deeply impressed. "James!"

_Oh God was not expecting that - haven't even – _James ran forward, completely unsure of what he was going to see or what he was going to do with it.

The egg's pieces, which had for a few glorious moments had looked so very defeated, rose with a crack into a Death Eater.

James cringed, dimly acknowledging how much sense that made. For a moment his insides felt a bit like gel, and he didn't know_ what _to do –

then out of the corner of his eye he saw Lily and received a lovely zap of adrenaline. "RIDDIKULOUS!" he shouted, and the Death Eater's mask was hot pink.

There was a general shout of laughter.

"Right, we're NEARLY THERE!" Khraab practically shrieked. "Black!"

Sirius ran forward with a determined look on his face, and the Death Eater was, in one swift motion, a towering woman who an unpleasant amount of people recognized as the very unpleasant person who was Walburga Black – Sirius's mother.

There was a general silence. Khraab smirked and James fought the urge to storm over and just punch him in the face.

He was seriously considering doing just that, or something equally as drastic, because Sirius did not actually seem to be moving that much after about thirteen seconds of silence.

"Do not," whispered Remus.

James scowled.

Sirius drew in his breath, pointed his wand, and - finally - said, voice shaking slightly, "_Riddikulus!"_

In an instant, Sirius's mother was shrinking – smaller and smaller, until she was only two feet tall.

The color returned to Sirius's face, and as the whole class exploded in laughter, there was another CRACK! and the Boggart was reduced to wisps.

"Very good, everyone!" cried Khraab, applauding. "Right – five points to everyone who defeated the Boggart – for homework, be so kind as to read chapters seventeen to nineteen and write a response to the questions on page one forty-seven – dismissed."

Everyone spilled out of the room, talking excitedly about the lesson. It was clearly the best lesson anyone had ever had.

"Did you see the way those rocks turned into cotton balls!"

"And he was half a slug!"

"And the wolf!"

"_Half a slug!"_

"I wish I could've faced the Boggart," said Peter wistfully. He thought about it. "Actually, no, I don't.."

Everyone laughed at that, and for a few minutes it was all well and good – then (and no one was sure who had first said it) the mumble came "_Sirius Black's afraid of his mum_" and then louder, "Sirius Black's afraid of his mum!" and then, _"Sirius Black's AFRAID of his MUM!" _

Sirius had gone red. Remus rolled his eyes. James was not impressed.

"Let's just go," said Peter resignedly. "Idiots will be idiots."

And the four hurried off to lunch.

".._Half a slug!_"

* * *

**I feel like I lose, like, five readers between every update because they get tired of waiting. :P**

**Sorry for the long wait, again. I'm working on it! This story is at a vague standstill at actual writing time, but there's still 10 or so chapters I haven't put up, and I'm trying to get it moving again, and it's summer, so yeah, hopefully more updates are on the horizon. Please do review! It encourages!  
**


	62. Australia

Chapter Sixty Two

Australia

"Afraid of my auntie, Sirius?"

"Shut up, Narcissa."

"What's she ever done to you, _anyway?"_

"Leave me alone."

"You know, I was just off to write to my dear sister Bella – maybe I should include something about how her darling cousin is terrified of his – "

"Shut UP, Narcissa!" shouted Sirius. _She better not..how does she even know, anyway?_

_Oh, yeah. Everyone in the whole damn school does._

News traveled remarkably quickly in Hogwarts, even when you weren't sharing a class with Slytherins. And thus, everyone in the school somehow knew that Sirius was afraid of his own mother. He wasn't sure why this was such big news.

_People here are very easily amused,_ he decided.

"Hey, Narcissa," said Sirius, deciding to try a different tactic, "you know what I heard?" Without waiting for her to say anything, he forged on. "_I_ heard," he said, "that Lucius Malfoy – you like him, don't you? – asked Alecto Carrow to Hogmseade."

"_What?_" In a moment, Narcissa had disappeared, flying in the opposite direction, sure to be seeking gossip.

Sirius rolled his eyes, turned, and set off down the corridor towards Muggle Studies. James was sick in the Hospital Wing with the flu today; so he'd be on his own. It was annoying, because it set them back a bit on their Animagi research, among other reasons, but they'd been making pretty good headway so that was all right, he supposed.

Muggle Studies had been pretty boring up to now; they'd been focusing mainly on definitions - the pronunciations and spellings meanings to words like _electricity _and _television _and_ pound _and _pence. _They'd learned all sorts of different words, and Sirius's conclusion was that Muggles simply had too many words and if they cut down a little then maybe they would discover magic. It was midway through October now, and they'd finally finished the vocabulary. They'd had a massive vocab test the day before (that Sirius had almost failed) and apparently today Professor – sorry, _Miss _Burbage had said they'd start learning actual subjects! That actual Muggles! Learned in actual schools! Oh the utter joy! Exclamation _point!_

Sirius was not impressed. At all.

He sighed and trudged up another corridor, then finally approached the Muggle Studies room. He pulled the door open and walked in, taking his usual seat, looking wistfully at where James usually sat.

He was considering just running away when, quite suddenly, Lily Evans sat down next to him.

"Hello, Sirius," said Lily, busily taking out the strange things called 'pens' and books and laying them neatly in front of her.

"What are you doing here?" asked Sirius with all the politeness of a thirteen year old boy.

"I'm not speaking to Marlene," she said simply, "so I'm sitting with you instead."

She turned around and glared at Marlene. Marlene glared back. Alexander, looking very uncomfortable between the two girls, hastily bit into a sandwich that was in his bag for some reason.

"Where did he get that sandwich?" asked Sirius with a great deal of interest.

Lily disdained to reply. She glared at Marlene for another few moments, then went back to stacking and restacking her books.

"I want a sandwich," muttered Sirius.

"Where's Potter?" asked Lily.

Sirius made a mental note to tell James she had asked. He would be over the moon. "He's sick," he said, examining Alexander's bag from afar. Did he hide the sandwich in the back pocket? Did he perhaps have more sandwiches in there? He was a Hufflepuff, surely he was kind enough to share?

"What's wrong with him?" asked Lily.

Sirius's attention was momentarily diverted from sandwiches. He looked at Lily. "Why are you so wondering?"

Lily huffed. "I was just _worried _about him," she said. "Am I not allowed to be _worried?"_

James would be kneeling at her with a ring any minute now. "Yes, yes, whatever. Do you have any sandwiches? I'm hungry."

Lily flung a pen at him. "You just ate breakfast_!"_ she hissed.

"So?!"

"Ugh, you are useless." She crossed her arms over her chest.

After contemplating sandwiches for a few more moments, Sirius turned to Lily. "What did you and Marlene fight over?"

"None of your business."

Sirius sighed. It was really useless, trying to talk to girls. Particularly this one. But most girls were quite mad.

"She's being so _stupid,_" burst out Lily, glaring at Marlene's back.

Sirius sighed. "I thought it wasn't any of my busin – "

"She's gone and she won't stop _prattling _about this – this thing, and she's being _so _annoying, and it'll _never _work out, so she's being so _stupid!"_ Lily glared. "So stupid."

Sirius disdained to reply.

"Hey, Black," said Alexander McKinnon, coming over to him a few seconds later.

"Hey, Alex."

"Where's James?"

"He's sick."

"Gah."

"Do you have another sandwich?"

"..No." He ran back to his chair and sneakily removed another sandwich from his bag.

Sirius sighed.

"So what's wrong with him?" Alexander called from his table, pretending not to eat a sandwich.

"He has the plague," replied Sirius.

"That's a terrible thing to say!" cried Lily. "You shouldn't joke about things like that, you know!"

"I thought you hated James."

"That doesn't mean I want him to die, OKAY?!"

Sirius got the distinct impression Lily would stick up for a whale shark that'd eaten her whole family if it meant going against him, at this point. She was clearly in a very bad mood.

"Hey, Black," said Marlene McKinnon a few minutes later, calling over from the next table.

Sirius sighed. "Hey, McKinnon," he said tiredly.

"Where's James?"

"_When_ did he get so popular? He's sick."

"Oh."

More people slowly leaked in.

"Hey, Black," said a Hufflepuff named Thomas Riddley, "where's James?"

"Sick.."

"Hey, Black, I hear you're afraid of your mum."

"Shut up, Carrow," said Sirius sorely.

Amycus Carrow, a Hufflepuff – the very brother of the girl Sirius had sent Narcissa running after – laughed. "So where's Potter?"

Sirius sighed. "Sick."

It was remarkable. Sirius started keeping count, and by the time_ Miss _Burbage came in, he had nine people ask where James was.

_Miss _Burbage was literally always late. No one knew where she would go before classes, but rumors that ranged from that she ran out to The Three Broomsticks and drank a Firewhiskey before every class, to she was having a secret affair with Professor Flitwick, abounded.

_We need more interesting news at this school, _thought Sirius, _if the most interesting pieces of gossip are that I'm afraid of my mother, the Muggle Studies teacher comes a few minutes late to class, and where James Potter is._

Although, he realized, it wasn't like things were much better with the Marauders. The only pieces of gossip _they _had were who Remus's secret admirer was (there'd been no more letters since the one last week, but it was still a topic of general interest) and what – he rolled his eyes – his "secret passion" was.

Which he was not going to divulge to anyone, ever.

"Hello everyone!" called Miss Burbage. After a few moments, quick arguments were settled and conversations were hastily blanketed, and everyone quieted. The last time they hadn't silenced for a few minutes, Miss Burbage had given them something very confusing called "lunch detention." They just kinda went with it.

"Role!" she chirped, and proceeded to take role. Everyone dully agreed that they were here. When she came to James's name, of course, no one said anything.

"Where's Mr. Potter?" she asked. "Sirius? Where's James?"

"He moved to Australia," said Sirius bluntly.

The professor gasped. "Pardon_?"_

"He moved..to..Australia," said Sirius slowly. "He's been planning it for months, weren't you informed?"

"Mr. Black," said Miss Burbage tartly, "I'm certain Professor Dumbledore would inform me if one of my students left the school!"

Everyone else stayed very quiet, looking at Sirius interestedly, wondering if this would possibly spice up what was surely to be an extremely otherwise dull lesson.

"Well," said Sirius solemnly, mind racing as he mentally embroidered his fabrications, "you see, it was quite a sudden thing."

The professor looked very confused. "Pardon?"

"Yes," said Sirius. "You see, Miss Burbage, James has a great deal of family."

"Yes, I – "

"And," continued Sirius, "do you also know he has never seen antidisestablishmentarianism snow?" He pictured Remus if he would be here right now, and grinned internally as he remembered the story they had created in their first year. How clever he was, rehashing it like this!

"Antidisestablishmentarianism snow?" repeated Miss Burbage faintly, looking very worried.

"Yes," said Sirius solemnly. "Anyhow. Every – " he thought hard for a moment, remembering Christmas of first year – "every twenty years – " that was it, wasn't it? "every twenty years in Australia, it snows a very special sort of this snow, antidisestablishmentarianism snow. It's amazing, truly, an absolute sight to behold. Now, James – as we have established – has quite a lot of family, spread both all over England and all over the _world. _Do you know, his great-great grandfather's cousin six times removed's aunt's sister-in-law's brother-in-law – _he _lives in New York City! Aren't you always telling us how that's something like Muggle Central?"

"Y-yes.."

"It's true!" It wasn't true at all. "And that very brother-in-law – that is, James's great-great grandfather's cousin six times removed's aunt's sister-in-law's brother in law – _he _visited Australia once! And he was lucky enough to see those snowflakes. And he told Mr. Potter – James's great-great grandfather, that is – and Mr. Potter swore on that day that one of his family would see those snowflakes. This is the year that those snowflakes will fall, and he – an old, very old man now, he begged for one of his family, and of his family, to go out there to Australia and see them. And so," Sirius concluded, "James's dear mother has moved him and herself out Down Under for about a year." He smiled charmingly.

There was a long, long silence._ Miss _Burbage looked positively horrified.

Just then, James walked in. "Sorry, Miss Burbage, I was a bit ill, but I'm better, so I decided I might as well come," he said. "What did I miss?"

There was a deafening silence, then the whole class exploded in laughter.

Alexander clapped his hands.

–

Sirius was very proud of the accomplishment, and after he'd explained it between gales of laughter to James, he was also very amused. Miss Burbage, utterly flummoxed, awarded Sirius an angry detention and tried to go on with the lesson, but no one really paid attention. James was enthralled about sitting next to Lily, so it was all rather interesting.

As James and Sirius were walking to Transfiguration, still laughing about Sirius's glorious prank, they came across Regulus.

Sirius eyed his brother.

Regulus eyed his brother back.

"Sirius – "

"I'll catch up," muttered Sirius, and James nodded and hurried ahead.

"Regulus," he said coolly.

"Sirius," replied Regulus as they fell in step.

They walked in silence for a moment, not entirely sure what to say to one another.

"Where are you off to?" said Sirius finally.

"Defense," said Regulus. He paused. "Hear you're afraid of Mum." The beginning of a smirk went across his face.

"Oh, like you aren't," snapped Sirius, and he let the crowd separate them and stalked off, good mood dissipating entirely, feeling altogether quite betrayed.

–

"Don't worry about him, mate," James said to him when he caught up. "After all, he didn't just convince _Miss _Burbage that I'd moved to Australia!" And he was off in gales of laughter once more.

Sirius's anger melted once more, and he grinned. He couldn't help but laugh, too.

* * *

**I'm alive and the story's being continued. Updates to follow. Review if you're still reading! **


	63. Admirers and Lists

Chapter Sixty Three

Admirers and Lists

"Oh, God, Remus, look out, that evil owl is coming again."

"Oh, no," groaned Remus, propping his newspaper up protectively as the furious bird swept down on him, cawing like a mad thing. It pecked him over the head fifteen times, basically threw a letter at him, and shot away.

"That thing is mad," said Peter conversationally. "What does your secret admirer say then?"

"Oooooh, yes," said Sirius with an evil grin, "what _does _Miss Many-girls-must-be-taken-with-you say?"

"Shut up, you," said Remus, tearing it open. He held it at arm's-length, as if it might bite him like the owl had, and read it through carefully, eyes widening as he did.

"Let's see," said James, looking greatly interested, in a completely evil way.

"No," said Remus, stuffing it in his pocket.

"Peter," said Sirius, chewing his bacon, "seize the bacon."

"Right," said Peter, reaching for it.

Remus snatched his bacon away. "All right, all right, here." He sighed and surrendered the letter. "Y'know, intercepting mail is a crime."

"_Dear Remus, You are the light of my life, though I cannot say who I am,_" read Sirius.

Remus cast his eyes to the sky and pretended he was someplace else, ignoring James and Peter laughing and his own face burning.

"_I realize that I may come off as a bit strange to you.._" Sirius burst into laughter. "Yeah, just a _bit! _And this girl talks like she's from the fifteenth century or something mad like that!"

"Give it back."

"_..but rest assured, I am a completely normal girl. I also know you. And I think you know me. Your friends know me, in any case, I even speak to some of them, on occasion. I wish I could speak to you, but when I see you, my voice simply disappears from my throat. When I look up at you – I like how tall you are, by the way – I simply flush and must run away, because I simply can't speak straight around you. Your eyes are like chocolate. I hope for the day that I can reveal myself to you. Until then, your secret admirer."_

_"_Give it _back."_

Peter was almost doubled over, tears streaming down his cheeks. James was shaking with laughter. Sirius looked like he was about to be hysterical. Remus snatched the letter from him, face burning.

He folded the letter up and stowed it in the pockets of his robes.

"Your _eyes_ are like _chocolate!?_"

"She likes how _tall _you are!"

"Ooh, Remus, my voice just _disappears _from my throat!"

"I cannot _bear _it!"

"Shut up."

It was going to be a rather long day.

–

That night, when Remus walked into his dorm, James and Sirius and Peter were sitting on the floor, debating something in low voices.

"Uh, guys? What are you doing?"

"Trying to figure out who your secret admirer is!" exclaimed Sirius, looking up.

Remus sighed and sat down. "_Do _you three have _lives?"_

"Why, yes," said James. "We're giving them up in order to work this out."

"We're giving up _our lives _for you, Moony," intoned Peter. "_I hope you understand how much you owe me."_

Remus passed a weary hand over his face. "I give up," he said to the general public. "All right. Who've you narrowed this down to?"

"We're making a list," said Sirius grandly.

"A list."

"A list!"

"A list."

"Would you like to see the list?" said James, picking it up off the ground.

"A LIST," shouted Remus.

"We've established this. Here." He handed it to him.

The list went as followed:

_Lily Evans. (please, please no..) (James fancies Lily Evans!) (I DO NOT.)_

_Bellatrix. (Oh Merlin. Ew.) (What? It's possible!) (No, Peter! It is not!)_

_Narcissa. (Why my cousins? Why my _evil_ cousins? Oh no – )_

_ANDROMEDA! (SHE IS _ENGAGED!_) (You know who else was engaged? MERLIN.) (Merlin? What the hell?) (Merlin. When he cheated on his engagee, Lady Macbeth, and got together with Gertrude!) (James, Merlin and Shakespeare are completely different.) (I thought Shakespeare was just the Muggles' word for Merlin? And all those ladies were his various girlfriends? (They were his _characters, _you idiot he was a writer!) (Oh..how do you know that?) (Andromeda, actually. You're an idiot.) (Thank you very much, Sirius.)_

_Merissa Anhem. (I don't think so.) (yeah, me neither, but it could be!) (it could also be Bellatrix.) (ARGH MENTAL IMAGES AHHHH)_

_Marlene McKinnon. (She's _taller_ than him.) (You sound like a girl..) (What? She is! She can't like him!) (Anything. is. Possible.)_

_Cara Rahl. (She's pretty, that one.) (Ooooooooooooooh, Peter has a cruuuush!) (I do not! I just think she's pretty!) (Uh-huh..)_

Remus put the paper down and sighed a long sigh. "Somehow," he said, "I do not think Bellatrix Black is the one writing me love notes."

* * *

**Aaaaaaah guys thank you so so much for all the lovely reviews! 3 I honestly am going to try to update this more often! Hope you enjoyed this one?**

**So who do you think is Remus's secret admirer? Place your suggestions in the review box!**


	64. Of Quidditch and Lily Evans

Chapter Sixty Four

November was Quidditch season, so a general buzz of happiness went up around then. James and Sirius were determined to absolutely dominate this year and win the Cup, because they'd been out of the running quite early on last year, to great pain and shame from everyone in Gryffindor, even people who didn't care about Quidditch. James simply got into the showers and refused to get out.

It was not a pleasant time.

Thus, everyone was glad for the new season dawning. Captain Longbottom took Quidditch very seriously (not quite as seriously as James, but that was James) and for a time, the team was generally in the sky more than they were on earth. This was excellent, as the players on the Gryffindor Quidditch team all did love the skies, but it did have its downside. Mainly, the general idea of 'schoolwork' and 'having an actual life'. These two things were quickly ended for the members of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Quite quickly, James and Sirius's entire lives became a mixture of studying, Quidditch, and hidden Animagi work.

Another one of the benefits, Sirius mused during a practice, slamming the Bludger to his fellow Beater Tom Marsipal, a seventh year, was that in general, you became good friends with the lot of the team, and that was just pleasant. Most of the team were much older than him and James, and they probably wouldn't've known them otherwise, which would've been a shame because most of them were in fact lovely people. There was their captain, Frank Longbottom, who was immensely friendly and very smart, albeit a bit mad. He too was a seventh year, and constantly prattling on about a Ravenclaw in fifth year named Alice Jefferson who he was in_ love _with and was going to _marry.. _James, Sirius was told, found it very relatable indeed, and was very tempted to ask him tips (because somehow, he'd gotten Alice to actually _go out _with him) but he wasn't about to tell anyone that he liked Lily. Sirius exasperatedly pointed out that literally everyone in the castle, even _Dumbledore,_ even _McGonagall _knew that he liked Lily, but James ignored him.

Then there was Sirius's fellow Beater, Tom Marsipal. He was very tall and skinny and had very blond hair and laughed at things that weren't funny and made jokes that weren't funny, but something about Tom Marsipal was friendly, and something about Tom Marsipal made you laugh, too. It wasn't that he was funny looking, or anything, but his state of constant laughter made you equally amused at life. Marsipal was best friends with Marie Gonzo, the Keeper. Marie who was a large sixth year who liked to laugh just as much as he did. Neither of them showed any particular sign of wanting to date one another – they were just friends. They never even seemed to talk much, they just laughed a lot together.

The Chasers, Dorcas Meadows and Audrey Taielon, were two tall skinny fourth years who were very quiet and serious, but you'd never have guessed it from their Quidditch skills. On the pitch, they became different people entirely – they had a certain ordered madness to them, and on the pitch, the only thing that mattered to their entire existences was getting the Quaffle in the hoop. They worked absolutely splendidly with James, so really, everything worked out perfectly.

So, Sirius thought, walloping the Bludger away from James, Quidditch definitely had its perks.

–

"James..James.._James.._"

James Potter slept blissfully on.

"JAMES!" yelled Remus. "Get up or I'm pouring my orange juice on you!"

James Potter muttered slightly in his sleep.

"James, I'm going to steal your bacon," said Peter blithely.

It was a mark of just how tired James was that he didn't immediately sit up. He did after a moment, but it took him that moment.

"Quidditch is clearly taking a toll on someone," said Sirius through a mouthful of bacon.

"No," said James, finding his glasses, wiping a shred of cereal on them, and putting them on. He yawned. "No..at least I'm not falling asleep in _class, _yeah?"

"I'll give it a day and a half," predicted Remus, but James's attention was already gone. He'd caught someone else's eye.

There were three coinciding sighs. "James, this has gotten out of hand – " began Sirius, but suddenly, James had gotten up and was walking away.

"Oh Merlin," said Peter after a moment.

"He _isn't,_" said Sirius in a dismayed voice.

"Not _here,_" groaned Remus. "Oh, Merlin, not _here.._he just woke up from falling asleep at _breakfast, _he's...oh, _Merlin.._"

"Someone should stop him," suggested Peter.

"He'd just try again in a probably even more public area," said Sirius resignedly. "All we can do is hope now..maybe she'll have a brain lapse.."

"Doubt that somehow," sighed Remus. "Oh, no.."

James approached Lily, the look on his face a mingle of determination and sheer terror. Determination seemed to be dominating, but sheer terror looked like it might kick in at any moment.

"Um, hi, Lily," said James, and Peter groaned. Remus buried his face in his hands.

The Gryffindor third years went relatively quiet, as did a group of nearby fourth years. Everyone looked at James.

Lily took a bite of her kipper, looking confused and almost nervous. "What do you want, Potter?"

"Not here, not here, _not here,_" muttered Remus. "Ask her for a quill or something.."

"Well, Lily," said James, and sheer terror seemed to be taking over – but it didn't. "Um – wangomeadwime?"  
Sirius closed his eyes.

"Pardon?" said Lily, looking utterly befuddled.

"Well – Hog – Hog – meade – Hogsmeade weekend is this Saturday," stammered James. "And I was just wondering – would you like to go with me?"

The look on Lily's face was later described as a whole multitude of things. _Even more confused _was how Remus put it, and Peter suggested _vaguely insulted. _Sirius insisted she looked simply terrified, and all three of them agreed that she was probably more shocked than she'd ever been that moment than she was in her entire life.

Marlene, Cara, and Merissa exploded in giggles, whispering to each other and Lily as she stared at James, emotions scattering across her face.

James swallowed and crossed his fingers in his pockets.

Then she said it –

"Blimey – _no, _Potter, of course I won't go to Hogsmeade with you! No!"

All the girls in the general vicinity burst into laughter, as did the strange onlooking fourth years. The terror and determination were both wiped from James's face, replaced with first shock and then a certain kind of tragic horror that comes in defeat.

"Ohh dear," muttered Sirius.

"Here we go," sighed Remus. "Poor guy.."

"Let's go," suggested Peter, and the three of them hurried towards James, knotted around him, and led him out of the Hall.

* * *

**ah yes, this story still exists, is still being written, and will someday be finished aha :P i hope you enjoyed this chapter greatly, and do know that this is only the beginning of james and lily! drop a review if you would x**


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